There may be some content not for younger kids. However, there is nothing here they wouldn't say on the Total Drama series.
Total Drama Antarctica is the sequel to Total Drama: Paradise Beach, and the second story in SG's main canon. Chris McLean takes sixteen teens to the frozen continent of Antarctica, where they are forced to withstand freezing temperatures, brutal weather, and each other. The sole compeititor to avoid elimination and outlast their fifteen opponents walks away with a million dollars. This is Total Drama Antarctica!
Chapter 1- The Land Down Under, Way Down Under
Chris was seen sitting down at a elegant-looking dinner table upon a gigantic stage by himself. He was sipping tea from a porcelain cup, sitting on a red chair. He turned to the camera. "Oh." He sighed in a seductive voice. "Hey there. You're watching the newest season of Total Drama. On our last season, eighteen teens took to luxurious Paradise Beach to compete for a cash prize of one million dollars. The contestants recieved fine food and costly accomedations... as long as they won that challenge, and were surrounded by beautiful scenery and a sparking ocean. Paradise Beach really lived up to its name. So, who wouldn't want to live like that? We got millions of audition from kids, eager to hang out where our last contestants did. Sixteen of them were selected to compete." A strong, noisy wind began to blow. Chris raised his voice in order to be heard over it. "But we may have stretched the truth about our location this time around!" The winds blew a few of the floorboards out of place. "That's right!" Chris stepped away from the table just before it blew away with the wind and floorboards. "We're not going to be at Paradise Beach this season!" He put on a winter coat that was lying on the floor. He jumped off the stage as it was torn apart by the ferocious wind and carried away. "Welcome to the coldest place on Earth!"
The camera zoomed out to show the icy, barren landscape and snow surrounding Chris.
"Stay tuned right here!" Chris called. "This is Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chris was later seen walking across the frigid continent, sporting his winter coat. "Sixteen contestants are coming here in hopes of staying in the lap of luxury, kissing each other and... whatever else teenagers do. They've been traveling by air for hours, expecting to make up for the jet lag by staying in that beach house we rented for last season. Ha! Keep dreaming." Chris took out a pair of binoculars and stared into the sky. "I think I see the plane coming... it's getting closer... and closer." Chris put down the binoculars and his eyes widened. "Run!" He sprinted away from the plane.
The plane landed with a heavy thud on the ice. The door swung down, making a walkway from the airplane to the ground.
"And here comes our first compeititor." Chris announced.
A tall, slender boy with a purple shirt stepped off the plane. "Oh my gosh!" He squealed. "I get to stay at the exact same place my heroes did..." He looked around, as if just realizing his location. "...We're not competing at Paradise Beach this season?"
Chris smirked and shook his head.
"Oh. I was kind of hoping to pry around the beach house, hoping to find something a contestant left behind..." The boy stammered. "...With any luck, I could've found something like Janina's diary..." He pointed to his shirt. "As you can tell, I'm a huge Janina fan. I'm wearing the same color as her for luck!" He pointed to his pants. "I'm also a huge fan of Redd. As well as Lana, Aquamara, N..."
Chris rolled his eyes. "Your name being?" He interrupted.
"...Ronald. President of the TD:PB fan club." He introduced. "I'm also a certified..."
An overweight girl with auburn hair jumped from the plane and crushed Ronald.
Ronald moaned in pain.
The girl got up and blushed. "Sorry there, partner." She apoligized in a thick country accent.
"It's okay..." Ronald wheezed.
The girl looked away, still blushing. "My name's Jennette." She went up to Chris. "Pleased to meet ya, big-shot." She looked around. "I thought we would be at that there fancy beach they showed on the old TV set."
Chris shook his head. "Disappointed?"
Jennette chuckled. "Disappointed? I've survived sixteen winters back home, with all the crops freezin' over and we havin' no food for days. This'll be a piece of cabbage."
A black-haired girl wearing all green stepped off the plane. "...Um, hello?" She stammered, obviously clueless on how to behave in the presence of others. "How are you d-doing?"
Chris snickered. "Disappointed that we're in Antarctica instead of a beautiful beach?"
The girl's eyes widened. She dropped to the ground and hugged it cheerfully. "Beautiful, beautiful land... untouched by the cruel hands of mankind. Still frozen... with an ozone layer above it." She was moved to tears as the temperature began to make her shiver.
Jennette went up to her. "You okay there, partner?"
The girl nodded and sighed deeply. "I'm more than okay..." She assured. "...I'm fantastic."
Jennette stared at her awkwardly. "What's your name, bud?"
"Bunny..." She cooed, still hugging the ground.
A round boy with auburn hair and and a dark shirt peeked his head through the plane door. His eyes widened. "This is supposed to be a beach?" He took out a bright green sockpuppet and put it on his hand. "I told you global warming was bogus, Pepe." He scolded. He made his voice imitate the puppet's and moved its mouth. "Well, excuse me for being concerned for our planet." He stepped onto the ice, tripping over Bunny. He looked over at her. "Beaches freezing over, pretty girls hugging ugly ice, what next?"
Jennette giggled. "You're funny, boy."
The boy got up and shook her hand. "My name's Kortney. Nice to meet you."
Jennette stifled a laugh. "Ain't that a peculiar name for a boy?"
Kortney frowned. "I've heard that joke before. Must be a meme, or something."
A boy with irregularly multicolored hair and multicolored hair to match hopped out of the plane. "Hey, everyone..." He laughed creepily. "How's the donut licking the stop sign?"
The others backed away from him, confusedly.
"Is he, um, unstable?" Kortney worried.
Chris nodded. "Yep. We accepted to him to appeal to the five-year-old demographic."
"How would a creepy short guy appeal to five-year-olds?" Ronald stuttered.
Chris shrugged. "Don't know, don't care."
The boy shrugged. "Zanibanito will eat all your cookies and steal your..." He stepped forward and tripped over Bunny, who was still hugging the ground.
Zanibanito's eyes widened. "Black hair!" He shrieked and ran away. He crashed into the side of the plane and was knocked out.
The contestants and Chris stared in awkward silence for a while before the next contestant arrived.
The next contestant was a thin girl with light brown hair, wearing sky blue. She leisurely walked over to the contestants and let out a noisy yawn. "Hey, there. Nice you all, I guess. I'm Meagan." She walked up to Chris. "When are you going to show us where we sleep? ...And this isn't a beach."
Chris smirked. "Soon enough."
Kortney grinned. "She's kind of hot." He whispered to Ronald. He took out Pepe. "Maybe I shoudl introduce her to Pepe."
Ronald elbowed him. "If she's anything like the ladies from TD:PB, she won't like that."
Meagan sighed deeply and laid down next to Bunny. "Hey, whatever-your-name-is."
A blonde boy wearing pink stepped off the plane. "Whoo!" He cheered. "Y'all ready to party?!"
No one responded.
The boy continued as if he had gotten a positive response. "That's what I like to hear! Woohoo!" He slid down the walkway and across the ice to land at Chris' feet.
"Allan." Chris greeted. "I see you haven't changed much since your audition tape."
Allan nodded. "I'm still the same wild party animal you saw on that tape!" He assured.
"No threat there." Ronald mumbled.
Meagan nodded. "He seems fun, to say the least."
A boy with black hair wearing all green, much like Bunny, arrived.
Kortney poked Bunny. "Isn't that guy all green like you?"
Bunny looked up and realized that the boy's pockets were stuffed with cash, and he had a dollar sign tattoo on his left arm. "Not that kind of green..." She mumbled. "Money is something that seperates us from the beauty in nature and life itself."
The boy scoffed. "You're just jealous of all this." He opened up his pockets, letting numberous bills and coins spill out. He quickly picked them up. "I'm Franklin. Future billionaire. No big deal."
Many of the contestants rolled their eyes.
The next contestant literally dove from the plane in a backflip. She had black hair and was wearing all dark red. She did one more flip and faced the others. "Hiya! I'm Lily."
Several contestants looked at her with awe or freaked-out expressions.
Lily blushed. "Yeah, I know my form was pretty sloppy, but... I just got off a twelve-hour plane ride." She giggled.
Kortney went up to Lily. "That was awesome, dude..." He complimented.
Lily blushed and was nearly knocked down by the next contestant.
A blonde girl in green slid down from the plane and across the ice. "Woot!" She cheered. "This may not be a beach, I couldn't have done that if it was!"
Chris rolled his eyes. "Where are all the negative reactions?"
The girl chuckled. "Silly Chris..." She got up and shook Lily's hand. "My name is Keetin."
Kortney immediately looked at her. "Well, that's a weird name for a girl."
Keetin's smile dropped.
Jennette chuckled. "Said the guy named Kortney!" She called playfully.
Keetin stifled a laugh. "Nice to meet you, Kortney."
A boy with brown hair in red got off the plane. "Where's the flashy, fancy beach house I wanted to see?"
Franklin shook his head. "Typical of a poor person. Always wanted to see the 'awesome fancy stuff.'"
The boy blushed. "I'm not... poor."
A penny dropped out of Franklin's pocket.
The boy dove for the penny and cupped it in his hands. "A penny... I haven't seen one of these for months." He stared at it with wonder.
Many of the contestants stared at him with pity.
"Do you have a name?" Meagan sighed.
"Yeah." The boy whispered. "My name is Luc."
"That's an okay name..." Keetin sighed.
Chris stared forward awkwardly. "Next!"
The twelfth contestant was a tall, African-American boy wearing red. He slid down to the ice. "Hello, all." He greeted. "Ladies."
Lily blushed and looked at the boy shyly.
"Think about it." He charmed. "You, me, a nice restaurant, a star-lit night..."
Many of the girls blushed.
The boys mumbled with envy.
"It's just too bad..." The boy sighed. "Some of us will not be here long." He glared at Luc.
Luc looked down with despair.
"Rufus!" Chris called. "Same as always."
Rufus nodded and scoffed. "You betcha."
A thin girl with auburn hair scurried out of the plane slyly. She walked silently past the others, not uttering a word. Her face gave away no intention of a relationship, alliance, or anything else.
"I'd you to meet Fiona." Chris introduced. "Better known around her town as Foxface."
Foxface nodded and folded her arms smugly.
Rufus shook his head in shame. "How improper to compare such a fine lady to a wild animal." He winked at her.
Foxface blushed slightly, but turned away afterwards.
Jennette giggled. "Where I come from, that sounds like a compliment! Foxes are mighty hard to catch, just like you, girl!"
Foxface nodded in agreement.
"Shouldn't she be cold?" Luc whispered to Meagan. "She's wearing only a tank top."
Meagan shrugged. "Let her do what she wants."
The next contestant trudged out of the plane. She had shoulder-length brown hair and was wearing gray. "Like, hey, everyone..." She greeted depressedly. She began to play around with her hair. "Like, I'm so totally glad to be here...? And, um, I'd like to thank my, like, parents for sending me here... and stuff."
Meagan frowned. "What's wrong with you?"
The girl sighed. "My, like, boyfriend is, like, totally getting on my, like, nerves. Cause, he, like, totally is, like, dramatic."
Lily recoiled in disgust. "Ew... she smells like a bad young adult romance novel." She expertly flipped away.
Luc shrugged. "I once slept in a box that smelled like that."
Keetin inched away from Luc.
"Cristen." Chris welcomed. "You'll surely help us with the emo chick demographic."
Cristen nodded and sighed. "That is, like, totally..." She got lost in her thoughts and was run over by the next contestant.
The next contestant was an unattractive girl with red hair and large glasses. "Ew... I stepped on a poor person. I don't step on anyone unless they're at least middle class."
Cristen mumbled, "Whatever, I guess..."
Keetin sighed. "Another one of those?" She pointed to Franklin.
Franklin smirked. "A girl with money, eh?"
The girl chuckled superiorly. "Saying I have money is such an understatement. My family has billions. And I would never been seen in public with any of you."
Meagan scoffed. "You're on TV, smart one."
The girl shrugged. "I'll be even richer before the season is through. What does it matter? I might become the world's first trillionaire."
Franklin's eyes turned into dollar signs as he ran over to the girl. "Marry me, whatever-your-name-is."
The girl swatted him away. "My name is Betti Pamplemousse IV. I'm sure you know me from magazines such as Rich Princess Monthly."
Luc shrugged. "I've never ever heard of the magazine."
Betti backed away. "Ew... it's one of those broke people. I bet he doesn't even have a home."
Luc blushed and looked down.
"If you're so rich, wouldn't you have gotten plastic surgery or something to make yourself not ugly by now?" Kortney scoffed.
Many of the contestants burst into laughter.
Betti grumbled, "My mother won't let me get surgery, like all my friends. With their perfect noses and giant boobs..." She pointed to the sky and yelled, "I hate you, Tiffany!" Her phone began to ring. She picked it up. "Oh, hey, Tiffany..."
Chris rolled his eyes. "Right... here's our last contestant. He might be a familiar face."
A short boy with distinct brown hair stepped off the plane. "Hey, ladies!" He called in a freakishly high voice.
All of the contestants reacted to seeing him.
Most of the boys gagged, as did half the girls.
A few of the girls squealed and embraced him.
The boy grinned. "Hey, baby." He said to Jennette. "Baby..." He said to Betti. "Baby..." He said to Keetin. "Oh... this is nice."
"I never thought I'd get to meet you!" Jennette shrieked.
"Never say never, baby..." The boy called.
Even the normally mellow Allan was upset by his inclusion. "Why is Dustine Believer here?"
Rufus threw up. "He can seriously reduce my chances with the ladies... the ones with no music taste."
Chris smirked. "We hired that little boy, I mean, girl, I mean... I think he's at least a kid... to gain ratings... from girls with no music taste."
The boys rolled their eyes.
"Now." Chris sighed. "If you'll follow me, it's time to pick teams and introduce you all to the tents." He led the sixteen teens to two small, pooly built tents.
"So, there are only two teams this season?" Keetin asked.
Chris nodded. "I was just getting to that."
A couple of interns planted flags on the ground. One was purple with a picture of a penguin on it, and the other one was orange with a picture of a seal on it.
"If I call your name, come stand by the purple flag." Chris ordered. "Bunny. Keetin. Lily. Rufus. Zanibanito. Luc. Foxface. Franklin."
The eight contestants called stood near the purple flag.
Bunny examined the illustration of the penguin. "They got the beak all wrong..." She mumbled.
Zanibanito hugged the flag tightly. "Penguin..."
"You guys are Mr. McLean's Penguins!" Chris announced.
The team cheered, except for Franklin.
"...Penguins." Franklin muttered. "Such filthy creatures."
Bunny glared at him and attempted to punch him.
Rufus held her back. "Don't stoop to his level, Bunny..." He struggled.
"The rest of you." Chris continued. "Allan. Betti. Cristen. Dustine. Jennette. Kortney. Meagan. Ronald. Go stand by the orange flag."
The remaining eight took their places by the other flag.
"You guys will be called The Freezing Seals!" Chris announced.
"Ugh, why am I forced to work with these peasants?" Betti grumbled.
Dustine winked at her. "Hang in there, baby."
Hearts formed in Betti's eyes as she hugged Dustine. "Marry me, Dustine..."
Ronald took notes on this. "First relationship..."
Kortney rolled his eyes.
"...Um, where can I lie down?" Meagan asked.
Chris pointed to the tents. The camera zoomed in, showing that they were tall but poorly constructed and could easily be blown away by the wind. Eight sleeping bags were thrown on the ground inside each.
"So, the winners don't get anything extra?" Lily inquired.
Chris shook his head. "Nope. You'll be forced to stay there until you get voted out... or win. The point is, you're not going to stay in anywhere better while you're here."
Meagan yawned. "It's getting late..."
"Yes, yes it is." Chris chuckled. "Your first challenge will be tomorrow. Have a good night's sleep... if you can." Chris snickered sadistically.
The sixteen contestants grumbled but went into the tents.
"...And that's it for the premiere episode!" Chris closed. "Tune in next time to see who will be voted off first right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 2- That One Relay Race Episode
Chris was seen crouching behind a block of ice, stealthily observing some penguins. He faced the camera. "G'day, viewers." He said in a false Australian accent. "Today we take the frozen continent of Antarctica for some penguin watchin'." He took out a pair of binoculars and spied a female penguin. He zoomed in on it intently. "There's a prime example of the gentoo species..." He continued to stare at it interestedly.
A male penguin of the same species snuck up on the television host and promptly slapped him in the face.
Chris groaned and stepped back. "Sheesh..." He sighed, letting go of the accent. "I was just making good TV."
The penguin turned his back to Chris and whistled.
Several other penguins scurried over to aid the other one in attacking Chris for the next five minutes.
Chris laid on the ice, beaten. "Penguins are only cute in the movies..." He shuddered. "L-l-last time on Total Drama Antarctica, our sixteen new contestant arrived: Allan, Betti, Bunny, Cristen, Dustine, Foxface, Franklin, Jennette, Keetin, Kortney, Lily, Luc, Meagan, Ronald, Rufus, and Zanibanito. They were put into two teams: Mr. McLean's Penguins and the Freezing Seals. They were introduced to their... poor accomediations, and are preparing for the first challenge of the season. What will it be? And who will become the first player to take the Plane of Losers out of here? Find out right now on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Bunny was seen observing a penguin. She gently poked its right wing.
The penguin turned around and lept into Bunny's arms.
Bunny grinned and cuddled the penguin.
Franklin was watching her from outside the tent. He scoffed. "That idiot. She stays outside in the freezing weather with hideous animals instead of being inside a tent... a poorly-constructed tent, but still." He rolled his eyes. "Nature. Hideous. If you ask me, it should all be bulldozed and turned into something useful."
Penguins surrounded him after that statement.
The penguins beat him to the ground.
Franklin shrieked helplessly.
The penguins stopped beating him and walked away, content.
Bunny walked by. "Um... what did you do? You don't happen to have any fish on you, do you?"
Franklin shook his head.
Keetin was also on the roof, carefully painting in a notebook.
Foxface jumped, obviously not noticing her before.
Keetin giggled. "Don't mind me. Just painting, like I usually am."
Foxface raised an eyebrow. She looked over at Keetin's notebook.
Keetin was drawing a simple sky. "Curious, are we?"
Foxface shook her head and sighed.
Luc was outside his team tent, plucking at his guitar's strings. He sighed and shook his head. He looked up hopefully when he saw Franklin.
"Oh, another one..." Franklin mumbled. "You do know you can go inside the tent? Which'll probably be the first shelter you've gotten in years..."
Luc beamed. "You're inviting me inside?"
Franklin's eyes widened as he shook his head. "Like I'd let homely filth like you live with me." He smugly adjusted all the money in his pockets. A twenty dollar bill fell out of his pants pocket.
Luc gasped and clutched it in his hands. "A twenty-dollar bill... so these are real."
Franklin scowled and attempted to snatch it back. "Gimme it back, you bum!"
Luc shrieked and ran away with the money and his guitar.
Franklin chased after him, yelling obscenely.
Lily was seen awkwardly stretching on the ice, often slipping. She dropped to the floor and groaned.
Rufus walked over and helped her up.
