Total Drama World Tour and it's 17 person cast is one of the most beloved seasons and casts-- but what if the 7 non-competitiors had competed in this season? This reimagining by Epic answers that question!.
Chapter One- Walk Like An Egyptian Part 1
“Welcome back to Total Drama, for our EXCITING third season!” Chris stood on a runway, smiling. “The world is gonna be mine. Sea to shining sea! Sadly, I have to share it with a 3 ring traveling freakshow. Also known as the Total Drama contestants.” Chris chuckled.
“We have every single contestant from Total Drama here with us, and two new contestants! Every episode, they’ll compete in a challenge in a different part of the world, and one loser will get off my plane, for good.” Chris laughed again. “And the last loser standing scores one million dollars! Now, let’s bring in our contestants!”
A bus pulled up to the runway, and the door opened. “Introducing Geoff, Bridgette, Izzy, and Trent!”
Geoff and Bridgette walked out of the bus kissing. Trent walked out and waved to the camera, until Izzy jumped on his head. “HAHAHAHHAHA SEASON THREE! YAY! I hope we’re doing movies again, that was sooooo fun. Has anyone ever told you your head is really long?” Izzy asked.
“Not...recently,” Trent said.
“Also here, Gwen and DJ!” Chris said.
“Hey, Gwen!” Trent smiled.
Gwen hid behind DJ, who walked out of the bus. “Sorry, you’re on your own for this one,” he chuckled.
Gwen sighed and was about to talk to Trent, but Chris cut her off.
“Also here are some of your favorite losers who DIDN’T make it Total Drama Action! Say hello to Ezekiel, Eva, Noah, Katie, Sadie, Tyler, Cody, and Courtney!” Chris grinned, as they walked out of the bus.
“I am not a LOSER! I did make it to Total Drama Action!” Courtney yelled at Chris.
“Only because you SUED the show. Therefore, you get to stand with those lovely people!” Chris grinned as the camera panned over to Ezekiel picking his nose, Katie and Sadie gossiping, Eva lifting weights, Noah reading a book, Tyler, who had tripped over his own feet and was lying on the ground, and Cody, who winked at Courtney.
“Ugh,” she groaned, and walked over to the contestants who had already arrived.
“Also here and competing, Owen, Heather, and Leshawna!” Chris introduced.
“Finally! If I was on a bus with Heather and her new fur for any longer, I would have hurt somebody!” Leshawna chuckled.
“It’s not fur! It’s HUMAN extensions!” Heather yelled.
“That’s what she says.” Gwen whispered to Leshawna, who laughed. Heather glared at both.
“WOOO! SEASON THREE! THIS IS GONNA BE-- wait, why is there a plane there? We aren’t flying, right?” Owen gulped.
“Yes, yes we are.” Chris grinned.
“Oh, that’s...um…not a problem. I got over my fear of flying ages ago...remember that fear challenge...yeah...totally over it...not a problem.” Owen looked around nervously.
“And our final batch of contestants, Justin, Lindsay, Harold, Beth, and Duncan!” Chris grinned.
Justin posed as he stepped off the bus, causing all the girls to swoon. Duncan kicked Harold off the bus, and then stepped off himself.
“Hey! Watch it!” Harold complained.
“Move it or lose it, dweeb.” Duncan said.
“Good to know you haven’t become any less of an IDIOT between seasons! GOSH!” Harold said, walking away.
Lindsay and Beth ran off the bus together. “Oh my gosh, I can’t believe we’re on ANOTHER season together!” Beth said, excitedly.
“I know right! It’s sooo great!” Lindsay smiled.
“Pfft. What posers. I mean, we’re obviously the best best friends here.” Sadie rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, they’re like…” Katie began.
“Amateurs.” Both said at the same time, they then started squealing.
“We are sooooo in-sync.” They said once again, simultaneously. They then began to squeal louder.
“Alright, now that all of our regular contestants are here, time to introduce our two new contestants!” Chris grinned. “First up, a latin gentlemen who’s so charming he puts royalty to shame, Alejandro!” Alejandro smirked and stepped off the bus.
“Isn’t that the Total Drama Dirtbags guy?” Heather said.
“Yes, and I was just paid for that silly stunt by Chris. I can assure you I am not a dirtbag,” Alejandro smiled and bowed.
“We don’t think you’re a dirtbag.” Beth said, sounding smitten.
“Um, what happened to me? I’m hot? Remember?” Justin asked.
“Eh.” Beth said.
“I still think you’re hot, buddy.” Owen said and hugged Justin, crushing him.
“Thanks.” Justin whimpered.
“Our second new contestant is a Total Drama superfan who’s addicted to sugar, and addicted to Cody, Sierra!” Chris introduced, as she stepped off the bus.
“OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD I’m on Total Drama! I’ve been waiting for this moment forever!” Sierra said at an extremely fast pace.
“OHMYGOSH CODY! I’m your biggest fan!” She squealed.
“He has fans?” Gwen whispered to Leshawna. She shrugged.
“Well, not my fault the ladies can’t get enough of this.” Cody flexed and winked at Gwen, who rolled her eyes.
Sierra took out measuring tape. “Your muscles are so much BIGGER than last time!” Sierra yelled.
“Last time?” Cody asked.
“I mean, the first time! Because I never snuck into your house and measured it in your sleep. Heh, heh, heh….” Sierra trailed off.
“Alright, now that...whatever that was is over, it’s time to board! Chef?” Chris asked, as the gigantic jet slowly rolled up to the contestants.
“This is the Chris McLean Jumbo Jet, aka, where you’ll be staying this season!” Chris grinned, as a large chunk of the plane came off.
“That’s comforting.” Noah said.
“WE’RE FLYING ON THAT?” Owen yelled. “I mean, everything’s fine, yep, no fears of flying here!”
“Is that thing even safe?” Bridgette questioned.
“I’ll get back to you on that one. Now boarding!” Chris hollered, as the 24 contestants walked on to the plane.
“This season, you’ll be traveling around the world to compete in all sorts of exotic challenges.” Chris said.
“A free world tour? That doesn’t sound so bad, actually.” Trent said.
“I was hoping you would say that.” Chris laughed. “Because this season, you’ll all have to SING!”
“WHAT?” All 24 contestants said at once.
“Singing? Are you SERIOUS?” Gwen asked, looking shocked.
“100 percent.” Chris grinned. “Every episode, too.”
“No, no, no. I do not dance. I do not sing. I am NOT doing this.” Duncan said, shaking his head.
“Well, suit yourself, but if you don’t sing, you’re out. No million for you.” Chris shrugged.
“I don’t have a problem with it. I’ve always wanted to sing on TV!” Courtney said.
“Of course you wouldn’t.” Gwen rolled her eyes.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Courtney asked, glaring.
“As much as I’d love a cat fight, we kind of have a tour to do, so let’s get going!” Chris said. “Follow me.”
The contestants walked into a room filled with patched up holes and safety harnesses.
“What IS this place?” Eva asked, as a rat crawled on her shoe and she crushed it.
“This is loser central. Formally known as Economy Class. When you lose a challenge, you come here,” The contestants looked at it with disgust
“Heh, my team is never staying here, eh! We’re gonna DOMINATE!” Ezekiel cheered.
“Um, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but you were out first last time.” Justin said to Ezekiel.
“Yeah, but I’ve been preparing so that won’t happen this time! I’m bigger, better, stronger, faster, smarter, and--” Ezekiel began.
“Yeah, we don’t care.” Chris said, shushing the homeschooled boy. “Let’s keep moving!”
The next room they visited was one with gold seats and flight attendants walking around. The contestants all looked shocked.
“When did this show get a budget?” Gwen asked.
“Can I stay here?” DJ said, looking entranced.
“This is the winners section, first class. We spared no expense on this room. If you win the day’s challenge, you get an overnight stay here.” Chris smiled.
Ezekiel sat down in one of the chairs. “Can I claim this chair as mine, yo? Cuz I’m gonna be in this room everyday!”
Alejandro walked over to a seat. “Ladies first.” he said, smoothly, gesturing for someone to sit down. Beth, Katie, Sadie, Leshawna, and Lindsay all raced to sit down. Bridgette began to walk until Geoff glared at her.
“What are you doing?” Geoff asked.
“...Going to the bathroom, babe! Obviously. Why would I do anything else?” Bridgette said, awkwardly chuckling. “Speaking of that, where is it?”
“Just down the hall.” Chris pointed. Bridgette walked to it.
Bridgette (CONF): *begins to fix hair and wash her face, until she looks up* There’s a camera in here? Again? Really?
“Um, Lindsay? Why are you paying attention to him, and not me?” Tyler asked.
“Huh? Sorry Dave, Alejandro is just really nice.” Lindsay said.
“It’s me. Tyler. The guy you hooked up with in season one?” Tyler said.
“No, silly. That’s TYLER. He’s never coming back.” Lindsay said. Tyler sighed.
“Yeah, Leshawna. Why are you hanging out with him and not me?” Harold scoffed.
“Be quiet, beanpole.” Leshawna said. Bridgette walked back in.
“Thanks for not telling me there was a camera in there.” Bridgette complained.
“Oh, right. There are two confessionals this time around. One in the bathroom, and one in the cockpit.” Chris said. “Anyway, let’s keep the tour moving.”
The contestants walked into an area with wooden bleachers and a door leading to the outside of the plane. “This is the elimination ceremony. Anyone who doesn’t get a barf bag of airline issue peanuts will be eliminated, and forced to take the drop of shame, onto the helipad of losers. And you can never come back, ever...unless I feel like it.” Chris said.
“I’m allergic to peanuts, yo. Can you get us some real food? I bet my parents on the farm would give ya some, eh?” Ezekiel said.
Chris glared. “Oh, look, an extra stop on our tour.” he said. He began walking to the back of the plane and opened the door to a room full of rats, spiders, and boxes. “If you follow me, you’ll see our cargo hold, which is perfect for storing annoying homeschooled children.”
“Wait, wha--” Ezekiel began, but before he could finish, Chris threw him in the cargo hold and locked the door.
“Will he survive in there?” Geoff asked.
“Eh, probably.” Chris said.
“OMG! Ezekiel is sooooo trainwreck-y wright now. LMAO, if he gets eliminated first again I will LOL!” Sierra giggled.
“Yeah...whatever that means.” Chris said.
“What was that?” Cody asked.
“That, my friend was, the bell you’ll all grow to know and hate. When you hear that, you’ve gotta start singing. No rehearsals, no lyrics, no nothing. And remember, if you don’t sing, you’re out. And your first song starts...now!” Chris said.
Whole cast sans Gwen and Duncan: We’re flying! And singing! We’re flying and we’re singing!
Sierra/Cody: Come fly with us!
Beth: Come fly with us!
Izzy: We’ve got a lot of crazy moves to bust!
Bridgette/Lindsay: Come fly with us!
Katie/Sadie: Come fly with us!
Alejandro: It’s a pleasure and an honor and a must.
“Dudes, this is messed. You’re singing in a plane.” Duncan rolled his eyes.
Harold: What did you expect? Chris is freaking insane!
“Yeah, but guys, you’re singing on TV!” Gwen said.
Courtney: Haven’t you always wanted to? It can’t just be meeeeeee!
DJ/Leshawna: Come fly with us!
Geoff/Trent: Come fly with us!
“Do you know how to steer this thing?” Heather asked, looking concerned.
“I try.” Chef said.
Ezekiel: They thought they could leave me and depart, but this guy’s got winning in his heart!
Noah: Come fly with us, come die with us!
“Yep, I don’t hate flying, not at all, keep the plane in the air!” Owen said, looking nervous.
Whole cast sans Gwen and Duncan: Come fly with us! Come sing with us!
“No!” Gwen and Duncan said simultaneously.
Chris took out a form from his pocket. “According to this copy of the season three rules….”
Bridgette: All contestants must sing in each show!
Courtney: Duncan do it! Let’s go!
Trent: Gwen, sing it! Don’t go!
Gwen: *sighs* Come fly with us! Come fly with us! Come and fly with us!
“Duncan, please?” Courtney pleaded.
Duncan: *sighs* This suuuuuuucks!
Whole cast: Yeah!
Later, everyone sat in the common area.
“How far do you think we are?” Cody asked.
“Judging by what I can see, I’d say we are--” The plane loudly crashed down to the ground. “...landing.”
Everyone except Ezekiel stood outside. “Why is it so hot?” Leshawna complained.
“I dunno, maybe the fact that we’re in Egypt? Just a guess.” Noah rolled his eyes.
“Do not sass me, turkey.” Leshawna said, glaring.
“Welcome to your first challenge, Pyramid Over-Under!” Chris grinned. “As the name suggests, the challenge is to get through the pyramid either over,” The large pyramid’s full height was shown. “or under.” Bats flew out of the pyramid’s base.
“This challenge decides the teams, and what reward they’ll get for our first challenge!” Chris announced. “Ready, set--”
“WAIT, EH!” A voice cried, everyone gasped.
“You can’t start without me!” Ezekiel yelled.
“How did you get out of the cargo hold?” Chris asked.
“The rats bit through the door, homie! And I’m not losing like this! I’m in it to win it!” Ezekiel said.
“Fine, whatever.” Chris said.
“What’s the challenge?” Ezekiel asked.
“Not telling you. Go!” Chris yelled, and everyone ran except Ezekiel.
“What are we supposed to do?” Ezekiel asked.
“WHAT WAS THAT CHEF? YOU NEEDED THAT THING FIXED ON THE PLANE? I’M ON IT!” Chris ran back onto the plane. Ezekiel sighed and walked after the contestants.
“Let’s go under!” Leshawna said.
“But there are bats!” DJ cried.
“Stop being such a baby!” Leshawna cried and dragged DJ and Harold into the pyramid.
“Let’s go over, babe.” Geoff said to Bridgette.
“Sure.” she smiled back.
“Alejandmoe, can I go with you?” Lindsay asked.
“I want to go with you too, Alejandro!” Sadie said.
“Me too!” Katie agreed.
“Me three!” Beth said.
“We can all go over together.” Alejandro smiled.
“Yay!” All four cheered at once.
Heather (CONF): The new guy is so transparent and fake. He’s obviously playing those girls, and they’re too dumb to see it. I need dumb allies who don’t hate me too, and the only two I could think of were…
“Hey, Cody, Sierra, want to go up the pyramid together?” Heather smiled.
“OMG YES!” Sierra cheered.
“Sure, I guess?” Cody said.
Cody (CONF): I don’t exactly trust Heather, especially since she’s only spoken to me like three times, ever, but hey, no one else was offering. Plus, I get to go with Sierra, who’s hopelessly in love with me! This is gonna be great!
“Come on guys! Team E-scope, yay!” Izzy cheered, grabbing Eva and Noah.
“Can I come?” Owen asked.
“Of course, Big O!” Izzy grinned. Owen ran to the group.
Owen (CONF): Izzy’s great. She can be weird, but she’s great. I could never ask for a better girlfriend! Although Heather IS pretty hot…
“Hey, Justin! Can you tell me what the challenge is, eh?” Ezekiel asked.
“TYLER, TRENT, YOU WANT ME TO GO WITH YOU GUYS? OKAY, SORRY GOTTA GO.” Justin yelled and ran to Tyler and Trent, dragging them to the side of the pyramid.
“And, I guess that means we’re going together then.” Courtney said.
“Yep.” Gwen said.
“I wasn’t talking about you, I was talking about me and Duncan. Find your own partner!” Courtney said.
“Chill out, Court. She can come over with us.” Duncan said.
“Thanks.” Gwen said.
Ezekiel frowned and slowly walked into the pyramid.
Eva, Izzy, Owen, and Noah walked to a crossroads, where there were three doors.
“Which one do we take?” Owen asked.
“Let’s take the mummy one! It looks spooooky!” Izzy said, then backflipped through the door. Owen quickly ran after her. Noah and Eva shrugged and followed.
“Izzy, slow down!” Owen complained.
“I can’t even see her.” Eva complained.
Suddenly, a mummy, draped in bandages, came walking towards Eva, Noah, and Owen.
“Sorry Izzy, I’m not falling for that one! Remember the “bear” from the island. We all know it’s just you.” Owen laughed. The mummy bit his arm.
“AUGH! I’M GONNA TURN INTO A MUMMY NOW! That’s how it works, right?” Owen asked Noah.
“No, that’s zombies.” Noah said.
“Wait, if that’s zombies, how do Vampires work?” Owen asked.
“Vampires don’t turn other people into vampires.” Noah said.
“I’m pretty sure they do.” Owen said.
“SHUT UP!” Eva yelled. “Now let’s go! Come on Izzy!” Eva grabbed the bandages and pulled, but they stayed on.
“Does that mean…” Owen said.
“...that’s actually a…” Eva said.
“MUMMY!” All three yelled in unison and began to run down the corridor.
“Ugh, this is hard.” Justin complained as he, Trent, and Tyler climbed the pyramid.
“Pfft, this is nothing!” Tyler said, flexing. Without his hands on the blocks, he began to tumble down the pyramid until Trent grabbed him.
“Nice one.” Trent chuckled. All three then reached the top.
“How do we get down, exactly?” Justin asked.
“Um…” Trent said. “Didn’t really think of that one…”
“EXTREME!” Tyler began to run down the pyramid, but immediately slipped and began tumbling down, until he reached the bottom.
“WOO! First one down!” Tyler cheered.
“Actually, Trent and Justin climbed down before you. Like normal people.” Chris said. “Anyway, Justin, you’re on team 1. Trent and Tyler, team 2.” All three guys walked onto their mats
Eva, Noah, and Owen continued to run, as the mummy chased them through many different paths.
“Can’t….run…..any…..further…..” Owen said, collapsing. “Remember...me….”
“I’M TIRED OF THIS!” Eva yelled, running up to the mummy and punching it in the face.
“Ow!” Izzy cried. “You’re soooooo lucky I can’t see who did that.”
“It was Izzy this whole time?” Of course.” Noah sighed.
“Yeah, guys. Mummies don’t exist.” Owen said, walking away. Eva rolled her eyes.
“How come I couldn’t take the bandages off?” Eva asked.
“This gauze wrap is super sticky!” Izzy said. “Also probably the glue I put on it.” Eva facepalmed.
Bridgette and Geoff were climbing up the pyramid. “Man, this is hard.” Bridgette complained.
“Yeah, but as long as we’re together, we can overcome anything.” Geoff said.
“You’re so romantic.” Bridgette said, and the two began making out. They soon fell off the pyramid.
“Stop sucking face and start climbing!” Chris yelled.
Alejandro easily climbed up, while Lindsay, Beth, Katie, and Sadie trailed. “Are you ladies alright?” he asked, turning around.
“Peeeeeerfect.” All four said simultaneously.
Alejandro (CONF): I thought it would be harder to convince the girls to do my bidding, but they’re falling for it much harder than I thought they would. Give it a few days, and I’ll have control of the whole game. *smirks*
“Which door do we take, Sierra?” Heather asked.
Heather (Cockpit CONF): As much as I don’t like the new girl, I need to get her trust. I don’t exactly have a plethora of allies on hand.
“Maybe if you weren’t so evil, you would have more!” Chef commented.
“Who asked you?” Heather said.
“I don’t know, let’s let Cody decide!” Sierra said, hugging Cody.
“Uh…the mummy dog one looks the best to me.” Cody said.
“Then that’s the path we take!” Sierra said, running through it. Heather and Cody followed.
Sierra ran straight out to the exit. “Well, that was easy.”
“Sierra, Heather, Cody, you’re the next three to arrive, and you’re on Team 3!” Chris announced.
“Yay! Teamsies!” Sierra hugged Cody.
Cody (CONF): Maybe there is such a thing as a girl caring TOO much….
“Yo? Bros? Homies?” Ezekiel asked, walking alone in the pyramid. He then stepped on the same tile Izzy did, and gauze dropped onto him. “What the foshizzle?”
Bridgette and Geoff stood at the top of the pyramid.
“How exactly do we get down, babe?” Geoff asked Bridgette.
“Hmmm….I’ve got it! I’m a surfer! We can surf!” Bridgette grinned, pulling out a sign at the top of the pyramid.
“Surfing on a road sign? Is that saf--WOAH!” Geoff yelled, as Bridgette grabbed the road sign and put Geoff on it, they then began to surf down the pyramid.
“Woooo! This is awesome!” Geoff cheered as they reached the ground.
“Bridgette, team 1! Geoff, team 2” Chris announced.
“We’re on different teams?” Geoff said.
“Don’t worry, we’ll make it through.” Bridgette smiled. The two then began to make out.
“Seriously? I mean, seriously?” Chris said.
“Which path do we take?” DJ asked.
“Scarab beetle, duh.” Harold said, walking through that door.
“I guess he knows better than us.” Leshawna shrugged.
The three walked through the corridor. “So...Leshawna, what do you think of Alejandro? SOMEONE was getting a bit close, considering you do have a boyfriend.”
“We are not dating!” Leshawna said, pushing Harold, causing him to step on a tile that released scarab beetles throught the floor.
“Nice one, Leshawna!” Harold yelled as he ran.
“It’s your fault for saying something that stupid!” Leshawna retorted.
“Can we stop focusing on arguments and start focusing on our LIVES?” DJ said.
All three ran out of the pyramid. “Welcome out! All three of you are on team number 1.” Chris said.
“Alright, let’s get going.” Courtney ordered. “Duncan, you’re leading.”
“You’re letting ME lead?” Duncan asked, incredulously.
“I just want to make sure Gwen doesn’t try any FUNNY business,” Courtney said, looking behind her.
“Yes Courtney, I’m planning to steal your boyfriend! Oh no! Hide him!” Gwen rolled her eyes.
“Don’t be sarcastic to me!” Courtney said. Duncan sighed as the two began to bicker.
“Come on ladies! I believe in you!” Alejandro yelled down to the girls.
“I believe that you’re really hot!” Sadie called.
“I think you’re hotter!” Katie said.
“No I do!” Sadie yelled.
“No, I do!” Katie argued. The two began slapping each other.
“Ladies, I’ll help you a bit.” Alejandro grinned. He grabbed all four and stacked them on top of his shoulders.
“So strong…” Beth sighed, dreamily. Alejandro calmly walked down to the sand and put all four down, as they swooned.
Heather (CONF): Seriously? I knew that all four were complete idiots, but seriously?
“Welcome to the ground! Lindsay, you’re on team 1. Alejandro, you’re on team 2. Beth, Katie, and Sadie, you’re on team 3.” Chris said.
“Is there any order to how these teams are separated?” Alejandro asked.
“Not really. I’m basically doing what I want.” Chris shrugged.
“...Okay then.” Alejandro smiled.
Alejandro (CONF): Really? I work on four different girls, and none of them are on my team? Hmm...this certainly makes my gameplay harder. Well, it can still be arranged, I’m sure I’ll have some strong competitors on my team.
“AAAAAAAAAAAH!” Owen screamed, running out of the pyramid, followed by Eva, Noah, Izzy, and Ezekiel, both dressed as mummies.
“Why are there two mummies with you?” Chris asked.
“One is Izzy, but the other one just started following us!” Noah yelled.
Ezekiel took of the gauze wrapped around his head. “You could have thought to ask me who I was, yo!” he complained.
“Yes, because when I see the undead the first thing I do is ask for their backstory.” Noah rolled his eyes.
“Alright. Owen, Noah, Izzy, you’re on team 2. Zeke and Eva, team 1.” Chris said.
Alejandro (CONF): Seriously? I mean...seriously?
“On team one, cuz I’m number one, yo!” Ezekiel said, smugly.
“Don’t make me lock you in a cargo hold again.” Chris warned.
“At least I can make the finals!” Gwen yelled.
“Yeah, but you couldn’t last past episode seven in the last season!” Courtney yelled.
Duncan’s eye twitched. “ENOUGH!” he shouted, picking up both Gwen and Courtney and throwing them to the bottom of the pyramid as he stomped down.
“Please don’t put them on my team. Pleeeease don’t.” Duncan cried.
“Chill, bro. You’re on team 2. Gwen and Courtney, team 3.” Chris said.
“And that’s everyone! Team 1 is DJ, Ezekiel, Harold, Leshawna, Lindsay, Bridgette, Eva, and Justin. Team 2 is Owen, Izzy, Alejandro, Noah, Tyler, Duncan, Geoff, and Trent. Finally, Team 3 is Gwen, Heather, Courtney, Cody, Sierra, Beth, Katie, and Sadie.” Chris announced. “Now that you have your teams, you get to come up with your own team names!”
“Team Amazon!” Everyone but Cody on Team 1 said.
“Can we get a different name? Like Cody’s Angels?” Cody suggested.
“Heh heh, I like that one.” Chris said, as a pink logo of Cody’s face came on-screen.
“How about Team Victory!” Bridgette suggested.
“Terrible! With a name like Team Victory, everyone knows you’ll be the losing team! It’s basic irony, gosh. A better name would be Team Failure!” Harold said.
“Nice one!” Chris chuckled. A yellow logo of a dirty sock came on-screen.
Team 2 began to suggest names, but no one listened to each others.
“I have an idea. Team Chris!” Chris grinned.
“Hmm, I have a better one. How about Team Chris…” Noah began.
“Love it!” Chris smiled.
“...is Really Really Really Really Lame!” Noah grinned as a blue logo of Chris’s face with an X over it came on screen.
“Well I know which team I like least already.” Chris glared at Noah. “I’d like to insult you further, but looks like we’re out of time! What will happen when our contestants face the Nile? Find out, next time, on Total...Drama...World Toooour!” Chris signed off.
Chapter Two- Walk Like An Egyptian Part 2
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our 24 losers were introduced to the Total Drama Jumbo Jet, and all of it’s fun features. We had a quick musical number before jetting off to Egypt, where our contestants competed in our first challenge of the season, Pyramid Over-Under. Some stumbled down the great gizan landmarks, while some, pyramid forbid, met mummies. Now, we have 3 teams all ready to compete for immunity. Who will win? Who will be the first sent out of the plane? Find out, right here, right now, on Total Drama World Tour!” Chris grinned.
“Can you stop recapping and explain the challenge already?” Courtney asked.
“Fine.” Chris said. “Alright, the second part of today’s challenge is called The Amazing Camel Race. Singular, because only one team is actually getting a camel.” Chris snickered.
“Each team will get a reward that will help them get to the nile before the others. Once there, you must weave a boat out of reeds and race across the river. The first team to do so gets immunity and first class. The second place team will also be immune, while the last place team will be headed on a one way trip to loser class, and one of their members will be the first person kicked off the plane. Got it?” Everyone nodded.
“You never told us what team gets what reward.” Eva said.
“Oh, right, that. Team Chris is really really really really lame, you get the goat!” Chris announced, while Chef brought it on on a leash.
“Awww, cute!” Izzy grinned.
“You think that’s cute?” Noah asked, looking surprised.
“You don’t?” Izzy replied.
“Team Failure, you get a camel.” Chris said, bringing the camel out on a leash.
“What’s OUR reward?” Heather asked.
“You guys get...a stick!” Chris grinned.
“WHAT?” the team all said at once.
“They get a camel, they get a goat, and we get a stick?” Gwen asked, looking angry.
“Each reward has it’s privileges.” Chris said. “You’ll just have to wait and see them.”
“Yes, because a stick will be so useful in a race throughout the desert!” Courtney yelled.
“Maybe we can use it to hit Heather over the head with when she gets annoying.” Gwen said. Courtney chuckled.
Duncan (CONF): Did Courtney just laugh at something GWEN said? Has the apocalypse come early?
“Hey!” Heather cried.
“Um, Chris? Why are there beetles crawling towards us?” Cody asked, as everyone turned around and saw a swarm of scarabs crawling towards them.
“Oh yeah, we kind of set them off in the pyramid. Oops.” Leshawna scratched her head as everyone glared at her, DJ, and Harold.
“Well, you know what they say, the only way to calm angry scarabs down is…” Chris began.
“Really?” Trent said.
“Yep, songs calm down beetles! A statistic not actually proven, but eh. You should probably sing something romantic, it’s their mating season.” Chris advised.
Alejandro: No need to get crazy, it’s loving time alas!
DJ, Trent, Justin, and Tyler: You don’t want to eat us up!
Owen: We’re mostly full of gas, woah!
Gwen, Heather, and Courtney: It’s mating time for scarabs!
Leshawna: So what you waitin on?
Izzy: Just ignore us humans…
All: And make out til the break of dawn!
Alejandro: It’s loving time! (Loving time, loving time)
Beth: Scarab mating season!
Cody: It’s lovin’ time! (Loving time, loving time)
Justin: Scarab mating season!
Harold: It’s loving time! (Loving time, loving time)
Trent: Scarab mating season!
Geoff: It’s loving time!
All: Scarab mating season!
Ezekiel: Seasonal, eh. Wait, no!
The scarabs stopped being calm and began to run towards the contestants, as everyone began screaming.
