Total Drama Interviews: The Producers

Written by: BlastWave

Note: This interview is supposed to be a connector and shall answer some questions fans like you and me may have about the series. These may or may not be show accurate. I dedicate this fanfiction to Mrs. Persch and Mr. McGillis, the creators of the show and I hope you enjoy it.


Cynthia Fox: Hello folks! I’m Cynthia Fox and today on this program I’m interviewing two of the producers of the hit TV show “Total Drama Island,” and its sequel, “Total Drama Action.”

Producer 1: Thank you.

Producer 2: It’s quite a pleasure to be here Ms. Fox.

C.F.: Of course. Now for the first question. Can you tell me your names?

P.1 & 2: NO!

C.F: Why not?

P.1: We are sworn to secrecy.

P.2: If the contestants find out who we are, or even the host finds out, they’ll come after us. And it may not be good for our health.

C.F: Is that why your voices sound weird and you are silhouetted?

P.1: Well, my voice is a disguised Liverpoolish accent.

P.2: And this is my real voice. I was a heavy smoker and have to talk through this metal voice thingy.

C.F: Really?

P.2: No, I’m just kidding.

C.F: Okay… Moving on. All of the contestants think that you’re evil, cruel, diabolical people. Is that true?

P.1: (laughs) Yes. It’s true.

P.2: We’re very cruel people.

C.F: Why? Don’t you two have hearts?

P.1: Of course we have hearts!

P.2: We’re just forced to be cruel. Chris said that cruelty sells these days.

C.F: Oh. You mean you actually work for him?

P.1: Yes, of course.

P.2: We are working for him, but we also help with the funding, hire workers (who we still have to pay), and set up the challenges.

C.F: Wow. You do all that?

P.1: Of course, madam.

C.F: Well can you tell us a little bit about yourselves?

P.1: Well, my comrade [P.2] and I are good friends.

P.2: We’ve been together since fourth grade I think?

C.F: When did you start working for Chris?

P.1: Well, we were in a band with two other guys doing music a nightclub in the Galleria Mall, and we were also the band for the boy band DawgToy for a while. When things got bad, the band split for a while, and we were out of a job.

P.2: He found us, and hired us to be his producers for five years. He originally wanted to share the money 50/50, but as time went on, and he became more famous, he reduced our share to three percent.

C.F: Do you still play music?

P.1: We were the house band for the “Total Drama Action” Aftershow. But, we try to sneak out occasionally with our band mates sometimes. Remember the time we played on the roof of the Galleria Mall?

P.2: Yeah, and then Chris showed up, and he was very cranky.

C.F: Guys! Try to stay on topic. How did the Total Drama Series start?

P.1: We had been working for Chris for a while, with his duties hosting that figure skating show.

P.2: And I produced that movie about badminton and zombies.

P.1 Anyway, Chris came to us with this idea for a new TV show called “Camp TV,” which was kind of like the show “Real World.”

P.2: He ordered us to fetch the idea to TV studios and almost all rejected it, except one.

C.F: You mean Teletoon?

P.1: Exactly. They were the only TV network that accepted us.

P.2: But they did want us to make a few changes to the show, like making it an elimination show. And they told Chris’ agent some other things they didn’t tell us.

P.1: For example, they told his agent that they don’t like a sweaty look for him.

P.2: After a while the show changed so much, we had to change the name, in order to keep up with how totally dramatic the show would be.

P.1: Hence the name “Total Drama Island.”

C.F: Interesting. How did you find Camp Wawanakwa?

P.1: When I was a kid, I went to Camp Wawanakwa. I explored everywhere when I had the time. Everywhere and everything you see, it is real.

C.F: But what about that burger joint?

P.1: What burger joint?

C.F: In the one hour episode, Courtney found a fast food restaurant.

P.1: I didn’t know that was there. And how could that be?! We were on an island in the middle of nowhere and there was a f***ing burger joint right there?!!

P.2: Don’t freak out. It’s a little odd, I know, but that burger joint is not actually on the island. It was just a trick the boss and I pulled.

P.1: (chuckles embarrassingly) Anyway, I had a fun time there, and saw all the sights. Including the Isle of Bones.

C.F: You mean Boney Island?