Lily blushed. "Um, sorry. I'm just not used to this... environment."
Rufus chuckled and nodded. "No problem, you little tulip." He put his arm around Lily.
Lily blushed. "Um, thanks..."
Rufus smirked. "You know, the first challenge is coming up later today. I was wondering... you got no allies in this compeition? I'd like to propose an alliance."
Lily blushed more and turned away. "How can I decline...?"
Rufus snickered. "I knew you'd say yes. Now, why don't we find some ice for your knee?"
Lily nodded. "That shouldn't be too hard." She chuckled.
Rufus laughed, though obviously not finding it humorous. He took hold of Lily's hand and led her away.
Zanibanito was running around aimlessly, being a waste of both the audience's time and the flim crew's time. He picked up a snowball and threw it at Lily's back.
Lily jumped in surprise and was caught by Rufus.
Rufus was surprised, as well. He clutched Lily in his hands and pulled her back up.
"What was that?" Lily sighed.
Rufus looked behind him at Zanibanito and rolled his eyes.
Zanibanito guffawed crazily and ran blindly up to the couple. "How'd you like the spaghetti turban attacking your cheese shorts?"
Rufus rolled his eyes again and shook his head.
Lily shrugged and kneed Zanibanito in the groin.
Zanibanito shrieked and fell to the floor in pain.
Lily and Rufus both laughed trimphantly and walked away.
Betti giggled. "Oh, Dustine... you almost make staying with these penniless idiots bearable." She looked around. "Ew... there's not even a washroom in here. Where do I take a shower? I can't keep this face beautiful without a proper washroom."
Dustine giggled. "Hang in there, baby. Remember: you can get through anything... if you're with me."
Betti nodded loyally. "I love you, Dustine... and your money... oh, all those Benjamins... yeah..."
Dustine sighed. "I would say you'll never like me for me... but I never say never."
Betti was seen in confessional, which was simply a piece of ice outside the tents. "Ugh, I would've rather had that beach house from last season... it may be for the lesser rich people, but at least it's not in the..." She shuddered. "...Wild. Anyway, Dustine is dreamy and all, but the main reason I want him? His money. They guy has tons for his wonderful singing voice." She stared into the camera. "Why am I even talking to lowly viewers like you? Chris better edit this out... or else." She scowled.
Allan was shown just waking up, even though it was midday. "Woot!" He cheered. "Who's ready for the challenge today?"
None of his teammates present said a word.
Allan frowned. "Whoa, let's get pumped. Stop lying around and live life!"
"Said the guy who got up at noon..." Cristen grumbled.
Allan chuckled. "Don't worry, Cristen. It'll all balance out when I go to sleep at two tonight."
Cristen shook her head. "Why must you always be so peppy and upbeat? It makes me sick." She gagged.
Allan rolled his eyes and got out of bed. "Whatever, Cristen."
Cristen sighed. "Like, how can I relax when my, like, boyfriend is like, totally, stressing me out?"
Allan shrugged. "Just don't think about it."
Cristen shook her head. "That is like, so pointless. Why try when the world is just, like, all empty and hopeless?" She began to mess around with her hair.
Allan's smile began to droop. "I'm going to leave before I catch a case of depression." He walked outside the tent.
Cristen nodded. "Yeah, cause, like, it's so, totally..." Her voice trailed off.
Ronald was sitting at the confessional-rock, jotting down notes. "Today is the first challenge of the compeition. With all the data I've gathered from watching and rewatching Total Drama: Paradise Beach, i've gathered that the most useless one on the team will go home first. So, that's either Meagan or Zanibanito. With my knowledge of Total Drama strategies and statistics, I'm sure to make it far." He sat back relaxedly.
Meagan was lying asleep on her bed, comfortable and rested. She woke up reluctantly, despite it was midday. She was taken aback by Ronald, who was standing right next to her, breathing loudly. "Oh... you. What do you want?"
Ronald held up his hand. "Meagan. I'm willing to help you get through this game, as long as you listen to my strategies and theories."
Meagan raised an eyebrow. "Why would I need your help?"
Ronald shook his head. "Duh. You're the laziest and most useless one on the team."
"Hey!" Meagan called. She sat back down. "What gives you the right to talk to me like that?"
"What gives me the right?" Ronald sighed. "I'm your only hope at this point. Without me, you'll go home first time we lose."
Meagan rolled her eyes. "If I'm not a threat, why would I be voted off?"
Ronald shook his head again. "Oh, Meagan... so much to learn."
Meagan held up her fist. "Do I have to give you an attitude adjustment?"
Ronald sprang up and ran for his life.
Megan smirked and chuckled devillishly.
Jennette was staring enviously at Dustine and Betti. She folded her arms and turned to Kortney. "How can he go and fall for a city folk like 'er? Just look at 'er. All fancy-like and rich. She ain't no one ya wanna get hitched with. If ya ask me, I'mma say she ain't in no position to deserve 'im."
Kortney rolled his eyes. "A real question is who would want to date that fifty-year-old pedophile in disguise, urm, teen pop sensation, Dustine Believer?"
Jennette looked at Kortney suspiciously. "What was that, partner?"
Kortney's eyes widened. "Am I the only one who sees the possibility?" He murmured.
Jennette shook her head and shrugged it off. "All I know is I gotta get 'im to fall in love with me. And quick, before that Betti girl does."
Kortney smirked. "How about we have a deal? I'll help you vote her off when we lose, and you help me in the challenges."
Jennette thought it over briefly and nodded. She shook Kortney's hand. "Ya got yourself a deal, partner."
Kortney took out Pepe and whispered in his voice, "How bout you and me ditch the big lug and go on a date, sweetie?" He returned to his normal voice and put Pepe away. "Pepe, do you have to hit on every girl I meet?"
Jennette rolled her eyes playfully and giggled.
The sixteen met Chris outside the tents for the challenge.
"...What is there do to here, even?" Franklin sighed.
Chris ignored him and explained, "Today's challenge is a relay race. Each team will split into four pairs, each pair doing a leg. The first leg will be sledding down a mountain, the second leg will be skiing across the ice, the third leg will be swimming in freezing water, and the last leg will be running over to me and finishing. Any questions?"
Many of the contestants had wide eyes.
"Ya expect us to swim in freezing water?" Jennette trembled. "I'm from the farm. I don't know nothin' about cold."
"Too bad." Chris chuckled. "Let's see... the pairs are Luc and Zanibanito, Keetin and Foxface, Rufus and Franklin, and Lily and Bunny for the Penguins. We have Allan and Meagan, Ronald and Kortney, Cristen and Jennette, and Betti and Dustine for the Seals. Each pair will go in the order named."
The teens got into pairs ans stared at each other awkwardly.
Luc was obviously uncomfortable around Zanibanito. "Um, hi..."
Zanibanito chuckled and began to slap Luc for no apparent reason.
Allan leaned over to Meagan. "Looks like we're up first, babe."
Meagan snorted and backed away.
Chris handed large sleds to Allan and Luc. "Time to start off the race!"
The teens got into position at the peak of the mountain in the distance and got ready to begin.
"Um... you promise to just stay still and let us slide down peacefully?" Luc asked Zanibanito nervously.
Zanibanito shook his head. "There's no such thing as peace when the pumpkins are snapping to the beat of the turtle song!"
Luc stared at him worriedly.
Meagan was lying backwards, wearing sunglasses. "All we have to do slide, party boy. Shouldn't be too hard."
Allan nodded. "This'll be a piece of cake!"
"And... go!" Chris called to them.
Luc pushed on the ice, causing him and his strange partner to go forward rather quickly. He shrieked loudly.
Allan and Meagan took off slower, with Meagan's weight pulling them backwards.
Luc was screaming his head off, going rather quick.
Zanibanito yelled in joy. "Woo! You can't get this kind of mustard where the penguins eat danish plastic bags!"
Luc just stared at him awkwardly and continued to shriek.
Allan was struggling to get ahead. "Um, Meggs..."
Meagan rolled her eyes. "What kind of nickname is 'Meggs?'"
Allan tugged on her shirt, pointing to the other team. "Can you lean forward and help me?!"
Meagan rolled her eyes again and did as told. The sled began to speed past the other team's, getting into the lead.
Allan cheered. "Woo! I haven't had this much fun since Katheryn Hudson threw that party last friday night!"
The Seals eventually reached the bottom, and tagged Ronald and Kortney, who hopped into skis and began to go cross-country.
Luc and Zanibanito reached that point shortly after, and tagged out for Keetin and Foxface.
Ronald and Kortney naturally got an early lead, though strugging to keep their balance on the skis.
Foxface's swift body allowed her to easily balance on the skis, and quickly pulled ahead of the boys.
Keetin, on the other hand, was far behind the others. "Wow... how do people manage to go so fast on these things?!"
Foxface looked back and scowled, widening her lead.
Kortney scoffed. "Of course no one ever wins these things. I hate cross-contry skiing."
Ronald nodded. "If... we... lose... our..." He panted. "Leg... we'll... have... a... chance... to... be... voted... out..."
Kortney rolled his eyes. "You're a genius..." He retorted sarcastically.
Foxface reached the second leg's finish, and waited for Keetin.
Keetin began to sweat nervously as she struggled to catch up, only advancing speed a little.
Kortney and Ronald reached the second leg finish, tagging Cristen and Jennette to let their team advance.
Cristen and Jennette reluctantly leaped into the freezing water.
Keetin struggled again, but eventually made it. "Phew... that was fail." She tagged Rufus and Franklin.
Rufus and Franklin also jumped into the water halfheartedly.
Jennette immediately began to shiver. "Whoa... this water is mighty cold."
Cristen shrugged. "I can bear it. It reminds me of the ice that, like, totally, eats away at our, like, souls."
Jennette glared at her suspiciously. "Right..." She began to swim toward where the fourth leg was.
Cristen groaned and followed.
Rufus scoffed. "So, it's kind of cold. I can handle it." He began to swim.
Franklin trembled. "I can't feel my b-b-brain..." He slowly swam towards the finish, trembling. "S-s-someone of my c-c-class shouldn't have to endure t-t-this..."
Rufus sighed deeply. "Come on, Franklin. We have to catch up."
Jennette was swimming quickly, tearing through the waves, mostly because she was eager to step out.
Cristen was halfheartedly but surely swimming ahead, almost caught up with Jennette. "This is, like, pointless..."
Rufus looked back to see Franklin falling behind. "Franklin! Speed it up!"
Franklin glared at him. "I don't need someone like you giving me orders."
Rufus scowled. "Fine then. How about commands instead? Get your butt over to shore I'll rip you to shreds!"
"That was more of a threat than a command." Franklin grumbled.
Rufus glared back. "Do you want to die?"
Franklin blushed, shook his head, and began to swim quicker.
Jennette began to see the shore. "We're almost there, partner!" She called back to Cristen.
Cristen nodded carelessly.
The two girls finished their leg and tagged Betti and Dustine.
Betti and Dustine began to run towards Chris.
Rufus and Franklin finished shortly after and tagged Lily and Bunny.
Lily blushed and winked at Rufus before beginning to run along with Bunny.
Betti and Dustine got an early advantage, of course.
Betti has running rather awkwardly, attempting to keep her shoes clean. "Ugh! Running is for peasants who can't afford sports cars!"
Dustine looked over at her and winked. "Or teenage pop stars being chased by adoring fans, like you."
Betti blushed. "Oh, Dustine, stop... and give me your money."
Bunny was running quickly, almost catching up to the Freezing Seals' last duo.
Lily was doing flips rather than running, but was going as fast as the others anyway. "We have to win this leg or we'll go to elimination!" She panted.
Betti looked back and snorted. "Like those little hags could beat us. One surrounds herself with nature to make her feel good, the other enjoys..." She shuddered. "Physical movement."
Dustine shook his head. "Let's not get cocky, Betti. Let's love the world... and pray for it to be better."
Betti smirked and fell on the floor, seemingly on purpose. "Oh, no, Dustine! Come and help me!"
Bunny and Lily grinned as they sped right past the spoiled girl.
Dustine stopped in his tracks. He looked over at Chris, and back at Bunny. He repeated this for a while before setting his eyes on Chris. "Meh, she's not worth it. I have millions of fangirls." He ran towards Chris.
Bunny panted. "Are we almost there? My lungs are suffering!"
Lily nodded and continued to run alongside her.
Dustine eventually reached Chris. "The Freezing Seals win!" He cried.
Chris smirked. "...Yeah, that would be true. Too bad you left Betti out there in the freezing cold. She needs to finish too, y'know."
Dustine's eyes widened as he ran back to get Betti. "I'm coming for you, baby!"
He reached Betti shortly.
Betti looked up with false despair. "Dustine... you came back. I thought you never would."
"Never. Say. Never." He whispered and leaned in for a kiss.
Betti closed her eyes and leaned in as well.
"Mr. McLean's Penguins win!" Chris inturrupted.
Betti and Dustine opened their eyes and began to panic.
The rest of their team surrounded them, obviously angry.
"...What the heck was that?" Meagan scoffed.
Betti scoffed. "You all just don't understand true romance."
Jennette and Kortney smirked and winked at Betti.
"Teammates." Jennette began. "My partner, Kortney, here would like to help ya with your vote tonight."
Kortney and Jennette went over to talk to their teammates.
Betti and Dustine looked at each other worriedly.
That night, Chris went over to the Freezing Seals' tent to explain elimination. "Seals. You will be directed to... some random spot in the ice for elimination. After each of you cast your votes, the one with the most will have to take the Plane of Losers all the way home, and be the first one eliminated from the game."
The Seals nodded, some worried, and followed Chris to where the elimination was going to be.
They were later shown at elimination, sitting down on the cold snow.
Chris held up seven snowballs. "If I throw a snowball at you, you're safe. The player with no snow on their clothes will go home... forever. The first three snowballs go to Jennette, Kortney, and Ronald." He threw snowballs at the three.
Jennette trembled surprisedly.
"These next ones go to Allan and Cristen." He threw snowballs at the two.
Allan cheered, while Cristen barely reacted.
"Meagan. You're also safe." Chris declared.
Betti and Dustine hugged each other tightly.
"Betti. Dustine. The last snowball goes to...
...Dustine." The egoistical host finished.
Dustine fell over when Chris threw the snowball at him, moaning, "Sorry, Betti..."
Betti gasped. "How can all you peasants vote me off? I mean, Dustine's just a kid with a good voice! How does he help you?"
Kortney chuckled. "Good voice, she says."
Betti rolled her eyes. "You know what? I don't need this! I have billions of dollars back home! I'm way too good for this compeition!"
Dustine waved good-bye to her sadly.
Betti held her head up and boarded the Plane of Losers. "See you, peasants!"
Chris turned to the camera. "There's our first elimination! Who will join Betti in Loserville next time? Find out right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 3- Diary of a Wimpy Penguin Hunter
Chris was seen sitting on the ice, holding a stuffed penguin. "Ah... these are so much more tame than the real thing." He held it up to the sun, examining it. "So much more tame..."
A woman dressed in nothing but a black swimsuit, holding a spaghetti gun drenched in fruit punch, came up to him. "Hello, unworthy fan. I need this land to film my new music video. I'm sure you'll understand."
Chris' eyes widened as he realized who he was talking to. "Lady Googoo? W-what are you doing here? What do you want?"
The bizarre singer shook her head. "I don't want anything. I need this land to film my new music video... Italiano."
Chris raised an eyebrow. "If that song takes place in LA, then why are you filming it here?"
Lady Googoo chuckled. "Have I ever made any sense, darling?"
Chris shook his head. "Not really."
Lady snickered. "Scurry along, now. I have to have the area clear."
Chris folded his arms. "What gives you the right to..."
A gigantic bulldozer came in, almost running over Chris.
Chris shrieked and ran for dear life. "I surrender!" He ducked behind the Freezing Seals' tent. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica." He panted. "The two teams were put to the test in the very first challenge of the season. Love began between Dustine and Betti, and Ronald failed to ally with Meagan and Kortney, who was already allied with Jennette. In the end, Mr. McLean's Penguins pulled off a win at the last minute, and the Seals sent Betti packing. Who will follow Betti in the loser plane right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Luc was shown outside his team tent, plucking at his guitar, as usual. He shook his head and frowned, as usual. "Let's try this..." He muttered and began to sing. "Hello, hello Lady, your dress, it's made of random things. They keep playin' your song in the club you sing, sing. W-w-what was that line, are you singing in Spanish? Sorry I hate your music, it's kind of freaky. K-k-kind of freaky. K-k-kind of freaky."
Lady Googoo was shown standing right next to him. She had her arms folded, pouting. "That Lady better not be me."
Luc's eyes widened as he began to pick her pockets for money, finding only several melting myPods. He sighed in depression and ran away, frightened. "Guess I'll have to just try my luck and hope to win this game." He shook his head. "As if I could win. Having the poor guy who needs the money the most is so cheesy. The author would never allow it."
Franklin came into the tent, panting. "It's the penguins... they're after me again."
Bunny shook her head. "You just don't understand nature, do you?"
Franklin scowled. "I understand that nature is cruel and hideous."
"...Compare nature to New York City. We still have some elements of nature." Bunny reasoned.
Franklin shook his head. "I don't get you naturalist monkeys. You're acting like we live in the 1700s or something."
Bunny bit her lip. "Is all you care about money?"
Franklin scoffed. "Of course not. I care about banks, piggy banks, swear jars..." He looked away lovingly.
A quarter rolled into the tent.
Franklin smirked and tried to reach at it, only to have it be moved away by a string. He purred angrily and chased it outside, where the penguins finished their trap and attacked him. He was heard screaming from outside.
Bunny held back a smile briefly before letting out a giggle.
Lily pointed towards the sky and chuckled. "That cloud reminds me of you." She stared at the floor. "So does the ice. And the snow. And the..."
Rufus snickered. "I see you've been thinking of me, Lily bear. Ah... isn't love wonderful?"
Lily nodded. "I haven't been this happy since I nailed my first back flip." A tear of joy sprouted from her left eye.
Rufus patted her back and smirked when she wasn't looking. "I'm sure we'll be great allies."
"Rufus is so sweet!" Lily squealed in confessional. "He's my first boyfriend in a while, with all the gymnastics practice making me busy. And he totally understands me. I mean, not many guys get my bubbly personality. Some also say that I'm really hyper and have a short attention span. I'm not hyper, right? Totally not hyper. Right? IamtotallynothyperatallandIdidn'thaveanycoffeethismorning! And my attention span is okay. I mean, why--" She looked at a penguin in the distance. "OMG, it's a penguin."
Rufus was shown in confessional, cackling. "Lily, Lily, Lily. That sucker. I've seen some easy girls to trick, but her? I had her under my spell after fifteen seconds. If she only knew my true intention..." His voice trailed off and he began to laugh sadistically again. "Oh, this game is as good as mine."
Keetin was shown calmly painting a penguin on a white canvas. "Black and white, black and white, black and white." She continued to gently fill in the lines she had sketched with a pencil.
Foxface was watching the blonde artist from a distance, thinking about her as an ally or adversary. She smirked amusedly and wrote down notes in a notebook she was holding.