“Nice one, homeschool!” Duncan yelled.
Team Failure jumped on their camel. “Go!” DJ yelled, and it began to race off.
“How are we all supposed to fit on the goat, exactly?” Justin asked.
“Hmm...hold on, I have an idea.” Alejandro said.
Alejandro (CONF): It’s basic weight distribution. Anyone with a little brawn and an IQ over 120 could figure it out. Thankfully, I have both.
The camera flashed back to Team Chris, who were now perfectly stacked on top of each other.
“Wow, color me impressed.” Noah said, as the goat ran off with all members of the team stacked on top of it.
“What are WE supposed to do? We can’t ride on a stick!” Heather yelled.
“Oh my gosh Sadie, this reminds me of that time where we got lost in the woods and I got voted off!” Katie gasped.
“Oh my gosh that was sooooo sad!” Sadie frowned.
“Stop talking and move it!” Heather ordered, as Cody’s Angels ran away.
Later, they were walking in no real direction. “Does anyone know WHERE we’re going?” Heather asked.
“We should let Cody lead us! He’d be great!” Sierra swooned.
“How about no.” Heather said.
“It’s pretty obvious I should be leading. I’m the only one with C.I.T experience.” Courtney said.
Gwen (CONF): Hey guys, did you know that Courtney was a C.I.T? I had no idea! *glares at camera*
“OMG, I should lead! I’m great with stuff like this!” Katie said.
“Don’t listen to her, she’s totally lying. She’s TERRIBLE at things like this!” Sadie giggled. “You should let ME do it!”
“No I am not! Name one time!” Katie said.
“Um, that time you got us lost in the woods and you got voted off, for starters.” Sadie said.
Katie gasped. “That was your fault!” she yelled at Sadie.
“No!” Sadie cried.
“Um, yeah!” Katie replied.
“Guys, can we calm down?” Beth asked.
“SHUT UP BETH!” All seven members of the team yelled at once.
Beth (CONF): I was hoping I would be on a good team for once! I was stuck on the Gophers with Heather, the Grips lost all the time, and now I’m with Heather again! I can’t catch a break!
“Anyway, can I like, lead! I’ll be the best at it!” Sadie said.
“Please! Like we’re letting one of YOU, lead!” Heather scoffed.
“But I’m much better than Katie!” Sadie moaned. “She’s so irrelevant!”
“WHAT?” Katie yelled back.
“It’s true. I made it farther the first time we played. All people know you as is Sadie’s friend.” Sadie said. Katie gasped and began to snatch the stick out of Katie’s hand. The two wrestled over the object and it snapped in half.
“Oh, it was a divining rod! Those things lead you straight to water!” Cody said.
“Chris did say each reward had it’s advantages! Nice one Cody!” Gwen smiled.
“Does it work while broken?” Heather asked.
“That I don’t know.” Cody said, sheepishly.
“Let’s just find, like, a school supplies store and get some tape! Problem solved!” Sadie smiled.
“WHERE ARE WE SUPPOSED TO FIND A SCHOOL SUPPLIES STORE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT?” Heather yelled.
“Um...the plan didn’t really get that far.” Sadie said. Heather facepalmed.
Courtney (CONF): I used to think Katie and Sadie shared a brain, but I’m starting to think there was no brain in the first place. How have they SURVIVED sixteen years?
“Can this camel go any faster? I’m hot!” Leshawna complained.
“We’re all hot. We’re in the middle of the desert.” Eva said, gruffly.
“I’m really hot.” Justin winked.
“Eh.” All seven members of Team Victory said at once.
Justin (CONF): I don’t understand! Beauty doesn’t just go away! It’s an everlasting thing, right! If i’m not beautiful then...what am I?
“I’m not hot, eh! We’ve got no air conditioning back on the farm, so in the summer, we just had to sweat it out, yo!” Ezekiel commented.
“Did anyone ask, homeschool?” Leshawna grumbled.
“Someone’s grumpy. Why don’t you get ALEJANDRO to console you!” Harold yelled.
“I do not like Alejandro! And even if I did, we’re not dating!” Leshawna yelled.
Leshawna (CONF): Harold is still convinced that we’re together. Boy needs to wake up, and smell the roses. I’m over Alejandro. I mean...Harold. I’m over HAROLD. That’s what I said, right?
“And then, my mom said, he’s not an eggplant, he’s retarded!” Ezekiel said, grinning. Everyone stared at him. “What’s wrong?”
“Well, you see..” DJ began.
“You’re not funny, you’re annoying. Shut up.” Eva said.
“What! I’m hilarious, yo!” Ezekiel said.
“Yeah...um….no…” Bridgette said awkwardly.
“Whatever! Y’all are just a bunch of haters! I’m just me and I’m real! And I’m gonna win the prize, with or without friends.” Ezekiel said.
“You need friends to not get voted out, stupid.” Leshawna rolled her eyes.
Ezekiel (CONF): My team is just a bunch of losers, yo! I know I can beat all of them, easy!
“Alejandro, man, how’d you figure this out?” Trent asked.
“I took advanced physics, which helped me figure out how to get us all riding comfortably.” Alejandro grinned.
Trent (CONF): Alejandro...dude’s awesome. He knows everything AND is super strong. He’s like our teams secret weapon.
“Yeah, Al, this is great!” Owen grinned.
“It’s awesome, Al!” Geoff grinned.
Alejandro (CONF): My name is ALEJANDRO. Not Al, as these gente incompetente refer to me by. Hmm, the ones who call me Al may just be my first victims. *grins*
Geoff sighed. “What’s wrong, bro?” Tyler asked.
“I miss Bridgette.” Geoff said.
“Yes, because it’s not like you’re on the same plane or anything.” Noah said.
“Just...her blonde hair, gettin’ to make out, everything.” Geoff frowned.
“Didn’t you guys literally make out an hour ago, back at the pyramid?” Noah asked.
“Man, I hear ya. I miss Lindsay too, even though I don’t think she knows who I am.” Tyler scratched his head.
“Wasn’t Bridgette why you lost last time? I know Gwen was why I lost. Maybe it’s a good thing you aren’t on the same team.” Trent said, comfortingly.
“Yeah...you’re right! Thanks man!” Geoff smiled.
Geoff (CONF): Trent is right! I love Bridge, but I gotta keep my head in the game! No more first boot for this dude!
Chris looked out in the distance on the other side of the Nile. “Well, I think I see the first team. It looks like…” The team became more visible. “...Cody’s Angels? Didn’t see that one coming.”
Cody’s Angels looked shocked. “How did you get us here?” Courtney asked.
“Well, I was looking for a school supplies store, and then…” Sadie said.
“What’s the next part of the challenge?” Gwen asked.
“Y’all have to weave a boat out of reeds!” Chris said.
“Who even knows how to do that?” Heather rolled her eyes.
“I do!” Sierra grinned. “Learned it in an Arts-and-Crafts class!”
Heather (Cockpit CONF): So super fan IS useful for something! I might have to keep her around for a bit
“Someone’s a bit controlling.” Chef muttered.
“Ugh! You’re just lucky I don’t want to do confessionals in the toilet!” Heather yelled.
“Okay, so, everyone collect the reeds, and Sierra can weave them!” Sadie grinned.
“Um, I thought I was the leader!” Heather said.
“It’s obvious I should be the leader!” Courtney said.
“If we’re voting for leader, I vote for Sadie!” Katie grinned. Both squealed together.
“I vote for Heather, my new BFF!” Sierra cheered.
“I guess I do too?” Cody shrugged
“I want Sadie as leader! She’s the nicest.” Beth smiled. Both Heather and Courtney scoffed.
“Can I abstain?” Gwen asked.
Gwen (CONF): My choices are a terrible person, a stupid person, and Courtney. I can’t believe I did this but…
“I guess I vote for Courtney.” Gwen shrugged.
“Well, we’re tied. What NOW?” Heather asked.
“Get overtaken by Team Chris?” Chris suggested, as the all-male and Izzy team arrived.
“Nice one, ladies.” Duncan chuckled.
“Get bent!” Heather yelled.
“Hey! That’s my BOYFRIEND you’re talking to!” Courtney said to Heather, who scoffed.
“What’s the challenge?” Duncan asked.
“Weave a boat out of reeds.” Chris called from the other side of the river.
“Who knows how to do that?” Duncan rolled his eyes.
“Oh, I do!” Trent grinned. “I took an Arts-and-Crafts class.”
Duncan began to laugh hysterically. “Okay, dork-zilla.”
Trent (CONF): It was good for college credit!
Team Failure rode up on their camel to the other teams. “Team Failure, nice job living up to your name. You’ve got to weave a boat out of reeds.” Chris announced.
“Ooooh! Leshawna has done a weave or two, I GOT this.” Leshawna said, running over to the reeds.
“I am leader!” Heather yelled.
“No, I am!” Courtney replied.
“It should be me!” Sadie cried.
“Um...I’m done.” Sierra said, as the team turned around and saw a finished boat. “I call it the S.S Cody.” Sierra said, dreamily.
Sierra (CONF): I could get involved in the power struggle, but it’s a pretty bad move. I’m only supporting Heather because we’re aligned. People think I’m just some Cody obsessed girl, and I soooooo am, but there’s a brain in here. *points to head*
“Finished!” Trent announced, grinning.
“Good job, compadre! Let us go!” Alejandro said, as Team Chris ran to the boat.
“I’m done, let’s go!” Leshawna announced as Team Failure ran to their boat.
“Oh, did I forget? You have to bring your items onto the boat with you!” Chris announced.
“WHAT?” Team Failure and Team Chris said. Cody took the broken stick out of his pocket and Cody’s Angels snickered.
“Don’t worry, I speak goat! Baa, baa, black sheep!” Izzy said. Noah facepalmed.
“Get back on the boat!” Alejandro said, carrying the goat in his arms.
“Come on camel!” Ezekiel yelled.
“You have to be patient with it. Come on, little girl. I think I’ll call you Callie.” DJ smiled, petting the camel as it walked into their boat. Chris threw a megaphone at it.
“What was that for?” DJ asked, shocked.
“A rampaging camel will get ratings up.” Chris winked as Callie began to stomp around on Team Failure’s boat.
“Come on, let’s go!” Bridgette called as everyone ran back to the boat.
“And just for good measure…” Chris said.
“REALLY?” Everyone minus Courtney said at once.
“This one’s a REPRISE. Since Zeke decided to ruin the first one.” Chris said, as everyone glared at the homeschooled boy.
Alejandro: Mm, mm. Crocodile amigos, what you swarming for?
Courtney: We don’t mean to hurt you!
Gwen: Please let us reach the shore!
Camel: *honks twice*
Lindsay: These crocs are getting kill-y!
Harold: Just bop on the nose! I learned it muskrat boys, it vanquishes all foes!
Ezekiel: *Cody’s Angels and Team Chris’ boats pass Team Failure’s* No!
Geoff: It’s rowin time!
Everyone: Vanquishing, vanquishing!
Trent: Crocodile season!
DJ: It’s rowin time!
Everyone: Crocodiles, crocodiles!
Justin: *crocodiles bite off part of Team Failure’s boat* Tell me we’re not sinking!
Cody: Yeah, it’s rowin time!
Everyone: Sinkin in, sinkin in!
Beth: Crocodile season!
Eva: It’s rowin time!
Everyone: Rowin time, rowin’ tiiiiime.
Sierra: Til Team Cody…
Cody’s Angels: wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiins, yeah!
“Team Cody takes it!” Chris announced. Team Chris then raced up the dune to Chris. “Team Chris is Really, Really, Really, Really Lame,” Noah snickered. “is in second! Meaning Team Failure is going to elimination.” Team Failure got onto land.
“Should I tell him about the broken stick?” Katie asked, holding a half of the stick up.
“Hold on, you broke the divining rod? Wow. Guess Team Chris takes the win, and Team Failure takes second place!” Chris grinned.
“WHAT?” Heather shrieked. “That wasn’t even in the rules!”
“It’s kind of implied. Did they break their camel, or goat?” Chris asked.
“That’s unfair! You can’t even break a camel!” Heather said.
“Whatever. All I know is Cody’s Angels are going to elimination. Where one of you, is gone.” Chris grinned.
“So, you’re breaking up with me?” Bridgette asked.
“No, just saying we should keep our distance, so we can both stay in the game1’ Geoff said, holding Bridgette’s hand.
“‘Keep our distance’? What’s that supposed to mean!” Bridgette said.
“Uh…” Geoff muttered.
“Ugh!” Bridgette stormed off.
Geoff (CONF): That didn’t exactly go how I wanted it to…
“Alright, tonight, vote for either Katie or Sadie.” Heather ordered Cody and Sierra.
“Why?” Cody asked.
“Because they broke our only chance of winning!” Heather threw her arms in the air.
“I think Cody should decide!” Sierra grinned.
“Yeah! I’m the man on this team! I need to start getting some respect!” Cody said, flexing. “And maybe we’ll just vote for you!” Cody and Sierra walked away.
Cody’s Angels sat in elimination. “Welcome to the Barf Bag ceremony, losers! Inside, stamp the passport of the person you want eliminated. The person with the most votes takes the Drop of Shame.” Chris grinned.
Heather (CONF): There’s only room for one leader around here. *stamps Sadie’s passport*
Gwen (CONF): At least Sadie led us to the nile. *stamps Katie’s passport*
Katie: (CONF) Meanie! *stamps Heather’s passport*
“The votes are in.” Chris said. “And barf bags go to Gwen, Cody, Sierra, and Beth.” Chris threw barf bags to the four.
“Surprisingly Courtney.” Chris said.
“What do you mean surprisingly?” Courtney said, catching her barf bag.
“Our bottom three everyone!” Chris chuckled. “Katie, Sadie, you messed up the challenge. Heather, you’re just unpleasant. Sadie’s safe, and so is…
...Heather! Katie, you’re out” Chris said. Katie frowned.
“Out early again? This is so unfair!” Katie sobbed.
“OMG, no, Katie!” Sadie cried, hugging the thin girl.
“It’ll be okay. Win this for us. We’ll always be BFFFL’s!” Katie said, holding Sadie’s shoulders.
“I’ll miss you!” Sadie cried.
“I’ll miss you more!” Katie cried back.
“Okay, okay, we get it, you’re friends, go.” Chris said, handing Katie a parachute and opening the door.
“Bye!” Katie said, as she jumped out of the plane.
“And that’s one down, twenty three to go! Who will go home next? Find out, next time, on Total….Drama...Woooooorld Tour!” Chris signed off.
Chapter Three- Super Happy Crazy Fun Time In Japan
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our 3 teams continued their visit to the lovely land of Egypt! We had a not-so-amazing race through the desert, and had a croc of a trip across the Nile. Team Cody’s arguing, and Katie and Sadie’s stupidity lost them the challenge. In the end Team Cody ended up booting Katie, leaving Sadie without a BFF. Will Sadie jump out of the plane on her own? Will Team Cody end up throwing Heather out of the plane? And who won’t be over the moon in the land of the rising sun? Find out, right here, right now, on Total...Drama...World...Tour!”
Cody’s Angels and Team Failure sat in economy class, upset. Water leaked onto Gwen’s head.
“Ugh! Can we win the next challenge? This sucks!” Gwen complained.
“It’s not like we DECIDED to lose, Gwen.” Heather rolled her eyes.
“Attention passengers! We’ll be landing in our next location, in about 25 minutes. In flight breakfast will be served...to those in first class. For y’all in economy class, there are some rats back there.” Chris chuckled and turned off the PA.
“No food? We’re hungry!” Leshawna yelled.
“At least we’re landing soon. Where are we?” Gwen asked.
“Given the about 13 hour flight time, I’d say it’s likely our next location is a northeast asian country.” Harold informed.
“It was rhetorical.” Gwen answered.
“Well, excuuuuuuse me! GOSH!” Harold scoffed.
Harold (CONF): I’m underappreciated on this show. My mad skills could be used so much more then they are. I mean, who else here can speak Zulu? Not Alejandro, that’s for sure! What does Leshawna see in that guy?
Later, 22 of the 23 contestants stood in the common area, with Chris in front of them. Where’s Izabelle?” Lindsay asked.
“She kept annoying us in first class last night, and then this morning she was gone.” Duncan said.
“Huh, weird. Anyway, contestants--” Chris began.
“Abadlali, in Zulu.” Harold interjected.
“Okay, today we’ll be visiting the breathtaking land--”
“Izwe, in Zulu.” Harold interrupted.
“Isn’t Zulu that place where you can watch TV shows? I love that site!” Lindsay grinned.
“No, that’s Hu-” Leshawna tried to correct, until she was knocked down by Izzy, who ran barreling in.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Izzy screamed. She then opened the plane door and jumped out of it, also causing the remaining contestants and Chris to get sucked out of it.
“WHAT WAS THAT FOR?” Chris asked.
“I had to get away from the fire in the cargo hold! “ Izzy yelled.
“Why was there a fire in the cargo hold?” Chris asked.
“Don’t question it!” Izzy screamed. The plane flew down, and Chef grabbed Chris through the door.
“Alright, now that I’m safe. Let’s make this a bit more interesting!” Chris grinned
The contestants all groaned.
“I hate you so much.” Noah said.
“I know.” Chris smiled.
Courtney: We’re singing as we’re falling!
Heather: While some are cannonballing!
Alejandro: Our lives begin to flash before our eyes.
Owen and Noah: We might just go kablooey!
Harold and Tyler: Get smushed and become chewy.
All: But there’s still so much to do before we diiie!
Cody: Billards champion!
DJ: Make it home to see my momma!
Sierra: Marry Cody!
Bridgette: Catch a barrel!!
Lindsay: Be an actress in a drama!
Courtney: Corporate lawyer!
Gwen: Prom destroyer!
Harold: Be a ninja with throwing stars!
Alejandro: Lion tamer!
Owen: New food namer!
Tyler: Repairment for the paralell bars!
Noah: But first we must cease dropping.
Eva: Our goal here would be stopping.
Izzy: Before we smash into the ground from the sky!
Beth: Crushed into little pieces!
Sadie: Heads merged with our feetses!
Justin: That would really suck and here’s why!
Geoff: We’d like to keep on living!
Trent: So Chris, I hope you’re giving…
Sierra: Some wings!
Courtney: A jetpack!
Gwen: A rift in time!
Tyler: A trampoline!
Izzy: Springy shoes!
Alejandro: Rocket boots!
Lindsay: Flying squirrel!
Leshawna: Bubble bath!
Lindsay: I change to bubbles, too!
Owen: Pizza! No! Chips and some dip will do!
All: Cause there’s still so much to do before we die! Yeah, we said it! There’s still so much to do, there’s still so much to do, there’s still so much to do before we die, yeah!
The contestants all shrieked as they got closer and closer to the ground. Suddenly, a giant bowl of pudding came out of nowhere and the contestants landed in it.
“Um...why?” Bridgette said, lifting her arm as pudding dripped off of it.
“We’re in Japan! Randomness is the specialty!” Chris grinned.
“That’s deeply racist.” Heather muttered.
“Now wipe off that pudding and meet me in the game show arena in 10!” Chris walked off.
Later, the 23 contestants stood at the game show arena. “Welcome to your first challenge today, Super Human Pinball Smash! Sounds fun, right?” Chris asked.
“Sounds DANGEROUS.” Courtney said.
“Um, of course it’s going to be dangerous, do you even know Chris? Don’t be a noob.” Sierra snorted. Courtney awkwardly stared.
“In this challenge, one member from each team will have to be forced in a pinball with a dangerous animal. The goal is to stay in the pinball game without falling out for the longest. Winner gets an advantage in part 2, second gets a slightly smaller advantage, third gets jack. Now- pick your contestant!” Chris grinned.
“Courtney will do it!” Heather smiled and pushed Courtney in front of the whole team.
“What? Well, as the LEADER, I guess I have to take one for the te-” Courtney began.
“Since when are you the leader?” Sadie asked.
“Um, since FOREVER.” Courtney said, and glared at Sadie.
Courtney (CONF): The fact that people are doubting that I should be leader is ridiculous! I mean, would they really rather Heather? Or Sadie? I’m obviously the best candidate here.
“Ooh! Ooh! Can I go?” Lindsay asked. “I love pinball, I always get strikes!”
“Lindsay, that’s...bowling.” Eva said.
“No, I’m pretty sure it’s pinball.” Lindsay said.
Justin (CONF): How that girl made it to 16 is one of the great mysteries of our time.
As the two bickered, Geoff walked over to Bridgette. “Hey, Bridge.” Geoff smiled.
Bridgette scoffed. “I thought you weren’t talking to me!”
“Come on babe, I just don’t want us to get eliminated for being too close like last time! I still like you, I just need you to leave me alone and not associate with me.” Geoff smiled.
“Ugh!” Bridgette said, and turned her back on him.
“Bridgette!” Geoff cried.
“Hey! I’m hosting a challenge over here! If you would stop talking for two seconds.” Chris fake coughed. “Geoff and Bridgette.”
“They were just discussing how Geoff’s going to perform in this challenge, because he’s Team Chris’s volunteer!” Alejandro smiled, and pushed Geoff in front of the team.
Alejandro (CONF): If Geoff wins, the team gets an advantage. If Geoff loses, we know who we’re getting rid of tonight. It’s genius, really.
“Alright, it’s time to release the beasts!” Chris yelled dramatically. Everyone stood awkwardly.
“I SAID, it’s time to release the beasts!” Chris said, sounding more annoyed.
“Oh!” Chef ran into the plane and came out with a cage that he quickly unlocked.
“Alright, welcome...the panda bears!” Chris announced, as the pandas walked out of the cage.
“You do know pandas live in CHINA, right?” Heather asked.
“China, Japan, tomato, tomahto!” Chris said.
“You know they’re two completely different countries, right?” Noah asked.
“WhatEVER. You people are so specific about everything.” Chris rolled his eyes.”Anyway, each runner gets a panda.” Chris threw the pandas to Courtney, Lindsay, and Geoff.
“Aww, so cute!” DJ squealed, and grabbed a panda, who he cuddled with.
“Um, you’re not doing the challenge, Lindsay is.” Chris said, taking the panda out of DJ’s hands and throwing at Lindsay.
“Ow!” Lindsay cried.
“But...panda….” DJ pouted.
“Alright, can we start the challenge already?” Courtney asked.
“Fine, pushy.” Chris rolled his eyes. “Enter the pinballs!”
Courtney, Lindsay, and Geoff walked into the orbs. “Oh my god, I don’t think I can do this! I totally forgot I was homophobic!” Lindsay gasped.
“You mean...claustrophobic?” Leshawana asked.
“Oh, yeah that!” Lindsay said.
“I’ll do it!” DJ grinned.
DJ (CONF): Chris can’t stop me from loving animals. Me and that little panda were destined to be together!
DJ ran into the pinball. “I’m ready!”
“Did I ever approve you doing the challenge? No! Request DENIED. Um...Leshawna, you go.” Chris said.
“Me? Why?” Leshawna asked.
“Uh, because I said so?” Chris glared.
“But...panda…” DJ pouted again.
Chris (CONF): I just didn’t want DJ to get to ride with the panda because it would make him happy. And happy people do not make good TV.
“Ready? Go!” Chris banged a gong.
“OUT OF MY WAY!” Courtney shrieked, pushing Leshawna and Geoff out of the way.
“COURTNEY, BE CAREFUL! YOU MIGHT HURT A PANDA!” DJ screamed.
“Do I look like I care!” Courtney yelled back.
DJ (CONF): How can she not care about the well-being of something so cuddly! It’s evil!
“Go LESHAWNA.” Bridgette cheered, glaring at Geoff.
“Why isn’t she cheering for me….” Geoff muttered. “I mean, THANK GOD BRIDGETTE ISN’T SUPPORTING ME BECAUSE SHE’S ANNOYING AND SMELLS LIKE FISH!”
Bridgette (CONF): Okay, SO not cool.
“This panda is getting under my feet!” Leshawna yelled.
“Hold it like it’s a baby!” DJ advised.
“Dude, why do you know so much about pandas?” Justin questioned.
Geoff’s ball was about to hit a bumper, and get points. “Alright!” he cheered.
“Not on my watch!” Courtney yelled and shoved Geoff out of the way, getting the points for herself.
“Time’s up!” Chris yelled, and all three balls ejected.
“Courtney, your incredibly agressive personality was finally good for something! You win it for Cody. Leshawna gets second place for Failure, and Chris loses it thanks to Geoff.” Chris said.
“YES!” Courtney cheered.
“Aww….” Geoff frowned.
“It’s okay, dude. You tried your best.” Trent patted Geoff on the back.
“Um, where are MY congratulations? I actually won!” Courtney cried.
“Courtney, we win and lose as a team. Don’t be so selfish.” Heather smiled as Courtney growled.
Courtney (CONF): HEATHER lecturing me about selfish? What a joke! If we lose today, there’s one person going home, and it ain’t me!
“Alright teams, ready for part 2 of today’s challenge?” Chris asked.
“Not particularly.” Noah replied.
“Remember when you were an irrelevant third boot? I miss those days. Anyway, if there’s one popular thing in Japan besides video games and rice--” Chris began.
“Okay, even I thought that one was messed up.” Eva said.
“As I was SAYING, third in popularity here is weird commercials! They are all over the place in this country, and it will be your job for your next challenge to CREATE one!” Chris announced.
“How exactly do you make a commercial with nothing to advertise?” Gwen asked.
“Um, of COURSE you have something to advertise. Duh. It’s Chef’s new food, Total Drama Yum-Yum Happy Go-Time Candy Fish Tails!” Chris announced.
“Sounds delicious!” Alejandro smiled.
Alejandro (CONF): (takes a bite) Delicious….*vomits*
“Who wants to eat candy fish tails?” Trent asked.
“Who wants to eat anything made by Chris?” Noah retorted.
“Me!” Owen cheered and ate a whole bag.
“See! OWEN likes them!” Chris scoffed.
“I’m not sure that’s the most glowing endorsement of a product.” Gwen muttered.
“ANYWAY, Team Cody gets first crack at the prop room, so….have fun with that.” Chris said. “Go, or whatever.” Gwen picked up two hockey masks. “Awesome. We should do a horror themed commercial!” Gwen suggested.
“Of course, YOU want to. Weird goth girl.” Heather scoffed.
“What’s YOUR idea then, Heather!” Gwen glared.
“True genius takes TIME! You can’t RUSH IT, Gwen.” Heather said, and sat down.
“Um, we have to be dazzling and epic, just like Tokyo! Sparkling lights, vibrant colors!” Courtney picked up two firecrackers.
“OMG, I totally agree! You should let me direct. Graphic design is my passion!” Sierra squealed.
“I thought Cody was your passion?” Beth asked.
“He’s not my passion.” Sierra said. Cody fistpumped.
Sierra leaned in close to his ear. “He’s my LOVE.”
Cody (CONF): Having a girl obsessed with you looks a lot more fun than it is.
Team Failure walked into the prop room.
“ALRIGHT! I know everything about Japan! I can WIN this for us!” Harold cheered.
“Um, as a model, I’m pretty sure I have more commercial experience than you, Harold.” Justin said.
“That’s true. Justin should direct.” Bridgette said.
“Yay Justin!” Lindsay cheered and clapped.
Harold (CONF): Why do the HOT GUYS always get the positions of power!
Team Chris walked into the prop room.
“Well, this is an interesting selection.” Alejandro said.
“Interesting, meaning sucky?” Noah said.
“Ooh, I have an idea! You guys should like, give me like, all of the bags of fish tails, and then I eat them all, and then I’ll be like, it’s so good!” Owen grinned.
“I’m gonna veto that idea for many different reasons.” Duncan said.
“Japan is really big on like, godzilla stuff. What if we did a monster movie thing?” Trent suggested.
“Excellent idea, my friend!” Alejandro grinned.
“And Big O can be the monster!” Izzy jumped on his back.
“Okay, what if instead of people, the monster ate all the bags of candy fish tails because the monster is really hungry.” Owen chuckled. The rest of his team glared at him.
Team Cody sat in the recording studio.
“Alright! Everyone grab a firecracker!” Courtney said.
“I don’t get this commercial! Why is it just explosions. I would so not shop here after seeing this.” Sadie shook her head.
“Maybe because it ISN’T FOR A SHOPPING MALL, Sadie.” Courtney rolled her eyes.
Sadie(CONF): I used to feel bad that I hit Courtney in the head with an apple. Now, I want to do it again!
Courtney (CONF): Last time when Katie left, Sadie kept quiet. I miss THAT Sadie, because this one is annoying!
“Where is the bag of fish tails?” Courtney asked.
“I’ve got it!” Beth said, and ran over to Courtney but tripped and spilled them all “....oops.”
“UGH!” Courtney cried.
Courtney (CONF): I thought, hey maybe I’ll get a COMPETENT team this time. Nope!