P.1: Yes, I learned of the curse of the island when I took a skeleton from there. Years passed and after a series of events in which I was injured throughout the years, I talked to a Wawanakwa native and learned of the curse. Afterwards I returned it to the island after trying to flush it down the toilet, burying it in a litter box then throwing it in the dumpster.

C.F: All right. Thanks for that (shudders) bit of information. Did you do the auditioning?

P.1: Unfortunately yes. We toured over the country (in disguise of course) promoting this new show, and even saw some of the contestants.

P.2: For example, we saw D.J. pushing shopping carts outside a grocery store.

P.1: We originally wanted to tell them the truth about where the show wanted to take, but Chris edited it to make it look like a fabulous mansion where the show would take place.

P.2: After that, auditions poured in. We had to select fourteen, but there were so many good ones. So the boss man [Chris] had to extend the number to twenty-two. Then we sent the letters to those lucky contestants, 21 because the audition for Katie and Sadie was on the same bill, so we sent one of them a letter, calling them to be contestants.

C.F: Okay. I’m sorry to cut this off, but I have another question. Where did you find the Chef?

P.1: We found him outside a bus station near London (Ontario that is) selling pieces of street meat in order to promote his restaurant. We told him about the show and he accepted, because I think he wanted the pleasure of being famous. We showed him to Chris, and they became partners. And through the struggles they faced, they became firm friends.

C.F: How do you come up with the challenges?

P.2: Well, whatever we think is tortuous for the contestants we showcase to the boss, and if he accepts, it goes.

C.F: Do the other producers like working for Chris?

P.1: Unfortunately, yes.

P.2: They were just ecstatic about torturing the contestants.

C.F: Were you aware of what would happen with the one million dollar challenge?

P.1: Actually, we didn’t warrant that challenge. We were at the movie studio where season two was to be held when we heard about the challenge and the case being eaten by a shark. The boss told us and we said we had to have a tie breaker. So we did, and the fourteen who were closest to winning the million had to compete again.

C.F: You talked about the studio where season two is held. Can you tell us a little more about the place?

P.2: The studio used to be the old North Park studio, which closed in 1997 because of the lot not being up to code. It’s a shame. I liked some of the films they made.

P.1: Like the “Rodents Who Kill” series?

P.2: Of course. And the “Trampoline Thunder” films. We can’t forget those.

P.1: Well anyway, we bought the place using what three percent of the funding we have, and everything in it. The costumes, props, sets and other things, like the mechanical monster which you see in a few episodes of the show.

C.F: Another question people have been asking is where did you get the animals for the show?

P.1: We bought the bear and the shark in Seattle, Washington, a big city on the west coast of America. We altered them to do some odd things, like you see the sharks living in freshwater and breathing on land. We experimented with that just before making the “TDI” promo. The Sasquatchanawkwa was a native of the Lake Wawanakwa area for centuries. We caught and trained it to do all sorts of stuff like reading, speech (it’s very limited), and how to dress itself.

P.2: The raccoons which you see in both seasons are everywhere. We caught one and used it for the animal-buddy movie challenge. I think Beth got along really well with the critter.

C.F: You mentioned you get three percent of the funding. Who gets the other 97%?

P.1: Well, with all the funding from our sponsors like the Khaki Barn clothing chain the Penalty Box sports stores, and the Ridgemount hotel chain, along with the funding the government gives us, most of the money goes to Chris for his doings.

F.F: How did you feel about the lawsuit Courtney did to get back onto the show?

P.1: We did try to convince Chris during the first season to let Courtney return, because of the unfair elimination, but he said that he didn’t care and it was to stay the same. Then we survived our first lawsuit before the one-hour episode, but the other one was a disaster for us.

P.2: We felt a little upset about us losing a lawsuit. Our appeasement had to be very firm, with all the things that Type “A” dirtbag wanted us to do, like have her use her PDA and all the things she wanted, like a gourmet dinner so that way she wouldn’t eat Chef’s s***ty food.

C.F: And what about the interns? You said you haven’t paid them yet.

P.1: Well, that’s true. Those guys work so hard, they deserve some pay, but every time we try to pay them, the boss takes the money and spends it on a fancy suit or some other crap like that.

C.F: Speaking of Chris, how do you feel of working for him?