"Hiya." Keetin greeted, now right beside Foxface.
Foxface leaped up, startled. She glared at Keetin suspiciously.
Keetin rolled her eyes playfully. "Looks like I surprised you there, Foxface."
Foxface blushed. She looked toward the side.
Keetin raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing here, anyway?"
Foxface blushed deeper and simply scurried away, into the shadows.
Keetin raised an eyebrow. "Foxface seriously creeps me out." She shuddered in confessional. "I mean, the girl's kind of... stalker-y. I feel like she's always watching me."
Foxface crept up behind her.
Keetin shrugged. "Maybe it's just my imagination."
Meagan was shown lying on her sleeping bag, listening to her myPod. "I kissed a nerd and I liked it. The taste of his dirty braces. I kissed a nerd at a party..." She half-mumbled, half-sung.
Ronald peered his head above her. "Hi."
Meagan jumped. "Oh, it's you. What do you want this time?"
Ronald blushed. "You see, I was thinking about our alliance and..."
Meagan rolled her eyes. "What alliance? If you don't remember, I said no."
Ronald nodded. "Yes, but, I was thinking that we could make a good duo. What me with my knowledge of the previous season and you with your weak physical ability."
Meagan scowled. "It sounds like you just insulted me."
Ronald shook his head. "No, you see, I was saying... did you know Jena won the Perfect Attendance Award when she was in the sixth grade?"
Meagan face-palmed and threw Ronald out the tent's flap.
Ronald faceplanted onto the ice and slid until he fell into ice water and froze into a solid cube.
Meagan smirked and chuckled.
Zanibanito was bothering a female intern a few yards away. "How's the Sprit can killing the golden fox?!"
The attractive, black-haired intern rolled her eyes. "You're weird. Why'd I even sign up for this?" She pulled out a clipboard and stared at a picture of a white puppy dog named Joe. "Oh, yeah..." She stared at the picture.
Zanibanito snickered at the picture. "Want to be my girlfriend? We could tear the stoplights off of the chicken wings in Cuba."
The intern began to sweat. "Um, I have a boyfriend. His name is..." She saw a male intern walk by and grabbed him by the shirt collar. "Bob."
The male intern said nothing, staring blankly at the female.
Zanibanito looked towards the sky, yelling. "No! Why must the evil god of gum keep us from tearing apart the diddly bops?"
The female intern simply sighed and looked at her supposed boyfriend. "Got anything to eat?"
The male took out an ice cream sundae, which she began to enjoy. "I love sugar."
Zanibanito got up and attempted to steal away the dessert. "Gimme that silver dynamite."
The girl simply swatted his hand away and kicked him in the crotch.
Zanibanito curled up on the floor, defeated.
Dustine was shown on the ground, sobbing. "W-why? Why Betti? I was just trying to give the world one less lonely girl. Was that so bad to ask?! Baby..."
Jennette was sitting by Kortney, excited. "Eee! That cow Betti is gone. Now's my time to make my move on Dustine."
Kortney shook his head. "I don't get why so many girls fall for him. He's just a talentless little kid who got famous because a stupid music producer misspelled 'beaver.'"
Jennette shook his head. "You're just jealous, partner. Dustine is a great singer, who deserves his fame."
"Yeah." Kortney scoffed. "And I'm the Queen of England. Seriously, I bet he doesn't even have a di--"
"Hush, hush." Jennette inturrupted. "I'mma going to make my move on Dustine." She walked up to the terrible singer.
"Hey there, other baby." Dustine greeted. "I see you want to get a taste of my charm."
Jennette began to get nervous but smiled. "Oh, uh, hi there, partner, urm, um, Dustine. How ya doin'?"
Dustine bit his lower lip. "I'm crying over my baby, Betti. Why'd she have to go?!"
Jennette clenched her fists. "Oh, I'm sure there was a good reason, partner. I mean, she could've... been..."
Dustine began to cry again.
Kortney took out Pepe and began using it to talk. "Hey, Kortney, why are we in some mindless drama scene? This is like Lizard Ball X." He began to talk in his regular voice. "No, Pepe. That's the show with mindless violence."
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge. "Today's challenge is going to include a little of getting in touch with nature."
Bunny cheered and put her hands up. "This challenge was made for me!"
Franklin groaned and rolled his eyes.
"Each team will get some bait and a burlap sack to catch a penguin." Chris continued. "The first team to bring back a penguin and show it to me wins an all-expense-paid dinner buffet in their tent tonight."
The teens discussed the reward.
Allan chuckled. "Woah. I love buffets. As long as they have buffalo wings, you know!"
Many contestants got hungry thinking about it.
Luc's eyes widened. "For the first time in six years, I can have civilized food!" He was moved to tears.
Dustine scoffed. "I finally get the treatment I got back home, which I deserve." He cocked his head.
"Now that I've given you all some motivation..." Chris snickered. "Go ahead and start the challenge." He threw the bait and sack at them, and they ran off.
Bunny sighed deeply. "I can't believe we're abusing nature for a challenge."
Keetin ignored her and attempted to creep up on a penguin. She was unable to grab it before it scurried away. "Aw..."
Lily pounced onto a penguin and grabbed hold of it. "Get the sack!"
Rufus scurried over with the sack, but failed to reach her as the penguin escaped.
Lily moaned and shook her head.
Franklin folded his arms. "If you ask me, this is a waste of a challenge. Nature. Pssht. We should just put Luc into the sack. He counts as an animal."
Luc blushed. "Hey..!" He looked around for an excuse to change the subject.
Keetin glared at Franklin. "Nice..." She muttered sarcastically.
Rufus rolled his eyes. "We should just split up instead of standing here stupidly wasting time."
Lily beamed and went over to Rufus. "I call Rufus!"
The others on the team murmured in agreement and walked away in groups.
The other team was having a little more luck.
Jennette was using her experience with animals to draw the penguin near, using the bait. "Come on, penguin. Come to mama."
Kortney facepalmed. "Is this really the, urm, professional way to catch a penguin?"
Jennette shrugged. "I live in Alabama. There are no penguins over there."
Kortney shook his head woefully.
Dustine smirked. "I'll call the penguins near by using my beautiful voice! Baby, baby, baby, ohhhh!"
The penguin that was almost in Jennette's hand took off, waddling for its life.
Jenette sighed. "Looks them penguins have no music taste, partner."
Kortney rolled his eyes. "Yeah, they're the ones with no taste. Nice job, penguins!"
Dustine grimaced. "Are you saying you don't like my music?"
Kortney rolled his eyes. "It's not that, it's just... You sound like someone's stranging like a cat that's running its claws across a chalkboard."
Dustine fell to the floor and began to weep.
"Now, look what you went and did!" Jennette scolded and sat down to comfort Dustine.
Allan stared at the three for a minute. "Um, moving on... what are we supposed to do, bro?"
Meagan shrugged. "Why don't we just put the bait out and wait for a penguin to come by? It seems like not that much effort."
Cristen nodded. "Just like most of my terrible home movies."
Cristen was shown with her boyfriend, holding his hand.
"Cristen." He whispered. "Will you marry me?"
Cristen shrugged. "Well, like, this is just a home movie, Edgar. I don't, like, think I can, like, do this."
The scene cut back to the compeition.
"...Right." Meagan chuckled.
Ronald shrugged and put the bait out while Kortney waited with the sack.
Luc and Bunny were shown walking together.
"Thanks for agreeing to walk with me, Bunny." He thanked. "Not many people want to hang out with me back home."
Bunny grinned. "No problem. Your odor reminds me of nature."
Luc's smile dropped. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Bunny giggled. "You tell me."
Luc shrugged it off and continued to walk, searching for a penguin. "Come on, penguin, penguin, penguin."
Bunny shook her head. "That is the worst penguin call I have ever heard. Try this on for size." She made a call imitating a penguin.
A penguin went over to Bunny, cuddling her like the one from the day before did.
Luc smirked. "Rufus! Get over here!"
Rufus and Lily ran over, holding the sack.
Rufus grinned. "Gimme the penguin, Bunny."
Bunny shook her head. "I would never defy nature for a simple challenge. This is inhumane."
Rufus scowled. "Bunny, hand over the freaking penguin and we'll win the challenge. Come on. Gimme it."
Bunny turned around, refusing to obey.
Rufus clenched his fists. "Listen, Bunny, if you don't hand that thing over right now, I swear I'm going to--"
He was inturrupted by Zanibanito, who popped up out of nowhere and threw the penguin across the ice, making it slide into the distance. "Haha! That penguin is no match for my intelligent plastic owls!"
Rufus stared ahead, awe-strucken. "W-what? W-why'd you do that?"
Bunny also had this expression. "That was animal cruelty." She grimaced and punched Zanibanito in the face, giving him a black eye.
Zanibanito groaned. "Omomnomnom..." He fell to the ground, unconsious.
Luc facepalmed. "This can't get any worse."
The Freezing Seals then ran by with their sack full.
Lily shook her head and sighed sadly.
Chris was shown calmly sipping from a mug of hot chocolate. "Come on... how long does it take to capture a stupid penguin?"
The Seals came by with their prize.
"Chris! Chris! Chris!" Dustine called. "We actually won this time!"
Chris opened up the sack and nodded. "The Freezing Seals win!"
The Seals cheered, not having to vote off another member.
Meagan smirked. "Looks like it's my idea that got us the buffet."
Chris nodded. "Seals, a fabulous buffet will be waiting for you at your tent."
Several interns carrying dinner carts walked over to the tent.
The Seals cheered once more and walked over to them, excited.
Mr. McLean's Penguins trudged over to Chris.
"We lost, didn't we?" Keetin sighed.
Chris nodded. "Penguins, I'll be seeing you at elimination tonight. I'm sure you're all looking forward to it."
The team glared at Bunny and Zanibanito.
The team was seen at elimination, exchanging awkward glances.
"Penguins, if you do not recieve a snowball, you will be forced to take the Plane of Losers out of here." Chris explained. "The first snowballs go to Luc, Keetin, Foxface."
The three cheered and were hit by the snowballs.
"Franklin." Chris continued. "You are safe. So are Rufus and Lily."
The next three cheered as well.
"Bunny, you refused to help your team during the challenge. Zanibanito, you let the penguin escape."
Zanibanito and Bunny exchanged nervous glances.
"The final snowball goes to...
Bunny sighed in relief.
"Looks like my idiotic teammates decided to give you another chance." Franklin grumbled.
Rufus shook his head. "Nah, we just wanted Zaniwhaever out of here."
Zanibanito scowled. "Why must the rainbow markers kill the sparkly elephant?!" He exploded, literally, ina flash of purple and golden confetti."
"...Um, what?" Keetin chuckled.
Chris turned to the camera with eyes wide. "Tune in to see what happens next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 4- Blizzards of Waverly Place
A logo for a news network titled "Southern News Network" popped up on screen. It zoomed into the word "news" and cut to an African-American man dressed in a suit and tie. "This just in, police arrested teen pop star Dustine Believer today for..."
A different man came by and pushed him out of the way. "I told you not to turn this into one of your comedy acts, John."
John frowned. "Aw... but I was getting to the story about Key$ha."
His supposed coworker facepalmed. "Just stay out of the way." He sat down at the desk and faced the camera. "This just in, a blizzard hits the filming location of the new reality show, Total Drama Antarctica. The contestants, host, and crew are all desperate to find shelter and protection. We have reporter Hilda Hildegard live on the scene with TV host, Chris McLean."
"Thanks, Stan." Hilda thanked, wearing fur coat and standing with Chris in Antarctica. "I'm here with Chris McLean, host of Total Drama Antarctica."
Chris was shivering, almost being unable to be seen by the heavy snowfall. "H-h-hello, Hilda. You look l-l-lovely today." He shivered.
Hilda rolled her eyes. "Chris, how do you feel about the unfortunate weather conditions right now?"
Chris shuddered. "Today's episode will go as planned, with no intrusion... although, I might have to come up with a new c-c-challenge."
Hilda nodded. "Stay tuned to find out how the contestants and crew react to this storm."
Chris leaned into her. "Um, can I have that mic? There's a little recap thing I do every episode."
Hilda facepalmed. "Um, sir, we really need to move on. There much more... interesting stories than this one."
Chris stole away the mic, ignoring her comment. "L-l-last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the two teams were locked in a challenge to remember: capturing an innocent penguin. The Penguins faced some difficulty when Bunny refused to hand over the penguin she caught. And when Zanibanito ruined their chances of victory completely, the Freezing Seals won the challenge and the dinner buffet prize. Let's seen how Mr. McLean's Penguins do with Zanibanito gone, and how the Seals cope with the blizzard ruining their buffet."
Hilda folded her arms. "Done, yet?"
Chris ignored her again. "Find out right now on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Hilda scowled and stole the mic back.
The Freezing Seals were shown at their tent, enjoying the buffet they won earlier that day.
Kortney was telling his alliance member a story. "So, then, Shanaynay was all like, 'Girl, you ain't gettin' away that.' And so Brittany said, 'Ugh, like, there is no way you're going to get to--'"
"Hey, Kortney." Jennette interrupted. "I've thinkin'. I should make my move on Dustine. We're at a buffet right now, all casual-like. I'mma go over there and ask him to start courtin' me."
Kortney scowled. "Why do you like her so much...? I mean, him. Er... whatever. Besides, his voice is at least ten times higher than mine is. Not to mention at least eight times higher than yours."
Jennette shook her head. "Partner, you're just a Anti-Believer. Dustine is the most talented boy in the entire country. Maybe even the world. Don't be in denial."
Kortney gagged. "I have to go outside... just some... undercooked meat." He rushed outside.
Jennette raised an eyebrow, hearing Kortney violently upchuck from outside.
She shrugged it off and went over to Dustine. "Hey, there, partner. How you doin'?"
Dustine shrugged. "Betti... I still miss her. This reminds me of when my first love broke my heart for the first time. I was all like, 'Baby, baby, baby, baby, oh...'" He looked down sadly. "I would never leave her. Betti... if you're listening out there... I just want to be with you. Because then, there'd be one less lonely girl."
Jenette scowled. "You know, I heard she has a zit."
Dustine's despair faded. "Never mind, I'm over her. So, what did you want to tell me?"
Jennette blushed and began to sweat. She looked around. "Well, you see partner..." She began to hyperventilate and fainted.
Dustine shrugged and smirked. "That's the usual reaction to being in my presence."
Meagan was seen munching away at chicken wings and cupcakes.
Ronald went up to her. "Hey, Meagan. I was wondering, about that alliance... I've made several calculations about who to eliminate next."
Meagan scowled. "For the last time, we are not in an alliance. Now let me enjoy my dinner in peace."
Ronald bit his lip. "Um, I was just wondering..."
Meagan facepalmed. "Look, Ronald. I don't know what your problem is, but--"
Ronald's eyes widened. "It's midnight."
Meagan sighed. "...And?"
Ronald shook his head. "Today's N's birthday." He squealed and gathered his teammates' attention.
The others looked up.
"Attention, everyone." Ronald continued. "Today is N's birthday. Let us celebrate."
His teammates facepalmed.
Meagan rolled her eyes. "Your obcession is disgusting." She belched.
Allan shrugged. "It's a reason to party... I'll take it!" He began to conga.
Kortney, Jennette, and Dustine shrugged and joined him.
Cristen looked at the ground. "What's the point of partying? Like, we're all, like, going to..." Her voice trailed off.
Allan rolled his eyes. "Lighten up, Cristen."
Kortney chuckled. "I don't think she physically can."
The others laughed.
Cristen just stared at them blankly.
Allan raised an eyebrow. "Ok... now, she's just scaring me."
Lily took sighed deeply. "Isn't this romantic, Rufus?"
Rufus nodded. "Yeah. But none of those stars can compare to your beauty."
Lily giggled. "Oh, Rufus, stop..."
Rufus smirked. "How easy can this be?" He snickered in confessional. "Even at this early point, Lily is already a pawn in my elaborate plan to win the million. The girl would never even suspect me as the villain. She's not exactly the sharpest tool in the shed."
Lily continued to stare up at the stars. "Rufus..."
Rufus looked over at her.
"Do you believe in love at first sight?" Lily asked.
Rufus nodded, keeping a straight face. "Of course I do. Especially on a romantic night like this one." He snapped his fingers. "Hey, peasant boy! Play us some romantic music!"
Luc ran over and began to play a romantic song. "Right on it, Rufus. No problem, Rufus."
Rufus glared over at him. "Slower."
Luc played a slower romantic song.
Bunny was shown in the confessional the next morning. "Ok... so that was kind of a close call last night at elimination. I let my love of nature interfere with the challenge at hand, and my team had to make me face the consequences. Anyway, I could use some allies in this game. Maybe... Keetin?"
Keetin was seen skipping around. "I'm just doing something random, waiting for one of the author's plots to find me..." She hummed.
Bunny went over to her. "Um... hello, Keetin. I was just wondering... how are you doing?"
Keetin grinned. "Great."
Bunny began to sweat nervously. "Um... I was wondering... what do you think of an alliance in this game? I mean, for all we know, we might not get tomorrow... wait, I wasn't supposed to say something like that..."
Keetin chuckled. "You're funny. I would love to be in an alliance. So... who do you think we should vote out next?"
"Franklin." Bunny growled without hesitation. "Franklin."
Keetin nodded. "So, don't we need like two other people in the alliance?"
Bunny shrugged. "I guess... we'll cross that bridge when we get to it?"
Keetin nodded. "...Do you ever get the feeling you're being watched?"
Foxface was stalking the two from a distance. She snickered and shook her head.
Franklin was sitting in a tent, listening to his myPod. "Radio station..." He mumbled. "Forget about the price tag..." He scowled. "I hate that song." He pushed a button on it. "Money, money, money... much better."
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge. The blizzard was still raging.
"As you can see." Chris explained. "Today's weather is a little... unpleasant. Today's challenge will be one of endurance." He motioned to fourteen tall platforms, each with a ladder leading up to the top.
"...This seems fun." Meagan remarked.
"Your challenge is to withstand the freezing weather and fast-falling snow." Chris continued. "Last one standing wins for their team. You may begin."
The fourteen remaining contestants climbed onto the platforms and began to balance.
Franklin, Keetin, and Ronald all immediately fell down.
Franklin faceplanted onto the ice. "...That didn't feel good."
Keetin sighed deeply. "Tough challenge."
Ronald smirked. "My team seems to have an advantage now."
The blizzard continued to blow.
Luc squinted to see. "I'm not moving from this spot..."
Jennette and Kortney were next to each other.
"How ya holdin' up, partner?" Jennette asked.
Kortney shrugged. "Ok... How about you?"
"We don't have weather like this back home." Jennette replied. "It's getting kind of--" She fell off the platform.
Kortney groaned and followed close behind.
Jennette moaned. "How long is this gonna take?"
Luc and Foxface fell off soon after.
Luc fell onto the snow with a thud. "...That sucked."
Foxface scowled and stared at the ones still in.
Meagan was sitting down on her platform, barely trying. She fell off eventually, landing next to Ronald. "Ugh... Ronald."