Beth (CONF): Courtney getting mad is scary, but it’s also kinda funny. Her face gets all red and puffs up…I hope I don’t get voted off for saying that.
“We’re filming in five! Get ready!” Courtney yelled.
“Okay, who died and made HER queen?” Heather said to Cody and Sierra.
“I know right? Like, I would obviously be a better director. My website gets 10,000 hits daily!” Sierra said.
“I say, we form an alliance and take her down.” Heather smiled.
“OMG, I am sooooooo in!” Sierra grinned.
“Great. Let’s do it.” Heather smiled.
Cody (CONF): Making a deal with Heather and Sierra is kind of like making a deal with the devil. And a deal with the purple haired total drama obsessed psycho who won’t leave you alone.
Team Failure was in their recording process. Justin sat on a lawn chair in his boxers with Leshawna, Bridgette, Lindsay, and DJ all in their underwear fanning him.
“Why is this our video! Where’s the culture? The respect? Japan isn’t about shirtless guys in their underwear!” Harold cried
“Hey, look. Hotness is universal. Which means I’m hot worldwide.” Justin said.
“I mean, you’re only like a 7/10.” Leshawna said.
“On a good day.” Lindsay added.
Justin (CONF): Seven out of 10. Seven out of 10? I’m a male model! I’m a ten out of ten.Hell, I’m an eleven out of 10! You have to invent a whole new ranking scale for me, that’s how hot I am!
“And why am I not in the commercial?” Eva asked.
“Yeah, dawg! Or me?” Ezekiel asked.
“Well, I suppose there’s a market for bodybuilding girls...Eva, come join us. Hard pass on Ezekiel and Harold, though.” Justin said.
Harold (CONF): First Alejandro, now Justin...why can’t I ever beat the hot guys for something! GOSH!
Owen sat in his monster costume while Team Chris edited.
“Is it done? Do we have to film another take? Please say no!” Owen pleaded.
“I think we’re good.” Trent said. The team sans Geoff cheered and Owen began throwing off parts of the monster costume.
Alejandro took Geoff aside. “I’ve noticed you seem quite upset over Bridgette.”
“Yeah, dude….I really like her, but it’s a game, and I can’t let her distract me.” Geoff sighed.
“That seems logical to me. Just tell her that and you’ll be fine.” Alejandro smiled and patted Geoff on the back.
Alejandro (CONF): Cause a rift between Geoff and Bridgette...check. It’s almost too easy.
Duncan brought out a bag of fish tails and a bottle of soda. “For making it through the day, buddy. This one’s for you.” The rest of the team walked away as Owen licked his lips.
“Mmm....” he said.
Later, all three teams stood in front of a large TV screen. “It’s time to judge the commercials! Team Cody, you’re first.”
Courtney put the video in. Heather appeared on screen talking to Gwen. “Have you ever had a Total Drama Yum-Yum Happy Go-Time Candy Fish Tail?” she said, woodenly. “Try one!” she handed Gwen one. Gwen took a bite.
“It’s an EXPLOSION in my mouth!” Gwen yelled, as Courtney, Cody, Sierra, Beth, and Sadie appeared on screen with firecrackers, dancing.
“O….kay. That was...a commercial.” Chris said. “Team Failure?”
“I apologize. I had no input, and thus are commercial has not really honored Ja-” Harold began.
“Just put in the video!” Leshawna yelled.
“Fine!” Harold shoved the video in and Justin appeared in his underwear with DJ, Leshawna, Eva, Lindsay, and Bridgette fanning.
“I’m hot.” Justin said. “You know what else is hot? The hottest new snacks on the market, Total Drama Yum-Yum Happy Go-Time Candy Fish Tails.” Justin ate one seductively. “Get em before it’s too late.”
“Wow, nice abs dude.” Chris said.
“Tha--” Justin began.
“DJ, you must really be working out huh?” Geoff asked.
“Looking good, my man!” Duncan said.
Justin (CONF): *screams*
“Alright, let’s see how Team Chris did.” Chris said.
Owen appeared on screen.
“Where’s the monster costume?” Alejandro asked. He drank a whole bottle of soda, and then began to burp. “A-B-C-D-E-F-G…”
“Dios mio!” Alejandro cried.
“Owen! You idiot!” Duncan yelled.
“I didn’t know it would record over it!” Owen said. “I thought it would be funny!”
“Well, this choice is obvious. Team Failure scores first class seats for their hot commercial, Team Cody’s gets them second, and Team Chris is heading to elimination. Where one of you is going to say bye bye. I can’t wait.” Chris grinned.
Geoff walked up to Bridgette. “Babe. I know I’ve been acting weird, but over the past few days this feeling has been building up. I know I need to say something to you.” Geoff said.
“Aw, Geoff! I for-” Bridgette began.
“If we want to make it far, you need to stop being so clingy! The guys on my team are getting suspicious. I’m just saying!” Geoff said.
“Ugh!” Bridgette stomped out.
Bridgette stomped past Alejandro. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Geoff. It’s like he doesn’t even want to be my boyfriend!” Bridgette said, sitting down next to Alejandro.
“Ah, I see. I hope you know that you can come to me whenever, through this tough time in your relationship.” Alejandro said.
“Thanks.” Bridgette smiled.
Alejandro (CONF): Like I said, too easy.
“Dude, Owen’s got to GO. Plain and simple.” Duncan said to Geoff, Trent, Alejandro and Tyler.
“Since when are we friends?” Trent asked.
“We’re not, but I need your vote.” Duncan said.
“Fair enough.” Trent said.
“I agree. Owen is simply…dead weight on the tribe. And dead weight must be eliminated at the first opportunity.” Alejandro smiled.
“Alright, the team is completely against you, for good reason.” Noah said. “Our only chance is to try and get everyone to vote Geoff.”
“Geoff HAS been acting weird…” Owen said.
“We should blow up Alejandro!” Izzy grinned.
“Ignoring the crazy…she has a point. Alejandro is dangerous. And everyone likes him less than Geoff...” Noah smiled evilly.
“Team Chris, your loss today was most certainly one person’s fault. It’s time to vote!” Chris announced.
Noah (CONF): I hope this works. *stamps someone’s passport*
Alejandro (CONF): Goodbye. *stamps Owen’s passport*
“Barfbags tonight go to Izzy, Noah, Duncan, Tyler, and Trent.” Chris threw barfbags to all five.
“Geoff, you’re safe.” Chris threw a barfbag to him.
“Alright!” Geoff cheered.
“Alejandro, Owen. One of you is going home. And the person taking the drop of shame is……..
...Owen, to the surprise of no one!” Chris threw Alejandro his barfbag.
“Awww….” Owen frowned.
“Big O, I’ll miss you” Izzy jumped on his back.
“Sorry, bro.” Trent said.
“It’s okay. Bye guys!” Owen attempted to jump out of the plane, but didn’t fit. He then went sideways, and squeezed through to drop.
“Welp, another one down, 21 more to go. Who will be gone next? Find out next time, on Total...Drama...World Tour!” Chris signed off
Chapter Four- Anything Yukon Do, I Can Do Better
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our 3 teams visited asian sensation, Japan! While everyone wanted to give Harold and his obnoxious knowledge a karate chop, Geoff and Bridgette’s relationship was what really ended up being karate chopped! Ouch! DJ tried to liberate pandas, Justin tried desperately to still be thought of as attractive, and Owen didn’t even have to try to annoy his whole team and get himself the boot! See ya, big O! 22 are left. And today, the interactions are gonna get ICY. Who will race to first place? Find out, right here, right now on Total...Drama...World Tour!”
Team Chris and Team Cody sat in economy class.
“I feel that with Owen gone, this is truly a team of champions.” Alejandro smiled. “No weak links left.”
“Definitely! As a team of dudes--” Tyler began, Izzy was gnawing at his seat. “...and Izzy, we’re not gonna lose to a bunch of chicks! Or Ezekiel’s team!”
“Exactly! I just think that if we are confident and do not betray each other, we could go far in this game. Don’t you agree, Noah?” Alejandro asked.
Noah (CONF): Snakejandro knows I voted for him last episode. The guy’s impressive, sure, but I don’t trust him at all. He’s slimy.
Trent was staring at Team Cody, him and Gwen locked eyes for a split second, and both immediately turned away.
Trent (CONF): Gwen being here is….weird, you know. I still care about her a lot, but I don’t think either of us wants to talk to each other. There was a lot of drama and….she hurt me, she really did. It just sucks.
Team Failure sat in first class, getting facials. Harold sighed. “I wish I could enjoy this…” he said.
“And why can’t you, exactly?” Justin asked.
“Because we didn’t earn it! We blatantly misrepresented Japan, and only got through because Chris likes hot girls and DJ!” Harold yelled.
“Are you insinuating that I was not part of that commercial’s success? I am obviously the hottest one here!” Justin retorted.
“Not really. Your chin is way too big, for one.” Harold said.
Justin (CONF): *crying* And now I’ll need another injection of botox because the tears will bring out my wrinkles! *crying*
The loudspeaker turned on. “We will be landing in the Yukon shortly, but we’re experiencing a biiiiiiiiit of turbulence. Nothing to freak out about, don’t worry.” Chris said as the plane violently shook.
“Oh, my grandma always said the best solution to turbulence was to jump and up and down so it would cancel out the turbulence!” Izzy began bounding from the walls, causing the plane to become much less steady.
Izzy (CONF) My grandma was so smart! I remember my mom saying she was like, delightful. Or maybe she said demented?
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Courtney screamed as Izzy jumped on her face.
Izzy: We visited her in a hospital a few times- maybe she has dementia…
“AAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Alejandro and Geoff shrieked, as Izzy had created a hole in the plane and they were the ones plugging it with their bodies.
Izzy: She was really good at gardening, so maybe my mom was calling her Demeter! I don’t know. I think I was dissecting my pet guinea pig that day and not paying much attention.
“BIT OF AN ICY LANDING HERE, FOLKS!” Chris yelled over the loudspeaker as the plane spun out of control, leading the contestants in loser class to spin around and around. It finally skid to a stop.
“I think that was fun, don’t you guys?” Chris said over the loudspeaker. “Alright, time for your next challenge!”
The 22 remaining contestants stood out in the cold, icy terrain the plane had landed in. “It’s f-f-reezing!” Bridgette complained.
“Don’t worry, muchacha. I can keep you warm.” Alejandro winked.
“H-h-hey I can keep you warm too, eh! I have l-l-like, a hoodie and stuff!” Ezekiel shouted.
Ezekiel (Cockpit CONF): I’ve always had a crush on Bridgette. She’s just...beautiful, ya know? And with us being on the same team and all, it’s time for me to make my move!
Chef laughed uncontrollably. “Oh, were you serious?” he questioned as Ezekiel looked down in shame.
Geoff seethed at Bridgette and Alejandro. “Hey Courtney, are you cold. I can warm you up!” He said and grabbed her in a bear hug.
“You smell like a 2.5 GPA! AND I have a boyfriend! Let go of me!” Courtney cried, escaping the hug.
Geoff (CONF); I just can’t win, man!
“Oh my gosh, I LOVE the cold!” Sadie squealed. “I remember the time me and Katie’s moms wouldn’t let us have a sleepover, so we slept over outside in the middle of winter for like, a week! It was soooo fun. I only remember the first day though, after that we had to go get hippothermia shots! Whatever those are.” she giggled.
“O...kay.” Chris slightly inched away. “Anyway, welcome to the Yukon!”
“Isn’t this a world tour? The Yukon’s still in Canada.” Gwen rolled her eyes.
“Canada is a part of the WORLD, Gwen.” Heather scoffed. “SO culturally insensitive.” Gwen glared at her.
“Well, today’s challenge is called Total Drama Ice Age!” Chris announced. “For the first part of today’s challenge, you’ll have to hop from icy platform to icy platform across the watery straight, all the way to the sleds!” Chef wheeled out 3 sleds.
“Wow, that sled looks fake but it’s real!” Beth admired.
“I made it. Next, one of your team members will have to be the dog to your sled and have to pull it all the way to the finish line! The first two teams to get to the finish line with ALL of their team members win immunity. As for the last team, you’ve got a date with me at elimination tonight...and one of you is going for a fly!” Chris explained. The contestants looked at each other nervously.
“Alright, ready….go!” Chris announced.
“Alright, Team Cody. We need ALL members at the finish line, so the smartest plan is to stick together and--” Courtney was interrupted by her other 6 team members running past her right onto the course.
Courtney (Cockpit CONF): UGH! I try and give these slackers good advice and they all ignore me! Don’t they know I’m the ONLY person here--
“With CIT experience. Even I know that now. You really need to get a new thing, girl.” Chef grumbled.
“A beautiful woman such as yourself shouldn’t have to jump through ice. Here, let me.” Alejandro picked up Bridgette and began jumping across the icy platforms with her.
“Oh, that’s so..polite.” Bridgette blushed.
Bridgette (CONF): What? It was a strictly platonic jump across the ice! There’s absolutely nothing to feel guilty about! ...don’t give me that look, you’re a camera!
“Hey, Bridgette! Wait up, eh!” Ezekiel called out.
Ezekiel (CONF): Bridgette’s all into Alejandro cause he’s manly, but I’m manly too, eh! How many rats has Alejandro eaten?
Izzy flipped from ice platform to ice platform. “This is fun!” she called.
Izzy (CONF): All of the other challenges are boring stuff like “make a commercial”’ and “trek across the long grueling egyptian desert with a goat”, but jumping across things, barreling down anyone in my way? THAT’S why I play Total Drama!
Izzy continued bounding platforms, while Ezekiel called out to Bridgette. “BRIDGETTE! WE SHOULD STICK TOGETHER AS TEAM FAILURE, EH!”
“Yeah, we will! Just...give me a second.” Bridgette assured as she looked in Alejandro’s eyes and smiled.
“OKAY! I’l just...wait.” Ezekiel said sadly, as Izzy bounded into his black, sending him flying all the way to the sleds.
“You’re welcome!” she called.
“Looks like Zeke will be the sled dog for his team!” Chris grinned.
“Oh...great.” he grimaced.
“EXTREME!” Tyler yelled as he began jumping from platform to platform. “This is my chall--OH NO!” He screamed as he slipped and crashed into Lindsay.
“Ouch!” Lindsay exclaimed, and then began to look at the face that just knocked her down. “Hey, you look familiar…” she said.
“Yeah! It’s me, Tyler!” Tyler grinned looking towards Lindsay hopefully.
“Oh yeah, you’re one of my tennis coaches right? So weird seeing you here! Bye!” Lindsay said, jumping to the next platform.
Tyler (CONF): I think the game is going pretty good for me! I mean, the girl I love doesn’t know who I am and I’ve sustained multiple threatening injuries, but...other than that it’s been good!
Tyler fell onto the sled “Ugh…” he groaned.
“Looks like Tyler gets to be the Team Chris dog.” Chris snickered. “Poetic, in a way.”
Izzy jumped on the sled. “Shotgun!” she said. “Let’s go Tyler! We’re gonna leave the other teams in our dust!”
“Shouldn’t we wait for everyone els--” Tyler began.
“Ooh, what do these things do?” Izzy questioned, grabbing the reins, and then striking Tyler with them. “Haha, this is fun! Let’s go!” she ordered, as Tyler began running.
Cody slid on the ice. “Sierra, a little help here?” he called, trying not flop into the water.
“I’M COMING, CODYKINS!” Sierra screeched while bounding an inhuman length to catch him. “You shouldn’t be dealing with these platforms. Here you go!” she said, as she picked him up and threw him to the sled.
“Th-thanks…” Cody muttered.
Cody (CONF): At least my stalker helps me in challenges!
“Cody, you get to be the dog of your team!” Chris announced.
“What? Me? But...I’m weak! I can’t pull a whole team!” Cody cried.
“Dude, you’re on a team full of girls. If you can’t pull all of them, that’s on you.” Chris shrugged.
Alejandro, carrying Bridgette jumps to the end platform. “Alright, I really should go.” Bridgette said, getting out of his arms.
“Why? Just come with Team Chris. This could be the start of a great alliance between two teams.” Alejandro smiled.
“Well..I guess that’s true…” Bridgette hesitated
Bridgette (Cockpit CONF): Okay, maybe it was a moment of weakness...or maybe it was a great strategic move!
“It was a moment of weakness.” Chef commented. Bridgette sighed.
Alejandro (CONF): I thought it would be harder to break up Bridgette and Geoff, but it doesn’t seem so whatsoever. They were the couple that posed the biggest threat to me- both are nice and likable, and would waltz to the end without any divine intervention. Thankfully, I’m here. *winks* The only thing I’m scared about is Geoff. He’s hard to read- his mind is an enigma.
Geoff sat in the sled with Trent. “All I’m saying is, beer pong should TOTALLY be an olympic sport!”
“Bridgette, you ready to go, yo?” Ezekiel asked.
“Actually, I’m gonna go with Alejandro. I’ll meet up with you guys later.” Bridgette smiled, and walked off with Alejandro.
“But---I---what?” Ezekiel questioned.
Ezekiel (CONF): She’s abandoning her team now? What the foshizzle?
“Ha, is this the best you’ve got Chris?” Duncan asked, jumping from platform to platform with little effort. “I’ve had detentions harder than this!”
‘Fire in the hole!” Chris yelled as he loaded a gigantic chunk of ice into a cannon and shot it at Duncan, smashing him in the back.
“And this piece of ice reminds me of the time me and Katie drank that drink….and THIS piece of ice reminds me of--” Sadie began, but Duncan flew straight into her, sending them both to the end.
“Duncan, your team is already gone.” Chris said. “As for Sadie, you and Cody may now depart”
“Thanks for the help.” he grumbled and began running to find them.
“OMG this is going to be so fun!” Sadie squealed. “We can talk about boys, and shopping, and--” Sadie continued.
Cody (CONF): This is gonna be a loooooong trip.
Eva ran across the ice, stonefaced. “She’s not even jumping!” Sierra cried, as she reached the ending platform. “OMG, I HAVE to go find Codykins!” she giggled.
Eva reached the ending platform as well. “HURRY UP!” she screamed at DJ, Harold, Leshawna, Lindsay, and Justin, all of whom were clutching to one wayward piece of ice and hoping for the best. She looked at Ezekiel. “Move it or lose it, homeschool! There is a CHALLENGE happening currently, you know!”
Eva (CONF): I’m not trying to say my team sucks...but...okay, yes I am trying to say my team sucks.
Gwen faceplanted on the ending platform. “Ugh!” she cried.
Gwen (CONF): Remember back when the challenges were “put on a talent show”, “stay awake”, not “risk getting pnuemonia for a million dollars”?
She began stomping off to find her team while Lindsay landed on the ending platform. “Where’d my team go?” she questioned. “Oh well, Ii guess I’ll go to them!” Lindsay grinned, while walking in the complete opposite direction than everyone else went.
On the Team Chris sled, many things were happening at once. “I spy with my little eye…..something red!” Izzy called
“There’s nothing red here?” Duncan said before Izzy punched him in the face.
“I spied pain!” Izzy grinned.
“HOW IS THAT RED?” Duncan cried from the floor of the sled.
“Your arms are so...strong.” Bridgette blushed.
“Great for carrying a lovely lady...such as yourself.” Alejandro purred.
“Hey, loser jock, let’s get a move on.” Duncan said, whipping Tyler.
Tyler (CONF): You know what? I’ve had to deal with seeing Alejandro and Bridgette flirt their butts off, and it makes me so angry! The thought of Lindsay going with someone else makes my blood boil! Although that might be the head wound…
Tyler stopped the sled and turned around. “What are you DOING?” Duncan questioned.
“I’M FINDING LINDSAY!” Tyler heroically stated and began running in the opposite direction.
The Team Cody sled was somehow even less fun. “And so then she was like OMG, and I was like OMG!” Sadie babbled.
“Cody, can we--” Gwen began.
“SHHHHHHHHHH!” Sierra shushed right into Gwen’s face. “He’s concentrating.
Gwen (CONF): You know, I thought without Heather and Courtney my team would be tolerable...nope! Still awful!
Sierra (CONF): I totally see Gwen’s game. She’s ALWAYS talking to Cody- that hussy wants my man! But my Codykins is ALL mine! She can go back to TRENT if she wants. *sticks out tounge*
Leshawna walked to the Team Failure sled and fell down “Ooh lord, I am TIRED” she groaned.
“Where is the rest of our team?” Eva questioned angrily.
“DJ found a seal and is tending to it, Harold and Justin are arguing Bridgette’s still chatting up Alejandro, and I have no clue where Lindsay is.” Leshawna sighed.
Eva grabbed a piece of the ice and bit into it. Ezekiel and Leshawna stared at her. “It’s stress relief.” Eva growled.
Alejandro and Bridgette jumped off the Team Chris sled. “We wish you luck in your quest to find Lindsay, but we have some...business to attend to.” Alejandro said, stepping off with Bridgette.
“Why did we get off?” Bridgette asked
“Because, I wanted to talk to you.” Alejandro cooed, while leaning his hand on a pole “You are such a beautiful woman, and your beauty is not being appreciated over there.”
“I, well, um, ya know, the thing is--” Bridgette stammered. Alejandro went in for a kiss and Bridgette did too, until Team Chris jetted back.
“ALEJANDRO, WE GOTTA GO, MAN!” Tyler said, grabbing the latin boy and throwing him in the sled. Bridgette’s lips missed Alejandro, but lined up perfectly with the pole he was leaning on.
“Awh crahp.” She sighed.
Cody crawled while pulling Team Amazon. Heather and Courtney jumped on the sled. “Ugh, where WERE you guys. This crop top was not made for the Yukon!” Heather complained.
“I think my hair is frozen solid!” Courtney complained.
“Gahys? Ah liytle hahlp hehre?” Bridgette asked.
“Reaylly?” Bridgette complained.
“I think I’ll let Failure and Chris off the hook and make this a Bridgette and Team Cody special!” Chris laughed
Bridgette: The strings of my heart are a tangled mess!
Team Cody: Ooh, mess.
Bridgette: It’s beating so hard it’s come out of my chest!
Team Cody: Ooh, chest.
Bridgette: I tried to fit two men in my soul!
Team Cody: Ooh, soul.
Bridgette: I ended up...STUCK TO A POLE!
Team Cody: She got stuck, should have ducked, worst of luck! Stuck! Stuck to a po-o-o-ole!
Bridgette: I fell for every little thing that he said!
Team Cody: Ooh, said!
Bridgette: Then when we went in he got pulled on a sled!
Team Cody: Ooh, sled!
Bridgette: He’s moved on, I’m still stuck in this place!
Team Cody: Ooh, place!
Bridgette: WILL SOMEBODY POUR WARM WATER ON MY FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE?
Team Cody: She got stuck, should have ducked, worst of luck, stuck, stuck to a po-o-ole. Stuck, stuck to a pole!
“So wehll you gahys help?” Bridgette asked.
Gwen and Courtney immediately stood up to go help her but Heather hit cody with the reins.
“Sorry, but this is a GAME. Mush!” Heather yelled.
“Sorry…” Cody whimpered as he crawled along with his team.
“LINDSAY? LINDSAY? LINDSA-AAAAAAAAAH!” Tyler was still calling for his forgotten flame when team chris’s sled veered right off a cliff.
Tyler (CONF): So maybe this wasn’t the absolute BEST choice I’ve ever made…
Tyler held onto the edge of the cliff and the rest of the team hung onto him and each other. “Quick question, how are we ALIVE?” Noah asked
“My super strong fingers.” Tyler boasted. “Always won at thumb wrestling! And scarred a few of the girls at school...I didn’t mean for it to go there so forcefully.”
“This is fun! Whee!” Izzy began bouncing up and down, causing Tyler to lose his grip slowly.
“No!” Tyler screamed as he barely held onto the cliff. Lindsay was strolling casually and saw them hanging.
“Tyler? Is that you! Oh no! Tyler!” Lindsay yelled.
“You know who I am?” Tyler gasped dramatically.
“Yeah! You’re Tyler! We hooked up on the first season. You were eliminated in the episode Phobia Factor and recieved 19th place!” Lindsay grinned.
“How do you know that?” Tyler asked.
“You’re on Nikipedia.” Lindsay cheerfully showed her phone to the camera.
“She remembers me….she...remembers...ME!” Tyler screamed, as he launched himself and hsi team upwards, and right back into their sled.
“That’s...not exactly how gravity works, but I’ll take it!” Trent grinned.
Cody crawled to the finish line and fainted. “Cody’s Angels take first place and first class!”
“YES!” Heather cheered as the whole group celebrated hugging.
“Need...water…” Cody mumbled.
“Don’t worry honey, I’ve got water for you right here…” Sierra brought him up to her mouth, drooling.
“ACTUALLY I THINK I’M FULLY HYDRATED GONNA GO BACK ON THE PLANE NOW, THANKS!” Cody said and ran away.
“Failure and Chris better get a move on cause Team Cody is finished!” Chris boomed with his megaphone.
“Cody’s already done? We gotta go!” Tyler announced. He grabbed Lindsay in his arms. “Let’s go, babe!”
Ezekiel was close to the finish with Team Failure, but it was still just Eva and Leshawna. “Where IS everyone!” Eva grumbled. Suddenly, DJ, Harold, and Justin came running to the sled.
“Where WERE YOU?” Eva yelled.
“I was taking care of my new best friend, Sealy the seal!” DJ smiled and cradled the seal. “And they’ve been fighting since the challenge “ he said, gesturing to Harold and Justin.
“You’re just mad that I’m beautiful!” Justin scoffed.
“You’re only beautiful by western standards of beauty! By eastern european standards of 1398, I’m a total stud!” Harold scoffed.
“Stop fighting, you idiots. We need to WIN!” Eva bellowed, so loud it shook the icebergs.
Eva (CONF): Sometimes I may get a liiiiile bit too intense.
Ezekiel ran the rest of Failure to the finish line. “We won eh!” Ezekiel cheered.
“Nope. I said you need ALL of your members. And you’re missing…” Chris began.
“BRIDGETTE!” All six members yelled at once.
“AHM HEYRE!” Bridgette said, carrying the pole.
“What happened to you, girl!” Leshawna asked.
“Lohng stohry shurt, I triyed to kiss alehandrow end ended up wif dis pol.” Bridgette said, sadly.
Leshawna (CONF): I’m gonna pretend I understood that.
“So we win now, right!” DJ cheered.
‘“Nope, you’re still missing…” Chris began.
“LINDSAY!” The team yelled.
“Can you let me finish my statement next time?” Chris asked angrily. “Geez.”
Team Chris came barreling down the ice to the finish line. “Extreme!” Tyler slid across the ice past the finish line, with Lindsay behind them.
“Team Chris gets ‘you-weren’t-the-WORST-I-guess’ place!” Chris cheered.
“Good job, Tyler!” Trent cheered as he hugged him.
Tyler (CONF): Man, today was awesome! I went from a Total Drama Nobody to winning it for my team, AND reuniting with my girl! Everything is going Tyler’s way!
The confession cam collapsed on Tyler.
“Wait, Bridge, what happened with the pole?” Geoff asked.
“Weyll, ah-” Bridgette began
“Bridgette tried to swap spit with Alejandro and he had to go, meaning she got stuck.” Heather sneered.
Heather (CONF): I don’t actually have anything against Bridgette. I just wanted Alejandro to know that I SEE his game. Also, the fact that there was drama that I wasn’t involved in hurt me deeply.
“WHAT? I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU COULD DO THIS TO A HUMAN BEING!” Geoff yelled, turning around to Alejandro.
“Al, bro. I can’t believe she did this to you..” Geoff hugged him.
“Yes, I tried to stop her but she seduced me!” Alejandro began crying.
“We’re done!” Geoff said to Bridgette.
Bridgette (CONF): *sighs8
“Team Failure, failure to cross the finish leads to elimination tonight, where one of your butts is getting iced. PERMANENTLY.” Chris laughed as the team glared at Lindsay and Bridgette.
DJ, Ezekiel, Harold, Leshawna, Eva, and Justin sat discussing the boot.
“It HAS to be Bridgette tonight. Kissing another man is low.” Justin said, as Harold nodded.
“Stop slutshaming her. I don’t care who she swaps spit with, as long as it doesn’t lose us the challenge, like Lindsay swapping spit with Tyler did!” Eva complained
“I kinda want Bridgette to stay, eh.” Ezekiel admitted to strange looks.
Ezekiel (CONF): I mean, now we know she kisses guy she’s not dating, AND she’s single now! Talk about a score!
Team Failure sat at elimination. “Wow. To be frank, your guys’ performance was pretty pathetic. So it’s time for one of you to fall off a plane.” Chris grinned
Bridgette (CONF): *stamps reluctantly*
Lindsay (CONF): *stamps face*
Eva (CONF): *stamps angrily*
DJ (CONF): *lets the seal go from inside his shirt* It’s okay, little buddy. You’re fine here. You won’t be--
Chris ran into the confessional and threw the seal out of the plane.