P.1: Actually…

P.2: In hindsight…

P.1 & P.2: We hate it!!

C.F: Why? I thought that working for one of the most popular shows in the country would be fun.

P.1: It’s actually torture for us.

F.F: Why?

P.2: Well, the boss doesn’t care about the safety of the contestants; he is sadistic, rude, conceited, etc.

C.F: Have you ever tried to break free of his grip?

P.1: We did when we considered the “Total Drama Action Aftermath” show. Chris objected, but the network let us go through with it, even though Chris said putting amateurs in charge of a TV show was a waste of time.

C.F: Tell me more.

P.2: Well, after Geoff and Bridgette got eliminated, they were upset at being the first to go, so we gave them their own show. We limited their control, but Geoff started pushing us for more ideas. We (along with Chris and Geoff, but mostly Chris) thought of things like using a hammer, then an anvil, and finally an electric chair as a means of getting the truth out of people. Thankfully, Bridgette got through to him before it was too late, with a little help.

P.1: Things were smooth sailing after that.

C.F: Did you expect Duncan and Beth to tie for the win in season two?

P.2: No actually we didn’t.

P.1: Fortunately, we had a backup plan for this kind of emergency.

C.F: And what was that?

P.1: When the last episode was ready for taping, we wanted to give the winner a hero’s welcome and a chance to something good for ourselves.

P.2: We, along with Geoff and Bridgette and everybody else, wanted to get back at Chris for what he did to everyone over the course of the seasons by showing people humiliating pictures. We heard he was heading to Sunset Beach after he finished hosting, so we thought it was the perfect opportunity to humiliate him behind his back.

P.1: In case of an emergency return, we told the chauffer before they left for the airport to send them straight to Camp Wawanakwa. After hearing that he was close by, we wanted to seal off all the exits from the studio, but somehow he got in, took over and turned T.D.A Aftermath: IV into the Total Drama Finale episode of Total Drama Action.

C.F: What about Geoff and Bridgette?

P.1: They told us about what happened, and helped us try to stop this, but there was nothing we could do, so they just made out, but came back in time to see Duncan win.

C.F: Was Chris mad at you?

P.1: Oh yes. He was so upset at letting those “amateurs” humiliate him he cut off one percent of the show’s funding so we only get two and he gets 98%.

P.2: And he’s making us work for as long as the show still is on television.

C.F: And how long will that be?

P.1: As long as Chris adds on seasons to keep our “bloodthirsty” fans coming.

C.F: I heard from Celebrity Manhunt that you were making a third season. What have you to say about it?

P.1: We thought of it as some kind of thing like the Beatles’ Magical Mystery Tour, but there will be challenges based on places the contestants will travel to.

C.F: Did you help come up with the false season?

P.2: Well, not exactly. The other producers thought it would be a joke, but we didn’t.

P.1: So, we were fired on the night of the Gemmie Awards, and replaced by two new producers. They looked exactly like us, only with different hairstyles and clothing, and they were nasty.

P.2: So, we traveled with the contestants, but incognito of course in an attempt to get to the abandoned studio to talk about the show throughout Canada.

P.1: We were forced off the road though, but through a series of events far too elaborate to talk about right now, we made it just as Chris and the contestants who stayed behind when the bus crashed, along with Sierra and Alejandro, were celebrating being in season three.

P.1: Chris then rehired us, because he wanted us onboard again for another go-around.

P.2: And he gave us a promotion.

C.F: What’s that?

P.2: Well, during this season, when prompted to by Chris, the contestants will break into spontaneous singing. They will sing about what is on their minds at that very moment.

C.F: What does that have to do with you?

P.1 and P.2: We get to play the music!

P.1: We and our band mates will play the music that you will hear, along with an added orchestra later on.

C.F: Well thanks for the interview, guys.

P.1: It is a pleasure, madam.

P.2: Yes, a true pleasure, Ms. Fox.

C.F: That’s all for now folks. And be sure to catch the new season of the “Total Drama” Series, which is called… What’s the new season called?

P.1: We wanted to call it Total Drama the Musical, but it’s now called Total Drama World Tour.

C.F Don’t miss “Total Drama World Tour,” coming soon to your local TV station in whatever country you live in.

P.1 & P.2: See ya!

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