Ronald looked at her awkwardly.
Bunny fell from the platform, landing near the others. "With me gone, there are five left in the challenge..."
Chris nodded. "Which means it's time to step it up a bit!" He snapped his fingers.
A few interns came in, carrying a catapult and several large items. They put a sofa onto the catapult and launched it at Dustine.
Dustine was hit by it and fell to the ground with a crash.
The interns cheered.
"Down with Believer!" One chanted.
Jennette gasped. "You're just haters!" She ran over to Dustine. "Dustine... speak to me, partner."
Dustine moaned. "Jennette... remember me as a dashing, young pop star." He fainted.
Jennette began to wail.
Kortney facepalmed. "He's not even dead, he's unconsious... unfortunately."
The interns shot two bathtubs at the remaining players.
Cristen and Lily were hit and fell to the ground.
Lily groaned. "Win for all of us, Rufus!"
Rufus nodded and looked forward intently.
Cristen moaned. "That was, like, so pathetic..."
Allan looked over at his fallen teammates. "Don't worry, dudes! I'll win for you!"
The interns began to fire at the two rather quickly.
Allan and Rufus both dodged, before Allan was finally hit by an anvil.
Allan fell to the ground. "...Looks like we lost."
Rufus scoffed. "As always, I am the victor." He climbed down from the platform.
Chris nodded. "Mr. McLean's Penguins win and the Freezing Seals go to elimination tonight. You'll have some time to decide your vote."
Meagan glared at Ronald. "Team, I have a suggestion for you tonight." She went to consult her team members.
The Freezing Seals were shown at elimination that night.
"Seals." Chris scolded. "Today's challenge was a close one. But in the end, you guys ended up here. The first two snowballs go to Allan and Jennette."
Allan and Jennette cheered.
"Kortney." Chris continued. "And Cristen. You two are safe as well."
Kortney cheered and high-fived Jennette.
Cristen simply shrugged.
"Meagan. You are safe." Chris called.
Meagan smirked at Ronald.
"...Ronald. You've been annoying and tiring." Chris scolded. "Dustine... pretty much the same thing. The final snowball goes to...
Dustine squealed and was hit by the snowball.
Ronald looked down, devastated. "B-but... why?"
Meagan gave him a thumbs-down.
Ronald was shown in confessional. "Looks like my knowledge failed me. This would be the first time, actually. And I do admit... I had a crush on Meagan. I shouldn't have let it get in the way of the game. Looks like my time here is up."
He was shown getting into the plane and departing.
"That's another teen out of here." Chris closed. "What will happen next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 5- Mascot for a Day
Chris was shown sitting down, sipping a cup of hot chocolate and angrily taking a phone call. "What do you mean that's against animal rights?!" He demanded. The other person talked for a minute. "Well then, what am I supposed to do for a challenge?!" The other person talked again for a while. "What do you mean you don't care?!" He furiously hung up. He faced the camera. "Oh, um... welcome to Total Drama. We were just having some... technical difficulties."
"Technical difficulties meaning you getting angry over a challenge." Phil mumbled from behind the camera.
Chris faced him directly. "Aren't you supposed to be dead?"
Phil shrugged. "I got better."
Chris rolled his eyes. "Last time on Total Drama: Paradise Beach--"
"Wrong line." Phil sighed.
Chris facepalmed. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the two teams faced off in an endurance challenge... one much similar to that one in Paradise Beach. Anyway, Rufus was the last one standing, winning for the Penguins. Ronald's annoying knowledge and persistance to get Meagan into an alliance ultimately cost him the game. What will happen this time on Total...Drama...Antarctica!"
Lily was seen in confessional. "Ah... could life be any better? My relationship with Rufus is the best I've ever had. I mean, he's just so romantic and nice."
She was shown with Rufus, sitting outside the tent, conversing. "So, Rufus... what's your idea of a perfect date?"
Rufus smirked. "Doesn't matter, as long as we're both happy."
Lily giggled and nodded. "Thanks... so, in three words, how would you describe me?"
Rufus smirked again. "Beautiful, intelligent, and romatic."
Lily blushed. "Same to you. So... how do you like gymnastics?"
Rufus shrugged. "I love it, as long as you do. I love anything you do."
Lily blushed more and playfully punched Rufus in the shoulder. "Oh, Rufus, stop..."
Rufus was shown in confessional. "This couldn't get much easier. Lily's attracting to me like moths are attracted to a light. I mean, some girls have fallen hard for me. But Lily... she worships me. At this rate, I'll soon have a monopoly in this game. Kiss your chances of winning away, because one by one, they'll all go down."
Rufus was shown outside the confessional, talking to Franklin.
Franklin rolled his eyes. "Why should I trust you?"
Rufus smirked. "I only betray girls. And last time I checked, you are not a girl."
Franklin raised an eyebrow. "How do I know you're not going to bail on the deal after I do my end?"
"What would I gain by tricking you?" Rufus countered.
Franklin nodded and pursed his lips. "...Fine. It's a deal."
Rufus shook Franklin's hand, deviously smirking.
Luc was peering at them through the flap. He jumped back, shocked. "What is Rufus trying to pull here?" He demanded in confessional. "He's trying to get Franklin to do... something. ...That's not what she said. I swear, there's something up with him. And Lily's falling for him hard..." He looked up. "I better stop talking. He's always watching me..."
Luc was shown outside, sitting down on the ice. He spied on Lily and Rufus through binoculars.
Lily and Rufus were conversing quietly.
Luc squinted in order to see them better. "What are they doing...?"
Lily hugged Rufus tightly.
Luc sighed deeply. "She's falling for him. Hard."
Rufus' eyes widened. He pointed directly at Luc.
Luc panicked and sprinted away. "I was never here!"
Rufus folded his arms. "Stalker."
Lily nodded. "Why would he think anything is up with our wonderful relationship?"
Rufus shrugged. "Oh, I don't know..." He mumbled slyly.
"So, you want us to vote out Franklin?" Keetin asked.
Bunny nodded in response. "He's the weakest one on our team, I guess. I mean, he could easily be bought by money."
Keetin nodded back.
"We need two more votes to get rid of him, though..." Keetin mumbled.
Bunny shrugged. "I'm sure our teammates will see it our way after Franklin has a little... accident during the challenge."
Keetin raised an eyebrow. "...The way you said that sounds strangely suspicious."
Bunny shrugged. "Don't worry. He'll be okay... with a little luck."
Keetin backed away. "Looks like you just can't mess with nature around you."
Foxface was shown spying on the two girls, cackling.
Keetin suddenly appeared behind her. "Hey, Foxface."
Keetin giggled. "So, I was wondering... do you want to help Keetin and I vote out Franklin?"
Foxface but her lip.
Keetin shrugged. "You're either with us or against us."
Keetin raised an eyebrow. "So, you are with us?"
Foxface nodded again.
Keetin squealed. "Thanks, Foxface!"
Foxface forced a smile and nodded.
"Looks like we helped Meagan vote out Ronald last night." Kortney sighed.
Jennette nodded. "Looks like we did, partner. I was scared for a minute thar. I thought Dustine was a goner."
Kortney gritted his teeth. "Yeah. Too bad he's still here."
Jennette rolled her eyes. "Kortney. Kortney, Kortney, Kortney. I bet you're just jealous--"
"Yeah, I know." Kortney inturrupted. "You say that all the time."
"It doesn't mean it's not true..." Jennette mumbled. "How could you not like him?"
"Easy." Kortney chuckled. "Just notice that he has an awful voice, abhorrent fashion sense, and looks like he's five years old."
Jennette shook her head and sighed. "That is so not true, partner."
Kortney squinted. "Oh, Jennette. You're just in denial."
Jennette rolled her eyes. "Well, while you stay here grumblin' like my old Gramps, I'mma go hit on Dustine."
Dustine was curled up on his bed, rocking back and forth. "I am handsome... I am a star..."
Jennette went up to him. "Hey, partner. I was wonderin'--"
Dustine handed her a slip of paper.
Jennette raised an eyebrow and read it aloud. "...'Thirty-seven.' ...What does this mean, partner?"
"I've decided that you all are not worthy of talking to me immediately." Dustine explained. "So, you have to wait and take a number, like everyone else. There are currently thirty-six people ahead of you."
Jennette squinted at him. "Um, can't we just talk for like one min--"
Dustine snapped his fingers. "Toad!"
A short, yet muscular man came in. "Yes, my master?"
Dustine scoffed. "Carry me away."
Toad grumbled but carried him on his shoulders. He looked at Jennette. "Don't sweat it, kid. He's just having a breakdown for being away from his fame-life."
Jennette frowned as Dustine was carried away.
Cristen was sitting on her bed, tapping away at her myPod.
Allan went over to her. "Whatcha doin'?"
Cristen looked at him. "I'm, like, watching a, like, TV show I, like, downloaded."
Allan looked at the screen. "Is it that one with the two weird-looking kids who do impossible things that their weird sister tries to bust them for but their pet platypus messes up her plan somehow while fighting an evil scientist?"
Cristen looked at him. "...Yes."
"Cool." Allan replied. "I loved that show, before that movie made it all terrible."
Cristen nodded. "Yeah, but like, my, like, home movies are like way more..." Her voice trailed off.
Allan looked around. "Hey... where's Meagan?"
Meagan cleared her throat, sitting on a nearby bed. "I'm right here, Einstein. I'm just not talking because the author is currently out of ideas for me."
"That happened to me once." Cristen replied. "But he got, like, inspired, by, like some cheap video."
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge.
"Greetings, contestants." Chris greeted. "Today's challenge will involve some... improvising."
The contestants exchanged glances.
"The challenge is to carry your team mascot in a dogsled, you being the dogs." Chris continued. "You will have to carry your mascot up the ice shelf, across that fragile bridge, down the shelf, and to the finish line? Any questi--"
"Another animal abuse challenge?" Bunny protested. "This is just imhumane. Mark my words, I'm going to--"
"Can it, Bunny." Chris interrupted. "Since the animal rights people wouldn't let me use real animals, we're going to have to improvise. The smallest members of each team will have to dress up in embarrassing costumes of the animal and be dragged across the course by their teammates." He threw penguin and seal suits at Luc and Dustine, respectively.
Luc grumbled. "Am I really the smallest one on the team?"
Rufus snickered and nodded.
Luc awkwardly put on the costume, despite it being much too big for him.
Keetin giggled. "You look so cute..." She said playfully.
Dustine put on the seal costume. "With this on, I'll look even cuter..."
Jennette nodded. "And you do..."
Kortney shook his head and rolled his eyes.
The teams strapped to themselves to the harnesses and took off towards the finish line.
Keetin panted. "Ugh... is this how dogs feel?"
Bunny nodded. "This experience should show us all that we should--"
"You know, Lily." Rufus cut off. "All these girls might as well be dogs... except you."
Lily giggled and nodded.
"That's more of an insult to us than a compliment to Lily..." Bunny mumbled.
Keetin rolled her eyes and pulled ahead of the others, forcing them to go faster.
Franklin sped up a bit. "This challenge sucks. I mean, who would want to pull a poor person in a sled?"
Luc shrugged. "This is my first time getting proper transportation..." He squealed.
Keetin looked at him worriedly.
Kortney was shown heavily panting, struggling to keep up with his teammates. "I... have... to... pull a sled... for someone I don't even like?!"
Jennette opened her mouth to say something.
"I know I'm in denial or whatever, Jennette." Kortney grumbled irritatedly.
Jennette blushed and nodded.
Dustine groaned. "Move it, worthless fans! I'm going to be late for my pedicure!"
Meagan was walking fairly slowly, struggling to even stay up. "What pedicure? We're in Antarctica. There are no beauty salons!"
Dustine looked around him and realized what Meagan stated was reality. He began to weep.
Allan blushed awkwardly. "Um... are we there yet?"
Mr. McLean's Penguins were shown struggling to climb the ice shelf.
"Dang it..." Franklin groaned. "How hard is it to climb a stupid ice shelf?"
Bunny sighed deeply. "You don't see many of these anymore. With all this global warming going on--"
"Save it for when you're president, Bunny." Rufus snarked.
Franklin stifled a laugh.
Bunny grinned. "You think I'll be president?"
Keetin groaned. "This... is... so... steep..."
"Yeah." Luc sighed. "This is the slowest challenge yet." He sat back, relaxed.
Rufus looked ahead. "I can't even see the other team anymore. Pick up the pace!"
The team began to go a bit faster.
The Seals were shown far ahead of the Penguins.
Meagan moaned. "I hate physical activity."
Kortney rolled his eyes. "At least you have a better body for exercise." He panted heavily.
Jennette shrugged. "This is just like back home, when we haul them crates back from the farmers' market."
Cristen sighed. "This is, like, so uncool. My boyfriend usually, like, carries me on his back 'cause, like..." Her voice trailed off.
Dustine snapped his fingers. "Speed it up, worthless little people!"
Kortney gave his an offensive hand gesture. "Said the guy who's three and a half feet tall."
Dustine gasped. "Security!" He sat there for a minute before realizing that no one was going to come to help him. He began to sob.
Jennette glared at Kortney. "Just keep your opinion to yourself, partner."
The Penguins suddenly came up behind them and pulled ahead, confidently.
Keetin giggled and stuck her tongue out at the Seals.
The Penguins reached the top, where the fragile bridge was cracked and about ready to collapse.
Lily was taken aback by this. "Okay... just step carefully and we'll be alright. I'll go first." She carefully stepped in between two cracks, keeping her feet light and quick.
Foxface nodded and smirked. She quickly lept across a few cracks, landing without even making the ice quake.
Keetin stepped forward carefully. She managed to get one foot safely on the ice, but slipped and stepped on a crack with the other.
Luc shrieked as the entire bridge rapidly cracked apart and the team was sent plummeting into freezing waters.
The team landed into freezing cold ice water.
The Seals went up to what was once a bridge.
Kortney looked over at the other side. "...Isn't this the part where that thing that failed to help us earlier helps us now?"
Two tall, muscular men came over and picked up Dustine in the sled. They threw him across the gap, taking the others with him.
The team faceplanted onto the ice.
Meagan groaned. "A little warning next time!" She grumbled.
"Looks like security finally showed up..." Dustine mumbled.
Jennette cheered. "Looks like we gonna win, y'all."
They stood up and half-walked, half-slid down the slope, crossing the finish line.
Chris was there to meet them. "Congrats, Freezing Seals!" He called. "You guys... didn't epically fail like the other team."
The Seals cheered.
Dustine fell over in the seal suit. "Somebody... get me out of this thing! Come on, worthless fans!"
Kortney facepalmed as Jennette went over to help.
The Penguins were shown in the water, shivering and exchanging glares.
Rufus and Lily looked disapprovingly over at Keetin.
Keetin blushed and sighed deeply. "This is going to be a hard vote..."
"Yeah." Rufus sighed. "You know, after Chris decides to save us."
Chris smirked from the finish line. "This is going to be good."
The Penguins were shown at elimination that night.
They exchanged glares, most of them directed at Keetin or Franklin.
"Looks like you seven are about to become six." Chris scoffed. "One of you will not recieve safety tonight, and must take the plane to... wherever you came from."
Bunny looked at her supposed alliance.
"The first couple snowballs go to Foxface..." Chris began. "And Luc."
Foxface and Luc grinned.
"Lily." Chris sighed. "Rufus. You two lovebirds are safe."
Lily squealed and hugged Rufus tightly.
"Bunny." Chris called. "You aren't leaving tonight."
Bunny sighed in relief, and gave Keetin a half-hearted thumbs-up.
Keetin looked down worriedly.
Franklin kept a straight face.
Chris smirked. "The final snowball goes to...
"No need, Chris." Franklin scoffed. "I would like to formally quit the compeition. Y'know, as long as Rufus holds up his end of the deal."
Rufus scoffed, pulled out a twenty-dollar bill, and handed it to Franklin.
Franklin stuffed it into his full-to-the-brim pocket. "So... bye, worthless teammates."
Chris facepalmed. "You're giving up a chance at one million dollars... for twenty dollars?!"
Franklin shrugged. "Sure, why not?"
Chris shook his head. "Get out. Just get out."
Franklin scoffed. "Gladly." He climbed onto the plane.
Bunny shook her head. "...What just happened?"
Keetin shrugged. "I think Rufus just indirectly saved me."
Lily looked at Rufus disapprovingly. "But... why?"
Rufus bit his lip, at a loss for words.
"That wraps up another very idiotic elimination." Chris closed. "Find out what more stupidity happens next right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 6- Standardized Antarctic Test
Chris was shown sitting at a desk, tapping away at a desktop computer. He faced it with intent eyes. "Hello, beautiful..."
The screen showed an attractive girl on webcam. "Hi. You're Chris from that one reality show, right?"
Chris nodded. "From Canada's Next Top Model."
The girl rolled her eyes. "Of course you are."
Chris winked. "But none of those girls are as beautiful as you."
"You seem like one of those stuck-up, celebrity pigs." The girl scoffed.
The camera zoomed out to show that Chris was in his underwear.
"I bet you're in your underwear right now." The girl sighed.
Chris blushed and shook his head. "That's a good one, Marissa." He began to laugh loudly and picked up a bottle of water. He continued to laugh while sipping from it, causing him to choke and fall to the ground.
Marissa's eyes widened as she disconnected from the chat.
Chris was shown lying on a hospital bed, still gagging and choking. He faced the camera weakly. "Hello, faithful viewers. I've just had a little... accident."
A tall doctor came over. "Um, Mr. McLean... I said you could go home three hours ago."
Chris ignored him. "Well, sitting in this comfy hospital bed is a great way to start out this episode. Last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the teams faced off in a race across a very fragile ice shelf. One misstep by Keetin cost the Penguins the challenge. And, for once, Dustine's undeserved fame and security came in handy for the Freezing Seals. It seemed like Keetin was doomed at elimination, but Rufus managed to save her by making a shady deal with Franklin, who quit the game for a freaking twenty dollars. What other stupid eliminations will take place? Find out next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
The doctor looked at the camera. "Hello, world...?"
Jennette was looking over at Dustine, as usual. "Ah... you know, his hit song--"
"Jennette." Kortney inturrupted. "Instead of sitting here arguing about whether or not Dustine's a talentless load of crap, let's do something to actually help us in this game."
Jennette stared at him blankly. "...Like what?"
"Well..." Kortney sighed. "We only make up two votes. We need four to get majority. Any ideas on who we use as an ally?"
Jennette nodded. "Dusti--"
"Meagan?" Kortney suggested. "I agree completely."
Kortney dragged her over to Meagan.
Meagan was sitting on her bed, half-asleep.
Jennette and Kortney sat down next to her.
"Hey, Meagan." Kortney greeted. "How are you?"
Meagan looked up at them. "Shouldn't you two be having a flame war over Mr. No Talent over there?" She pointed to Dustine.
Jennette winced. "Am I the only one who likes 'im?"
"Yes." Kortney responded. "Anyway, Meagan, what do you think about being in an alliance with us?"
Meagan shrugged. "Meh, you guys seem cool. As long as our first target is someone I don't like, I'm okay with it."