DJ (CONF): WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?
“Alright, the votes are in.” Chris said. “Barfbags for Eva, Leshawna, and DJ.” All three caught their barfbags happily.
“Harold and Justin.” Chris called. The two stuck their toungues out at each other.
“Ezekiel.” Chris threw him the barf bag and he cheered.
“First time I’ve ever been safe at elimination, yo!” He cheered.
“Don’t get used to it.” Chris grinned. “Anyway, Bridgette and Lindsay. Your performances in the challenge today were equally abysmal. But the person taking the drop of shame is…
Lindsay!” He threw the barfbag to Bridgette.
“Really? Even I thought I was going home.” Bridgette sheepishly admitted.
“LINDSAY!” Tyler ran in. “They voted you out? Aww man...and we just got back together too!”
“It’s okay Tyler. I’ll be thinking about you all the time at Playa des Losers! Unless I forget your existence again.” Lindsay thought out loud.
“That’s the most romantic thing anyone’s ever said to me.” Tyler teared up and the two began making out.
Chris kicked Lindsay out of the plane door. “BYYYYYYYE!” she yelled back.
“Well that’s one blonde down, and one blonde in VERY hot water.” The entirety of Team Failure stared at Bridgette. “What will happen next? Find out on Total...Drama….World Tour!”
Chapter Five- Broadway, Baby!
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, things got ICY in the Yukon! Eva realized her team DEFINITELY lived up to their name! We found out that Tyler was actually good at something, namely using his fingers! Yeah...not the most useful talent, but it’s something! And Lindsay finally remembered his existence. Ezekiel pined over Bridgette, but she was too busy pining for Alejandro, who left her stuck to a pole! In the end, it was lost Lindsay who cost their team the challenge and ended up taking the drop of shame! Now there are 21 left, and our next location is waiting! Who will be the big loser in the big apple? Find out, right here, right now on Total...Drama...World...Tour!”
Cody’s Angels sat in first class eating chocolates. “This is...perfect.” Gwen said in a dream-like haze.
Gwen (CONF): First class...is amazing! It’s almost like being on actually good reality show!
“Why can’t every season be like this!” Beth grinned.
“You’re welcome!” Courtney said.
“For what?” Heather raised an eyebrow.
“Leading the team to victory. Duh. Without my leadership, we might still be lost in the Yukon!” Courtney said, smiling smugly.
“You didn’t help us win at all! It was all Cody-wody!” Sierra said pinching Cody’s cheeks. “If anything, he should be leader!” Cody’s face went pale.
“Cody? Leader? I’d like to see that!” Courtney scoffed.
“Why don’t we. You have to give people a chance, Courtney.” Heather said smugly.
“You know what, fine! Let CODY lead the team!” Courtney cried.
Courtney (CONF): If they don’t want my help, then fine! They can go without it and see how long they last!
Cody (CONF): I can’t lead a team! I can’t talk to an attractive girl for more than 5 minutes! But thanks to Sierra, now I have to! *sigh*
In loser class, Alejandro was staring at the floor sadly. “You okay, bro?” Geoff asked.
“Yes, I’m fine. I just...feel so bad. Letting myself get seduced by her...I hope you do not hate me for this, amigo.” Alejandro said to Geoff mournfully.
“Of course not, dude!” Geoff grinned. “It’s not your fault, it’s hers.” Geoff stared at Bridgette, who was on the other side with Team Failure.
Geoff (CONF): I knew Bridgette was mad at me, but I didn’t know she was this bad! Making Alejandro fall in love with her….not cool, man!
Alejandro (CONF): I have no idea WHY Geoff trusts me more than his girlfriend--sorry, FORMER girlfriend, but I am glad that he does *laughs* I mean, it’s just so easy!
Noah (CONF): Alejandro is sooo transparent. Bridgette is as exciting as a piece of toast- why would SHE be seducing people? Everything he does is fishy.
On Team Failure’s side of loser class, they sat in silence. “So…” Leshawna began.
“Um…” DJ said.
“Well, ya know…” Eva said.
Justin (CONF): After the whole Bridgette fiasco, the whole team vibe is really awkward. I’m not quite sure that Alejandro’s telling the whole truth though- he’s hot, and hot guys like me don’t get seduced- we’re the ones doing the seducing.
“If it makes you feel any better, I don’t hate you.” Ezekiel smiled and pat Bridgette on the back.
“Thanks Zeke. That actually...helps, believe it or not.” Bridgette sighed.
Ezekiel (CONF): Score one for Zeke! I comforted Bridgette and she was totally into it, eh! I think that might be the first time we’ve ever actually spoken!
The plane flew towards a city with lots of skyscrapers and eventually stopped on airport runway.
“Us having a safe landing? That’s a first.” Gwen laughed.
“There was actually nowhere for us to unsafely land. It’s crowded here.” Chris complained. “Anyway, welcome to New York City!”
Courtney (CONF): NYC! Since I was a little girl, I dreamed of packing up all my things and moving here to become a big star…’s attorney.
“The Big Apple is where your next challenge takes place! Your first challenge is to find a carriage that you’ll carry one of your teammates in all the way to central park!” Chris announced.
“That should be easy! I mean, there are carriages everywhere in New York!” Cody smiled.
“I never specified which KIND of carriage.” Chris corrected. “You have to find a BABY carriage!”
“Cool!” Beth grinned.
Beth (CONF): My parents never threw away my baby carriage! I still ride in it sometimes when I get bored!
“We have to steal a carriage from a mother? That’s low, even for you.” Gwen commented.
“Oh, we have designated carriages. They’re right ….up….” Chris looked around to see the carriages. “..there!” He pointed to the top of the statue of liberty.
“Ooh! Do we get to hijack a plane from the airport and fly up there!” Izzy grinned.
“NO. That’s a...VERY...sensitive subject.” Chris sighed.
Izzy (CONF): New York is awesome! There are so many tall buildings and so many people...so many….fun…..things could be done! *laughs evily*
The teams were on a boat going to the statue. “Okay, who wants to be the Izzy handler for the day?” Noah asked. “There are way too many things in this city for her not to do something scary.”
“I’ll do it.” Trent said. “I’m sure she’ll be fine.”
Trent (Cockpit CONF): I know Izzy’s a little crazy , but I like to think of myself as a pretty calm and persuasive guy, and I think I can handle her just fine!
“You gon die.” Chef Hatchet warned.
“Welcome to the statue of liberty!” Chris announced to the teams.
“Wow, it’s so big!” Sadie said, incredulously.
“Great insight, Sadie!” Courtney rolled her eyes.
Sadie ran over to Cody. “Cody, can you tell Courtney to stop being so mean?” she asked.
“Why me?” Cody asked.
“I mean you ARE the leader now!” Sadie grinned.
Cody (CONF): Apparently as the leader I have to..break up conflicts? Courtney never did that! In fact, she only added to them!
Sadie (CONF): Having Cody as leader is soooo cool, especially compared to Courtney. I can actually talk to Cody without being scared for my life!
“Hey Courtney, maybe...tone it down a bit? You know, with the insults?” Cody asked.
“Tone it down?” Courtney looked livid, and was about to retort. “S-sure! I’ll definitely tone it down!”
Courtney (CONF): AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
“Alright. Once you get your carriage, you’ll go down the fireman’s pole Then, get on your boat through the beautiful NYC sewers--” The contestants groaned while Chris chuckled.”..and all the way to central park. The first and second teams to get there get an advantage in part 2!”
“There’s a part TWO?” Leshawna asked incredulously. “THAT isn’t enough?”
“Yep!” Chris blew an airhorn. “Go!”
Sierra immediately began climbing up the rope to the top, but hurt her hands. “What is this?” Sierra asked.
“Steel wool. Captures the spirit of New York City- rough and annoying!” Chris grinned.
“O-M-G Chris, parentheses three your sense of humor!” Sierra grinned
Sierra (CONF): Everyone hates Chris’ challenges, but I love them! I watched people get tortured on this show for two seasons, to get tortured myself is soooo exciting!
DJ began climbing “Ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch!” He cried while scaling the steel wool. A pigeon landed on his shoulder. “Aww, hey there little guy.”
DJ (CONF): This is Paul the Pigeon. He’s my new pet! I just have to make sure Chris DOESN’T find out about him...he doesn’t seem to like my animals, for some reason. I think he just hates all things that are alive.
Izzy was the close to the top. “Ooh, this is fun! You know what I should do?” she began.
“Don’t let go and drop kick everyone back down!” Trent called.
“Aww, fine.” Izzy pouted.
Trent (CONF): It’s actually easier than I thought to get into the mind of a crazy person. ...does that make me crazy? Nah, I’m like the most normal person on this show! Wait, was the number of words in that confessional a multiple of 9?
Sierra was the first person to reach the top. “OMG!” she squealed. “I’m so good at this challenge!” She merrily skipped onto the crown of the statue and grabbed the carriage.
Bridgette reached the top of the statue second. “I’ll get the carriage!” she called down to her team.
“Don’t make out with it!” Justin called up to her. She sighed.
Bridgette (CONF): Okay, so not cool!
Bridgette went onto the crown and tried to grab the carriage, but was scared to lean out all the way to grab it fully. She grabbed the handle, and tried to flip it over her head, but ended up sending it and her, flying towards the middle of the crown, landing on top of Sierra and accidentally kissing her.
Geoff reached the crown. “Really?” he asked Bridgette.
Duncan reached the top and saw the carriage on the very end of the crown. “No way I’m getting that.” he scoffed. “Might as well just wait for--”
Izzy jumped onto the top, ran onto the crown and threw the carriage at Geoff. “Woo!” she cheered.
Sadie was the last of her team to climb up to the top. “That was hard!” she complained.
“Sorry to break it to you, but we still have a whole challenge left to do! Let’s go!” Heather rolled her eyes and went down the fireman’s pole. The rest of the team followed suit.
While sliding down, Sadie began talking to Cody. “Can you tell Heather to stop being so mean?” Sadie asked him.
“Uh...yeah, sure!” Cody grinned, then immediately grimaced.
Cody (CONF): I can deal with Courtney, but Heather? She’s a whole different...much scarier ball game.
“LET’S GO!” Eva yelled from the top of the statue. DJ, Ezekiel, Bridgette, Leshawna, and Justin were standing next to her, with only Harold still climbing.
“I’m PACING myself! GOSH!” Harold cried.
Eva growled and yanked on the rope, bringing Harold and everyne else still climbing up with it. Team Failure stared at her. “I was impatient.”
Eva (CONF): Some say that I have a….”temper”, to those people I say...SCREW YOY! YOU DUMB JERKS! YOU FAT UGLY--
“Good job on making it up team!” Alejandro smiled, looking at Noah and Tyler who were on the ground after being yanked up by Eva. “Let us leave!”
Alejandro (CONF): My team is...incompetent..to put it nicely. I still support them in everything they do, because I need to seem like a nice helpful team member, but if it were up to me...quite a few of them would be GONE by now. *coughs* Noah.
Cody’s Angels jumped in the boat. Heather started the engine. “Alright, let’s move it or lose it! And no, I do not mean lose it literally, though some of us seem to be TRYING.” Heather glared at Sadie.
Sadie nudged Cody, who gulped and then walked over to Heather. “Can we talk?” Cody asked.
“Sure. Beth, drive!” Heather ordered.
“I don’t have a lisc-” Beth began.
“Drive!” Heather ordered.
Beth (CONF): I’ve been lying low for a while, but maybe driving the boat is what will make me an asset for my team!
“So, y’know being the...y’know LEADER and all I’ve heard a few....uh, complaints that want you to be...nicer.” Cody cringed.
“They want me to be nicer? Being mean is like...my whole thing!” Heather complained. “But fine, I will be. But remember, me, you and Sierra are an alliance, and miss BFFFFL is going HOME next time we lose.”
Cody (CONF): Huh. That was..somehow easier than I thought it would be.
“This is fun!” Beth grinned. The boat entered the sewers, where it was pitchblack. “Suddenly not so fun!”
The boat began ramming into the sides. “Beth, just hold it still!” Gwen yelled.
“I’m trying!” Beth screamed as the boa continued to swerve. Cody pushed beth out of the seat, turned the headlights on, and got the boat moving quickly and straight.
Cody (CONF): You know, being the hero is not so bad!
“Come on, let’s move, move, move!” Eva yelled. Team Failure quickly slid down the fireman’s pole.
Harold got into the boat first and revved the engine. “Everyone ready?” he asked.
“Um, how come you get to steer?” Justin questioned.
“Because I went to Nautical Steve’s Boating Camp, duh.” Harold scoffed.
“Everyone who’s seen any beach movie ever knows that the hot guy steers the boat shirtless.” Justin said, taking the wheel and ripping off his shirt.
Harold (CONF): People really don’t appreciate my mad skills on this show. I mean, does Justin have a boating certificate from Nautical Steve’ himself? I think not.
“Hey Bridgette, just wanna make sure you’re okay, eh.” Ezekiel leaned over as the team drove into the sewer.
“Not really, but I’m getting better. Thank you.” Bridgette smiled.
Bridgette (CONF): Ezekiel isn’t the first person I’d peg as a friend when this season started but...he’s actually pretty genuine. It’s nice to know that someone doesn’t hate me and has no ulterior motives.
Ezekiel (CONF): *sing-songy* I’m gonna get with Bridgette! It’s gonna be awesome! I’m the coolest kid on Total Drama! *falls into toilet* Oh no!
“Come on guys, all the other teams are already in their boats! Let’s do this, brosephs!” Geoff cheered as they slid down the fireman’s pole.
Duncan jumped into the boat and immediately took the wheel. “I’m driving. You don’t know how many detention centers I’ve driven one of these out of.”
“Does anyone have objections?” Alejandro asked. He then looked and saw Izzy biting the boat and Trent trying to pull her away, Geoff and Tyler arm wrestling, and Noah reading.
Alejandro (CONF): How far is the merge again?
“OMG Cody, you’re doing awesome!” Sierra squealed.
“Thanks! It’s all in a days wo-OOOOH NO!” Cody screamed as a gigantic alligator approached the team’s boat. The rest of the team screamed.
“You LEAVE MY CODY ALONE!” Sierra screeched as she kicked the alligator in the nose. It began to cry. “Good! Think about what you’ve done.” Sierra shook her head at the gator as the team drove out of the sewer.
“Congratulations! You guys are the first team out of the sewer!” Chris grinned. “Your next task is to get to turtle pond. It’s juuuust around the bend...5 miles from here. And one of you has to ride in the baby carriage!”
“Oooh! I’ll do it!” Beth offered, as she jumped into the carriage.
Heather (CONF): There are SO MANY JOKES to be made there! But I have to hold my tongue for…*gags* Cody. I think I might have preferred Courtney, as...disgusting as that is.
Team Failure rode through the sewer on the boat. “No one can even see me shirtless in this darkness! What a waste.” Justin frowned.
Suddenly, the gator appeared in front of their boat and bared it’s teeth. “Well, at least you’ll get to DIE shirtless!” Leshawna gulped.
DJ jumped on the gator and began petting it. “It’s okay, buddy. Don’t be angry. We’re not gonna hurt you.” The gator smiled and DJ started scratching it’s stomach.
DJ (CONF): Alligators are just like bunnies! Only a LOOOOT bigger.
Team Failure drove out of the sewer. “Harold, you’re small and frail, be the baby.” Eva ordered.
“For your information, I went to bodybuilding steve’s--” Harold began.
“No one cares!” Team Failure all shouted at once.
Team Chris drove into the sewer. “Hey, who turned off the lights?” Noah asked, before realizing where they were. “Ugh, it smells like Owen.”
“Maybe you would know where we were if you were paying ATTENTION, amigo.” Alejandro commented.
Noah (CONF): It’s not my fault that a book is more exciting than a conversation with Trent! Alejandro’s so smug. He think she’s better than me just because he’s tan...and has giant pulsing muscles...and everyone likes him...all those things mean nothing, by the way!
“Uh..guys, we might have a bit of a problem.” Duncan said, seeing the gigantic gator.
“Gimme the wheel!” Tyler said, running up and wrestling it out of Duncan’s hands.
“EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!” Tyler cried, while driving up the gator’s back. It shocklngly worked. The team drove out of the sewer.
“Nice one Tyler!” Trent grinned.
“Excellent work, compadre.” Alejandro smiled.
Tyler (CONF): Two challenges in a row of being the team MVP. People underestimate me here!*stands up and head breaks through the ceiling *Dangit…
“Team Chris is the last one through the sewer!” Chris announced. “Now, who’s your baby?”
“Ooh, I will!” Izzy grinned.
“No, you’re staying with me.” Trent said. Izzy sighed.
“Noah can do it. He has the frame for it.” Alejandro smiled as Duncan laughed and Noah seethed.
“Don’t condescend to me, you--” Duncan closed the lid of the carriage, making Noah unhearable.
“Now isn’t that better?” Duncan smiled, as Team Chris began running.
All three teams eventually were neck and neck. “I thought our path was shortest?” Heather asked.
“Yeah..I sorta lied.” Chris smiled. “Yours was the longest. Even challenges create drama! And for more fun…”
The entire cast groaned, sans Courtney.
Courtney: What’s not to love about New York City? The taxis move at a new york ditty! The pigeons fly, the crime is high, what’s not to love about New York?
Geoff: The lights are lighter! The fun is funner! The bagels are bagel-er! The bums are bummer! Dirt and grime make every alley shine! What’s not to love about New York?
Beth: The stores and the fashion! Big shows where stars cash in! It’s crazy cause the city never sleeps!
DJ: Dance break!
- DJ and Leshawna perform some terrible, horrible, no good, very bad dancing*
Team Cody: Subway trains and the hustle bustle!
Team Failure: Cappucinos while the mobsters tussle!
Team Chris: And pretzel stands for all you pretzel fans!
Geoff: What’s not to love?
Team Chris: What’s not to love?
All: What’s not to love about New York?
All three teams reached turtle pond. Chris appeared to explain the next part. “Now, each team must pick a volunteer to go get an apple from the middle of turtle pond!” Chris held up a snapping turtle. “And it does live up to it’s name!”
“Cody, you have to pick who goes as LEADER!” Sadie grinned.
“Um...Heather?” Cody said anxiously.
“Me???? That’s...that’s...that’s perfectly fine, thanks Cody!” Heather said, eye twitching.
Heather (CONF): That little twerp is so lucky I’m in an alliance with him, or he would be GONE!
Leshawna jumped in the pond. “This should be easy. I ain’t scared of no turtles!” she scoffed.
“I will go, friends.” Alejandro said, stepping into the pond. “Just so none of you have to.”
“Gee thanks, Martyrjan-” Alejandro slammed the baby carriage lid shut again, making Noah unhearable.
Heather walked into the water. “Hey, this isn’t that bad.” she said. A turtle immediately bit her hair. “Not my extensions!”
“Hmph. These turtles know not to mess with Leshawna!” Leshawna said, smugly. A turtle then bit Leshawna in the butt. “Leshawna down. Leshawna down!”
Alejandro skipped through the water gracefully, grabbed the apple, and put it in the Team Chris carriage. “Let us go, friends.”
Heather (CONF): He can walk on water now? Ugh! And my team is forcing me to go turtle fishing! *turtle pops out of her shirt, bites her chin* AHHHH!
“Do you have control of Izzy?” Alejandro asked Trent.
“Yeah, but I don’t know for how much longer. She has that look in her eyes.” Trent said, staring at Izzy. The redhead maniacally laughed.
“How about me and Tyler go set a sweet Izzy trap, and you dudes just run to the end after us!” Geoff grinned.
“Sounds like a plan to me.” Duncan shrugged. Geoff and Tyler ran off, and the rest of Team Chris followed another path.
“Get off me you little freaks!” Heather threw turtles off of her back and then dropped the apple in the carriage. “Let’s go.” Team Cody began running.
Leshawna ran back to the carriage with the apple. “Let’s get a move on! I want to WIN!” Eva ordered as Team Failure began running.
Trent and Izzy ran together. “So Izzy, hypothetically, if you wanted to do something crazy before the end of the challenge, what would it be?” Trent asked.
“Well, I’d probably wait until we got a few yards from the end, jump in front of the carriage and throw it and the whole team a super far distance back!” Izzy grinned.
“There we go.” Trent shrugged.
“OMG, I can’t believe Codykins is about to lead us to a win!” Sierra gushed.
“I know! He’s like, the best leader ever!” Sadie squealed.
“Okay, I can’t be the only one nauseated with leader Cody, right?” Heather said, while running to the finish line with Gwen and Courtney.
“Yeah, it’s disgusting. I should be up there.” Courtney scowled.
“You know, I never thought I’d be agreeing with you two, but yeah.” Gwen said. “It’s weird.”
“I think it’s high time an ALLIANCE was formed to stop it.” Courtney smiled.
“Oh, I am sooooo in.” Heather grinned.
“Weirdly enough...so am I.” Gwen shrugged.
Courtney and Heather put their hands in the middle and raised them while evily laughing. “Way to nail the subtlety part, guys.” Gwen rolled her eyes.
Gwen (Cockpit CONF): Aligning with Courtney is like making a deal with the devil...aligning with Heather is like making a deal with the devil’s meaner scarier older brother…but none of us like the Cody-as-a-leader thing, so why not?
Chef laughed evily.
Gwen (Cockpit CONF): I somehow feel like I’m gonna regret this.
Team Failure ran to the finish line. “We’re so close!” Eva yelled.
“And Paul made it the whole way through!” DJ grinned. Chris shot the bird with a tranquilizer.
“And Team Failure scores first place and a trip to first class!” The entire team cheered, sans DJ who fell to his knees and began to weep. “WHY?” he cried.
Team Chris and Team Cody had a foot race to the finish. Team Chris was slightly ahead when Geoff and Tyler rejoined the team.
“The trap is set?” Trent asked.
“Yep. When she jumps ahead to try and stop us, the ground will give out and she’ll fall in!” Geoff grinned.
“Nice.” Trent smiled.
Team Chris was grinning nearing the end and where the trap was set. However, instead of stopping them from the front, Izzy jumped backwards and kicked all 6 team members into the hole they dug.
Izzy (CONF): Expect the unexpected.
Team Cody swerved around and went to the finish line. “Yes!” Cody cheered.
“Cody’s Angels are not eliminating anyone tonight!” Chris announced. “Still get to..’enjoy’ loser class, however. As for Team Chris, you’ll officially become the team with the least players, AND with the least dignity tonight at elimination. Have fun!”
“Should it be Izzy tonight?” Tyler asked Geoff, Trent and Alejandro. “I mean it’s her fault that we lost.”
“I mean, it’s sorta our fault for trying to trap her.” Geoff said. “And Trent’s for not handling her.”
“Yeah, maybe Trent should go home!” Tyler said.
“I’m right here!” Trent complained.
“No, no, you’re going about this all wrong. There is a bigger threat that needs to be eliminated, immediately.” Alejandro smiled.
Noah went up to Izzy, Trent, and Geoff. “Okay. I know Izzy messed up the challenge, but Alejandro’s a total slimeball. He NEEDS to leave.” Noah plotted.
“Yeah. Anyone that normal can’t be trusted.” Izzy shook her head. She then looked at Trent. “Eh...you’re okay I guess.”
Geoff and Trent exchanged glances, then gulped.
“Team Chris... I gotta say, I’m dissapointed. I thought a team with MY namesake would do much better. Anyway, one of you is gone. Let’s see who it is!” Chris grinned.
Noah (CONF): You are WAY too smart. *stamps passport*
Alejandro (CONF): Bye bye. *stamps passport*
Trent (CONF): Sorry. *stamps passport reluctantly*
Izzy (CONF): *stamps lots of passports wildly*
“Alright. The REVOTES are in. Since SOMEONE decided to stamp everyone’s passport.” Chris glared. Izzy whistled.
“Barfbags for...Geoff, Tyler, and Duncan!” Chris announced. Geoff and Tyler high fived, while Duncan caught his smoothly.
“Trent is also safe.” Chris announced. Trent’s hit him in the forehead, but he didn’t flinch.
“Dude, are you alright?” Duncan asked.
“Oh, yeah. My head is so big that anything that happens in the top half of it doesn’t actually have any nerves or brain receptors or anything.” Trent smiled. Duncan backed away slowly.
“Izzy, Noah, Alejandro. Two of you are safe, but one of you is going home. And that person is…..
…” Chris was about to speak but was interrupted by a loud helicopter flying right by the plane door. “RCMP! WE ARE HERE FOR IZZY!” a loud booming voice yelled.
“Oh my gosh, soooo clingy!” Izzy said, referring to the RCMP. “Welp, gotta go! See ya later!” Izzy smiled and jumped out of the plane with no parachute.
“Well...she’s out, I guess. Who will get voted out or seized by the police next time? Find out right here on Total...Drama...World Tour!” Chris smiled.
Chapter Six- When In Romania...
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our three teams got a big taste of the big apple! On Team Chris, there was no love lost between Noah and Alejandro. But on Team Cody, everyone was in love with Cody! Except for Gwen, Heather, and Courtney, who formed a pact to send HIM packing! Ice cold. But it was overplanning for Izzy that caused Team Chris the challenge, and it was the RCMP that cost Izzy the game! I’m sure she enjoyed her parachuteless drop of shame. Now, 20 are left, and our next location is sure to be totally BATTY. Who will get hassled in the castle? Find out, right here, right now, on Total..Drama...World Tour!”
Team Failure sat in first class, getting pedicures. “This is great.” Bridgette grinned.
“Yeah. They got rid of my worst bunion!” Eva smiled.
Bridgette (CONF): I’m scared that there’s more than one.
“So, Leshawna...have you realized from the whole Bridgette fiasco what a bad guy that Alejandro is?” Harold asked.
“That was Bridgette’s fault, not his. And why do you care?” Leshawna asked.
“Because if we’re dating, you need to stop making googoo eyes at the spanish boy!” Harold scoffed.
“Okay, first off, I am not making eyes at the spanish boy. Second, I can look at whoever I WANT. Third of all, we are NOT DATING!” Leshawna yelled. The rest of the team looked over at them.
Justin (CONF): Seeing Harold’s dreams get destroyed...man, it was almost better than the pedicure.
Leshawna (CONF): Do I feel bad...no, not really! If he wants to keep saying we’re dating, I’ll keep shooting him down.
“Well fine, if you want to be like that, I don’t care! Gosh!” Harold yelled. “I’d be storming off right now but my nails are still drying.”
In loser class, Sierra was gushing over Cody. “OMG, that challenge win was epic!” she giggled, hugging the lowly nerd.
Sierra (CONF): Cody is such a better leader than Courtney. With him, I bet we’ll win every challenge!
“Does she not remember the part where we almost lost?” Courtney scoffed to Heather.
“The only reason we won is because of Izzy.” Gwen rolled her eyes. “And we didn’t even win! We just didn’t-lose!
Heather (CONF): Oh believe me, Gwen and Courtney is the LAST alliance I thought I’d have. But it kinda...works in a way. We have an equal capacity for hatred!
“That loss was a terrible one, compadres.” Alejandro frowned. “I wonder who would’ve gone home if Izzy didn’t have to go?
Alejandro (CONF): Being in the bottom 3 last night is very concerning. I wasn’t going home, of course, but the fact that Noah actually voted for me is very shady. I wish Izzy’s police record didn’t keep him here.
Geoff stared at Team Failure. Bridgette looked up and smiled at him. He immediately scowled and walked away.
Geoff (CONF): I miss Bridgette...but I can’t forgive her for what she did! SERIOUSLY not cool!
Bridgette (CONF): I feel AWFUL about what happened with Alejandro. I just want to get a chance to talk to Geoff, but he won’t even look at me!
The first class contestants all slept on reclined seats. In loser class, Cody slept in Sierra’s lap, Beth slept in the fetal position, Saide slept straddling a broom, and the rest of the contestants slept normally and calmly.
“Awwww...so peaceful “ Chris smiled. He then turned on the loudspeaker and screamed “WAKE UP!”
The contestants were all gathered in the dining area of the plane. “Why do we have a challenge NOW? It’s the middle of the night.” Heather complained.
“Um, for asethetic reasons.” Chris said. “This show needs to look as good as possible, and you can’t do a spooky challenge at day time.” DJ gulped.
DJ (CONF): Okay, so maybe both of my previous eliminations were in horror challenges. But that means nothing! I am NOT afraid. *knock on door* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
The contestants exited the plane to see a large ominous castle in front of them. ‘Welcome to…TRANSYLVANIA!” Thunder crashed dramatically after Chris spoke. “Technically it’s Romania, but it sounds more dramatic if we call it TRANSYLVANIA!” Thunder crashed again.
“I think I was born in that castle.” Eva stated, the entire cast looked at her.
Eva (Cockpit CONF): Things in eastern europe aren’t so...developed. My mom went into labor when she was training near here, and this was the closest facility. My dad was an amazing doctor, so it was all fine.