Kortney nodded. "Great. Our first target is Dusti--" He looked over at a depressed Jennette. "I mean, um, someone who's not... Dustine."
"Congratulations." Meagan chuckled. "You can name everyone on our team."
Kortney and Meagan snickered.
Jennette blushed and went outside the tent.
Kortney followed close behind.
Dustine was sitting on a rock, staring into the sky. "I don't get why I have to write a song about the beauty of nature. I'd rather right about the beauty of... something else." He slowly took out a picture of a smiling girl with black hair, looking like she belonged to Diznee Channel.
Jennette and Kortney went up to him.
Jennette turned to her ally and whispered, "Since you don't like 'im, partner, I think it'd be better if I'd handle this--" She looked up to see that Kortney was gone. She looked around awkwardly, shrugged, and went up to Dustine.
"So, um, partner..." Jennette sighed.
"I will not date a disturbing peasant like you!" Dustine gasped. "At least not before seeing you in a swimsuit."
Jennette blushed. "Um... I was going to ask... do you wanna join an alliance?"
Dustine nodded slowly. "With all the idiots who envy me and want to steal my fame, I suppose I'll have to join an alliance. Sure. Who else is in it?"
"Meagan and Kortney..." Jennette whispered.
Dustine's eyes widened. "Haters! They just make me more famous!" He cackled evilly.
Jennette backed away slowly.
"Hey, Cristen." Allan whispered. "What do you think our teammates are doing out there? They're all, like, talking."
Cristen glared at him. "That 'like' thing is, like, mine. You are, like, totally uncool for, like, stealing that." She stared down at the floor. "Yeah, so, like..." Her voice trailed off.
Allan chuckled. "Don't sweat it, Crissy. I get that it's your thing. No worries."
Cristen squinted her eyes at the floor, but said nothing.
Allan stared at her. "Yeah... since this seems like one of those scenes where the author is going to make a new relationship, I'm going to bail. I bet our teammates could use some company out there. He ran out yelling, "Party!"
Cristen looked after him. "I would, like, totally go after, like, him, but that would, like, totally ruin the reference I make, by, like, just..." Her voice trailed off.
Keetin and Bunny were shown strategizing.
"So... that was a really close call last night." Keetin sighed.
Bunny nodded. "We really have to make sure we get majority next time."
Keetin shrugged. "I think Rufus actually helped us, by eliminating Franklin and saving me in the process. Think we can get him as an ally?"
"I don't think his intention was to save you..." Bunny muttered.
Keetin looked at her with a half-frown.
Bunny giggled. "I mean, um, I'm sure he meant to save you. I wonder why."
Keetin grinned. "Must be because of his smoothness with the ladies." She looked into the distance lovingly.
Bunny scratched her chin in thought. "Well... I have to go, um... yell at Luc for not recycling."
Keetin nodded and chuckled. "See you later, Bunny!"
Bunny looked at the camera. "I know what that statement sounded like, but I am one hundred percent straight."
Lily was shown scolding Rufus, rather shockingly.
"How could you just help out someone like Keetin?!" She demanded. "You said I was practically the only girl in the world to you!"
Rufus faked a smile nervously. "Well, I couldn't just let her go. I mean, Franklin wasn't at all useful."
Lily's eye twitched. "B-but... you voted for her! We agreed on it!"
Rufus began to sweat. "Well, you see, I just wanted Franklin out, no matter who was in the bottom two with him."
Lily muttered something inappropriate. "B-but... you know, maybe you're right. I've always kind of been the jealous type. I mean, one of my ex-boyfriends broke up with me because I saw him talk to another girl and locked her in the janitor's closet. I mean, I never got why he got so mad. It's what any girl would have done. And, how was I supposed to know she was his sister?"
Rufus' eyes widened. "Yeah... right. I'd never get that angry if you locked my sister in a closet... you know, if I had a sister."
Lily nodded eagerly. "Kay-kay! We can go back to being happy little lovebirds now!" She grinned.
Rufus raised an eyebrow. "...Right."
"What is up with her?" Rufus sighed in confessional. "One minute, she's perfectly happy, falling for my little trick. The next, she's one of those jealous-types. I mean, she locked her ex's sister in a closet just because he talked to her?! She may not be mad at me anymore, but Keetin's going to have to get a bodyguard if this keeps up." He let out a deep sigh. "How long is it 'til I can get a different girl and start cheating? Wait, I think I already have another one at home. What was her name? Katrina? Sabrina? Meh, doesn't matter anymore."
Lily was shown in confessional. "I'm not mad at Rufus anymore... but Keetin..." She held up an obviously rubber knife. "She'll have to watch out." She accidentally dropped it onto her knee. It simply bounced off, leaving no pain or mark. "...Oh my..." Lily fell onto the floor.
Luc was shown strumming his guitar and singing along. "I want to see your zebra-bra-bra-bra..."
Foxface was stalking him from behind the tent.
Luc sighed. "Why do I keep writing songs that make fun of other songs?"
Foxface held binoculars to her eyes, getting a better view of Luc. She opened her mouth to say something to herself, before remembering the author doesn't give her any dialouge.
Luc glared directly at her. "Is there something you want, or..."
Foxface blushed and went back into hiding.
Luc facepalmed. "That was... nice."
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge. Twelve desks were set up in front of them. Each had a sheet of paper and a pencil on it.
Luc blushed. "I haven't seen one of those... things in a while. Not since I ran away."
"You mean the desks?" Meagan scoffed.
Luc shrugged. "Those wooden things with chairs attached to them, yeah."
"Contestants." Chris explained. "Since you all are all too dumb enough to study during the summer..."
Many of the players glared at him.
"...We'll be taking a little test today." The arrogant host continued. "About the history and geography of Antarctica."
Allan immediately fell over asleep. "Tests... boring... must party..." He mumbled in his sleep.
Dustine folded his arms. "There is no way I'm going to something resembling public school. I am way too famous for that. I get homeschooled by the best teachers in the country."
"Really?" Jennette squealed. "I'm homeschooled too!"
"By teachers only rich people can afford?" Dustine asked, his mouth drooling for money.
"...No. By my mom..." Jennette mumbled.
Luc began to sweat nervously. "Um... I don't really like this..."
Chris nodded. "That's right. The Penguins may be at a disadvantage. May I add that Luc ran away before he could even start the fifth grade?"
His teammates glared at Luc worriedly.
Luc shook his head and looked down.
"Ah, school..." Rufus sighed. "This brings back such fond memories. Hot girlfriends, other guys competing for them who mysteriously disappeared..."
Lily smirked at Keetin. "Just like Keetin will, soon..."
Keetin backed away worriedly.
"I will ask a question." Chris explained. "And you all will write down the answer. After I finish the five questions, the team with the most collective points will be the winners. Sit down, idiotic teens."
The contestants rolled their eyes but sat down as they were told.
Chris read the first question aloud. "First question. True or False: Antarctica has no permanent inhabitants."
The contestants nodded. They wrote down their answers.
Luc leaned over to look at Allan's paper, only to see that he was doing just as badly.
"Eyes on your own paper, Luc." Chris scolded.
Luc nodded and sunk down in his seat.
Kortney hid his paper from Dustine, who was peering over.
Dustine held out a crisp fifty-dollar bill.
Kortney looked around and stuffed it into his pocket.
Dustine looked over at his teammate's paper.
Kortney hid it away, smirking.
"Second question." Chris continued. "Name one country that claims a part of Antarctica."
Bunny folded her arms, obviously disapproving of the country owning that region, and wrote down an answer.
Meagan shrugged, obviously not knowing the answer. She wrote down a random country she considered to be advanced, and put her pencil down calmly.
Allan was asleep on his desk, a blank sheet of notebook paper next to him.
Lily wrote down an answer, after swiftly looking over at Rufus' paper.
Rufus winked at her, obviously letting her copy off of him.
Luc began to strain his mind, until he came up with an answer. The camera zoomed in to his paper, showing that he had put "Atlantis."
Foxface wrote down an answer quickly, obviously being the most intelligent of the twelve remaining.
"Next question." Chris sighed. "Name one Antarctic species that is now extinct."
Bunny immediately knew the answer to this one. She scribbled the answer up, furiously gripping the pencil.
Luc nodded, feeling confident, marked the answer down as "unicorn."
Rufus leaned over and showed his paper to Lily.
Lily nodded eagerly and copied off him.
Keetin shrugged, showing no real interest in the paper.
Jennette leaned over to see Dustine's paper, trusting his answer despite the fact that he was also struggling with that question.
Dustine smirked and showed off his paper.
Kortney rolled his eyes and shook his head.
Dustine blew a raspberry at him.
"Quiet, teen pop star." Chris disciplined. "Question number four. True or False: This whole challenge is pretty much just the author parodying the fact that all kids' shows have to have a certain amount of educational content."
All the contestants, excluding Allan, who was asleep, knew the answer to this one immediately.
Rufus leaned his paper over to Lily, but she shook her head and gave a thumbs-up.
Dustine gave Kortney a thumbs-up.
Kortney simply rolled his eyes and scowled.
Jennette giggled and wrote down the answer.
Meagan rolled her eyes at the question but wrote down the correct response.
"Fifth and final question." Chris announced. "Train A leaves the station at 8:15 AM. Train B leaves the station at 10:45 AM. If both trains travel at a speed of 59.2 miles per hour, then what is the name of Train A's conductor?"
Only Foxface knew the answer immediately.
"...That question doesn't even make any sense." Kortney mumbled.
Rufus shook his head. "How is that even related to Antarctica?"
Luc began to sweat and banged his head on the table. "SOMEONE! LET ME COPY OFF OF YOU!"
Cristen shrugged and wrote down an answer.
Keetin leaned over and copied off of Foxface, wide-eyed at her answer.
"No looking at other people's papers and no talking!" Chris disciplined.
"Why do you even care?" Meagan retorted. "I mean, doesn't the whole copying thing bring drama or whatever?"
Chris nodded and shrugged. "Copy as much as your heart desires."
The contestants all went over to either or Foxface's or Cristen's paper, depending on what team they were on.
"Time's up." Chris snickered.
The contestants sat down angrily, not having time to write down the answer.
Allan suddenly woke up. "What'd I miss?"
Jennette bit her lip nervously.
Chris picked up the tests. "Mm-kay. Team with the highest combined score wins." He took out a calculator and looked over the tests. "That's a score of three hundred forty out of a possible six hundred for the Penguins."
The Penguins smirked at each other.
"And for the Seals..."
The Seals leaned in eagerly.
"...Three hundred points." Chris finished. "It looks like the pattern continues, and Mr. McLean's Penguins win again!"
The Penguins cheered.
The Seals looked down, and facepalmed.
The ones in the alliance were moderately sure of their safety.
Dustine cheered. "At least I'm safe tonight!"
Kortney scowled and twitched.
The Freezing Seals were shown at elimination that night.
Chris looked at them in pity. "Seals, Seals, Seals. You just can't hold up a victory streak, can you?"
The team glared at him.
Chris chuckled. "Kay, I get it. You all don't like talking about your patheticness. Getting to the part where I get to pelt you with snowballs... these first two go to Jennette and Kortney."
Jennette and Kortney grinned at each other as they were hit.
"I really hate that." Kortney grumbled.
Chris ignored his comment. "Meagan. You're safe as well."
Meagan dodged the snowball, making more movement than she had the past five chapters. She scoffed. "Didn't know I was capable of moving, did you?"
Chris had wide eyes. "On that impossible note... this next snowball goes to Cristen."
Cristen fell over from the snowball, oblivious to what was happening around her.
Dustine and Allan glanced at each other.
"Dustine. You are an overall annoying and overrated abhorrent teenage pop star."
Kortney belted out laughter.
"Allan... you're just kind of dumb." Chris continued. "The final snowball goes to...
Dustine squealed and was hit by the snowball.
Kortney dropped to his knees and shouted to the sky, "Why?!"
"...Because we all, like, voted for him?" Cristen suggested.
Meagan shrugged. "Meh, no one likes him. He'll go eventually."
Allan stood up, not harboring any negative feelings towards his teammates. "Hey, guys, that's cool. How this thing works, right? Besides... I really sucked at the challenge." He chortled.
"Yeah." A voice said. The camera panned over to show it was a short boy with spiky purple hair. "And you stole my middle name!" He punched Allan in the jaw.
Allan rubbed his jaw. "It's spelled differently..."
"...That's your excuse?!" The boy demanded. "Come here." He attempted to punch him again.
Allan shrieked and sprinted towards the plane. "Help!" He hopped into the plane, the boy in persuit.
"...That was crazy." Jennette observed.
"I know, right?" Meagan sighed. "No one even likes Sonic anymore."
Chris looked over at the plane in worry. "...Forget the outro, I'm calling the cops."
Chapter 7- Icebrawl
Chris was shown sneaking into a large building, the sign on it reading "Toys R We."
A cashier was seen at his post when Chris entered. "Hello, sir--"
"Shh!" Chris shushed. "I can't let anyone know I'm here." The cashier's eyes widened.
"Aren't you that guy from... that guy from, um..."
Chris cocked his head proudly. "Yes?"
"From The Largest Loser?" The cashier suggested.
Chris facepalmed. "Yes, I am from that show." He sighed. He went over to one section of the store. Several different objects with screens on them were hung from racks. "Oh, yes..." Chris mumbled. He picked one from the far right rack, a purple one reading, "Timagagchi." He switched it on. What appeared to be a cat with a pop-tart for a body showed up on the screen. It let out a technical-sounding meow sound. Chris grinned and hugged it tight.
Phil snickered from behind the camera. "Um, Chris..." He continued to snicker.
Chris jumped and put the toy down.
"P-phil?! You followed me to the store?!" Phil nodded. "Time to film that recap."
"...D-don't I have Sundays off?" Chris inquired.
Phil chuckled. "Like you can afford to have a day off anymore."
Chris shrugged. "I would be offended, but it's kind of true. Last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the teams competed to see just who was the smartest of all. In the end, the Penguins ended up as the winners by forty points. Jennette and Kortney's new alliance dominated at elimination, and Allan was successfully sent home. Who will be sent home this time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Keetin and Bunny were seen discussing their alliance.
"So... who should we send home next?" Bunny asked.
Keetin shrugged. "Foxface is pretty sneaky. And she must have some physical ability if she's that quick to hide."
Bunny shook her head. "Foxface can still be of use to us... what about that girl, Lily?"
Keetin shrugged again. "Lily's not a threat. She's too busy drooling over Rufus."
"That only leaves Luc." Bunny sighed. "I would feel bad voting him off."
"What about Rufus?" Keetin suggested.
Bunny blushed. "Well, I don't think voting him off would be very... good."
Keetin smirked and said in an amused tone, "Ooh... hiding anything, Bunny?"
Bunny blushed more. "Well... he's kind of cute. Not as cute as, like, a polar bear or something, but..."
"I think this is about more than cute animals." Keetin laughed. "I think you're jealous of Lily. I mean, you did just say you want her gone."
Bunny shook her head furiously. "No, no, no. Of course not. I mean, with all we have to do to save the environment, I have no time for dating. No time at all."
"Whatever you say, Bunny." Keetin clicked. "Whatever you say."
Lily was watching the two from a distance. She snarled and glared at Keetin.
Keetin noticed her and glared directly back. "Who are you, Foxface?" She called jokingly. L
ily blushed, sitting by Rufus.
Rufus hugged her tight. "Don't mind her, Lily. She's just jealous of us, and our undying love. Think about it. Who wouldn't be?"
Lily blushed more. "That makes sense. I mean, you can't walk down a street with a hot boyfriend without getting all kinds of jealous glares."
Rufus nodded. "She'll get over it by the time we get married, in a few years." "You think we'll get married?" Lily beamed. "I hope we do."
Rufus nodded. "Yawn." He said in confessional. "How much easier can this thing be? I mean, Lily's practically my puppet, until I decide to leave her behind. Y'know, just like Dustine is a puppet of Isher. Whenever I finally decide to dump her... oh, I can't wait to see the look on her face. This compeition is practically already mine." He cackled maniacally.
Luc was shown lying on his bed, reading a book titled, "Fifth Grade Education For Idiots." He squinted at the page. "Twenty-four divided by twenty-four equals..." He squinted harder. "Twenty-four! Of course!" He threw the book up in the air and cheered. "The last challenge made me think I should continue with school." He sighed in confessional. "I mean, the chances of me getting a gig are already slim. If I don't even have an elementary school education, who's going to accept me?"
Foxface was spying on him from a distance, being careful not to be spotted. She peered over at the book, and rolled her eyes at its title.
Luc sat up, suddenly. "...Is someone watching me?" He called.
Foxface's eyes widened. She dove down so that Luc couldn't see her.
Luc looked around outside the tent, finding nothing and no one.
Foxface carefully snuck away to the other team, to spy on them.
Luc shrugged. "Meh. I live on the streets. I'm used to people stopping and staring at a sixteen-year-old bum and hopefully giving him money... him meaning me."
Jennette and Kortney were seen in their tent, conversing, as always.
"I think our alliance did pretty well, partner." Jennette stated.
Kortney shrugged. "We pretty much dominated the vote yesterday. I don't see any reason to worry." Jennette beamed.
"So, we just sit back and control the game, partner?"
Kortney shook his head. "Nah, that's what Meagan does. Waits for victory to go to her."
"...What's wrong with that?" Jennette pondered. "It's too easy for ya?" Kortney shook his head again.
"No, it seems like the perfect thing to do." He laid back onto the wall.
Jennette nodded. "Um, sure, partner. Why not?" She awkwardly reclined onto the wall and got back up fifteen seconds after.
"...You don't know how to relax, do you?" Kortney sighed. "That's just un-American. And I'm from Canada."
"Well... things are differnet down in... Alabama." Jennette reasoned.
Kortney glared at her. "...You disgust me."
Meagan was shown laying on her bed, half-asleep.
Dustine slowly snuck up on her. "Hello, my darling."
Meagan jumped. "Dah! Oh, it's you... what do you want?!" Dustine made a clicking noise. He winked at the lazy girl. "I was just wondering... want to go out sometime?"
Meagan burst out laughing sadistically. "You must be kidding." Dustine raised an eyebrow. "Um... no."
Meagan looked at him blankly. "Look, Dustine. I don't like you. I don't respect you. Heck, I don't even enjoy being in the same room as you. Us being in the same room right now disgusts me."
"So..." Dustine sighed. "You don't want to go out with me?"
Meagan facepalmed. "Yeah. Because that wasn't totally made clear about five seconds ago. Seriously, beat it." "...B-but..." Dustine stammered.
"Why don't you go ask out that nice, moody girl?" Meagan suggested.
Dustine nodded. "Yay!" He ran over to Cristen.
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge.
"Okay." Chris began.
"We're seriously running low on the money we have for challenges. I mean, it's gotten to the point where it's not even funny anymore."
Dustine giggled. "Teehee."
Chris glared at him.
Dustine blushed and motioned for Chris to continue explaining.
"Anyway... the only thing we could really afford was ice shaped into balls." Chris sighed.
"Yeah." Meagan retorted sarcastically. "Like it's so cheap to hire someone to shape ice."
Chris' eyes widened. He facepalmed. "Now, if there are no more interruptions... the challenge is a classic game of dodgeball... with balls made of ice." He guffawed sadistically.
Keetin's eyes widened. "So... we're going to have giant balls of ice flying at us?"
Rufus folded his arms. "This cannot be safe."
"This is Total Drama." Chris scoffed. "We don't do 'safe.'"
He led them to a court, which was simply a random spot in the snow with lines etched into them, dividing each teams side across the middle.
"Um, don't they have one more person than us?" Kortney realized.
"Yeah." Cristen agreed. "That is, like, so unfair."
Chris grunted angrily. "Fine..." He threw a ball of ice at Luc's head, making him fall onto the ice unconsious.
"Wouldn't it have just made more sense to have us sit someone out?" Lily demanded with wide eyes.
Chris shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not." He laid five balls of ice onto the boundary line between the two teams. "We play until one team has two wins. And... begin!"
Foxface immediately hid behind Rufus, working out her strategy.
Jennette picked up a ball and hurled it at Bunny.
Bunny fell onto the ice with a thud and groaned. "Ow... where'd you get that kind of arm?"
"Livin' on the farm does something to you." Jennette boasted.
Rufus smirked and threw a ball at Cristen.
Cristen weakly fell over, putting forth no effort to dodge or catch."Ow.. that, like, kind of hurt."
Rufus folded his arms proudly. "Of course it did." Lily picked up a ball and chucked it at Dustine.
Dustine fell on the floor and began to wail.
Jennette gasped and picked up a ball.
She threw it at Lily, but it hit Keetin instead.
Keetin fell onto the floor and moaned.
Jennette threw a ball at Rufus.
Rufus smirked and caught the ball with ease. "Try again, Betty Sue."
Jennette looked down and walked off the "court."
"I'm still in?" Meagan sighed. "Shocker... I wasn't being sarcastic." She threw a ball at Lily.
Lily failed to dodge and fell onto the ice with a thud.
Rufus gasped and threw the ball back at her, determined to avenge his ditzy girlfriend.
Meagan was hit with the ball, leaving Kortney as the only one for his team in the round.
Rufus threw a different ball at him.
Kortney caught it without much effort. "You need more than brute strength for this, lunchbox."
Rufus folded his arms and walked away.
Foxface came out from hiding.
Kortney gasped, obviously not noticing her before. He chucked a ball at her.
Foxface caught it swiftly.
The Penguins cheered.
"The Penguins win the first round." Chris confirmed. "Get ready for round two."
The contestants went back to the court and prepared for another round.
Chris once again put the five balls into their place. “And… begin!” He called.
The five Seals immediately targeted Foxface.
They each picked up a ball and threw them at her simultaneously.
Foxface was hit by the ice and fell to the ground in sharp pain.
She moaned, making the first sound all season.
“Woah…” Keetin sighed. “Harsh, much?”
Lily picked up a ball and flung it at Kortney.
Kortney leaped out of the ball’s path and sighed in relief.
Rufus smirked and threw a ball at the same person.
Kortney was hit this time around, and fell onto the ice with a thud.
Jennette shrugged and picked up a ball.
“Oh, so I don’t get a huge avenging scene?” Kortney complained.
Jennette shrugged and threw her ball at Rufus.
Rufus was hit in the groin by the ball. He moaned in agony.
Jennette smirked and cackled. “Looks like I got ya, partner!”
Lily gasped and picked up the ball that had hit her boyfriend. She aimed at Jennette and fired, but it hit Cristen instead.
Cristen groaned and fell over effortlessly.
Dustine picked up a ball and rolled it over to Bunny.
Bunny obviously didn’t expect the low ball and was knocked off her feet.
Dustine giggled. “Woohoo!”
Keetin picked the ball that had hit her alliance member and aimed at Dustine.
Jennette gasped and pushed Dustine out of the way.
Dustine scoffed and glared at her. “You are not allowed to touch me, lowly fan.”
Jennette nodded quickly. “Of course, your awesomeness. Of course.”
Keetin winked and hurled a ball at Dustine and Jennette.
Meagan stepped in front of them and caught the ball. She sighed disapprovingly at them. “Pay attention, will you?”
Keetin facepalmed and walked away.
Jennette nodded and flung a ball at an unsuspecting Lily.
Lily, obviously not paying attention, was hit and fell to the floor.
Rufus looked around and realized he was the only one left for his team and outnumbered. He blindly threw a ball to the other side.
Jennette caught the ball and smirked. “Looks like you need some more trainin’, partner.”
Rufus folded his arms and shook his head.
“The Seals annihilate in round two!” Chris announced.
The Seals cheered.
“Round three!” Chris continued. “Get ready!”
The teens got into place as Chris reverted the balls to the center line.
Immediately, Rufus picked up a ball and threw it towards Dustine.
Dustine was hit and fell to the ground hard, bruised. “Why...?”
“Because you’re a little, talentless brat…” Kortney grumbled.
Jennette picked up a ball and threw back over at Rufus.
Rufus ducked, dodging the ball.
Keetin threw a ball at Kortney.
Kortney caught it just before it smacked him in the face. “That was a close one…”
Keetin sighed deeply and turned to her teammates. “Good luck, guys.”
Lily reached for a ball, aimed it at Cristen, and hit the moody, thin girl right in the stomach.
Cristen clutched the area where she was hit and fell over.
Jennette threw the ball that had hit Cristen at Bunny.
Bunny suddenly became alert and caught it.
Jennette’s eyes widened, obviously surprised. She walked away from the “court.”
Rufus hurled a ball at Kortney.
Kortney jumped in order to get out of its path, effectively dodging the ice ball.
Meagan smirked and threw a ball at Bunny.
Bunny was hit on the leg and fell over in pain.
Kortney shook his head and nailed Lily in the chest with a ball.
Lily moaned and fell on the ground.
“…I feel weird hitting a girl with ice…” Kortney sighed. “…Never thought I’d say that.”
Rufus squinted and sent a ball at Kortney.
Kortney dodged the ball.
Meagan picked up a ball, and located Foxface, hiding behind Rufus in order to remain unseen. She threw the ball at her.
Foxface was hit in the arm and fell over, obviously not prepared.
Rufus noticed that he was outnumbered, two to one, being the last one for his team. He grunted and picked up two balls.
Kortney flung a ball at him; determined to help his team win.
Rufus dodged the ball with ease and threw a ball back at the comedian.
Kortney was hit in the stomach and fell over.
Meagan scoffed in disappointment. She picked up the ball that had hit her teammate and fired it at the womanizer.
Rufus simply caught Meagan’s ball. “I would never hit a girl. But I would beat her, to serve my team.”
Meagan folded her arms and rolled her eyes. “Looks like another easy vote in on the way.”
Chris nodded. “The Penguins win!”
Said team cheered and surrounded Rufus.
“As for the Freezing Seals…” Chris called. “You guys are going to go from five to four tonight. Good luck.” He chortled sadistically.
The team looked over each other, not being worried about being eliminated.
Luc woke up, suddenly. “…What’d I miss?”
“Pain.” Bunny groaned. “Lots and lots of pain.”
“You know, I actually think he was lucky to miss the challenge.” Keetin added.
The other members of Mr. McLean’s Penguins nodded.
The Freezing Seals were shown at elimination the following evening.
They were all simply lying around bored, already knowing who was going home.
Meagan was filing her nails. “Can we get this over with?” She sighed. “It’s already obvious who’s going.”
Even Chris looked uninterested. He sighed deeply and mumbled, “Let’s see now… quite an exciting and suspenseful vote, eh? These three snowballs go to Jennette, Kortney, and Meagan. What a shocker.”
The three called simply nodded as they were hit by the snowballs.
“Give Dustine ‘is safety already, partner!” Jennette demanded.
Kortney facepalmed. “Yes. Get it over with. Please.”
Dustine was sitting asleep, obviously almost literally bored to death.
Cristen was actually nervous about the vote, of course.
Chris rolled his eyes. “The last snowball goes to…”
Chris checked his watch to see how long he had to make the dramatic pause.
Dustine was hit by the snowball and woke with a start.
Cristen shrugged and stood up. “Well, like… I guess this is how this game, like, works, I guess. Like, bye, guys.” She trudged toward the plane and boarded, luggage in hand.
“The author really needs to make more surprising eliminations.” Kortney whispered to Jennette.
Jennette nodded in agreement.
“What other hopefully-more-exciting elimination will take place next?” Chris closed. “Find out next time on Total… Drama… Antarctica!”
Chapter 8- A Sky Full Of Lighters
Chris was seen sitting on a reclining chair, angrily talking into his cell phone. "What do you mean, you don't deliver?!" He listened to the other person for a minute. "Oh, so you do deliver." He listened again. "What do you mean, you can't deliver to Antarctica?" Again, he listened to the other person. "Fine then!" He hung up and slammed his phone on the icy floor. He stared at the camera.
"Um... Chris?" Phil asked from behind the camera.
"Yes, Phil?" Chris sighed, annoyed.
"Why were you trying to get pizza delivered from halfway across the world?" The cameraman chuckled.
Chris blushed. "Because I thought there were still a few good businesses out there that care about their customers."
Phil chortled. "That's a good one, Chris. That's a good one."
Chris sighed and rolled his eyes. "Well, might as well do some work while I wait for that pizza. Last time on Total Drama Antarctica," He began. "The teams went through a painful challenge: dodgeball with balls made of ice. After a grueling three rounds, Mr. McLean's Penguins came out on top and the alliance of Jennette, Kortney, Dustine, and Meagan successfully sent Cristen packing. What will happen this time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
"So..." Keetin stated. "I think our team may continue our win streak today."
Bunny nodded contently. "We might not even have to worry about a vote... y'know, until the merge."
Keetin giggled and nodded. "Right. Though, if we do have to vote someone off... who?"
Bunny shrugged. "Foxface is kind of a threat, but I don't want to betray her."
"Same." Keetin agreed. "What about Lily?"
Bunny wiped a bead of sweat from her forehead. "Well, I would love to, but..." Her voice trailed off, looking for a reason.
Keetin smirked. "Ooh... why are you sweating, nervous?" She chuckled.
"N-no..." Bunny stammered. "Because of the... of t-the heat."
"It's minus twenty-six degrees." Keetin informed. "How can you be sweating because of the heat?"
"Well, um..." Bunny sighed. "As cold as it, it was colder before global warming."
"So you're used to minus twenty-nine degrees but not minus twenty-six degrees?" Keetin guffawed.
Bunny blushed. "Well, anyway, since Rufus is a huge help to our team, there's only one option left." She looked over at Luc."
Keetin nodded in response. "I hate to do it, but it's nessessary."
The poverty-ridden guitarist himself was shown inside the tent, actually relaxing for once. He sighed deeply. "I have to keep trying. It's not like the million-dollar prize is just going to fall out of the sky." He reclined onto the wall, feeling a bump on his back. "What the...?" He looked back to see a large chocolate muffin hanging from a string. He beamed and grabbed at it.
The muffin seemed to jump off the bed.
Luc raised an eyebrow. He jumped down onto the ground and attempted to reach it again, but it once again scooted away from him. Luc facepalmed and chased after it.
The chocolate treat simply seemed to run away, getting faster as it sped away from Luc.
Luc grunted and continued to run after it with all his might. "Come here, strange pastry..."
The muffin made it back to its source: Foxface.
Foxface pulled the cord the muffin was tied onto, succeeding in pulling the trick she had planned on Luc.
Luc's mouth was now watering. "W-what can I do to earn that?"
Foxface smirked and pointed over to Bunny. She pointed back at herself, then to Luc.
"...You want us to form an alliance with her?" Luc guessed.
Foxface shook her head. She pointed to herself and Luc, pointed at Keetin, and then made an X with her fingers.
"Y-you want us to vote her off?" Luc stuttered.
Foxface folded her arms and nodded.
"Can I have the muffin now?" Luc begged.
Foxface nodded again and handed him the muffin.
Luc snatched the muffin away and gobbled it up greedily, followed by an obnoxious burp. He sighed in pleasure.
Foxface rolled her eyes and walked away, nonchallantly.
Rufus was seen lying on his bed, snoozing away.
Lily suddenly popped up behind him and yelled into his face. "Hi!"
Rufus jumped up, suddenly awake. "Ah, Lily!" He took a deep breath. "...What are you doing?"
"I'm your biggest fan!" Lily explained. "I'll follow you until you love me!"
"...I already love you." Rufus sighed. "Anyway, why are you waking me up at seven in the morning?"
Lily giggled. "It's not that early, silly! It's almost noon!"
"Noon...?" Rufus thought aloud. "Why do I feel like I got no sleep last night?"
"Remember..." Lily cooned dreamily.
A scene from the previous night was shown. Lily and Rufus were outside talking to each other, Rufus half-asleep.
"Oh, yeah..." Rufus sighed angrily. "I remember now."
Lily chortled. "Want to do that again, tonight?"
"What in the world?" Rufus complained in confessional. "She won't leave me alone... ever. I'm on the verge of snapping. Too bad my strategy prevents me from getting rid of her this early. Seriously, I've seen some clingy girls, but Lily really takes the cake. I've never dated a..." He shuddered. "Stalker before."
Jennette and Kortney were depressedly conversing with each other.
"It looks like our 'alliance' is the only alliance left on the team." Kortney sighed.
"Yep, partner." Jennette agreed. "What happens if we have to go to elimination again?"
"Then we'll have to count our votes more precisely." Kortney suggested. "Just promise me we won't vote each other off."
Jennette nodded. "Of course I would never vote you out... though, if Dustine agrees to ally with me..." She trailed off, lost in contemplation.
"Looks like I'm the only guy left on the team." Kortney realized.
"What about Dustine?" Jennette reminded.
"..." Kortney stared at her, saying nothing.
"..." Jennette copied.
"...PJ style for the win." Kortney chortled.
"Who's PJ?" Jennette mumbled to herself.
Dustine was shown playing around on his myPhone. He tapped its screen, and one of his songs began to play. He cheered and began to fist pump to the beat of the song.
Meagan groaned and glared over at him. "Dustine. What is your deal?"
"Nothing." Dustine replied. "I just like bathing in my success."
"Turn it off." Meagan threatened. "Or else."
"Or else what?" Dustine mocked. "You'll give me something worse than when I collabed with Chris Black?"
"Or else..." Meagan smirked. "I'll tweet these pictures to your fangirls." She held up her own myPhone, which contained several suspicious-looking pictures of Dustine.
Dustine's eyes widened. "W-where'd you get those?" He quivered.
"From a little friend of mine." Meagan pointed to her contacts list, where a familiar-looking blonde girl was at the top. "She had these pictures on her vlog, anyway."
Dustine began to sweat out of nervousness. He rapidly tapped his myPhone, attempting to turn his song off.
Meagan chuckled when Dustine failed to shut it off. She clicked a button on hers. "Oops. Too late."
Dustine's phone rang just as he turned the song off. Many messages from upset fangirls came up on his screen. He began to weep.
Meagan shook her head. "How the great fall."
The contestants met Chris outside for the challenge.
Chris was lying on a reclining chair, asleep, the cell phone from earlier in his hand.
Meagan facepalmed. "Real professional, Chris." She mumbled.
Keetin marched up to Chris and gave him a hard slap in the face.
Chris woke with a start. He looked around panickedly. "...Was that to wake me up?"
Keetin looked at him suspiciously. "...Nah, I just felt like slapping you."
The others laughed at his misfortune.
Chris glared at them. "Jeez. Everyone's annoying me today. First the pizza place says they don't deliver to Antarctica, now this."
"You actually thought the would deliver here?" Rufus scoffed.
Chris folded his arms. "Don't sass me, boy."
Rufus rolled his eyes.
"Anyway... since the pizza never got here, I decided today's challenge should be a cooking one." Chris explained.
"Cooking." Kortney scoffed. "With no oven or stove or even a microwave?"
"Hello?! The challenge wouldn't be very challenging otherwise." Chris continued. "Anyway... you must find a way to cook the recipe without any modern appliances." He gave recipes to Jennette and Rufus. "Begin!"
The teams walked away from each other, trying to figure out how to cook without a stove.
Luc was shown pitching a plan to his teammates. "Okay, so we just hold the meat up to the sun..."
"...And?" Lily sighed.
Luc shrugged. "This is where one of you guys is supposed to pitch in."
Rufus facepalmed. "This recipe is the easiest thing known to man." He held up a package of buns and a hamburger patty Chris had given him. "All we have to do is cook the meat."
"We could somehow start a fire like Luc said." Keetin suggested. "Using the sun."
Lily held her hand up.
Rufus facepalmed. "Yes, Lily?"
"Maybe we could start a fire by rubbing two piece of ice together. Y'know, like on TV." Lily suggested.
Rufus forced a smile. "That's with sticks, Lily."
"Oh..." Lily mumbled, dismayed.
Bunny folded her arms. "This challenge is inhumane. That poor cow died just for some viewers' entertainment."
Keetin began to sweat nervously. "Y'know, Bunny, I think it would be a lot better if you at least tried."
Bunny looked to the side indifferently. "Nope. There's no way I'm going to help you cook meat."
Rufus glared at her. "Good luck at the elimination, Bunny. Good luck."
Keetin sighed deeply.
The other team was shown discussing how to win.
"I don't get how Chris expects to finish this anytime soon." Meagan complained. "It would be easier to wait a few million years for climate change to make it hot here."
Kortney shrugged. "I would disagree, but that totally sounds like something I would say."
Jennette chuckled. "I remeber back when Pa was too cheap to buy us an oven. We used to cook food with a fire we used to start outside."
"How do you expect to start a fire here?" Kortney sighed. "We could never."
"Never say nev--" Dustine began.
"I know, Dustine." Kortney grumbled. "I know what not to say."
Dustine looked down, dismayed. "So... am I supposed to, like, contribute or something?"
Meagan shook her head. "This is going to take a long' while."
"Look on the bright side." Kortney mumbled. "The other team must be failing too."
The Penguins had then utterly given up on the challenge and were trying to get their way at elimination that night.
Lily was talking to Keetin.
"So, sure you can convince Rufus to vote with Bunny and I tonight?" Keetin asked.
Lily nodded. "Rufus and I are so in-sync. We would never disagree. I'll convince him."
"Rufus seems to agree with Lily 24/7." Keetin stated in confessional. "I thought it was a good bet."
Keetin nodded, now out of confessional. "Thanks a bunch, Lily." She walked away.
Bunny looked over at Lily doubtfully.
Lily gave her a reassuring wink.
The Seals were discussing how to claim victory.
"This is so pathetic." Kortney mumbled. "Before this, I didn't like fire. Now all I want to see is a sky full of lighters."
Dustine clapped giddily. "I have my cover of that song on my myPhone." He turned on the song.
Meagan facepalmed. "That's real helpful."
Jennette sighed in admiration. "What beautiful music..."
"So good the glass on the myPhone is breaking." Kortney mumbled.