“You weird, girl.” Chef said, looking concerned.
“Enter!” Chris said, and the castle doors opened dramatically as thunder crashed. “Wow, that wasn’t even planned. Cool.”
The contestants stood with Chris inside the castle. “Now, here in Transylvania, there’s kind of a….vampire problem. And for today’s challenge, you’re going to have to deal with that face to face! There are 3 vampires--”
“So, interns in costumes.” Heather said.
“So, VAMPIRES.” Chris replied angrily. “Anyway, they’re inside the castle. Your challenge is simply to not get captured! The last person standing wins it for their team. And for the losers...well, you’ve got a date with me tonight at elimination, where we’ll find out which one of you DEFINITELY can’t fly.” Chris laughed.
DJ (CONF): V-v-vampires? I mean, I’m not SCARED or anything but….vampires?
“Courtney, let’s go.” Heather demanded.
“Duncan, come with!” Courtney called. Duncan joined the two girls.
Courtney (CONF): I’ve barely gotten to talk to Duncan at all! I’ve been too busy leading the team. But now that *eye twitch* CODY is leading, I can finally actually enjoy a world tour with my boyfriend!
“Let’s go Cody-wody!” Sierra squealed, grabbing the skinny boy and carrying him.
“Would you lovely ladies mind if I accompanied you?” Alejandro asked Beth and Sadie.
“Not at all.” Sadie smiled.
Sadie (CONF): Alejandro is sooooo yummy! He’s like...Justin before he got ugly!
Alejandro (CONF): Beth and Sadie are both desperate, and they’re probably the easiest people here to seduce. I can’t go after a big gun right after the whole Bridgette mess- it’d be way too obvious.
“Hey Leshawna...not out of being SCARED or anything but just out of general teamwork and working together and friendship and--” DJ began.
“Yes, I’ll come with you, turkey.” Leshawna rolled her eyes.
“I’m coming too!” Harold called.
“Oh, great.” Leshawna sighed.
Harold (CONF): This challenge is my chance to get Leshawna back! When she’s’ scared and needs someone to turn to, and my manly physique is right there, she’ll be begging for me!
“That means you’re coming with me, pretty boy.” Eva picked up Justin and began carrying him.
“Let’s go, bros!” Geoff called to Noah and Tyler, who shrugged and walked with them.
Gwen looked around to see anyone she could partner with, and saw that everyone was gone except Trent. “Oh...good.”
“Well...I guess we have no choice.” Trent awkwardly scratched his head.
“Yep...guess not…” Gwen awkwardly looked at the ground.
Gwen (CONF): *sighs* My life is like a bad sitcom!
DJ, Harold and Leshawna walked through the halls of the castle. “This is f-f-f-ine. Not scary at all.” DJ trembled.
“Leshawna, are you scared? I can hold you if you want, babe.” Harold winked.
“No. Not now, not ever. And I am NOT your babe.” Leshawna yelled.
Harold: You might think I know it all…
“Harold, we’re not to that part of the episode yet. Zip it.” Chris said.
Harold: And maybe I’m headed for a fall…
“Suit yourself.” Chris shrugged.
Harold: I'm just that brainiac guy, left alone to sit and cry. Honey...I have some questions for you first...girl...take some time to school me, quench my thirst... for knowledge. Cause, gosh! I just gotta know...How'd you get so hot?
Harold: You’re so freakin hot!
Harold: My physics knowledge ain’t got hope, of explaining why your butt’s so dope! You bend my space-time continum, then you shake your what your mama give you ems! I don’t even hardly know my name...cause when you walk in the room, nobody’s looking the same!
Harold *beatboxing* Gosh! Alright! I demand a scientific investigation to whether you’re even from the human nation! I swear you’re changing my molecular structure! WIth all your sexy ions...you make my heart rupture!
“Can we stop singing and get a move on? At this rate we’ll get captured by the vampires any second!” Leshawna said and began stomping down the hall.
Harold (CONF): I think she was into it!
“So...Bridgette, it’s a shame about Geoff huh?” Ezekiel said.
“Yeah...it is.” Bridgette looked at the ground sadly.
“Remember, if you ever need to talk, I’m right he--” Tyler pushed Ezekiel out of the way, followed by Noah and Geoff.
“I think we should all travel in a pack. That way, we have a better chance of sending Team Cody, the REAL threats to elimination.” Noah suggested.
“Yeah, what the smart guy said!” Tyler nodded.
Ezekiel (CONF): Seriously? I finally get some alone time with Bridgette, and these hosers have to mess everything up!
Eva and Justin walked. “So, you were really born here?” Justin asked.
“Yep. In that room.” Eva pointed
“That’s….disgusting.” Justin said.
“Times were tough.” Eva shrugged. She opened a large hulking door that led to a gigantic room with lots of buttons and lab equipment.
“Oh man, this was my dad’s laboratory!” Eva said excitedly.
“You were born at your dad’s job?” Justin questioned. “Wow, this just gets weirder and weirder.”
“Don’t judge my family.” Eva snarled. Suddenly, thunder crashed, and a piece of paper fell from the sky into Eva’s hands.
“I have a baaad feeling about this.” Justin commented.
Bridgette, Geoff, Ezekiel, Tyler and Noah all walked in silence. “So, uh….how’s the weather been, lately?” Tyler asked as desperate small talk.
“I’ve been feeling nothing but COLD.” Geoff said, glaring at Bridgette.
“Listen, I said I’m so--” Bridgette began.
“Nuh-uh! Not gonna happen.” Geoff said, walking in front of her. She sighed.
Noah (CONF): I would feel bad if it wasn’t so funny.
“So you’re in an alliance with Heather and Courtney? That sounds….legitimately awful.” Trent said to Gwen as they walked through the castle.
Gwen laughed. “I mean, have you seen my options? It was either that or align with Sadie and Beth.”
“Yeah, your team kinda blows.” Trent chuckled. “My team, however is awesome “
“Yeah, how does your two elimination ceremonies feel?” Gwen questioned, smiling. “AND the fact that it’s a total sausage party?”
“I’d rather have a sausage party then deal with Heather.” Trent chuckled.
Gwen (CONF): You know, after the whole break up fiasco, I forgot how much I enjoy just talking to Trent. He’s such a genuine and cool person, and I miss being able to have normal people conversations without it being all awkward.
“Hey...I just wanna say that I’m sorry for being so weird at the film lot.” Trent scratched his head. “I was being a gigantic weirdo.”
“No, you weren’t. I’m sorry for handling everything so badly.” Gwen sighed. “You deserved much better.”
“Friends?” Trent asked, holding his hand out.
“Friends.” Gwen smiled and shook his hand.
“HISSSSS!” The vampire popped up behind Gwen and Trent.
“AHHHHHH!” The former lovers screamed, and were stuffed into a sack.
Alejandro, Beth, and Sadie walked through the tunnel. “It is such an honor to be walking with such beautiful women.” Alejandro smiled.
“Oh...thank you.” Sadie blushed.
“Thanks! My boyfriend Brady calls me beautiful all the time!” Beth giggled.
“Oh...great...and to be walking with such intelligent women as well….” Alejandro grinned.
“Thanks! I got a 2300 on my SATs!” Beth grinned.
“Me...intelligent?” Sadie asked.
“Of course, you’re such a beautiful and smart woman. You should be leading that team instead of Cody.” Alejandro smiled
Sadie (CONF): That’s the first time anyone’s called me smart! To think...I could be leading the team instead of Cody!
Eva and Justin stood holding the piece of paper. “What is it?” Justin asked.
“Instructions for...reawakening.” Eva read off the paper.
“Reawakening of what?” Justin questioned.
“We’ll never find out unless we get started!” Eva announced, going to turn something on.
“Wait a second...you’re going to actually do this?” Justin asked.
“Yeah. It’s my dad, what’s the worst thing that can happen?” Eva asked.
“A lot! A lot of bad things can happen!” Justin yelled.
Justin (CONF): Everyone knows that hot guys DIE in horror movies! Dead people get significantly less modeling deals then alive ones!
Noah, Geoff, Tyler, Bridgette, and Ezekiel stood in front of a giant sprawling staircase. “This can lead to nothing good.” Noah stared at the giant thing.
“Hey Bridgette, want to push me down? It’ll probably hurt less!” Geoff scoffed. Bridgette sighed
“I’ll go up first! EXTREME!” Tyler yelled and began running up the steps, About 10 stairs in, a vampire fell from the ceiling and grabbed Tyler. It then stared at the other four.
“RUN!” Ezekiel yelled, and the other four ran in the other direction.Bridgette slipped and fell.
“Get up, Bridge! Don’t go!” Geoff cried, then realized what he’d done. “I mean…now you know how I feel!”
Geoff (CONF): I still really love her but….I just can’t be with her after what she did! *sighs* Dude, why is this game so hard?
Courtney, Duncan and Heather were walking through the castle. “So, Cody’s leading your team?” Duncan questioned.
“Yes, Instead of ME, can you believe it?” Courtney scoffed.
“Well, you can always lead me.” Duncan grined, and the two began to make out passionately.
Courtney (CONF): I’ve been so focused on the game that I haven’t been able to just be Duncan’s girlfriend. It’s nice.
Heather (CONF): I just want to make it clear that I agreed to go with Courtney, NOT Courtney and Duncan. Those two making out was making me nauseous!
A vampire appeared and immediately captured Courtney and Duncan. “Ha!” Heather laughed. She then realized the situation and gulped as she was stuffed in the sack.
Ezekiel, Bridgette, Geoff, and Noah kept walking. “Wow...this is scary, eh?” Ezekiel said.
“Bridgette’s the scary one.” Geoff rolled his eyes,
“Why are you taking this?” Ezekiel whispered to Bridgette.
“Because I deserve it for everything I’ve done!” Bridgette frowned.
“No you don’t! You’re awesome! You’re like...the coolest girl here! You’re--” Ezekiel praied, but was cut off by the vampire coming up behind him.
“You’re dead!” The vampire said, stuffing Ezekiel into the sack. Geoff, Bridgette, and Noah screamed and ran away.
“Scalpel.” Eva called.
“Scalpel.” Justin handed it to her.
“Screwdriver.” Eva called.
“Screwdriver.” Justin replied, handing it to her
“Meat.” Eva called.
“Meat.” Justin replied, handing her a gigantic drumstick that she took a bite out of.
“I think it’s finished. Fire up the electricity!” Eva ordered Justin.
Justin flipped a switch and the room went dark, while the two wires on Eva’s creation began jolting electricity. A giant green monster that was lying on the table opened it’s eyes and stood up.
“It’s alive...IT’S ALIVE!” Eva yelled “HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
“I think your dad might have been Dr.Frankenstein.” Justin commented.
“Not familiar.” Eva replied. The green monster began walking out of the laboratory, walking through the wall without flinching.
“Thiiiis could be bad.” Eva commented. Justin nodded.
“Okay, that was WAY too close for comfort.” Noah caught his breath with Bridgette and Geoff.
“Much like Bridgette and Alejandro!” Geoff sniped.
“Look Geoff, I’m sorry. I’m really, really, sorry. What more do you want me to say?” Bridgette asked.
“I want you to say--run!” Geoff yelled.
“You want me to say run?” Bridgette questioned. She saw the vampire behind Noah and screamed as he was stuffed into the sack.
Noah (CONF): I was more mad that I missed the Bridgette/Geoff fight than the fact that I got out of the challenge. It was finally getting good!
Sierra and Cody walked through the castle. “Don’t worry Cody. If ANY vampire or weird thing comes near you, I will fight them off for you!” Sierra declared.
“Wow, thanks Sierra!” Cody grinned.
“It’s for you...it’s ALL for you.” Sierra whispered into his ear. He began to tremble. Suddenly, the vampire came up behind and stuffed both of them into the sack.
Cody (CONF); Why exactly could we not get separate sacks?
Alejandro, Beth, and Sadie continued walking through the corridor. “I remember back on the Island, when people made fun of you for your braces, but you looked stunning then, and now...well, you are drop dead gorgeous!” Alejandro winked.
“Thanks! It’s all because of Dubin Orthodontics.” Beth smiled.
Alejandro looked irate. He put Beth’s arm in his and flexed.
“Wow, your arm is strong!” Beth complimented. Alejandro smiled. “My boyfriend Brady has SUCH strong arms. He’s pretty great.” Alejandro banged his head on the stone.
Alejandro (CONF): Of all the beautiful women here, Beth is the one that’s out of my league? BETH?
A vampire appeared behind Sadie and grabbed her. “AAAHHH!” She yelled. “Alejandro, help!”
“I have my own problems currently!” Alejandro said, as a vampire tried to stuff him into a sack as well. A third appeared and tried to grab Beth, but missed and knocked off her glasses.
“My glasses! I can’t see anything without my glasses!” Beth cried, stumbling out of the room as Alejandro and Sadie were captured.
A bat flew on DJ’s hand. “Aww, cute.” he squealed. “I think I’m gonna call you batty.”
“AND you lied about crying to go on the reward!” Harold cried.
“REALLY? That’s ancient history!” Leshawna yelled.
“These two are driving me batty.” DJ sniped to his bat.
“You know what, we’re through!” Harold yelled.
“We never even started!” Leshawna cried.
The gigantic green monster broke through the wall and into the room DJ, Harold, and Leshawna were in.
“This...is not good.” Harold gulped. DJ stood paralyzed with fear for five seconds.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran out of the room.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran down the hallway.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran past the laboratory.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran past the contestants already eliminated from the challenge.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran through a wall.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ ran through the room Geoff and Bridgette were in, stepping on a tile that made more walls drop down, trapping them inside.
DJ (CONF): Okay, maybe I got a liiiiittle spooked…
“Ooh, Bridgette and Geoff alone together with no escape? I think it’s time for a little…” Chris grinned.
“This is a duet, so no one but the lovebirds has to sing.” Chris chuckled.
“I’d like to hear what she has to say...or sing, I guess.” Geoff scoffed.
Bridgette: I’m...sorry. So sorry. Sorry like a flower...after the first frost. And I’m sorry like a mitten that has dropped and feels so….lost. *disco ball appears in the chamber and band appears behind her* Oops, I really messed up! At least I fessed up!
Geoff: You didn’t fess up, you got caught on TV!
“It’s international Geoff, Total Drama is seen all over the world!” Chris smiled.
Bridgette: But I’m sorry….so sorry. Sorry like a surfer who’s busted her board. And I’m...sorry like a band, when they play the wrong...chord. *disco ball falls again* Oops, I really screwed up! I felt some dude up!
Geoff: INTERnational TV! In front of all my friends!
Bridgette: But I’m sorry….so sorry! Geoff, I really think you rule. You’re so cute that you make me drool! And if you give me one more chance….I’ll do my happy, happy dance!
Geoff: You are really cute when you dance...oh, no, no!
Bridgette: Geoff, you’re the one for me. And I’m so incredibly, wildly, crazily….oh so completely, infinitely….beyond…..sorry.
“Are you really sorry?” Geoff asked, tearing up.
“Yes! I love you, Geoff. Let’s be us again!” Bridgette pleaded.
“I love you too, babe.” Geoff and Bridgette ran to each other, hugged, then immediately began making out, until the giant green monster broke through the door, followed by Eva and Justin chasing after it.
“Alright, let’s see if this works!” Justin yelled, running up to the monster and lightly tapping it on the back of the foot. “Well, I got nothing.”
“AAAAAAHHH!” Eva screamed as she ran up, punched the monster in the face multiple times, and kicked it in the stomach.
“I think you just rekilled the living dead.” Justin said, eyes widened.
The contestants stood in front of the castle. “Alright….that challenge…WAS AWESOME! We should throw you guys in dangerous places more often.” Chris smiled.
“You do. Like, every episode!” Gwen cried.
“Zip it. Anyway, since Eva and Justin killed the monster, Team Failure wins first class!” Chris announced. Team Failure cheered.
“That wasn’t even the point of the challenge!” Heather cried.
“True, but it was AWESOME!” Chris chuckled. “And since Geoff stayed alive the whole time, Team Chris is not going to elimination!” Team Chris cheered.
“What about Beth? She stayed alive the whole time too!” Courtney cried.
“Um...not quite. She got out a while ago, she just can’t find us.” Chris said, The contestants looked to their left, where Beth was in a field, glasses-less, wandering.
“Hello? Chris? Anyone?” Beth asked before walking into a tree.
“And since that means all of Team Cody was captured, you know what that means! Elimination for you guys.” Chris chuckled.
“Nice leadership, Cody.” Courtney scoffed.
“Hey, I never asked to be leader?” Cody asked.
“Maybe you won’t be for long.” Courtney glared.
“Yeah, because I AM!” Sadie announced. “That’s right, Alejandro said I was soooo qualified, so I’m Team Cody’s new leader!”
Gwen, Heather, and Courtney sat on the plane, discussing the vote. “I mean....it should be Cody, right?” Courtney said.
“It would make sense, but….how useful is blind Beth gonna be?” Heather asked.
“You can replace glasses. You can’t replace stupidity, which Sadie has in spades.” Gwen rolled her eyes. “And I’d rather stop her leading before it even starts.
The three sighed. Heather and Courtney walked away, and Alejandro came down to sit next to Gwen. “Can I ask a favor of you?” The latin boy asked.
“Team Cody. That challenge was a failure with a capital F, and someone’s taking the drop of shame for it! Who’s it gonna be?” Chris asked, then laughed.
Heather (CONF): *stamps passport pensively*
Sadie (CONF): *stamps passport angrily*
Sierra (CONF): OMG, I’m voting someone out of Total Drama! This is awesome! ...oh right, I have to actually vote someone off, don’t I?
Beth (CONF): *stamps camera* Is that right?
“Well, you’ve all voted. Some of us took more effort than others.” Chris glared at Beth, who smiled sheepishly.
“In my opinion, there’s a reason to send ALL of you home. Gwen, you were first out of the challenge, which is pretty pathetic. EZEKIEL beat you. Courtney, if you spent less time yelling, and more time leading, maybe Cody wouldn’t have taken your spot.” Chris smiled.
“He didn’t take my spot! I resigned!” Courtney insisted.
“Yeah, sure. Cody, you’ve proved you’re just as incompetent at leading as you are at women. Beth, no one wants a mole on their team, and with no glasses you kind of look like one.” Chris commented.
“Rude!” Beth said. “I’d be glaring at you if I could see.”
“Sadie, your leadership reign hasn’t started yet, and I’m already scared. Sierra, everyone’s scared about who you’re gonna go to next when Cody’s eliminated.” Sierra giggled and hugged the nerd, who mouthed ‘help me’. “And Heather….well, you’re just plain unpleasant.”
“I am a likable person!” Heather declared. The rest of the team laughed.
“Heather and Sierra got no votes.” Chris threw them barfbags. “Everyone else did. And the person taking the drop of shame is….
...Beth!” Chris announced.
“What?” Sadie said.
“What?” Sierra said.
“What?” Cody said.
“What?” Gwen said.
“What?” Beth said.
“What?” Chris said. “I mean I had the results, but that one was a doozy!
Alejandro (CONF): Beth was the only girl in the game not falling for my charm. So, I took the steps necessary to ensure she went home. First, I asked Gwen, the most approachable of the alliance to tell Courtney, who agreed because--
Courtney (CONF): Beth NEVER aligned with me at the film lot! Well, who’s laughing now!
Alejandro (CONF): Her animosity was enough fuel for her to tell Heather, who said yes because--
Heather (CONF): Beth BROKE our alliance on the island. Well, who’s laughing now?
Alejandro (CONF): And Heather informed the pathetic Cody, who agreed because…
Cody (CONF): At this point, I’ll vote for anyone who’s not me. The leadership thing didn’t go over too well.
Alejandro (CONF): This all results in one booted Beth, one confused team, and one Alejandro in full control of a whole other team!
“But...I’ve analyzed TD votes for years? It just doesn’t make sense!” Sierra cried.
“Sorry, Beth.” Gwen said, sympathetically.
“You were shockingly tolerable this time around.” Heather commented.
“Thanks…” Beth said, putting on her parachute. “Can I have my glasses back? I can’t really seEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” Chris pushed her out of the plane.
“Well, that’s one wannabee down, 18 more freakshows to go. Who will go home next? Find out next time on Total...Drama...World Tour!”
Chapter Seven- Slap Slap Revolution
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, things got SERIOUSLY batty in Transylvania! Eva connected back to her roots….those roots happening to be a horrific monster! Gwen and Trent connected back to their former problems, and decided to be friends. And Harold tried to reconnect back to Leshawna. Key word- TRIED. In the end, the only thing Cody led his team to was a loss. And Alejandro’s triple cross frontside against Beth was so complex that I didn’t know what the heck happened- all I know is she’s OUTTA here! Now, there are 19 left, and things are about to get COLD in Germany. Who’s getting leder-hosed today? Find out right here, on Total...Drama...World Tour!”
Team Failure sat in first class eating drumsticks. “Who knew goat was so good, eh?” Ezekiel said, chomping in.
“Local delicacy.” Eva said, biting into hers.
“Emphasis on delicacy!” DJ mumbled, his mouth full of meat.
Bridgette snuck in from the loser class door, trying to go unnoticed. “And where have you been?” Justin questioned.
“Nowhere, I just...had to go to the bathroom!” Bridgette grinned, unconvincingly.
“All night?” Leshawna questioned. Bridgette stared at the ground.
Bridgette (CONF): Okay, MAYBE I had a late night make out session with Geoff. But can you blame me? I’m just so happy we’re back together and he doesn’t hate me anymore!
Justin leaned over to DJ and Ezekiel. “Going for make out sessions with people on the other team is a serious no-no.” he said.
“Yeah, eh. Why is Bridgette kissing people OTHER than me! I mean...why is she kissing people in general? Not me. I have nothing to do with this. I am removed from the situation.” Ezekiel said. DJ and Justin looked at each other then stared at him.
In loser class, Team Chris sat minding their own business. Suddenly, Alejandro stood up in front of them.
“I am so proud of us for not losing last time. You all did a wonderful job. But just ‘not losing’ isn’t enough. This is a team full of champions, and champions do not get second best. Champions win! Champions rule the roost! And amigos, we ARE champions! So we WILL be in first class next time!” Alejandro declared, dramatically. All of Team Chris clapped, even Noah begrudgingly. Gwen, Courtney, Cody, Sierra, and Sadie clapped as well. Heather glared at Courtney.
“What? It was inspirational.” Courtney said.
“Alright guys, we’re gonna kick butt and win today, right!” Heather announced.
“Probably not.” Cody said.
“We’re pretty weak.” Gwen added.
“Alejandro’s was better.” Courtney critiqued.
Heather (Cockpit CONF): I cannot believe that everyone thinks that Jerkejandro is better than me! He’s sooooo transparent, and his team loves him! What gives?
“Well, he’s a tolerable human, for starters.” Chef commented.
“I think I like the bathroom camera better!” Heather complained.
“It’s okay guys, because I’M leading now, so we WILL win!” Sadie declared.
Sadie (CONF): Alejandro gave me the confidence I needed in Transylvania, I am going to rule this team! And I don’t even need Katie here!
The 19 remaining contestants stood in the plane lobby. “Guten tag!” Chris said, coming out in lederhosen.
“Does anyone have any eye bleach I could use?” Noah asked.
“Welcome to the German Alps!” Chris grinned. “These beautiful snowy mountains are where today’s challenges will take place!”
Sierra (CONF): OMG, Germany! I’m like a quarter german! I’m so happy after Transylvania we’re going somewhere fun! Nothing bad’s ever happened here!
“So what ARE today’s challenges?” Trent asked.
“And why aren’t you telling us them when we land like normal?” Eva asked.
“Well, you see, this is avalanche country so we can’t really land…which brings us to your first challenge!” Chris grinned, and threw a walkie-talkie at Ezekiel, which promptly hit him in the face.
“Ow!” Ezekiel said.
“Oh, I wouldn’t be saying ow now. Since we can’t land….” Chris pulled a lever, the floor dropped out, and all 19 contestants fell out of the plane screaming.
“Leshawna, if this is where we die, I just want to say--” Harold began as everyone fell out of the plane.
Alejandro pushed Harold to fall further downwards “...I just want to say that you look ravishing today, Leshawna. Gorgeous as always.” Alejandro smiled.
Leshawna (CONF): That Alejandro is FINE. As for Harold...well, let’s just say him being pushed down did NOT affect Leshawna.
“I love you!” Bridgette called to Geoff.
“I love you too!” Geoff called to Bridgette.
“Get a room!” Justin said, falling below them. All 19 contestants landed in an incredibly soft snow bank, not feeling the impact of the fall at all.
“That feels nice, eh!” Ezekiel commented, causing the entire mountain to shake. Everyone glared at him as the walkie-talkie turned on.
“That brings us to your first challenge. Any loud noises will set off a huge avalanche here, which is why yours truly is landing the plane somewhere safe.” Chris smugly informed the contestants. “And as for you guys….”
“Really?” Noah whispered.
“Hope some of you can be piano instead of fortissimo. See ya!” The light on the walkie talkie turned off.
All: Keep it down so we can win the loot!
Sadie: (turning to Heather) Talk just once, and you’re getting the boot!
Harold: Boot on, but you’re still out of luck! You suck the lemon chuck!
Justin: Wait til you’re voted out for being such a lout!
Ezekiel: We’ll dance a jig when Chris shoves you off the plane.
Alejandro: (turning to Leshawna and dancing with her) When you don’t hold back and lead the pack, truly there is nothing stopping you, you you.
Leshawna: Swimming in your eyes is butterflies and suddenly there’s nothing I can’t do! *turns to camera* Sorry mom!
Heather: *turns to team rousingly* Hey, something’s itching in my brain! Our team can win the game! Yes--
“HEY LOOK, A BIRD!” Ezekiel called, pointing at a dove flying above the cast. Suddenly, the mountain shook uncontrollably, and snow and ice sent the entire cast tumbling down the mountain.
Heather (CONF): Really? When he rallies his team he gets claps, when I do I get interrupted by a homeschooled boy and trapped in an avalanche!
“Nice going EZEKIEL.” Harold scoffed. “The next boot should be easy.”
“Really, I think there are OTHER targets.” Justin stared at Bridgette.
“Yeah, SOME people need to go.” Leshawna looked at Harold.
DJ (CONF): Sometimes I feel like my team might be just a biiit unstable.
“Welcome to Germany, contestants!” Chris grinned. “Land of chocolate, ice, and lots of scary people. Today’s first challenge is called Total...Drama...Sausage!”
“Doing well on the non-suggestive front I see.” Noah rolled his eyes.
“Each team will get about 15 pounds of raw meat. You’ll have to process it through the official Total Drama meat grinder!” Chris brought out a meat grinder with his face on it.
Noah (CONF): This is ridiculous. Chris is so transparent and dumb. *smiles* But you know what's not dumb? The Total Drama meat grinder, only 50 dollars in stores now! *resumes frowning* Sorry, that's in my contract.
“You'll have to mold that meat into a big juicy sausage!” Chris grinned.
“You are….not making this better for yourself.” Trent said.
“Yeah, whatever. After you make the sausage, you race down the mountain. First team down the mountain wins an advantage in part 2.” Chris announced. “Get molding!”
Heather stood in front of the meat grinder. “Alright team, who’s ready to win and kick some Failure and Chris butts!” Heather encouraged. No one on Team Cody moved an inch.
Sadie pushed Heather out of the way. “WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING? We have a CHALLENGE to do! Start grinding!” Sadie ordered. The rest of Team Cody immediately began working.
Heather (CONF): Okay, now they listen to SADIE over me?
“Okay guys, we need to stop making googoo eyes at the OTHER team and start making some sausages!” Harold declared to Team Failure..
“Um, no one’s making googoo eyes at ANYONE, skinny.” Leshawna glared at Harold.
“Really, because as I recall a CERTAIN SOMEONE--” Harold began.
“I don’t care about your relationship drama. Start grinding!” Eva declared, shoving the meat into the grinder.
Harold (CONF): Leshawna flirting with Alejandro RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME is just so…..gosh! Women now. Remember when all you had to do was scale a tower and slay a dragon? Those were the days.
“Ugh, this is dumb.” Noah complained, shoving meat into the grinder.
“I think you just need to get the hang of it, amigo.” Alejandro said, as he effortlessly shoved meat in and it came out perfectly.
“Woah, Al.” Trent smiled.
“That was awesome!” Geoff grinned.
“You somehow made Noah look WORSE then he normally does!” Duncan chuckled.
Noah (Cockpit CONF): Okay, so apparently shoving meat into grinders isn’t my thing. And maybe Alejandro has a lot of special skills, but I have special skills too!
“Like what?” Chef questioned.
“Well...complaining about Alejandro. That counts, right?” Noah questioned.
Geoff shoved some meat into the grinder, and then looked over at Bridgette who was doing the same thing at Team Failures. The two stared at each other, and then walked over and began to make out passionately. Alejandro grabbed Geoff and pulled him back to Team Chris’s station.
“You must focus, compadre. I know that there are some beautiful women here--” Alejandro paused to wink at Leshawna, who blushed. “But you must be strong and not give into temptation.”
“Yeah, I get it. It’s just that we’ve been apart for so long…” Geoff said.
“It’s been 3 days, friend.” Alejandro said, with a raised eyebrow.
“Yeah, the longest three days of my life!” Geoff cried indignantly. “You’re right...I’m focusing on my team from now on!”
Geoff (CONF): Alejandro’s such a good leader. Him telling me not to think about Bridgette is great advice, and I’m really following it!
Bridgette knocked on the confessional door, then opened it and began making out passionately with Geoff.
“You’ve got 5 minutes! Better start molding!” Chris yelled over the loudspeaker.
“Alright, who wants to mold. I think I should supervise.” Heather said.
“Um, you? I’m the one with CIT experience here!” Courtney argued.
“I’m the team’s LEADER!” Sadie challenged.
“Well Cody was the leader before anyone!” Sierra cried.
“Sierra, if you’re so eager, you could go ahead on and do it…” Cody said, trying to slip as far into the background as he could.
“Oh my god, I just finished it, you psychos!” Gwen yelled, walking in front of her perfectly crafted sausage.
“Good work, Gwen.” Courtney smiled.
“Could have been better work if I supervised it!” Sadie cried.
Gwen (CONF): Me doing something helpful for the team? Courtney complimenting me? SADIE leading us? Did I slip onto an episode of the Twilight Zone?
“This is...pathetic,” Eva said, looking at their sausage.
“Goodbye first class….” Harold lamented.
“Goodbye gourmet meals…” DJ sighed.
“Goodbye pedicures…” Justin sounded on the verge of tears.
“Guys! Chris never specified the shape the sausage has to be in!” Bridgette cried. She jjumped on and flattened their sausage. “We’re not riding down- we’re surfing!”
“Good job, Bridgette!” Eva clapped.
“Wow, I think that’s first nice thing I’ve heard you say.” Justin commented. “Like, ever.”
Bridgette (CONF): People think I’m just Geoff’s arm candy, but I am so much more! I am a PLAYER in this game. Me and Geoff can do well seperately!
Geoff knocked on the confessional door and entered and him and Bridgette began to passionately make out.
“You know...our sausage is not looking too thick.” Trent said, looking down.
“Dude, phrasing.” Duncan said.
“Let me attempt to remedy.” Alejandro grabbed the sausge and molded into a perfect shape. His team clapped.
Noah (CONF): WhatEVER. I can play with sausages too, y’know. NOT like that…strictly in a challenge sense!
The teams were lined up with their sausages on display. “Team Cody, looking good. Team Failure, don’t really know what’s going on there. Looking a little soft. Team Chris, nice and big! That’s what I like to see.” Chris smiled. “Ready to race em?”
“I was born ready!” Tyler cried. “EXTREME!” He pumped his fist, but somehow slipped and rolled all the way down the mountain, landing flat on his face on the cold hard ice at the bottom.
“I’m good!” he called up to his team.
“Alright teams...on your marks, get ready, sausage!” Chris cried. The three teams began racing.
Cody’s Angels got out to an early lead. “Alright, team! We’re doing great!” Gwen cheered. She was then hit in the face by a tree branch. “That doesn’t even make geographical sense!”
“Did I forget to mention the obstacles?” Chris called. “Cause there’s that.”
“This surfing idea was great, Bridgette!” DJ said as Team Failure barreled down the mountain towards the finish line.
DJ saw a baby goat and picked up. “Awww...cute….I’m gonna name you Gertrude.” he smiled. Chris threw a block of ice at it. “Gertrude!”
The goat landed and began to walk away. “Watch out for that rock!” Duncan yelled, and steered Team Chris’s sausage directly into the goat.
“WHYYYYYYYY?” DJ cried.
Team Failure surfed down the finish line. “Yes!” Bridgette cheered. Team Cody slid in after, and Team Chris in last.
“Team Failure wins part 1!” Chris announced. Six of the team members cheered, but DJ was still mourning.
“She was so young...mama…” DJ sobbed. Eva slapped him in the face.
“Be a man!” she ordered.
“Second is not good enough. We need to WIN!” Sadie cried.
Sadie (CONF): I’m soooo happy Alejandro gave me the confidence I needed! I think my team is really starting to respect me!
Cody (CONF): Yeah, Sadie’s horrifying. And I hang out with Sierra.
“Congratulations on your win, my lady. I’m sure many more are in store.” Alejandro smiled at Leshawna.
“Oh, sugar.” Leshawna grinned back. Harold seethed a few feet away.
“Now, it’s time for part two. De slap slap revolution!” Chris announced.
“The say what now?” Leshawna questioned.
“You’ll each be on one of those dance pad...thingies.” Chris said, staring up at the dance pads that were 20 feet off the ground. ‘You’ll have to slap your opponent from the other team off. And I’d watch out for the electrical shocks...they can be a REAL bummer. Team Failure, since you won part 1, all of your team competes. Only 5 Team Cody’s get to play, and a measly 4 from Team Chris Is Really Really Really Really disappointed in your performance. Pick your players!”
“Okay, so one of us has to sit out.” Gwen said.
“I think it should be Cody. I don’t know if he can take it, my little snuggy bunny!” Sierra squeezed Cody until he sounded like he was about to choke.
“Um, why are we sitting out the only guy on our team?” Courtney questioned.
“Women are just as strong as men. Stop living in the past, Courtney.” Heather smiled. Courtney flipped her off.
“I’m the leader, and what I say GOES. Cody’s not playing.” Sadie declared.
“So, I don’t think Tyler’s in any position to play.” Duncan said, looking down to the floor.
“Extreme!” Tyler yelled to no one in particular.
“Noah, you are more...petite than the rest of us. Why not take this rest, compadre.” Alejandro said.
“No, I’m competing.” Noah declared.
“I’m fine with sitting out, bro.” Geoff said, sitting down.
“Very well then.” Alejandro said, glancing at Noah.
Noah (CONF): Al thinks I’m a weak physical competitor, and I’m gonna prove him wrong! Only problem is...I am a weak physical competitor.
The contestants stood up on the dance pads, paired off. “Ready...set...dance fight!” Chris announced.
Harold was paired off with Gwen and they were doing the steps. “You don’t want me to use my mad skills against you. I went to Boogie Steve’s Dancing Camp.” Harold said proudly. “You might as well give up now.”
Gwen kicked him off the platform. “Or I could just do that!”
“Where’s your respect for the art? Gosh!” Harold cried.
Bridgette and Heather danced. “Hey Bridgette, don’t you want to be down there...with your dear boyfriend Geoff?” Heather said, looking compassionate.
“No, I’d rather win for my team!” Bridgette declared.
“Ugh, I wanted this to be easy.” Heather complained. The two got into a slap fight until Bridgette eventually fell off.
“Don’t mess with me, homes! I’m from the hood, yo!” Ezekiel yelled at Trent, who he was dancing with. “I grew up on the STREETS!”
“Weren’t you homeschooled on a farm?” Trent replied quizzicallly.
“Yes, BUT...that’s not the point here!” Ezekiel cried. Trent hit him off with just one touch.
Leshawna danced with Duncan. “Hah, this should be easy.” Duncan chuckled.
“I’m rooting for you!” Alejandro called to both.
“Hey, thanks ma--” Duncan began. Leshawna knocked him off the platform.
“He was talking to ME!” she yelled
Duncan (CONF): A. Since when is Alejandro and Leshawna a thing, and B. Since when is Leshawna a total psycho?
“As a CIT, I know how to legally paralyze a man in five different ways!” Courtney threatened, dancing with DJ.
“Why do you need to know that?” DJ questioned. Courtney stopped in thought.
“I don’t really know.” Courtney and DJ stared off in deep thought for a good amount of time, then she grabbed his neck and shoved it down.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” DJ screamed.
“This is #3!” Courtney informed.
DJ (CONF) *neck brace on, crying* I…*sniffles* hate this show….
Sierra danced with Noah. She got into the rhythm and began to sing.
Sierra: 1, 2, 3, slap my knee! My husband to be, his name is Cody! 4, 5, 6, pick up sticks! My heart won’t tick without my cody fix! 7 8 9, straighten your spine! Spin to see Cody looking so FINE! 10, 11, 12, nothing rhymes with twelve. Chicks want Cody but his butt’s MINE! Cody stared on in horror.
Cody (CONF): It was flattering...then it got weird...and now I want to her get voted out VERY soon!
“Hey, Sierra...look at Cody...on the ground...sad...alone...with no one to talk to him…” Noah said, looking sadly on the skinny boy.
“You’re right! How could I ask to compete without him? I’M COMING CODY!” Sierra lept off the platform and embraced Cody in a bone-crushing round.
Noah (CONF): I won a round! I didn’t do any actual fighting, but I won a round!
Sadie danced feverishly. “Ooh, I love this game!” she squealed. “I mean….I’ll crush you!” she changed her demeanor to be threatening. Eva picked her up and threw her off the platform.
Sadie (CONF) *black eye* Leading is hard….
Justin and Alejandro danced. “Ah...so here it is…mano y mano, hot guy y hot guy.” Justin said.
“My friend….” Alejandro leaned in to whisper “...we are not evne in the same league.” He slapped Justin off and sent him flying into the snow.
“My face! My glorious face!” Justin cried.
Justin (CONF): Not on the same level? NOT ON THE SAME LEVEL? Ladies and gentlemen, I think I just found my next TARGET! After Bridgette...and Harold...I need to start having less vendettas, huh?
“Alrighty then! Gwen, Heather, Courtney, Leshawna, Eva, Al, Noah, and Trent move on to the next round.” Chris announced. “New matchups!”
Gwen danced with Leshawna “Man, this season’s crazy, huh?” Gwen laughed.
“You’re telling me.” Leshawna chuckled.
“Remember when this show had challenges like ‘put on a talent show’? Now it’s slap each other on a giant platform in Germany.” Gwen rolled her eyes as Leshawna laughed. “And the newbies...Sierra’s crazy, and Alejandro’s so--”
“Don’t be talkin about ALEJANDRO!” Leshawna yelled, slapping Gwen off the platform angrily.
Gwen (CONF): Okay Leshawna, I’m pretty sure one of the rules of friendship is don’t slap your friend over a random boy!
Noah squared off with Heather. “Ugh…” Heather groaned, looking at Leshawna flirting with Alejandro.
“I know, right? Way to be subtle.” Noah scoffed.
“They make me sick.” Heather complained. Noah tripped Heather as she danced, and she fell into the snow.
Heather (CONF): How dare he use complaining against me! That’s my favorite pastime!
Alejandro squared off with Courtney. “You look lovely, muchacha.” Alejandro smiled.
“Don’t compliment me!” Courtney cried. “I know 5 ways to paralyze a man!”
“And you won’t need to use any of them. I’m rooting for your team. Hit me and I’ll fall off.” Alejandro whispered.
“Really?” Courtney questioned. She lightly touched him and he fell. “Thanks, I guess.”
Courtney (CONF): Alejandro falling off was so gentlemanly...but I won’t get soft because of it! But it WAS a nice gesture...it’s good to know SOMEONE’S kind on this show!
Alejandro (CONF): Courtney’s a strong competitor. I would rather have her as a friend than an enemy...for now. *smirks*
“And that’s one Cody, one Chris, and one Failure in the finals! Who will be the last one to join the--” Chris began.
“AHHHHHH!” Trent flew through the air into a snow bank. Eva licked her lips.
“Well, that’s another failure.” Chris chuckled. “Time for the finals!”
The four remaining contestants stood on one large dance pad. “This is...strange.” Noah said.
“Yes. Yes, it is.” Chris agreed. “The four of you will fight in a no holds barred melee. Last team with a member standing is flying first class. First team to lose all their members is going to elimination, where one of your members is going to learn a lot about german culture.” Chris chuckled.
“Go!” Chris blew the airhorn.
“Let’s get her.” Leshawna grinned as her and Eva walked towards Courtney.
“Noah, hang back and let them duke it out.” Alejandro called.
“Thanks, but shockingly I DO have a brain that can function without your help.” Noah called back. Leshawna turned back.
“Are you sassing MY Alejandro?” Leshawna questioned. “MINE?” Leshawna jumped on Noah and began slapping him viciously, so much that his tooth flew out and landed in Trent’s hand.
“Ooh, gnarly.” Duncan chuckled.
Eva picked Courtney up. “Let go of me! As a CIT I learned five different ways to paralyze a--” Eva threw her into a snow bank.
Leshawna was still slapping Noah until Eva ran over and tried to pull her off. “What’s the matter with you?” she questioned. Leshawna let go but it caused both girls to fly off the platform.
“AND THAT’S A FIRST CLASS TRIP FOR TEAM CHRIS!” Chris grinned.
“Ahy did it? Ahy did it!” Noah smiled.
“That was awesome, bro!” Geoff smiled.
“Ihs everyting spinning or is that just meh?” Noah said, before passing out.
“Team Failure may need to get their crap together,” The team all glared at Leshawna. “But they are NOT going to elimination. As for Team Cody...yet another one of you is taking the drop of shame tonight. FIgure out who it is.”
Leshawna (CONF): I feel terrible for what I did to Noah...you know...I can’t believe I went to that length for Alejandro! Sure he’s cute, but he didn’t even talk to me afterwards! Maybe HE’s the snake and not Bridgette...
Gwen, Heather, and Courtney sat in loser class sighing. “Who should go home?” Gwen questioned.
“It HAS to be Sadie. She can NOT lead this team. End of discussion.” Heather said, walking away.
“Way to be democratic.” Courtney rolled her eyes.
Sadie ran up to Gwen and Courtney. “It HAS to be Heather. Haven’t you both like, hated her for two seasons? This is your chance to send her home! Do it!” Sadie ordered and then skipped off. “I’m so good at this game.”
“Which dictator do we take out?” Gwen questioned.
“I don’t know.” Courtney shrugged. “I never thought I’d be flying over Germany discussing strategy with Gwen, but here we are.”
Cody ran up to Gwen and Courtney. “Hello, ladies.” he said, as suavely as he could be.
“What do you WANT?” Courtney questioned.
“Woah, hold the aggression.” Cody said. “I’m just saying, instead of pissing off one of the leaders, there’s always someone else we could boot….” The camera panned to Sierra, staring at Bridgette and taking notes for her blog.
At the elimination ceremony, Team Cody sat dejectedly. “Wow, congrats guys. You’ll officially be the worst team in the game after this vote! I hope you’re proud.” Chris grinned. “Go vote.”
Heather (CONF): *stamps Sadie’s passport* I’M the leader.
Sadie (CONF): *stamps Heather’s passport* I’M the leader. *squeals* Having confidence is sooooo fetch!
Cody (CONF): *stamps Sierra’s passport* Pleeeeease go home. Pleeeeeeease. For my sake.
Gwen (CONF): *stamps passport pensively*
“Alright. Votes are in. Barfbags for...Gwen!” Chris threw a bag at the goth, which she caught happily. “Courtney and Cody are also safe.”
The bottom 3 sat nervously. “Sadie, you’re newly obnoxious. Heather, you’ve always been obnoxious. And Sierra….yikes. The person going home tonight is….
Sadie!” Chris threw barfbags to Heather and Courtney.
“Aww, but I thought I was doing good. I guess I shouldn’t have confidence in myself and lead.” Sadie frowned.
“No, you should! Just...not in this context!” Gwen smiled fakely.
“I guess my life goals should always to be an indistinguishable part of a shallow pair!” Sadie smiled.
“I really don’t think that’s the takeaway here.” Courtney said, attempting ot be encouraging.
“Welp, back to being part of a group that no one in the fanbase cares about. Bye!” Sadie said, jumping out of the plane.
“Well that was….depressing.” Chris said nonchalantly, before turning to the camera. “There’s 18 left, and it’s anyone’s game! Who’s taking a trip out of a plane next. Find out next time on Total….Drama….World Tour!”
Chapter Eight- The Am-AH-Zon Race
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our contestants said guten tag to Germany! Leshawna fell under Alejandro’s spell, big time. And Noah proved his worth to his team...and it only cost him a tooth, and all of his dignity. And on Team Cody, Sadie’s newfound confidence under Alejandro was nice, but her new leadership plans certainly weren’t, leading her to get the boot! Now, there are 18 people left, and our next location is sure to drive them bananas! Who will get in a rumble in the jungle? And who will be the next drop-ee? Find out, right here, right now on Total...Drama...World Tour!”
Team Chris sat in first class. “This is excellent, friends! I’m so proud of us.” Alejandro smiled while eating chocolates.
“Yeah, this is awesome, dudes!” Geoff griinned.
“Thanks for taking one for the team, Noah!” Tyler said to an in-pain Noah, who was treating his injuries.
“Thanks. I can’t feel my face, but thanks.” Noah mumbled.
Alejandro (CONF): Noah winning for us was terrible for my game. He’s my next target, and now the team thinks he’s worth something. So my mission today has to be to ensure that HE’S the one who messes up the challenge for us. *laughs*
Team Failure sat 6 in a row, with Leshawna on the very end. “So can someone fill me in on why we’re not talking to Leshawna?” DJ questioned.
“Because she almost killed someone for a boy. I’m super hot, and no girl’s done that for me.” Justin stated.
Justin (CONF): Leshawna finding Alejandro so hot that she beat up Noah was super funny. But also concerning. I’M the hot one, and him being that good to get her to do anything for him. Threat. They’re both going on my target list.
Justin wrote Alejandro and Leshawna’s names over Harold and Bridgette’s. “I really should cut this down, huh?
Leshawna sat on the end of the bench. “So, Eva, how’s your li--” Eva stood up and walked away as Leshawna sighed.
Leshawna (CONF): I feel AWFUL. I can’t believe I let myself get that crazy over a BOY. And poor Harold….even though me and that boy are NOT together, I know how much it probably hurt him. I think he’s taking it well, at least.
Harold (CONF): *crying*
Cody’s Angels sat in loser class. Sierra clutched Cody as Gwen, Heather, and Courtney all slept. A rat fell from the ceiling into Gwen’s mouth. “Ugh, gross!” she complained.
Gwen (CONF): You know, I thought maybe this season would go better than last, but I’m stuck with a stalker, a witch, the bossiest person you’ll EVER meet, and Cody. The drop of shame isn’t looking too bad right now!
“Okay team, we need to WIN today. And I’m not talking about that second place bullcrap. We need to get FIRST place.” Heather ordered.
“Who made you the queen?” Courtney questioned.
“I did. And I’d reccomend you listen to me, unless you want to follow Sadie.” Heather smiled. Courtney stuck her tongue out.
Courtney (CONF): I’d like to remind Heather that we are in an ALLIANCE. Alliances are a democracy! I think that she needs to start caring about MY opinion.
Heather (CONF): I don’t care about Courtney’s opinion.
The contestants exited the plain, into an extremely humid jungle.
“Oh great, another place where I can get life-threatening injuries!” Noah rolled his eyes, then tripped over a step getting off the plane and faceplanted.
Noah (CONF): When did I become Tyler?
Tyler did a flip out of the plane “EXTREEEEEEEME!” he cried, and then crashed straight into a tree.
“Just can’t beat the original.” Noah smirked as Tyler slid down the tree.
“Where are we? It’s like a thousand degrees!” Heather complained.
“Welcome to Brazil! AKA, The Amazon rainforest!” Chris announced.
“The Amazon! So many pretty animals….” DJ sighed happily. A monkey then jumped down from a tree and began punching him in the face.
“Anyway, today’s challenge is a marathon!” Chris grinned as the cast looked on in shock.
“You HAVE to be kidding me.” Gwen said in disbelief.
“Nope! You’ll spend all day and night crossing the Amazon, filled with dangerous natives AND dangerous animals all the way across the border to Machu Pichu, Peru!” Chris laughed.
“Aw man, this’ll be easy! I run cross country!” Tyler flexed.
“Tyler….that’s not what cross country means.” Trent sighed.
“It isn’t? Woah….I always wondered why the US looked just like Canada.” Tyler said.
Chris threw supplies at the teams. “There’s your map and compass! First team to get to Peru rides first class, and last team to get there has a date with me at elimination, where one of you will get to skydive for the first time!” Chris chuckled.
“Um, yeah, I sort of have life-threatening allergies. Can I get an epipen or something?” Cody asked.
“Do you know what show you’re on?” Chris asked, and then blew the airhorn. “Go!”
All three teams raced for about two minutes, before finding a fork in the road. “Which way do we go?” Geoff asked.
“As team leader of Team Cody, I believe we should go rig-” Courtney began.
“We’re going left!” Heather announced, and the rest of her team followed her.
Courtney (Cockpit CONF): WHY are they listening to her? Did she take a direction and path-taking course as a CIT? I didn’t think so!
Chef stared at her.
“What! It was a very thorough camp!” Courtney defended.
“Traveling in groups is safer.” Alejandro said to his team.
“And if it ends up being the wrong way, we can still beat the chicks.” Duncan pointed out. Team Chris shrugged and began running left.
“If they both go left and we go right, we have a 66 percent chance of winning!” Justin smiled. “Math.”
Bridgette (CONF): At least he’s pretty!
Team Failure walked slowly. “Um, pick up the PACE people. We need to WIN!” Heather yelled.
“‘It’s not a race, it’s a MARATHON. You have to pace yourself.” Courtney commented.
“You know what you do in both a race AND a marathon? Run.” Heather said, completely deadpan. Courtney rolled her eyes.
A mosquito flew by Cody. “AAAAAAH!” he screamed, and jumped into Sierra’s arms.
Cody (Cockpit CONF): You know, I’m pretty brave about most things but...I’m like super allergic to bee stings and bug bites. And they may….sorta...kinda...horrify me.
“I’m sorry, did you just say you were brave?” Chef questioned, and then began laughing hysterically. Cody sighed.
“Not every bug that flies by has malaria, Cody.” Gwen chuckled.
“Don’t worry Cody, if you get bitten, I’ll be your epipen!” Sierra smiled and then whispered in his ear. “I’ll INSERT myself in you”
Sierra (CONF): I have to start making moves on Cody! A rainforest is like….the perfect place for love! That’s a thing right?
Cody (CONF): At first, having Sierra was cool. A girl who likes me? And I didn’t have to pay for her? Sweet, right! But she’s a total creep! Last night, I woke up and she was sniffing my SHOE.
Team Chris walked at a leisurely pace. “Shouldn’t we like, try and pass the girls?” Tyler questioned.
“Not right now, compadre. Slow and steady wins the race, you know.” Alejandro said. Tyler shrugged.
“No, I think Tyler’s right. We should get moving! Come on boys!” Noah announced, and he and Tyler began running. Geoff followed, and Duncan and Trent shrugged and went on after them. Alejandro scowled.
Alejandro (CONF): How dare that little nuisance undermine MY leadership! If this were real life I could easily smash his face in and dispose of him...but sadly, here I have to be more cunning than that. But he WILL get his….believe me!
Noah (CONF): Undermining Alejandro was easily the best part of my day….maybe of the whole game! Now I just have to turn my team against him….which shouldn’t be difficult considering my team.
“Alejandro’s being a bit of a buzzkill by not running with us…..jocks, huh?” Noah cringed.
“Nah, Al’s probably just conserving energy, he could crush you in running, easy!” Tyler smiled.
“This running seems out of character for Noah, no? He doesn’t seem like the type.” Alejandro commented to Duncan.
“I prefer athletic Noah to annoying, whiny Noah any day.” Duncan shrugged.
Duncan (CONF): To be perfectly honest, I think Alejandro is slimy. I mean, I hate Noah too, but it’s a familiar hate. Alejandro...I just don’t trust the guy.
Team Failure walked along the right path. “Are you sure we’re going the right way?” Bridgette asked. Justin shrugged
“Let me see the map.” Leshawna ordered DJ.
“All the map has on it is “Step 1. Go to Macchu Picchu. Step 2. Win.” DJ looked at it closer, btu there was nothing else on it.
“No worries, Bridge, if anything comes for you, I’ll fight it off!” Ezekiel promised.
“Thanks, Zeke!” Bridgette smiled.
Leshawna took Bridgette aside. “Are you seriously flirting with ANOTHER boy?” Leshawna asked.
“What are you talking about?” Bridgette questioned.
“He’s obviously into you!” Leshawna said.
“Who?” Bridgette asked, still confounded.
“Girl, are you a banana short of a bunch? EZEKIEL!” Leshawna sighed.
Bridgette stared. “Ezekiel? Ew!” she said.
“Exactly! Why are you humoring him?” Leshawna questioned.
“I’m not! Well, not in that way! He’s just...nice!” Bridgette defended. “And are you in a position to give ME relationship advice?”
“What happens to me and my relationships is not relevant to this conversation!” Leshawna defended.
“Leshawna, can you stop slandering my name and get going!” Harold called. Leshawna flipped him off.
“Come on guys, let’s stop fighting and be positive! We can do it! Let’s go!” DJ smiled and began running forward. Five men in masks appeared out of the bushes with spears in their hands. DJ fainted.
Team Cody and Team Chris both arrived at a giant zipline, with Chris standing at the platform. “Hey kids! Guess what you’re doing next!” he grinned.
Heather (CONF): I hate this show.
“And just in case you were wondering, no, you can’t advance until EVERY member of your team is across.” Chris added. “Have fun.”
“I took a ziplining course as a CIT. Just follow my lead, and we will claim victor--” Courtney was interrupted by Sierra rushing by, cradling Cody with one hand and ziplining down with the other.
Cody’s face landed in the water and was viciously bitten by pirahnas. “LAY OFF MY CODY!” Sierra yelled, and began throwing the fish, that landed on Noah and Tyler and began biting them. Sierra and Cody landed on the finish platform.
Cody (CONF): Yeah, I’m REALLY over this whole Sierra thing.
Trent grabbed the zipline and Tyler jumped on it with him. “EXTREEEME!” Tyler yelled, propelling the zipline to incredible speed and sending both flying into a tree.
“I’m okay!” Tyler gave a thumbs up.
“I’m not.” Trent groaned.
“This is MY zipline. Get your own!” Heather yelled at Courtney.
“Um, it’s actually MY zipline!” Courtney said. “I was here first!”
“Well I was here LAST!” Heather fired back.
“That doesn’t even make sense!” Courtney attempted to wrestle the bar from Heather’s hands. Gwen sighed and kicked both of them off the platform, sending them careening with the zipline and both ending up in the piranha infested water.
“Heh, nice one.” Duncan fistbumped Gwen. Courtney glared from the water. “I mean, oh no!” Duncan feigned worry and got on the zipline to save her.
Alejandro got a running start and bounded from the opening platform to the ending one.
Noah (CONF): That’s not even physically possible!
“That’s a great idea!” Geoff grinned, and then jumped straight into the water.
“Geoff, no!” Trent called. Everyone was silent for a few seconds, until Geoff emerged, with pirahnas futilely biting his pecs.
Geoff (CONF): I guess my bod’s so chiseled the pirahnas couldn’t cut through it! That’s why you never skip chest day.
Gwen grabbed the zipline bar and started going, but the bar broke off halfway through.
“Well that’s just great.” Gwen sighed and swam away from the piranhas.
Noah stared down at the water. “This is gonna suck.” he sighed.
Noah (CONF) (piranhas biting all over him) I hate this show.
Team Failure is tied up against a tree. “Who are you?” Eva asked.
The Zing-Zings responded in a foreign language “Don’t know why I asked.” Eva rolled her eyes.
“Right path was really a good choice, HUH?” Leshawna glared at Justin.
“At least I don’t emotionally abuse poor souls.” Justin said, putting his hand on Harold’s shoulder.
“Don’t you hate me?” Harold questioned. Justin shrugged.
Chris walked by the tied up-teens. “Hey, guys!” he said.
“Thank god, you’re here to save us!” Bridgette let out a sigh of relief.
“Hahaha, no I’m not!” Chris grinned. “If someone gets impaled, call me. But up until then, this is awesome TV! And for good measure…”
“Really?” Bridgette questioned.
“Um, yeah! Gotta preserve the drama for all it’s worth. And how to do that better then a Team Failure solo?” Chris chuckled.
Bridgette: We should’ve just gone left, we wouldn’t be in this mess!
Leshawna: I said so too, then Justin went and lead us to our end!
Harold: And as we’re getting bitten….
DJ (crying): Our obituary’s written!
Eva: Oh, what will we do then!
Ezekiel: Tied up rope is no joke, spears in our face, get us out of this place! Ain’t really what I anticipated, probably means Justin’s eliminated! Yeah, he’s out.
Justin: Out. Ooooh yeah, yeah- wait hey!
“I wonder if our song made them like us?” DJ questioned. “Hey, Zing-Zings, did you like that?”