Meagan chuckled. "The funniest part is that you're not kidding."
The glass on the device slowly cracked apart until the entire thing cut open and began to spark.
Dustine gasped and dropped it onto the ground. "B-but... how?!"
Kortney and Meagan began to laugh their heads off.
Jennette stared at the breaking device in agony and began to weep almost as much as Dustine.
The myPhone eventually ceased sparking and burst into flames.
Dustine yelled at the sky, "Why?! Why must I have such a high voice?"
"You'll find out when you're older." Kortney joked.
"I'm the same age as you!" Dustine pointed out.
"Look on the bright side." Meagan advised. "We just won the challenge." She took out the hamburger patty and threw it into the fire to cook.
Chris and the Freezing Seals were shown waltzing up to the opposing team.
Chris was munching on a hamburger. "Sorry, losers. The Seals won this challenge..." He looked around at them, noting they weren't even trying to win anymore. "...Looks like you already figured that out." He smirked.
Bunny glared at the other team. "You all sicken me."
Rufus looked over at Bunny and winked at her.
Bunny looked back at him halfheartedly.
"...Can we stop this winking and glaring and get them to elimination?" Meagan demanded.
The losing team was seen that night, waiting for the announcement of which one of them was going.
"Wow... it feels like forever since we've been here." Lily sighed in awe.
"It's been like three days." Keetin informed with a raised eyebrow.
"Penguins." Chris began. "Welcome back to the dreaded elimination ceremony. One of you has received the majority of the votes and will be exiled from the game, never to return."
"It's not like we don't know how it works." Rufus grumbled.
Chris ignored him. "These first two snowballs go to Lily and Rufus."
Rufus groaned at his clingy lover being safe, but then put on a cheerful expression for her sake. "Yay."
"Foxface." Chris called. "And Keetin. You two gals are also safe."
Foxface smirked, surving another day in the compeition.
Keetin looked over doubtfully at Bunny.
Bunny sighed deeply.
Luc's eyes widened as he began to sweat nervously.
"Bunny. Luc." Chris scolded. "The final snowball goes to...
Luc sighed in heavy relief as he was hit.
Bunny stood up, not believing what had just happened. "B-but... b-but..."
Rufus smirked at her, obviously having voted for her.
Lily shrugged at her. "Couldn't convince him... but he convinced me."
Bunny angrily stormed over to the plane and boarded without another word.
Keetin looked after her in depair. "Bunny!"
Her friend looked back at her with a poker face before leaving.
Chris turned to the camera. "Looks like that elimination was more dramatic." Chris closed. "Tune in next time for Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 9- The Chapter That Had Such A Low Budget It Couldn't Afford A Title
Chris was looking through a safe, panning and panning for anything he could find. His eyes widened. "Gotta be some money, gotta be some money somewhere..." He took a piggy bank from a shelf and smashed it apart with his knee. Several coins spilled out of it. "Sixty-seven, sixty-eight, sixty-nine..." He counted. "Sixty-nine cents?! Only sixty-nine?!" He threw the coins onto the ground in deperation. He then picked them up after about two seconds. "On second thought, it's better than nothing." He glared at a penny with a face drawn onto it. "Don't look at me like that, Coiny!"
"..." Phil said behind the camera.
"Stop being PJ, Phil!" Chris scolded.
"Chris, out of everything I've ever seen you do..." Phil sighed. "This is by far the most deluted and desperate."
Chris glared back at him. "For your information, Phil, the network's not putting any more money into the budget until the merge. So, basically, we have a budget of sixty-nine cents for this episode."
"...Meaning...?" Phil inquired.
"Meaning that if you don't scrape something together and put on a good show, you're not getting paid." Chris informed.
Phil's eyes widened. He dropped the camera on the floor and kneeled down to sift between the sofa cushions.
A black-and-white picture of Chris was shown. A low-quality recording began to play. "Hello. If you are listening to this, then Total Drama Antarctica does not meet the financial requirements to record a proper introduction. Without further ado, we present the intro. Last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the teens competed in a battle of wits, to cook with no modern household appliances. The Seals ultimately won after the Penguins forfeited, and Bunny was eliminated after a four-to-two vote, after being double-crossed by Lily and Rufus. How will Keetin cope with the departure of her friend? How will Lily and Rufus deal with the reactions of their teammates? Find out right now on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Keetin was shown staring at the ground. She looked up at the sky afterwards, obviously depressed.
Lily went up to her. "Hey, Keetin... sorry about yesterday."
Keetin shrugged. "It's not your fault. I know you're too much of an idiotic pushover to convince Rufus of anything."
Lily looked hurt. "Keetin... what do you mean?"
Keetin rolled her eyes. "You know very well what I mean, Lily."
Lily put her hands on her head and went back over to Rufus.
"It's not like she won't admit who she is." Keetin mumbled to herself. "And I know she realizes that all the readers loathe her. There's no way in the world she'll win. She's only there to make Rufus look evil."
Rufus looked over at her and shrugged. "It's pretty true."
Keetin checked her watch. "Almost time for the comic relief characters to take over the screen." She stood up. "In the meantime, I should probably try to make some new allies."
Lily and Rufus were shown sitting together.
"Rufus." Lily consulted. "Are you sure we should've betrayed Keetin last night and gotten rid of Bunny?"
Rufus shrugged. "What's done is done. Whether or not Bunny still has a chance of winning is no longer our concern. Who cares anymore?"
"Bunny cares..." Lily muttered. "She's someone."
"Look, Lily." Rufus sighed. "Would you rather have her go or one of us go?"
"..." Lily stared at her boyfriend.
"Stop being PJ and answer already." Rufus commanded.
"I guess I would rather have her go." Lily admitted. "But I still feel bad."
"Don't worry." Rufus advised. "You'll grow out of that." He looked to the side sadistically.
Lily nodded and looked to the side awkwardly, attempting to imitate Rufus' facial expression.
"This is getting easier and easier." Rufus bragged in confessional. "Lily seems to be getting stupider and stupider by the minute. She's just so innocent... Oh, I can't wait to see her face when I decide to throw her away and find someone new to trick and use to win." He smirked at the camera.
Luc was shown clipping his fingernails. He sighed deeply. "I'm pretty sure the only reason I didn't go home last time was because everyone pities me." He thought alound to himself and shrugged. "That's probably my best chance to win. I shouldn't bash it."
Foxface looked over at him. "..."
Luc's eyes widened. "OMG. I just noticed you're just like PJ."
Foxface rolled her eyes and held up a picture of PJ. She pointed to her and said, "Why does she get so many references?" She immediately dropped the picture and clutched her throat, obviously surprised at what had just happened.
Luc was even startled. "I-I didn't even know you were able to talk..."
Foxface nodded furiously. She continued to feel her throat, looking for any sort of change. She then fel her forehead for signs of fever. She ran outside the tent.
Luc looked after her. He shrugged it off. "Now after that deluded dream, it's time to get back to working at my dream to meet Kristina Grammie and Meg Nicky." He began to again pick at his guitar.
The picture of PJ blew closer to him and he picked it up. "Why does she even have this?"
Foxface was shown peering into the opposing team's tent.
Foxface rolled her eyes.
Meagan looked directly over at Foxface. "What do you want?"
Foxface, startled, scurried away from that tent.
Meagan rolled her eyes. "Seriously. I think that was the first interaction from people on different teams since, like, the first chapter. That's kind of pathetic."
She looked over at her phone's screen. "Born Insane, Madonna, I Kissed A Girl For Attention, Teenage Nightmare..." She chuckled. "I love that song. So, um... stalling time as a filler..."
Foxface again peered into the tent when she was sure Meagan wasn't looking. She smirked and took notes.
Meagan continued to play idiotic songs on her myPhone. She looked up at Foxface. "How many times do I have to get rid of you?"
Foxface looked down at the ground and trudged away discouragedly.
"She looked like Jena with that notepad..." Meagan mumbled. "Not that I don't look like Jena."
"So... what if we lose?" Jennette asked.
Kortney shrugged. "I don't have all the answers. But just know if we do lose, I'm voting Dustine."
"Leave Dustine alone, partner!" Jennette complained. "He already has to deal with that viral video of that parody of his song."
"Oh, I made that thing." Kortney chuckled. "It got like one hundred million views."
Jennette stood up, disgusted. "You sicken me." She ran over to Dustine for comfort.
Dustine was practicing his singing, using his extremely high voice. "I'm not a girly, girly, girly, oh..."
Jennette sat down next to him. "Hey there, partner. How ya doin'?"
Dustine looked over at her. "Oh, hello, unworthy fan. How are you today?" He was obviously hiding negative feelings behind this cheerful expression. "Nothing bad's happening. I'm totally not getting Tweeter updates from emotionally scarred girls who saw those vile pictures Meagan and her friend posted."
Jennette's eyes widened. "Um... what pictures?"
Dustine's eyes darted to her. "Losing fans by the second. Just yesterday, I lost over three hundred thousand..." He began to rock back and forth.
Jennette looked down. "It's happening. The haters have done it, partner." She began to sob onto Dustine's shoulder.
Dustine sobbed in return.
Kortney rolled his eyes. "If only that were true."
The teens met Chris outside for the challenge.
"Welcome, helpless teenagers to today's challenge." Chris greeted. "We were going to whip out a challenge involving maniacial penguins, but we ran out of the budget for that."
"So... you're saying we're not going to have a challenge today?" Luc beamed hopefully.
"Of course I don't mean that." Chris giggled. "But we have a budget of sixty-nine cents."
"Teehee." Dustine chortled. "Sixty-nine."
Meagan rolled her eyes.
"So, basically, the challenge is to pick a number between one and ten." Chris sighed. "Closest team wins. Seals, you can go first."
"...We pick five?" Kortney suggested.
Meagan shrugged. "Why not?"
"Penguins?" Chris continued.
"We choose seven." Rufus told.
"Shouldn't we have a say in it, meathead?" Keetin retorted.
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Luc moaned.
Rufus rolled his eyes. "Have fun with being democratic, Keetin."
"Five and seven..." Chris mumbled. "Well, you see, the number was six, so... you guys kind of tied."
The contestants groaned.
"Okay, so guess again..." Chris sighed. "Seals--"
Suddenly, a blue helicopter dropped down from the sky, a burly, muscular man stepping out wearing a police uniform. "I believe the individual known as Dustine Believer is in the area?"
Kortney, Meagan, Luc, Rufus, and Foxface immediately shoved Dustine in front of the police officer.
"Angry authority figure demanding Dustine? I like where this is going." Kortney chuckled.
Jennette began to get nervous, thinking the same thing as Kortney.
"This individual is under arrest." The policeman pulled out a notepad. "For harboring and consuming illegal drugs that are said to 'reverse puberty.'"
Kortney and Meagan began to laugh heartily.
Jennette began to hyperventilate. "This... this isn't possible. This doesn't make sense, partner. I-I th-this isn't possible."
"But, seriously." Keetin smirked. "This is a joke, right?"
"Negative." The policeman responded. "A message containing several proof pictures of this crime was sent out on Tweeter yesterday. We were able to trace it back to this location."
The contestants and Chris all looked at Meagan.
"Um..." Chris stuttered. "What's going to happen to him?"
"Easy." The policeman sighed. "He's going to live out his days in a cold and lonely jail cell."
Meagan was obviously estatic. "Wow. I never thought I would be the one to bring down Believer. I feel so accomplished." She chuckled.
Kortney beamed. "This. Is. The happiest day of my life."
"Finally." Rufus sighed in awe. "He won't direct attention away from those girls that are sopposed to like me."
Dustine, who had been silent this whole time, finally spoke. "Fine then." He said in a surprisingly low voice. "You caught me. I never thought any of these idiots would figure it out. I'm like a year older than all of you and you never wondered why I have such a high voice?"
Jennette feel over, unconsious from shock.
A familiar-looking female police officer came in and helped the other one carry Dustine out of the area and into the helicopter.
"Well, um..." Chris sighed. "That's our elimination for the day."
The contestants cheered.
"Well, you saw it here, first." Chris closed. "The era of Dustine Believer is finally over. Tune in to se what other world-changing things happen on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Dustine was shown being dragged in chains by the police officers to his jail cell back in Canada. He as plopped down in a cell occupied by a red-haired girl, a brown-haired girl, and a white-haired girl wearing safety tape with glasses made of cigarettes.
The redhead was rocking back and forth. "Lindsay Lojan is my name. I was so famous..."
The brown-haired girl had a country accent even thicker than Jennette's. "Sweet nibblets, y'all. I ain't supposed to be in here."
The other girl stood up and began talking on a telephone. "Hello, hello, baby, you called, I can't hear a thing..."
Dustine's eyes widened. "Noooooo..." He moaned.
Chapter 10- The Game of Life... Or Death
Chris was shown in his bed, holding a laptop and browsing the internet. He tapped at a few keys and squinted at the screen. He squealed. "I finally found it. Here it is." He clicked the screen. The camera shifted to show that the computer was playing a ten-second video of Chris getting his head cut clean off by a masked man. The title read, "Super Bloody Killer Movie 2: First Death." Chris began to cry and replayed the video over and over. "I remember that movie. I got paid so much... and my hair looked so good!" He began to weep again. He looked at it again.
Phil was behind the camera, yet again. "Chris. Are you reminising over your 'glory days' again?"
Chris jumped in shock and panted towards the camera. "...D-do we have any other cameramen?! Why do I always get stuck with you for the intro?"
"Cause." Phil explained. "The author likes me. He likes me so much he decided to bring me back after killing me off."
"That doesn't even make sense." Chris mumbled. He cleared his throat. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica, the teams were faced with an extremely low budget challenge, which just happened to end in a tie. Just before we could begin the tiebreaker, a group of scary-looking cops came in and arrested Dustine for doing anti-puberty drugs... it's not like we all didn't know that. What other illegal things will happen here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Keetin was shown sitting outside, nonchallantly filing her nails. "This is nice." She sighed to herself. "The merge could come any day now and I don't have any real allies. I'm going to have try to get the help of the other team, once we merge. They're practically my only hope, at this point."
Lily went over to her, as she did the previous day. "Hey, Keetin..."
Keetin glared at her. "What do you want, bi--"
"Before you start yelling at me while breaking the fourth wall..." Lily inturrupted. "I just wanted to say that maybe we could help each other at the merge. I mean, come on, even I know it's coming up and I was wondering--"
"Nah." Keetin cut off. "I don't really want to."
Lily raised an eyebrow. "But... you were just creepily talking to yourself about how desperate and poor you are in the game and--"
Keetin chuckled. "Okay, I'm desperate. But not that desperate. I mean, come on, who in the right mind would ally with... you?"
Lily gasped. "Fine, then. I don't need you, anyway. I'm completely fine being an independent person."
"Independent meaning relying on Rufus, the whole time?" Keetin retorted.
Lily folded her arms and walked away from the rude artist.
Luc was shown depressedly strumming at his guitar. "Good-bye, Dustine..." He sang. "Have fun living out your days in a jail cell..." He wrote something down on a sheet of paper, assumably what he had just sang.
Foxface was sitting on the ground, silently observing Luc.
Luc looked over at her. "Anything you want? Anything you want from me... at all?"
Foxface shook her head.
"This is pathetic." Luc sighed. "I might as well be talking to myself, when I talk to you. You never have anything at all to say, you just stare and stare and stare."
"..." Foxface said.
"PJ." Luc called. "PJ moment, right there."
"..." Foxface responded.
Luc shrugged and went back to writing song lyrics. "We're gonna have fun with this one..."
"That's what she said..." Foxface mumbled.
Lily and Rufus were shown together.
"Rufus." Lily sighed. "Tell me the truth. Am I... unintelligent?"
Rufus stared at her for a minute before bursting out with laughter.
Lily frowned. "What's that supposed to mean?"
Rufus' eyes widened. "Oh... you see, I was laughing because... it was so ridiculous. You're obviously really very smart and... stuff."
"...So, I am intelligent?" Lily guessed.
Rufus rolled his eyes and nodded.
Lily hugged her supposed boyfriend. "So... we have two votes out of eight... that's majority, right?"
Rufus forced a smile. "Totally. That's totally majority, Lily. You're so... mathematical."
Lily nodded and clapped giddily.
"About as smart as a pile of paper clips." Rufus grumbled in confessional. "Seriously, I have to something other than manipulate Lily if I want to win this thing.
The three remaining members of the Freezing Seals were discussing, all together.
"So..." Meagan sighed. "Then there were three. If we were in a situation where we all against each other, you guys would team up on me, right?"
Kortney shook his head. "No, no, of course not... yeah, pretty much."
Meagan rolled her eyes. "Can we just agree to vote together in the merge? We may the minority right now, but I bet we can get a couple of those idiots from the other team to help us."
"Lily and Rufus come as a package deal, partner." Jennette pointed out. "Maybe we could get them to help us."
"Lily's an idiot." Kortney informed. "And Rufus is a jerk."
"Good point, partner." Jennette agreed. "Who else is there?"
"There's that poor dude and that artist girl..." Meagan mumbled. "And that one creepy chick."
"You mean Luc, Keetin, and Foxface?" Kortney chuckled. "I'd rather ally with Luc or Foxface. They seem more likely to win this thing than Keetin."
Jennette nodded in agreement. "Yeah, partners. We should try to ally with them, all quick-like."
"...Is there any way you can stop yourself from saying 'partner?'" Meagan inquired. "Or is it some sort of reflex?"
Kortney snickered at this.
The teens met Chris outside for the challenge.
"Welcome to another fabulous day on Total Drama Antarctica." Chris welcomed.
"I don't get what's so fabulous about it..." Meagan muttered.
"Now, time for an announcement that could make your game..." Chris smirked. "Or ruin it. The teams no longer exist. That's right, it's every man/woman/whatever Luc is for themselves. After this challenge, all the boys will move into the Penguins' tent and all the girls will moves into the Seals' tent."
"Hey!" Luc protested.
"Sorry. That joke was meant for Dustine." Chris chuckled. "But since he's no longer here, we had to improvise."
Meagan smirked. "Finally, I don't have to worry about being voted out by the lovebirds on my team."
Jennette and Kortney blushed.
"Meh." Kortney shrugged. "It's at least half-true. She totally would've gone if we had went to elimination one more time."
Keetin let out a sigh of relief. "I was getting tired of being on that stupid team."
Her former teammates all glared at her.
"Now, time for your first challenge as individuals." Chris continued. He held up a ball made of ice.
The contestants groaned.
"It's that demon ball again." Rufus grumbled.
Chris nodded. "Remember this friendly little thing? I'm going to throw one of these into the air. Whoever catches it gets to pick someone else to take out of the challenge. Then we'll repeat that. Last person standing wins the challenge." He threw the ball towards the contestants. "And go!"
Keetin quickly caught the ball. She pointed to Lily. "Lily, get the flip out of here." She looked at the camera. "Stupid PG rating."
Lily walked away from the challenge area, eyes on the ground.
"There's our first round done." Chris chuckled. He threw another ball in the air.
Rufus and Kortney both dove for the ball.
Kortney smirked and smacked Rufus' hand away.