They raised their spears back up at Team Failure. DJ fainted again.
Team Cody set down camp for the night around a campfire. “We are waking up at 6 AM sharp to beat Team Chris.” Courtney announced.
“Take a chill pill, Courtney.” Gwen said.
“Yeah. I’d think you’d want to walk to the finish line hand in hand with your boyfriend Duncan.” Heather mocked and laughed.
“I do, actually!” Courtney insisted. “It’s just I care about my team more!”
“You don’t have to pretend you don’t like him.” Gwen chuckled.
“Yeah, if I had a boyfriend here, I’d be rubbing it in both of your faces!” Heather stated.
“You do have a boyfriend here. We see the faces you make at ALEJANDRO.” Gwen laughed.
“Alejandro? Are you kidding me? I do not-I would never-I can’t-he is the most-I don’t even know who he is!” Heather stammered. Gwen and Courtney laughed hysterically.
“Al and Heather sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” Gwen and Courtney mocked.
“I have a boyfriend here too!” Sierra exclaimed. “His name is Cody-wody and he is beautiful and I love him and he’s the cutest person ever!”
Sierra inched closer to Cody. “It’s just you and me Cody….you and me together...forever…” Sierra licked Cody’s face.
“Okay, okay, I’m done! Stop crawling next to me at night, stop taking my things and most of all, STOP TALKING TO ME!” Cody screamed. Sierra’s jaw dropped.
Cody (CONF): Okay, so maybe that was a liiiiiittle bit harsh.
Team Cody sat in silence until something green doused their fire. They looked around at each other and then turned behind them and saw giant green caterpillars.
“Well, this is just great.” Gwen said, as a caterpillar lunged.
Team Chris had also settled down for the night, all sleeping peacefully, except for one.
Alejandro (CONF): Noah is trying to be the proactive and approachable leader of the team and get me eliminated. And while I applaud his effort. It simply isn’t going to work.
Alejandro grabbed a banana from a tree, and placed it gingerly inside Noah’s sleeping bag. Monkeys began to swarm and attack Team Chris.
The next morning, all of Team Chris woke up with bumps and bruises all over. “Man, what was with those monkeys last night?” Trent asked.
“I know, dude. Gave me total bedhead! Luckily I never take off my hat.” Geoff smiled.
“Noah, what’s that by your sleeping bag?” Alejandro questioned. The team looked down and saw a banana.
“That must be what attracted all the monkeys!” Tyler gasped.
“Smuggling food, dude? Not cool.” Duncan rolled his eyes.
Noah (CONF): Oh...he’s good.
Team Failure was still tied to a tree. DJ was writing in a notebook. “To my fish, I leave all of the fish food. To my dog, I leave all of the dog food. To my rabbit, I leave--”
“We’ve been tied here for a day and you’re writing your WILL?” Leshawna questioned with an eyebrow raised. DJ shrugged.
The Zing-Zings said something referring to Team Failure, then laughed heartily.
“Hey, that’s not cool yo! You can’t call us that!” Ezekiel argued.
“Call us what?” Justin questioned.
“You can understand them?” Bridgette asked incredulously.
“Yeah, eh! I speak like sixteen languages.” Ezekiel spoke with pride.
“Why didn’t you say this earlier?” Justin asked.
“I don’t care! We’re not gonna die!” DJ began crying tears of joy.
“Ezekiel, I could kiss you right now!” Bridgette esclaimed. Leshawna stared at her.
Bridgette (CONF): I’m not flirting! I’m just a nice person!
The Zing-Zings said something else, and Zeke translated. “Apparently, they like you, eh.” he said, gesturing to Eva.
“You can have her! We don’t need her!” Justin exclaimed. Eva glared at the pretty boy.
“They want to perform their ‘queening ceremony’ on Eva!” Ezekiel told the rest of his team.
“Tell them they can, IF they let us go free.” Eva announced
“Okay!” Ezekiel translated to them. The Zing-Zings stared at each other, untied Team Failure and ran off crying.
“Maybe they didn’t want the queening ceremony.” Ezekiel shrugged.
Team Chris arrived at the steps of Macchu Picchu. “Alright boys, it’s time to win this thing!” Tyler announced. “EXTREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEME!” . The camera cut to Tyler slowly staggering up the last few stairs and faceplanting. “I didn’t realize there were so many steps.” he sighed. The rest of Team Chris finished trudging up the steps. “Congratulations Team Me, you’re first place and will be riding first class!” Chris announced. The team cheered.
Alejandro (CONF): So Noah will not be leaving this week...well, there’s always next. And after the banana incident, it may be sooner than later.
Chris and Team Chris sat in the boiling hot sun. “Can the rest of them hurry up, or can we go in the plane?” Duncan questioned.
“No...we have to wait out here...it’s for….the drama….” Chris muttered.
“AAAAHHHHH!” Heather screamed, running towards the steps. The rest of Team Cody followed, still being followed by the caterpillars. Team Failure followed from the other side.
“So the two paths lead to the exact same place?” Trent asked, in disbelief.
“Yeah, basically.” Chris shrugged.
The two teams ran as one group as they raced to the top. A caterpillar picked up DJ and threw him into the rest of Team Cody and Team Failure, sending them all careening over the finish line.
“I want my mommy!” DJ cried.
The contestants all stood together at Macchu Picchu. “Wow...today’s challenge featured cowardice, meltdowns, kidnapping, and near-death experiences….can you say AWESOME!” Chris chuckled. “But, no matter how awesome, there still has to be a loser. And in the spirit of ties, BOTH Team Cody and Team Failure are going to elimination tonight!”
“What?” Heather scoffed.
“Come ON!” Eva yelled.
“Yep. Have fun!” Chris snickered as he walked back into the plane.
Heather sat with Courtney. “Okay, Cody SO needs to go.” Heather said. Courtney nodded.
Courtney (CONF): I’ve wanted Cody out since he decided HE was the leader. Well look who’s leading now!
“Just please...PLEASE vote out Sierra!” Cody pleaded.
“I’ll think about it. I just don’t know what to do.” Gwen sighed.
Cody (CONF): Gwen is my only hope. Both Heather and Courtney hate me! I need her right now….and I need SIERRA gone!
“Okay, I say we put an end to this Harold and Leshawna thing once and for all.” Eva said to Justin, DJ, Ezekiel, and Bridgette.
“I’m voting for Harold. I haven’t been able to stand that dork since day 1.” Justin scoffed. Ezekiel and Bridgette nodded.
“I don’t care who goes! The less relationship drama, the better.” Eva said gruffly.
Eva (CONF): Everything in this game is about everyone’s relationships with each other. I thought I was on Total Drama, not the bachelor!
Team Cody and Team Failure sat in the elimination ceremony. “Wow. Team Cody, this is like your nineteenth time here. Haven’t seen Team Failure here in a while, but I guess they had to start living up to their name at some point. It’s time to vote!”
Courtney (CONF): I’m the leader. *stamps passport*
Bridgette (CONF): *tentatively stamps passport*
Sierra (CONF): WHAT IS LOVE? *stamps passport*
“Alright, I’ll do Cody first. Barfbags for Gwen, Heather, and Courtney!” Chris announced, throwing bags to all three girls. “Cody, Sierra, this beautiful relationship is about to end. The final barfbag goes to…
...no one, it was a tie!” Chris announced. “Two votes Cody, two votes Sierra, one vote Gwen...for some reason.”
“You VOTED FOR ME?” Sierra cried at Cody. Cody looked sheepish.
“We’ll get back to you two later. It’s Team Failure time!” Chris got the barfbags ready. “And they go to DJ, Ezekiel, Bridgette, Eva, and Justin!”
All five contestants caught theirs. “And THIS relationship comes to an end as well. Will it be Harold or Leshawna? The final barfbag goes to….
...no one! We have a tie, AGAIN. 3 votes Harold, 3 votes Leshawna, 1 vote Justin.” Chris facepalmed.
“You VOTED FOR ME?” Harold cried at Leshawna. Leshawna looked sheepish.
“All this drama! And since we have two ties, yours truly will get the ultimate say in who goes home! So, after much deliberation…” Chris turned around for a minute and then turned back around “...that was the deliberation, by the way. Anyway, the person taking the drop of shame is……
….Ezekiel!” Chris announced.
“What?” Everyone said..
“What the foshizzle?” Ezekiel questioned
“You may have voted them out, but we’re not getting sued because of them!” Chris announced angrily. “Zeke’s rude comments to the actors playing the Zing-Zings--”
“They were ACTORS?” Leshawna asked.
“Yeah, duh. I’m not allowed to have you guys get actually kidnapped on live TV. Don’t you think I would’ve done it by now if I could?” Chris rolled his eyes. “Anyway, ZEKE here’s comments to them has gotten us a lawsuit for racial insensitivity. And as a strong believer in karma, I think it’s only fair Zeke be tonight’s drop-ee!”
“This is rigged, eh!” Ezekiel cried while putting on his parachute. “I ain’t going down without a fight, eh!”
“Yeah, we figured.” Chris sighed. “Chef!”
Chef appeared and grabbed Ezekiel. “You can’t send me out like this! I’m not done yet! I’ll be back! Bridgette, call meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!” Ezekiel cried.
Ezekiel grabbed onto the back of the plane. “I ain’t going nowhere, yo! I’m in it to win it!” he called, to no one in particular.
Chris closed the door of the plane. “Wow. Glad he’s gone. Forever. Definitely. Never coming back. Will the relationship drama get fixed?” Sierra and Harold cried as Cody and Leshawna stared on uncomfortably. “And who will get dropped next? Find out next time on Total...Drama...World Tooooooour!”
Chapter Nine- Can't Help Falling in Louvre
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, our contestants had a real rumble in the jungle! Alejandro framed Noah for for food stealing, Cody FINALLY told Sierra how he really felt, and Team Failure got a taste of the local culture thanks to Justin’s direction skills! When Team Cody and Team Failure BOTH managed to fail spectacularly, they both went to elimination, where the two feuding lovebirds were on the block. However, thanks to his, um, colorful vocabulary, Ezekiel was the one who took the drop of shame! Man, am I glad that guy’s gone. And with ALL the game’s drama sticking around, it’s sure to be a dramatic week under the stars for our contestants! Will push come to shove in the city of love? Find out, right here, right now, on Total...Drama...World Tour!”
Team Chris sat in first class once again. “Dude, this is awesome!” Geoff cheered. “Are we ever gonna lose?”
“Hopefully not.” Trent said, reclining while getting a manicure. “This is the good life!
Trent (CONF): We’ve won three challenges in a row! After the trainwreck that was the Killer Grips, it’s nice to be on a winning team and have a clearer head about everything and not be crazy anymore. Wait, is this episode 9? YES!
“Yes, despite some struggles during the challenge, due to certain people, we still won!” Alejandro smiled, and then smirked while looking at Noah.
Noah (CONF): Fakejandro set me up last challenge to make it look like I was smuggling food. This puts my get him voted out plan behind a little, but it can still happen! And I think my teammates are smart enough to not fall for his tricks.
“Did you know Noah has voted for you every time and secretly despises you?” Alejandro asked Tyler. He gasped and shook his head.
Alejandro (CONF): It’s just too easy sometimes.
In economy class, Harold was sitting alone on the bench pouting. DJ walked over to him.
“Hey, buddy. Are you doing alright?” he asked, empathetically.
“Am I doing alright? We’re here again, we lost a teammate, and my one true love voted me off? How do you think I’m doing? GOSH!” Harold shouted, and then began to sob lightly.
Harold (CONF): My life is a never ending streak of MISERY! Leshawna voted me out last night and now I have every symptom of depression! *cries* Thanks Psychologist Steve’s Mental Health Camp! *cries*
Eva and Justin sat next to Leshawna, whose head rested in Bridgette’s lap.
Leshawna sighed. “Does everyone hate me?” she asked Bridgette, sadly.
“No! I mean, Harold does, and I don’t think Eva and Justin ever liked you. But other than that!” Bridgette smiled and Leshawna groaned more.
Leshawna (CONF): Don’t get me wrong- Harold annoys the mess out of me. But I feel horrible for voting him out, especially because now I feel like everyone’s turned on me! It’s like the Gaffers all over again!
“So where’s your head at, strategy-wise?” Justin said in a hushed tone to Eva. “Personally, I think we should get rid of Harold. He’s weaker than Leshawna, and splitting the lovebirds up will help our team in the long run.”
“I don’t strategize. I win challenges.” Eva said as she intensely stared at Justin.
Justin (Cockpit CONF): Right now, I’m in an awesome position. I hate half of my team and am targetting them, BUT my closest ally Eva refuses to strategize with me! *smiles*
“You lucky you pretty.” Chef rolled his eyes.
“Thank you!” Justin grinned.
On the Team Cody side of Economy Class, Sierra was sobbing into a pillow. “Hey, how are you doing?” Gwen asked, putting a hand on her back.
“TERRIBLE!” Sierra screamed and then began sobbing loudly again. Heather and Courtney groaned.
Heather (CONF): I have been dealing with this ever since the elimination. She was SLEEP sobbing last night. Ether Cody needs to fix this problem, or he OR Sierra is GOING.
Heather cornered Cody. “Listen, you little twerp.”
“Good morning to you too.” Cody said.
“I cannot deal with anymore of her sobbing. You need to get her happy again, or we’ll get you OFF THE PLANE.” Heather threatened.
Cody (CONF): Okay, can you REALLY blame me for voting off Sierra? She’s totally nuts! But, I do feel bad that she’s crying...and now if I don’t get her to like me again, I’M going home! I can’t go early again! Studies show that the number of chicks you get post-show is directly related to the number of episodes you last!
The PA came on. “Oh, beautiful contestants! We’re gonna be having a little bit of a water landing today, so you might wanna fasten your seatbelts!” Chris announced.
“What does he mean by water--” Bridgette began, but was interrupted with the plane colliding head on with the water in front of the Louvre, splashing every pedestrian in the general area.
The contestants stood outside of the plane. “Say Bonjour everyone, to France!” Chris grinned.
Gwen (Cockpit CONF): Paris! I’ve always wanted to come here, chill out, and see all of the amazing art!
Chef stared at her
“I can have positive feelings towards things, you know!” Gwen fired back.
“Now, welcome to Paris, and more specifically The Louvre! Now, I’m sure you can guess based on where we are what today’s challenge will be!” Chris said.
“Mimes are french, right? Are we miming? Dude, I could rock this!” Geoff cheered, and subsequently pantomimed being in an invisible box.
Noah (CONF): Maybe if we’re lucky, he’ll stay there.
“No, we are not...miming. I worry about you kids sometimes.’ Chris said, and then laughed. “I totally don’t. Anyway, for today’s challenge you will be making masterpieces!”
Courtney (CONF): An art challenge is so up my alley! I was the BEST CIT at arts and crafts. It was macaroni art, but it’s basically the same skillset.
“Here are the masterpieces you have to make!” Chris announced and then showed the cast pictures of famous statues.
“Um, I’m pretty sure someone’s already done these.” Trent said.
“Yeah, we don’t exactly trust you guys to make anything how do you say…..good. So instead we gave you some blueprints! All you have to do is assemble your team’s statue first! But the parts of these statues are hidden…”
The contestants were now standing with Chris inside the museum. “..the Louvre! The first two teams to make their statues correctly are safe at elimination tonight. As for the last place team, one of you gets a one way ticket to Dropsville, courtesy of me!” Chris laughed. “Ready? Go!” he blew an airhorn and all the teams grouped together.
“Okay, does anyone have a problem with me leading this time?” Heather asked. All of Team Cody began to talk over each other in disagreement.
“Okay, guess everyone’s fine with it!” Heather smiled. “Okay, does anyone have anyone have any special searching skills?”
“I’m searching for the pieces of my heart...after Cody SHATTERED it!” Sierra yelled and began sobbing. Heather glared at Cody, who gulped.
Team Failure was huddled together. “Okay, let’s split up gang.” Justin said.
“Why are we doing THAT?” Leshawna questioned.
“So we can find the pieces easier! Duh.” Justin said, with a smug grin. Leshawna rolled her eyes. “The teams will be….me, Eva, DJ, Bridgette on 1 and Harold and Leshawna on the other. Bye!” Justin grabbed the three he called and began running.
Justin (CONF): Leaving them alone together is an easy way to create even more tension, allowing me to get one of them voted off. *smiles* And no one suspects me at all!
Leshawna (CONF): I’m gonna punch pretty boy in the face!
“We should all like, stick together dudes. Getting split is a surefire way to get in trouble, ya kno?” Geoff said.
“I agree, companionship is key. We’ll find the pieces faster if we can all work together.” Alejandro nodded.
“Yeah!” Tyler cheered.
Tyler (CONF): I’m all about teamwork. Like when my coach put me on varsity for basketball, I was the only one who went to every practice! Never played in a game, but I didn’t care cause it was about the TEAM!
Team Cody searched for statue pieces. “Got one!” Gwen said, pulling out a head from under a trash can.
“Me too!” Courtney cheered, grabbing an arm that was hanging above a painting.
“Why can’t I find anything?” Heather complained. An arm then fell from the ceiling and hit her in the head.
“Hey….Sierra….” Cody awkwardly approached the purple haired girl as she was looking on the ground. “I just wanted to say that, um….”
“Cody, I’m moving on from our relationship. I suggest you do the same.” Sierra sniffled. “I have to go my own way.”
Cody (CONF): Oh man….she’s so sad that she’s gone SANE!
DJ, Bridgette, Eva, and Justin searched the Louvre. “You know, for Chris, this is a pretty tame challenge.” Bridgette stated.
“You’re right, actually. No wild animals, no crazy stunts. Maybe he’s losing his edge.” Justin chuckled.
Chris sat watching the cameras in the plane. “Losing my EDGE? Oh, I’ll show them! Release the bears!” Chris yelled. Suddenly, bears started running rampant through the Louvre. One grabbed a painting off the wall and swallowed it whole.
“You just HAD to open your mouth, huh?” Eva grumbled as the 4 ran from it.
Leshawna and Harold walked together in silence. “Listen, Harold. I really don’t want us to keep going like this. I think that--”
“Bear!” Harold yelled.
Leshawna looked offended. “I know you’re mad at me, but that does not mean you get to call me--”
“No, actual BEAR!” Harold screamed, as a bear roared at them. Both screamed and began running.
Team Chris was collecting pieces at a steady pace. “We only need a few more pieces, compadres!” Alejandro cheered.
“I bet the other two teams aren’t even CLOSE to us!” Tyler fist pumped.
“Yeah, I don’t think a team where the most masculine member is Cody will ever work out too well.” Duncan chuckled.
Duncan (CONF): After being on the Loser Gaffers with Heather, Leshawna, and Harold, to have a team that’s actually able to WIN something feels awesome! And I’m sure Courtney will be fine on her team. And even if she does get voted off, she is pretty hot when she’s mad…..
“Look, there’s a piece!” Geoff pointed to a piece in a glass casing.
“I think that’s our last one!” Trent said.
“I’LL get it!” Noah strutted out bravely.
Noah (CONF): I have to show this team I’m worth something, because I know Alejandro is poisoning them against me. Thankfully, this is a super easy challenge. What could go wrong?
“This is no probl--” Noah was interrupted by lasers being fired from all directions surrounding Noah and the piece. “Great.”
Harold and Leshawna ran screaming from their bear, running into DJ, Eva, Justin and Bridgette running screaming from their bear. The two pairs collided.
“At least we’re dying somewhere fancy!” Bridgette cried.
DJ stood up and began scratching the fur on the bear’s necks. “It’s okay, buddies. You’re fine. Don’t freak out.” The bears went from angry with beared teeth to smiling and sitting down. “I’ll call you guys Teddy and Winnie!”
“Are you kidding me?” Chris said, exasperated. He then went on walkie-talkie “Re-cage the bears, I repeat, re-cage the bears.”
“Did you guys find any pieces?” Justin asked, holding up the amount their group.
“No. I was too busy being heartbroken.” Harold said dramatically. Eva glared at Leshawna.
Justin (CONF): Getting everyone to turn on Leshawna is almost too easy. I kinda feel bad…*laughs hysterically* No I don’t!
Team Cody all regrouped as well. “It looks like we have almost every piece!” Courtney smiled when they pooled everything they had collected together. “Sierra, Cody, did you get anything.”
Sierra blew into a tissue. “I made my own art….” she held up a napkin with Cody’s face and broken hearts all over it. “The Cody Betrayal Shrine!”
Cody (CONF): Okay, nevermind, she’s still crazy.
“Listen, Sierra, I--” Cody began.
“Really? Now?” Cody complained.
“Nothing like a forlorn love song. Join in too, Team Failure!” Chris smiled.
Sierra: I love Paris in the springtime…..
Harold: J’taime Paris in the fall!
Sierra: It’s the city of love in the summer!
Harold: But now it’s just a bummer, cause Leshawna took my heart and chewed it up and spit it out and then stepped on it and threw it down a sewer and called it names and then laughed!
Sierra: Oui, my friends you must never trust a boy! Oui, my friends they will treat you like a toy! Oui, my friends they will….BREAK YOUR HEART AND CHEW IT UP AND SPIT IT OUT AN1D STEP ON IT AND THROW IT DOWN A SEWER AND CALL IT NAMES AND THEN LAUGH
- scene cuts to Team Chris by the lasers*
Team Chris: Oui, my friend! You are going to make it through!
Noah: Um, non, my friends. That thing just burnt off my shoe!
- cuts back to Team Cody and Failure*
Sierra: Oui, my friends- all I did was love him true!
“Cody, what are you DOING?” Heather asked impatiently.
“I’m TRYING!” Cody cried.
Sierra: Oui, my friends now I’m stuck telling you...if you fall in love with a boy on TV and then AUDITION to get on his show and then AUDITION again and finally get on his show and do nothing but be nice to him and kiss up you will STIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILL!
Team Cody (pointing at Sierra): She ends up in paris!
Team Failure (pointing at Harold): He feels les despaires!
Sierra: And the boy won’t even take you OUTSIDE!
“All she wanted to do was go outside? Do it Cody!” Heather yelled.
“Sierra, do you wanna, um, go outside, on, a, um, date?” Cody gulped.
“Yes. Yes I would.” Sierra sniffled and then walked out.
Noah was still surrounded by lasers while Team Chris stood watching.
“Dude, just make a move!” Geoff said.
“Um, I actually don’t enjoy my flesh burning. But thanks for the advice!” Noah rolled his eyes.
“Who has something I can throw?” Duncan asked, and then quickly took a necklace from Trent.
“Wait, that was from Gwe--” Trent began, before Duncan threw the necklace at a red button on the other side, disabling all the lasers.
Duncan chuckled. “Once you’ve beaten one security system, you’ve beaten them all.”
Trent (CONF): I’ve never liked Duncan, and now that I have to be on a team with him...ugh! If we ever lose, you know who I want to take the drop.
Noah grabbed the piece. “That’s the last one!” he said.
“To our statue base, amigos!” Alejandro called, and his team ran after him.
“That’s our last piece!” Courtney said, grabbing it out of a trash can.
“Awesome!” Gwen cheered.
“Just think- we couldn’t have done this without my leadership skills!” Heather cheered. Gwen and Courtney both laughed.
Courtney (CONF): Coming into this season, I thought I’d HATE Gwen for being a miserable goth girl who flirts with other people’s boyfriends, but she’s actually pretty cool!
“Great, now we’re behind!” Justin complained. “And I think we all know who’s fault it is….”
“No we’re not.” Eva said, carrying all of the rest of the statue pieces in her arms. “While you were singing, I was working.”
Eva (CONF): I’ve been working on my temper. I’m only allowing myself one angry blow up per challenge. I could’ve gone off on them for that, but I want to save this one for something special!
Cody and Sierra sat outside, awkwardly. “So...uh...you like jazz?” Cody asked. Sierra glared at him.
Inside, Team Cody, Failure, and Chris were all rushing to get to their statue bases, all carrying their pieces.
“Alright guys, we’re in it to win i--” Tyler began, but he tripped and fell, knocking over his team and knocking them into the other teams, creating a giant collision right in front of the statue bases.
Tyler (CONF): I think I’m starting to remember why I was benched all season.
Trent stood up “Um, guys I think we have a problem.” he said, scratching his head at the giant pile of pieces, with no one knowing which ones belonged to which team.
“Perfect.” Noah stared at the camera.
Cody and Sierra continued to sit outside. “Non-alcoholic champagne!” Chef set a bottle down on their table and then walked away.
“Do you want some?” Cody asked, a desperate attempt to be polite
“All I want to know is why?” Sierra said. “Why did you do it? Do you secretly hate me?”
“Well, it’s not really a secret-I mean,” Cody cleared his throat, attempting to explain. “You know, you just...come on a little strong sometimes. And you were just coming on to me so fast, and I’m normally the one that has to make the first move for a girl, and you make me feel awkward because I can see so hard you’re trying and….oh my god, you’re the female me.” Cody’s eyes widened in realization.
Sierra broke out into a smile. “Aww, you were just confused about your feelings! Every good relationship goes through that!” Sierra grinned and then hugged Cody closely to her chest.
Sierra (CONF): He loves me! He loves me! He had to figure out some things about his self-image but he loves me!
Cody (CONF): I would just like to apologize to ANY GIRL I have made feel the way Sierra makes me feel...Jessica Weinberg, that time I hid in your locker….Sarah Smith, that time I switched my whole schedule around to have PE with you…
“Can you give us our pieces?” Heather asked the other two teams.
“I don’t know if you’re aware, princess, but we’re all kinda in the same boat here.” Duncan said. Courtney chuckled.
“You’re not allowed to side with him, I’m your teammate!” Heather yelled.
“Yeah, and he’s my boyfriend!” Courtney fired back. “I think I know which one I’d rather side with.”
“I would never give you sass, muchacha.” Alejandro smiled.
“Oh, get bent.” Heather rolled her eyes.
Noah searched through the pieces for Team Chris’s. “This is impossible.” he groaned.
“Dude, don’t work harder, work smarter!” Geoff said, and grabbed a bunch of random pieces, placing them on Team Chris’s statue base. “Let’s just build it with these!”
Geoff (CONF): Sometimes, combining things is the way to go! I remember one time I had to study for like 5 different finals, so I did it all at once! Instead of just failing one, I got 70s on all of them! My history open-ended on algebra was wicked good!
“I think this is a leg?” Gwen said, holding up a piece of the statue.
“That’s a torso!” Heather said, and then stuck it on their statue that looked nothing like an actual human being.
“Geoff, can you hand me an arm?” Alejandro asked. “Geoff?” he asked again. He then turned to see Geoff and Bridgette making out on the museum floor.
Alejandro (CONF): Now can you see why I wanted Bridgette out all the way back in the Yukon?
Team Failure attempted to assemble their statue. “This looks pretty good.” DJ smiled. Team Failure had an arm sticking out of their torso, which was upside down with two legs sticking out of the side all balancing on a head.
“Hey, Harold, do YOU have any idea on how to fix this?” Justin asked.
Harold sniffled and turned away from his team.
“Ugh, I feel bad.” Leshawna sighed to Eva, whose eye was twitching.
“STOP ACTING LIKE SIX YEAR OLDS, MAN UP AND DISCUSS YOUR PROBLEMS BEFORE WE LOSE AND VOTE ONE OF YOU OUT!” Eva hollered.
Eva (CONF): See, patience IS a virtue!
“I don’t have anything to say to Lebrutus.” Harold turned his nose up.
“Fine. I’m done! Do you wanna know why I voted you off?” Leshawna angrily stomped up to Harold. “Because I couldn’t vote for MYSELF! Do you not think I felt stupid after going crazy over some latin boy no one knows anything about?” Alejandro looked mildly insulted. “Do you think I felt fine that my whole team thought I was dumb, and I messed up my relationship with one of the only people who cared about me? I wasn’t dealing with all that mess anymore. THAT’S why I voted you out.” Leshawna sighed.
Harold began bawling. “I LOVE YOU!” he cried.
Leshawna smiled. “I’m so sorry.” she pleaded “Gimme some sugar, baby,” The two then began kissing passionately.
Harold pulled away from Leshawna. “Oh, and the solution to this puzzle is really easy.” Harold stated. He grabbed pieces from Team Cody and Chris’s piles and quickly rearranged them to make the full statue. “Done!”
Harold (CONF): I’m really good at puzzles. It’s a nice way to pass time when you’re stuffed in a locker.
“That’s correct!” Chris announced. “TEAM FAILURE WINS FIRST CLASS!” Team Failure cheered, except for Justin.
Justin (CONF): Really? I have one goal, to make them hated and get one of them voted out, and one saves our butt in the challenge and the other gives a beautiful emotional speech! *sighs* At least I still look hot!
Gwen, Heather, and Courtney were almost done with their statue, as Team Chris scrambled.
“Geoff, why are you putting the feet on top?” Alejandro questioned desperately as they ran out of time.
“I thought maybe the guy was upside down?” Geoff suggested.
Alejandro (CONF): Being on a team with easily manipulated idiots is fun, until you need to rely on them and realize they’re easily manipulated idiots.
“Gwen, let me get on your back to put the head on top!” Courtney ordered. Gwen obeyed and kneeled down.
Cody and Sierra ran in just as Courtney was about to place the piece. “We love each other again!” Sierra yelled as she hugged Cody. “Let’s pop the non-alcoholic champagne!” she cried, opening the bottle and sending the cork straight into Team Cody’s statue, which it brought completely crashing down.
Sierra (CONF): Oops….
Alejandro placed the finishing piece on Team Chris’s statue. “Finished!” he cried.
“That’s a second place finish for Team Chris! Nice work!” The team cheered. “Oh, Team Cody. What a sad story. For the fourth time in a row, I’ll see you at elimination tonight, where one of you will be spending a lot of time in France!”
Team Failure sat in first class. “Man, does this feel good!” Leshawna said, getting a pedicure, and sitting next to Harold.
“It’s so nice to see you guys back together.” DJ smiled.
“Yeah. It is kinda funny that the exact same thing happened to you two that happened to me and Geoff.” Bridgette said.
“Yeah, that is weird.” Leshawna said, sounding confused. “And the common factor was…”
“Alejandro.” Both Bridgette and Leshawna said, and then looked at each other with shocked expressions.
Leshawna (CONF): Maybe Mr. Latin Lover isn’t as perfect as we all THINK he is…
Gwen, Heather, and Courtney sat in economy class. “Okay, so Sierra ruined the challenge for us. She’s going, right?” Courtney questioned.
“Well, the whole situation wouldn’t have happened if Cody didn’t vote her off.” Heather countered. “God, who betrays people like that?” Gwen and Courtney glared at her.
“We have good reasons to vote either of them off. It’s basically a toss up.” Gwen said. “Kind of an annoying decision to make.”
“1-2-3 not it!” Courtney and Heather both said at once. Gwen glared at both of them.
Team Cody sat at elimination. “Wow, you guys just truly and honestly suck, huh?” Chris chuckled. Heather flipped him off. “The votes have been tallied. Barfbags for….Gwen, Heather, and Courtney!” Chris threw bags to three girls.
“And now, our bottom two. Cody, you proved yourself to be quite the little heartbreaker! And Sierra, I know you were mad and everything, but destroying the team’s statue was a little harsh.” Chris laughed.
“It was an accident!” Sierra cried.
“And the person taking the drop of shame tonight is….
...Cody!” Chris threw a barfbag to Sierra.
“WHAT?” Sierra said. “I was so sure I was going home!”
“Yeah, she lost us the challenge!” Cody said.
“Typical man, blaming it on the girl.” Courtney rolled her eyes.
“We relate to Sierra’s struggle more than yours.” Heather said.
“Sorry, Cody.” Gwen sighed.
Cody sighed. “Well, I guess being on a team with four girls was too good to be true.” he said as he put on his parachute.
“Wait!” Sierra cried. “Cody doesn’t deserve to go home! I will take his pla--”
Before she could finish, Chris shoved Cody out of the plane. “Oops, too late, looks like you have to stay here!” Chris smiled.
Sierra sniffled, and then began full on sobbing again. Gwen, Heather, and Courtney groaned.
“Well, that was certainly a challenge. What loving relationship will be broken up next? Find out next time on Total...Drama...World Tour!” Chris announced.
Chapter Ten- Newf Kids On The Rock
“Last time on Total Drama World Tour, we paid a visit to the city of love! But it was all about lost love for two couples! Crazy stalker Sierra got seriously peeved at Cody for voting her off, and weird nerd Harold got even MORE peeved at Leshawna for voting him off! In the end, both made up. Maybe it’s just that loving french atmosphere? But what wasn’t so loving was the BOOT Cody got directly after.” Chris chuckled “So long, geek! Now, 16 are left, and we’re headed to the shore this week! Who will row, row, row their boat all their way to their demise? Find out, right here, right now, on Total Drama World Tour!”
Team Chris sat in first class again. “Man, these wins just keep on coming!” Geoff cheered.
“I know right? This team rules!” Tyler cheered. “And we definitely couldn’t have done it without our leader, Alejandro!”
“Oh, compadres. It’s not just me! It’s all of us!” Alejandro smiled.
Alejandro (CONF): It is entirely just me. The rest of my team are complete and total incompetentes...but they’re useful incompetentes and I’ll use them until I don’t need them anymore.
“Yeah….for once, this show doesn’t suck that much.” Duncan commented.
Duncan (CONF): Right now, things with Courtney ae good, my team keeps winning, most of them are actually pretty cool….I think I’m actually having a good time on Total Drama! Now there’s a sentence I never thought I’d say.
A flight attendant came by to Trent with chocolates, and held the tray up to him. “Well don’t mind if I-” Trent began,before Duncan grabbed the chocolate and ate it.
“Eh, I’ve had better.” he said, crumpling up the wrapper and putting it on Trent’s lap.
Trent (CONF); Okay, I pretty much like my team...except for Duncan. God, I just can’t stand that guy! He’s so arrogant, and he totally stole Gwen from m--
Trent (pulling on confessional camera): I want that tape back Gimme the tape!
In economy class, Leshawna and Harold exited the confessional together and the rest of Team Failure stared at them.
“And WHAT were you two doing in there for so long?” DJ chuckled.
“Nothing at all!” Leshawna defended.
“Your definition of nothing must be different than mine then, because I definitely heard some noises.” Bridgette said as her, DJ, Harold and Leshawna all laughed.
Bridgette turned to Eva and Justin. “Isn’t it nice for everyone to just be cool with each other again?” she smiled. Justin groaned.
Justin (CONF); I HATE what’s happening right now. All of my targets have become best friends with each other! Why aren’t they all bending to MY will! When did being a hot guy become so hard?
Team Cody awkwardly shifted in their seats as Sierra sobbed dramatically. “MY CODY-WODY KINS!” she cried.
“It’ll be...okay...Sierra..” Courtney awkwardly pat Sierra on the back, seemingly disgusted to have to deal with her.
Courtney (CONF): Sierra had been crying since she found out Cody vote dher out, so you think the rational solution to that would be vote Cody out, right? Well now she’s even madder! God, I hate it when people have “complex feelings” over things.
“All this over Cody?” Gwen questioned.
“I know.” Courtney whispered. “She really needs to get over it.”
“I don’t know, I feel sorta bad.” Heather said, and then walked over to Sierra. Gwen and Courtney looked at each other skeptically
Heather (CONF): Sierra is a broken person right now, and if I’ve learned anything after 3 seasons of this show it’s that the weak and worthless make GREAT alliance members. I need to get her on my side, but in a subtle way.”
“Hey Sisi! Girl, friend, pal, amigo, bfffl- what’s going on?” Heather smiled.
Sierra sobbed into her hands “Everything is horrible!” she cried
“Okay, I know you liked Cody.” Heather began.
“HE WAS MY REASON FOR LIVING!” Sierra cried
“Yeah, sure, but you have to think. If you just give up now, you’re letting the evil ones who voted him out win.” Heather said.
“Didn’t you vote him out?” Sierra asked.
“Unimportant. The point is, the team needs you.” Heather smiled.
Heather (CONF): Our team is down to 4 people, and Gwen and Courtney have randomly become all buddy-buddy, if it goes down o 3, I’m out. I need to make an alliance with Sierra. I just don’t understand why she’s still upset about Cody. I mean, it’s been like eight hours. Who cares about something for that long?
“Contestants, we will be landing shortly!” Chris announced over the PA. The plane smoothly landed.
“Wow, that was the calmest we’ve ever gotten somewhere.” Gwen smiled. She then opened the door of the plane. “Aaaand we’re in the middle of the ocean” she sighed.
The scene changed to Chris and Chef standing on a nicely designed boat, while the three teams all sat in their own canoes.
“Welcome to my home, Newfoundland!” Chris announced. “I have so many good memories from back here...hanging out with my friends on the rocks, getting voted prom king of my high school, being captain of the football team, being captain of the soccer team, being captain of the basketball team, being captain of th--”
“I think we get it.” Heather rolled her eyes.
“ANYWAYS, this week’s challenge will test your skills on how you can fit in with my culture.” Leshawna rolled her eyes as Chris smiled. “And the founding experience in any Newfie’s childhood is their fishing trips!”
Geoff (CONF): Aw man, I love fishing trips! Just getting to chill out, catch some fish, catch some rays, and drink some-- wait, what’s this show rated again?
“Um..are you sure we can catch anything with these?” Justin questioned staring at the rods.
“It’s not about the strength of the rods, it’s about the strength of the person using them.” Chris smiled.
“What does that MEAN?” Heather asked exasperatedly.
“You might wanna stop whining and start paddling, considering you have no idea how far mainland is and the sun goes down preeeetty early here.” Chris laughed as the contestants looked around nervously. “Have fun!” he smiled as he sped away on his boat.
“We need people to paddle, and people to fish.” Eva stated gruffly. “Here.” she threw a fishing rod at Bridgette.
“I can’t fish! I’m a vegetarian!” Bridgette cried.
“Fish isn’t meat. Get over it.” Eva glared at her. Bridgette sighed.
Bridgette (CONF): Is it sad that this show has worn me down so much that I can’t even fight about compromising my morals anymore?
“And you two are rowing.” Eva threw paddles at Harold and Leshawna.
“Um, who died and made you queen of anything, but Leshawna is NOT rowing.” Leshawna complained, stepping towards Eva.
“I made MYSELF leader, because I’m the strongest one here, and if you have a problem, we can sort it OUT.” Eva said through gritted teeth. The two girls dramatically glared at each other.
“Oh sister, DO NOT PLAY WITH ME!” Leshawna yelled as she began to run even closer to eva before being held back.
“I can row!” DJ yelled as he cowered. “Just please don’t yell at each other…”
Leshawna (CONF): If that girl thinks she can boss me around, you got another thing coming! She’s lucky DJ came in, before she went overboard!
DJ (CONF): I don’t like conflict between anyone, but Leshawna and Eva? That’s world war 3 waiting to happen!
“Oh rowing boys!” Duncan called and threw paddles at Noah and Tyler.
“Um, why exactly are we the ones rowing?” Noah asked.
“Because you’re the most useless.” Duncan shrugged. “Now get to it.” He poked Noah with the s
Duncan (CONF): I don’t pick on nerds because I enjoy it, it’s just necessary. Some people need to get their butt kicked sometimes, you know? And Noah is DEFINITELY one of those people.
“I will do the REAL man job of fishing.” Duncan said, sitting at the back of the boat with the rod.
Noah sighed. “Well, this blows.”
“What? This is like the best job ever!” Tyler cheered. “Rowing’s awesome!”
Tyler (CONF): Cause of my super cool finger strength, I’m awesome at rowing! Doesn’t apply to the rest of my arms, though...sometimes my hands just keep going even when my arms completely dead, then it goes numb for a while...that’s normal, right?
“I mean, there’s no way I’M rowing. I was basically born to be our navigator!” Courtney said walking to the front of the boat.
“Sierra, why don’t you fish? It’ll take your mind off things.” Heather smiled.
“There are lots of fish in the sea...but only one’s named CODY!” Sierra cried loudly.
Heather (CONF): She’s getting crazier! I didn’t even think that was possible!
“Alright, now that everyone’s settled…” Chris began.
The contestants groaned.
“Hey Sierra, maybe a song is just what you need to get your head back in the game!” Heather smiled.
“A song...wait, if I don’t sing....” Sierra began to smile.
“Wait. Wait!” Heather yelled helplessly as the beat came in.
Alejandro: We’re headed down to Newfoundland, that rocky eastern shore…
Geoff: I’ll have the shrimp, mussels, cod and the lobster commodore.
Bridgette: : I can’t get a thing to bite so we better get there first!”
Eva: Row harder, faster both of you! For the wind, work up a thirst. STROKE STROKE STROKE!
Heather: It’s a sea shanty, and it’s DARN catchy! Come on Sierra, your turn!
Tyler: Duncan, you’re a psycho, but you sure can catch a fish!
Duncan: Thanks there Ty, you’re quite kind, to my skills at killing fish.
“Pretty goods at nerds too!” Duncan laughed as he gave Noah a noogie.
Harold and DJ: Trying our best Eva, our arms are getting tired.
Gwen: (pointing to a shortcut sign) Courtney, do you see!
Courtney: Could it be? Steer hard starboard side!
Everyone: It’s a sea shanty, and it’s DARN catchy!
Sierra: No, you can’t catch me, with a sea shanty!
“YES!” Heather cheered.
“No….” Sierra groaned.
“You’re still in the game, you’re still in the game! HA!” Heather laughed.
Sierra (CONF): I can’t believe I was so weak-willed...but in my defense, the sea shanty WAS catchy…
“Are you sure about this ‘shortcut’, Courtney?” Heather asked. “It seems a little sketchy to me.” An eel dramatically zipped by the boat as dark clouds emerged.
“Don’t worry, when it comes to navigation, I’m right 95.63 percent of the time!” Courtney said.
Courtney (CONF): Of course I calculate every single one of my decisions to see how right the choices I made are each day! Who DOESN’T?
“Actually Courtney, i might agree...this is pretty shady.” Gwen said as the boat began to rock.
“Welcome...to your nightmares!” a disembodied deep voice bellowed as Gwen, Heather, and Courtney screamed. The girls cowered as they sailed into darkness, and then a little ghost puppet popped out.
“Really?” Gwen rolled her eyes.
Gwen (Cockpit CONF): I mean, Chris really needs to get his danger budget up. Is that supposed to pass for scary now?
“Courtney, this is pretty shady!” Chef mocked in a high-pitched voice.
Gwen glared at the camera. “You know, the toilet might actually be the better option!”
After the “ghost” went away, the sky cleared and the island was in sight.
“Awesome!” Gwen cheered.
“Yes! We are so winning this challenge!” Courtney cheered.
“Hey Sierra, have you caught any fish yet? I know it’s a hard time and we understand if you couldn’--”
“Actually, I’ve caught a bunch.” Sierra said solemnly as the camera panned to a bag full of fish, with Heather looking shocked.
“Sierra, that’s amazing!” Courtney smiled.
“Yeah, and I think I’m starting to feel better!” Sierra weakly smiled.
Heather (CONF): Okay, I THOUGHT I wanted Sierra’s head in the game, but I really just want to win, and if she’s efficient while being normal for once, AND easy to control, maybe it’s best for all of us if she just stayed depressed!
“Don’t forget, Sierra. Your one true love was just eliminated.” Heather said.
“You’re right. I’m worthless!” Sierra cried. Courtney and Gwen glared at Heather, who whistled innocently.
Justin groaned on Team Failure’s boat. “What’s TAKING so long…” Justin complained.
“Maybe if you were ROWING, you would know. “ Harold grumbled.
“Pretty people don’t have to do physical labor. That’s the ugly people’s job.” Justin said while filing his nails.
Justin (CONF): These are all strictly glamour muscles. I work out to maintain them, but I’d never actually USE them for something. *shudders* What am I, a construction worker?
“It’s so unfair that Justin doesn’t have to do any owing, I mean GOSH!” Harold scoffed.
“Yeah….whatever, as long as we win, that’s what matters.” DJ smiled, attempting to be positive.
DJ (CONF): I consider myself a positive guy, and I really want my team to all get along. It’s just that they’re all um...what’s the word...crazy.
“But my mad navigating skills are being WASTED right now.” Harold complained.
Harold (CONF): I got great at navigation from going to Mapping Steve’s Navigating Camp. The first thing we had to do was find the camp from the middle of the woods with no map. It was the best education I’ve ever gotten.
“I could’ve fished, too! I mean, look at Bridgette.” Harold complained
Bridgette placed a worm on the hook as bait. She then began to tear up.
“What’s wrong, Bridge?” Leshawna asked.
“That worm had a whole life ahead of it! It probably had some sort of worm family that loved it.” Bridgette placed her head in her hands. “I don’t know if I can do this.”
“Girl...It’s a WORM. It wasn’t gonna do anything but crawl around in some dirt and eventually get eaten by some bird.” Leshawna siad.
Bridgette (CONF): Leshawna’s right...I mean it IS just a worm….but aren’t WE just HUMANS?
Team Chris was currently in last place, rowing slowly. Duncan brought up another fish. “Got a new one!” Duncan announced and threw it on deck. “How many does that make?”
Geoff looked through the pile of fish. “Twenty five!” he cheered “There’s no way we lose this challenge!”
“Well, we have to make it to shore, which won’t happen if we keep going this slow. What’s wrong, chicken arms?” Duncan questioned, punching Noah in the arm.
“I’m rowing as fast as I can.” Noah complained
“Really?” Trent said incredulously.
“That’s a little pathetic, man.” Geoff added. Noah looked down in shame.
Noah (CONF): I’m getting a little sick of everyone looking down on me. I mean, I bring a very important contribution to this team! Like...uh...
Team Failure, looking exhausted, saw the mainland and immediately perked up. “YES! We’re in first!” Eva cheered.
“Really?” DJ questioned.
“How?” Leshawna added on.
“Because SOMEONE actually got you losers to bust your butt and WORK! That someone is me, by the way.” Eva smirked.
Leshawna (CONF): Oooooo, I cannot STAND the way that Eva girl thinks she runs this team. The next time she sasses me, she’s getting a paddle where the sun don’t shine!
“And if Bridgette caught a solid amount of fish, we’ll have even more of a head start!” Justin said, and then smiled deviously. “You DID catch some fish, right Bridgette?”
Bridgette awkwardly chuckled. “Um, yeah...about that…”
Justin held up the empty bucket. “Wow, no fish caught? I mean, what a way to let your team down…”
“I mean, how many fish did you expect a vegetarian to catch?” DJ said with a raised eyebrow.
“Girl did say she didn’t want to do it.” Leshawna added.
Justin (CONF): Why do they all like each other so much? What kind of friends “understand others’ shortcomings”? I just don’t get it!
Chris sat inside the small pub the second part of the challenge took place in, staring out the window dramatically. “Round my hometown….memories are fresh. Round my hometown… oh the people I’ve met. Shows that we ain’t gonna stand sh--”
“Um, Chris?” Bridgette said.
“Gah! How long have you guys been here?” Chris asked.
“Long enough to hear that.” Leshawna chuckled.
Chris glared. “ANYWAY, the final part of the challenge is the traditional Newfoundland relay!”
“Just a relay race? That doesn’t sound that bad.” Justin said.
“Well, let’s get straight to the relay then! Part one: Chug this bottle of apple vinegar!” Chris smiled and slammed a whole bottle of vinegar on the table. Team Failure stared at each other.
Team Cody and Team Chris both rushed in immediately. “Wow, how convenient t! Almost like some guy wanted to end this episode quickly for some reason. No idea why that would happen. Not like we’ve been off the air for 6 months or something.”
“Can you just get to whatever horrible thing you’re making us do now?” Heather asked.
“Chug vinegar.” Chris said.
Gwen (CONF): Hey, at least he’s finding new ways to make us miserable.
“We’re LOSING OUR LEAD! SOMEONE VOLUNTEER!” Eva yelled.
“Why don’t you volunteer, Miss Unibrow?” Leshawna questioned angrily.
“Because I’m saving myself for a STRENGTH challenge- something you might have if you lost a few pounds!” Eva yelled back.
“Oh, you’re gonna get it!” Leshawna yelled as she lunged at Eva, but DJ stood up in the middle of them.
“I’ll chug the vinegar!” DJ announced. Leshawna and Eva growled at each other over his arm.
Gwen and Courtney stared at Heather. “What?” She questioned. “I hope you don’t think I’M doing it.”
“Well, neither am I!” Courtney said.
“Just make Sierra do it! It’s not like she can get any lower.” Heather commented as Sierra beat her head on the floor.
“I think she’s gone through enough.” Gwen sighed. “Whatever, I’ll do it.”
Gwen (CONF): I have to admit, I feel bad for Sierra. Even though she and Cody’s thing was….weird, I know how it feels to lose a love on this show. I mean when me and Duncan broke u--Trent! I meant Trent!
Gwen (pulling on confessional camera): I want that tape back! Gimme the tape!
“So who’s doing this?” Duncan said, sharing at the jug of vinegar.
“No problem, dude!” Geoff said, as he sat down and chugged the vinegar down in one shot.
Team Chris all cheered. “Dude, that was awesome!” Tyler said.
Geoff (CONF): I’ve definitely chugged some way wore things!
“Team Chris takes the lead!” Chris announced. “The next part of the challenge is translating a traditional Newfoundland phrase from my cousin, Jed!”
Noah (CONF): Translating! Something to do with the BRAIN! I can definitely show my worth here!
Noah walked forward and sat down on the bench cockily, “I got this one, guys.” he boasted
“Confident. Jed, let’s hear the phrase!” Chris chuckled.
“Oh me nerves ye get me drove.” Jed stated.
Noah sighed deeply. “This should be fun.”
“You can do it, smart dude!” Geoff cheered.
“If you don’t, we’re definitely voting you off!” Duncan cheered, then snickered. Trent glared.
Trent (CONF): I really don’t like Duncan. Sure, Noah isn’t good at...most things, but to attack him about it everywhere he goes...that’s low.
“Um, it’s saying like...you drive on my nerves? Or something?” Noah muttered.
“That sounds right!” Tyler smiled and gave a thumbs-up, while Alejandro facepalmed.
“No dudes! You drive on my nerves...that means you drive me crazy!” Geoff said. Jed smiled and let them go the next part of the relay.
Noah (CONF): Did I just get outsmarted by GEOFF? I might as well just quit, at this point.
Gwen finished chugging vinegar, and slammed the jug down. “Good job, Gwen!” Courtney cheered. Gwen smiled back at her.
Courtney (CONF): Just looking at it critically, Gwen is the most sane person left on our team, and therefore the best ally. Plus, I’ve actually started to like her personality. Maybe we could actually be...friends?
DJ slammed the vinegar down. “We’re BEHIND!” Eva yelled. “Let’s GO!”
“We can all hear you.” Leshawna rolled her eyes as she and Bridgette sat across from Jed.
“So what’s the last part of the challenge?” Alejandro asked.
“Glad you asked, my Spanish friend! All you have to do is kiss this fish!” Chris handed a dead fish to Team Chris who all stared, disgusted.
Alejandro (CONF): I have done many things for my team, but french kissing a fish is off the line. Besides, this mouth is reserved for la chicas…
Jed said the phrase to Leshawna and Bridgette. “I...have no idea.” Bridgette said, sheepishly.
“Wow, yet another failure in the challenge by Bridgette. Seems like she’s one of our least useful members, huh.” Justin said to DJ and Harold.
“Everyone has bad days, I guess!” DJ smiled.
Justin (CONF): Why don’t they HATE each other! God, I wish I could go back to being surrounded by models. Those people KNOW how to have a petty feud.
Alejandro continued to stare in the fish’s open mouth. “Come on, Al!” Tyler cheered.
“I’m sure you’ve done this to tons of chicks!” Duncan added.
Noah chuckled “Guess he’s not so perfect.” he muttered to Trent. Alejandro glared and then passionately kissed the fish.
“I can do ANYTHING.” Alejandro said confidently while walking past Noah.
“Team Chris wins! Team Chris wiiiiins!” Chris cheered. Team Cody and Team Failure both groaned.
Noah (CONF) Okay... maybe he Is that perfect.
Alejandro (CONF): Did I want to kiss that fish...not particularly. But it’s never a bad idea to pass up the win for your team, and any opportunity to show Noah how pathetic he is is one that I can’t pass up!
Jed repeated the phrase, but Leshawna and Bridgette still looked puzzled.
“Come on ladies, let the EXPERT do it.” Harold said, pushing Bridgette and Leshawna out of the way.
“PLEASE explain to me how you’re an expert on Newfoundland slang?” Leshawna raised her eyebrow.
“Because of my mad linguistic skills, duh?” Harold said, sitting down and cracking his knuckles. “Lay it on me.”
Jed repeated the phrase and Harold stared blankly. He then pulled out a giant dictionary. “Time to find some etymologies!” Team Failure groaned.
Leshawna (CONF): I like Harold, but sometimes that boy gets on my last nerve. I just hope he isn’t getting on anyone else’s- I need a TEAM to take Eva down!
Heather sat down, and Jed said the phrase to her. “You’re getting on my nerves.” she repeated back, almost instantly.
“How did she do that so fast?” Courtney questioned.
Heather (CONF): Obviously I know how to insult people in several native tongues. Wanna hear me say “I hate you” in Arabic?
“The only thing we have left to do is kiss the fish!” Gwen said excitedly.
“Courtney, you’re up!” Heather smiled, pushing her in front.
“Um, I have a BOYFRIEND!” Courtney cried.
“It’s a FISH. I’m sure your criminal boyfriend won’t care!” Heather rolled her eyes.
“He is NOT a criminal- he is a juvenile delinquent!” Courtney argued. The two continued bickering.
“Sierra, if you don’t do something they’re gonna win. Wouldn’t Cody want you to continue on?” Gwen said. Sierra suddenly looked determined.
She ran to the fish “THIS IS FOR YOU, CODY!” Sierra bellowed, she then passionately made out with it.
“Something is seriously wrong with that girl.” Leshawna sighed.
“Team Cody snatches second place!” Chris announced. “Wow, what a surprise! As for you, Team Failure...someone’s saying bye bye tonight!”
Leshawna, Bridgette, DJ, and Harold stood in the cargo hold. “Do we have to strategize in here?” Bridgette asked, as a rat crawled on her head.
“Sorry, but it’s the only spot on this plane where you can get ANY privacy.” Leshawna complained. “Anyway, I think we all know what needs to happen tonight.”
“Yup- it’s time for Justin to finally go!” Harold smiled.
“Justin? No, we need EVA out of here. She’s the real evil one!” Leshawna cried.
“I COMPLETELY agree. She’s a nightmare.” Bridgette complained.
Bridgette (CONF): Back on the island, Eva tried to KILL me for something I didn’t even say! I thought she would have calmed down by now, but clearly THAT was wishful thinking...I just can’t wait to have her out of here!
“But Justin’s the real jerk. He’s threatening my spot for alpha male of the team!” Harold complained.
“DJ has more masculinity then you and prissy boy in his pinky toe, and he cries at animal shelter commercials.” Leshawna rolled her eyes.
DJ’s voice wavered “I just want someone to adopt them…”
“I’m voting Justin and that’s final!” Harold stated.
“Fine, you can be difficult. As long as the three of us vote for Eva, it doesn’t matter.” Leshawna said, as they all got out of the cargo hold. However, Eva entered right before DJ could leave.
“Hey Eva…” DJ said, sounding unsure.
“Cut the CRAP.” Eva said gruffly. “You’re voting Harold off tonight, get it? And you know what will happen if you don’t?” Eva grabbed a barf bag full of peanuts and crushed it in her hand, and then walked out. DJ gulped.
Justin (CONF): I know there’s no way I’m going home. They’d have to be crazy to vote this face off.
Harold (Cockpit CONF): I know I should vote Eva off but….it would be so satisfying to see Justin get kicked off. Then I’D be the hottest guy on this show.
Chef laughed uncontrollably. “What? What?” Harold asked angrily.
Team Failure sat in the elimination ceremony. “Wow, an embarrassing performance from you guys. And it seems like a lack of team chemistry may be the cause of that.” Chris said as Eva and Leshawna growled at each other.
Chris chuckled. “Tension-y. Time to vote!”
Leshawna (CONF): *stamps passport angrily*
Justin (CONF): *smirks while stamping passport*
DJ (CONF): *looks conflicted between passports*
“The votes are in.” Chris announced. “And the barf bags go to…DJ and Leshawna!” Both of them happily received their bags.
“Bridgette and Justin!” Chris announced, throwing both bags. Justin winked at Bridgette, who glared back.
“And now, our bottom two. Harold and Eva. The brute and the geek. Harold lost the team the challenge, while Eva’s just generally unpleasant. The final barfbag goes to……….
...Eva!” Chris announced.
“WHAT!” Leshawna gasped.
“While I do appreciate a good blindside, I wish it wasn’t on me.” Harold sighed.
“Harold, this wasn’t supposed to happen!” Leshawna said. “I don’t know WHAT did happen, actually.”
DJ whistles innocently.
“But I’ll miss you, you crazy white boy.” Harold went into kis her, but she just hugged him.
“And now that you’ve done your typical mushy couple stuff…” Chris shoved Harold out of the plane. “See you later, bro! That’s another loser down, with some more to go! How did this shocking elimination happen? Will Team Cody finally self-implode? And will Eva and Leshawna finally get into a no-holds barred fistfight?” Chris whispered to the camera. “My money’s on yes. Find out all of this on the next Total...Drama...World Tour!”