Rufus still was able to snatch the ball. He cheered. "Kortney. Get out."
Kortney glared at the cocky womanizer and gave an encouraging glance back to Jennette.
Chris threw another ball at the teens.
The contestants all rushed for the ball.
Luc was able to slip between the stampede and barely catch the ball.
"How did we all not notice him?" Meagan mumbled.
Luc shrugged and pointed at Foxface. "I guess... creeper girl over there."
Foxface rolled her eyes and exited the playing field.
Chris threw a fourth ball in the air. "Come on, kids!"
Rufus caught the ball with ease, the others not even getting a chance to run over to it. Rufus glared at Keetin and pointed towards the sidelines.
Keetin flipped the bird in Rufus' face and went over to the others who had lost the challenge.
Kortney looked over at her. "Hey, Keetin... can I ask you a favor for tonight?"
"...That's what she said?" Keetin sighed with a raised eyebrow.
Chris threw another ice-ball at the four remaining players.
Suddenly, Luc leaped up and caught the ball, the other contestants not seeing him.
Rufus squinted hard at Luc. "I'm warning you..."
Luc nodded in forced agreement and pointed at Meagan.
Meagan then went over to the sidelines. "Damnit..." She mumbled.
"I can't say the f word, but she can say damn?" Keetin demanded.
Chris threw another chunk of ice at the now-small group of contestants.
Jennette and Rufus both desperately grabbed at the ball, making it slip and slide until it finally landed in Rufus' hands.
Rufus smirked at Jennette.
Jennette facepalmed. "Drat..."
Rufus shoved Luc. "Luc. Save the lady the indignity of not being in the bottom two with me."
Lily gasped jealously.
Luc mumbled angrily and went over to the sidelines.
Kortney looked over at him and grinned thoughtfully. He began to converse with him after he sat down with the others.
Chris heled up the final ball he had. "Whoever catches this one will win immunity and will not be voted off at the first merge vote of the season." He threw the ball at the egoistic womanizer and the kind country girl.
Rufus smirked over at Jennette and knocked her to the ground. "Can't let you do that, Jennette." He got the ball with ease.
"That's the game!" Chris announced. "Rufus wins invincibility at tonight's elimination!"
Kortney winked at Jennette. "Don't worry about us. We'll be perfectly okay."
The contestants that Kortney didn't consult looked over each other nervously.
The eight players were shown attending the elimination ceremony that night.
Chris looked over at the teenagers. "Wow. This should be interesting. Since the merge is bringing so much change, we'll be passing out a different symbol of safety from now on." He held up eight balls made of ice.
The contestants groaned and held up their hands in order to block the balls from them.
"This first one goes to Rufus." Chris stated.
Rufus scoffed and easily deflected the ball from hitting him.
"Jennette." Chris continued. "Kortney. Meagan. You three are safe."
The former Seals grinned at each other.
"Luc and Keetin." Chris announced. "You two will not be losing all chance of losing and go home pathetically tonight."
Luc and Keetin sighed in relief and gave thumbs-up to the former Seals.
Lily and Foxface looked at each other nervously.
"Lily. Foxface." Chris scolded. "One of you ladies will be going home empty-handed tonight. And that person is not...
...Foxface." He threw an ice-ball at Foxface.
Lily stood up and gasped. "B-but... I thought everyone liked me... especially Rufus."
The others all laughed as if the statement were completely ridiculous, and it was.
Lily looked at Rufus for guidence.
Rufus shrugged. "See you later, Lily. You can leave now. Seriously, leave."
Lily gasped and burst into tears. She ran to the plane but missed the door and hit the hard metal. She got back up with a bruise and ran into the plane to depart.
Rufus smirked. "That's it for girlfriend number sixty-nine."
"And that's it for this episode." Chris closed. "See you next time... hopefully, On Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 11- In Soviet Russia...
Chris was shown walking down an alleyway, wearing a leather jacket and sporting a puffed up, greasy-with-gel hairdo.
A couple of attractive woman in swimsuits came up to him. They gripped his shoulders and continued to walk with him.
"Oh, Chris..." One of them sighed. "You're such a bad boy."
Chris winked at her. "Oh, Rhonda, I just wish I could--"
"Cut!" A voice called. "Chris."
Chris looked up, nervously. "...Y-yes, Mr. Director?"
The camera zoomed out to show the whole thing was a movie set, with cameras and a crew hanging around in the background.
"You're not working out." The director explained. "So... get the heck out of my face."
"...I didn't get the part?" Chris sobbed.
"Thank goodness." One of the girls mumbled.
Both of the girls threw Chris onto the floor and trudged away snobbily.
The director motioned to the door. "Get out. Seriously, get out."
Chris was shown lying on his bed, awake, weeping. "B-but... I was so good..." He continued to bawl.
"Chris." Phil scolded behind the camera. "As much as I'm enjoying this... and how much I'm sure the audience is, we have to continue with the episode."
"L-last time on Total Drama Antarctica..." Chris blubbered. "The contestants competed in their first individual challenge. After a game of betrayal and deception, Rufus was left the last one standing and won immunity. At elimination, Jennette, Kortney, and Meagan enlisted in the help of some others to get rid of Lily, pretty much a fan least favorite. What will happen this time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Katy, Jerry, and Marill came in to see Chris doing this.
"Uh, Chris..." Jerry sighed.
"You guys are still here?!" Chris exclaimed.
"Awkward..." Phil muttered.
Rufus was merrily staring at the sky, lying against the ice and humming quietly.
Luc trotted up to him.
"Oh, it's you..." Rufus muttered.
Luc nodded desperately. "Yes, Rufus. You are correct, Rufus."
Rufus shrugged. "Don't sweat it. No big deal."
Luc's eyes widened. "So... I see you're pretty happy today."
Rufus nodded. "Totally. It's like a huge, annoying, unintelligent weight has been lifted from my body."
"...I didn't like Lily either." Luc chuckled.
"Whoever said I was talking about Lily?" Rufus pondered.
Luc stared at him with a blank expression drawn on his face.
"...That obvious, huh?" Rufus sighed. "That girl was the annoying thing I've ever had to put up with. And I go to the same school as the kid, Jarrod."
Luc chuckled. "Yeah, um... I wonder who'll go tonight." He chuckled nervously.
Keetin was using colored pencils to draw a sketch in her sketchpad.
Foxface slowly leaned over to look at the paper.
The camera shifted to show a hand-drawn image of a yellow dog and long, multicolored unicorn lying in bed together.
Foxface giggled and glared at Keetin with a raised eyebrow.
"...Don't judge me." Keetin advised. "So, um..." She looked around, checking to see if the other girls were watching them.
Foxface continued to stare at the drawing.
Keetin mumbled something dirty and closed the sketchpad. "Anyway... Do you ever think that the Seals could be a threat? At this point, they're the closest thing to an alliance this game has."
"I know I may have helped them last night..." Keetin muttered. "But I should turn on them while I still have the element of surprise. Since you're pretty much a wildcard right now... would you like to help me?"
Foxface shrugged and nodded.
"Great." Keetin sighed. "All we need now are... two more votes. Yeah, it's pretty obvious there's only one place those can come from." She looked outside at Luc and Rufus.
Jennette, Kortney, and Meagan were shown conversing outside the boys' tent.
"So... we got rid of that chick, Lily." Meagan stated. "What now?"
Kortney shrugged. "We get rid of her supposed boyfriend?"
"I don't think any of the girls left'll fall for 'im, partner." Jennette decided. "We're all way too smart."
Kortney nodded in agreement. "But better safe than sorry."
Meagan shrugged. "Why can't this dumb game be relaxing and fun for once?"
"Cause fun doesn't give you ratings." Kortney chuckled. "And that's all Chris really cares about."
Jennette looked around her. "Isn't this the part where Chris comes in for the challenge?"
Kortney shrugged. "Chris is never punctual."
Chris did, in fact, show up shortly after to begin the chapter.
Jerry, Katy, and Marill were standing behind him.
"...Not to sound rude or anything..." Meagan sighed. "But who the heck are they?"
"A few contestants." Chris replied.
"...We're having three debuters at once?" Luc gasped.
"No." Chris informed in an annoyed tone. "These guys are from one of my other shows. They're stuck here until we get them a ride home."
"And why does this concern us?" Keetin grumbled.
"Because." Chris smirked. "I'm way too busy to try to call some transportation, so it's up to you guys to figure out how to get them back to Russia. First person to figure out how to get them out of here wins immunity at tonight's vote. Begin!" Chris walked away and left the teens alone.
"...So..." Rufus sighed. "Yeah, this isn't going well, is it?"
Katy sighed deeply. "Ugh, can we just get out of here now?"
"...Seriously, how does Chris expect us to do this challenge?" Meagan sighed. "Unless we can somehow hijack the plane we use for elimination and fly it to Russia, we're screwed."
The cast's eyes all widened.
The seven contestants all rushed over to the plane, pressing and pulling at the door to try to get in.
Jennette panted. "It's no use, partner. That there door I've only seen open once: at elimation each night."
"...So we just wait until elimination." Luc decided. "I'm cool with that."
"You idiot." Meagan muttered. "If no one finishes the challenge they'll be no elimination."
Luc nodded sadly. "Right..."
Foxface ran up to the door with a crowbar and attempted to pry the door open.
"Where'd that crowbar come from?" Rufus said skeptically.
"Um, can't we just, like, ask someone inside to open the door?" Marill mumbled meakly.
Foxface ignored him as everyone else did and continued to pick at the door.
The door finally burst open and Foxface ran in.
The pilot was sitting at his post. "...What the heck is going on?"
Keetin's eyes widened.
Foxface attempted to get the pilot out of his seat, in order to hijack the plane.
"...I'm pretty sure this is in some way illegal..." Kortney sighed.
"This reminds me of that music video I shot with that one camera I stole from Worst Buy." Luc sighed back.
Luc was shown wearing a blonde wig and dancing outside a club. "Stop talk-talk-talkin' 'bout law, law, law..." He sang. "You know I'm not scared of no cops, cops, cops..."
The scene cut back to the game.
The other six contestants and the three guests continued to watch Foxface pummel the pilot with wide eyes.
Keetin looked to the side and noticed a cargo boat carrying penguins.
Jerry, Katy, and Marill snuck away silently.
"These people are all insane..." Katy whispered afraidly.
Keetin leaped off the plane and squinted at the cargo ship. She ran up to it, questioning two workers. "Would this ship, by chance, be headed for Russia?"
A man wearing a bear-fur pelt and a tall hat pointed to himself. "What do you think?"
Keetin ran back over to the three lost compeitiors and dragged them by shirt collar to the ship. "Get on board. Get out of this game. Get out my sight. Any objections?"
The three shrugged and boarded the ship.
Chris suddenly showed up behind Keetin. "Congratulations, Keetin! You win today's challenge and are invincible at the vote-off."
"...Where'd you come from?" Keetin sighed with a raised eyebrow.
Foxface was shown still choking the plane's pilot.
Chris' head popped in the door. "Foxface. Stop trying to kill our only pilot. The rest of you, meet me at the elimination ceremony in thirty minutes. Keetin has immunity. That is all."
The contestants facepalmed.
Keetin smirked. "Thirty minutes? That's enough time." She pulled Luc and Rufus aside.
The former Seals looked at each other nervously.
The seven players were seen that night at the elimination.
"Well, well, well." Chris scolded. "Looks like one of you is going to take the plane home tonight... with our untrained, sudden replacement pilot. The first ice-balls go to Keetin and Foxface."
Keetin and Foxface were knocked down by the ice-balls.
"Luc. Rufus." Chris continued. "You two are also safe."
Luc and Rufus sighed in relief and simultaneuosly ducked to avoid the balls.
The three Seals looked at each with nerves.
"Here we go..." Meagan sighed.
"Meagan." Chris called. "You are safe."
Meagan smirked. "Always."
Jennette and Kortney sighed deeply and shook their heads at each other.
"The final ice-ball goes to...
...Kortney." He gave Kortney the final one.
Kortney gasped. "Well, then. Looks like we've been outsmarted. I hope whoever put one over on us at least feels some regret."
Keetin blushed and sighed deeply.
Jennette stood up, also shocked. "Bye, partners. I'll say y'all later. Bye, Kortney, Meagan." She shrugged off saying good-bye to the others and boarded the plane.
"Looks like someone made a potentially game-changing move." Chris closed. "Tune in to see how this plays out next time on Total... Drama... Antactica!"
Chapter 12- Three Girls, One Boat
Chris was shown standing next to two other men, all three of them wearing tuxedos and looking forward in anticipation.
The camera cut to another man wearing the same outfit. He cleared his throat. "And the winner of Best Reality Show Host is..."
Chris cocked his head and smirked.
"..." The announcer continued. "Jett Probst!"
The man to Chris' right went up to the podium and claimed his award. "Thank you, everyone... y'know, hosting Outlaster has really been--"
"Rig!" Chris accused. "Fake! Poser! I demand a recount!"
"Chris." The announcer scolded. "Do we have to call the cops on you again?"
Chris snarled and leaped at the man who won the award, obviously angry. He began to kick him rapidly in the groin.
"Call security!" Jett pleaded.
The camera then went to static.
Chris was shown crying deeply in a corner of his bedroom after about fifteen seconds of static.
"Chris." Phil yelled. "It was your fault you almost went to jail for attacking someone at the Gemmies."
Chris continued to sob. "I-I don't care. I wanted that award... so bad. I don't care what I did!"
"Chris." Phil demanded. "Just do the dang recap and we can get the camera off you."
Chris forced himself to pull himself together. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica." He began. "The players had to find a way to get Jerry, Katy, and Marill back to Russia. After an extremely violent scene involving Foxface, Keetin managed to hitch them a boat ride back to where they're supposed to be, claiming immunity. At elimination, it came down to Jennette's elimination for being a threat and having a close alliance with Meagan and Kortney. What will happen this time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
"...You know the angry artist and the creepy fox-like chick are going to go for for one of us next, right?" Meagan sighed.
"Yep." Kortney replied. "Don't know which one, though."
"Probably you." Meagan chuckled.
"Yeah..." Kortney agreed. "Wait, what?"
"Come on..." Meagan teased. "They'll be quick to figure out who puts more effort into this game."
Kortney shrugged and nodded in agreement. "We can at least try to get majority tonight."
Meagan shook her head. "The only other votes are from the smelly musician and the uncharming womanizer."
"We're right here!" Luc and Rufus called from inside the tent.
"...Do you bother to learn anyone's name?" Kortney scoffed.
"Of course I do..." Meagan muttered. "...Andrew?"
Keetin and Foxface were shown discussing strategy in the girls' tent.
"So..." Keetin sighed contently. "Pretty nice postition in the game, right?"
"Kortney is definately out next." Keetin informed. "Not that I think you're so stupid you don't already know that."
Foxface stared at Keetin annoyedly.
"People sometimes say I'm hyper." Keetin sighed. "But that's not true, is it? I mean, I'm not hyper at all. I'm, like, totally calm. Right?"
"..." Foxface said.
"...PJ." Keetin remarked. "Total PJ."
Foxface folded her arms.
Keetin pulled out a drawing of Foxface making out with a creepy British dude petting a Nyan Cat.
"...What?" Keetin pressed.
Luc and Rufus were shown together in the boys' cabin.
"So..." Luc cooed. "Pretty good position in the game, eh? We can side with whoever we want."
"Yeah, whatever." Rufus sighed, tapping away at his myPhone.
"You know, Rufus, the other day I was just--" Luc began.
"Yeah, hold that thought." Rufus inturrupted. He tapped a button on his myPhone. He put it up to his right ear. "Yeah, Monica..."
Luc's eyes widened. "Is this another of your girlfriends?"
"No, she's my mom." Rufus retorted sarcastically. "So, yeah, Monique... what do you mean, you're mad I cheated on you for some TV girl? What do you mean, it's unfair? It's not like you didn't see that coming. What do you mean, that's not the point? What do you mean, stop copying everything you say?"
"...Smooth?" Luc scoffed. "Is Monica hot?"
Rufus hung up the phone. "She was... then she started eating from McRonald's."
Luc nodded. "That'll do it..."
The six remaining contestants met Chris outside for the challenge.
"Welcome, players." Chris greeted. "Today's challenge will take a little... teamwork."
The contestants looked over each other.
"It's a classic battle of the sexes..." Chris paused.
The cast stared blankly at him.
"...Huh." Chris observed. "I expected some obnoxious snickers."
Luc burst into laughter. "He said se--"
Kortney covered his mouth.
Chris facpalmed. "Moving on... the challenge is a traditional Sunday retreat: a fishing trip. First team to catch a fish while on their boat wins." He pointed to two boats.
"...Those boys are going down!" Keetin declared.
"Please." Rufus scoffed. "I'll take you down just like all my girlfriends."
"...Insert generally sexist comment here." Meagan sighed.
"Insert generally sexist response here." Kortney replied.
"OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Meagan and Kortney cried in unison.
"...Whose side are you on?" Luc pressed, glaring at Kortney.
Kortney rolled his eyes and followed the other two guys into one of the boats. "Let's just go."
Meagan sighed deeply. "Can we just lose or something, already?"
Foxface and Keetin gave Meagan a death glare and dragged her onto the other boat.
Meagan was shown sitting on a reclining chair on the boat. "...How's the fishing trip going, ladies?"
Keetin glared at the lazy, sarcastic girl. "It would be a lot better if you joined us."
Meagan shrugged. "No thanks. I'm not into fishing."
"That was more of a command than an invitation." Keetin snapped.
"I know that." Meagan scoffed. "But that doesn't mean I'll actually join you."
Foxface cast her line out to sea. She stared emotionlessly at the water.
"...I don't get why Chris thought this would be interesting." Keetin pouted.
The boys were having about the same amount of luck. All three had their lines cast out, but were catching nothing.
"...This sucks." Luc sighed.
"I agree, but we at least have to try to beat Foxface and Keetin." Kortney responded.
"...And Meagan?" Rufus cooned. "What about Meagan?"
Kortney nodded reluctantly. "Yeah, right. Her too."
Rufus glared at him. "One more remark like that..."
"One more remark like what?" Luc asked.
Rufus facepalmed and pushed Luc off the boat.
Luc faceplanted into the ocean. "What was that for?!"
"For being annoying." Rufus scoffed.
Foxface was shown with her line still thrown out to sea. Suddenly, the line began to jerk back and forth rapidly.
Keetin's eyes widened. "Foxface! Did you catch something?"
Foxface nodded as a gigantic fish-monster broke through the dock of the boat and peered down at the girls.
Even Meagan looked up in fear at the mutant beast.
The fish climbed out of the ocean and... flopped on its back and died due to inability to breathe.
Meagan burst into laughter. "Oh, that was priceless..."
Chris rode up on a jet ski. "Mm-hmm. Girls, you win the battle-of-the-sexes challenge, getting invincibilty at the vote tonight. And, as a consolation prize... for Meagan, TV service in your tent for the remainder of the compeition."
The girls, even Meagan, cheered.
The boys were shown still fishing, unaware of the girls' victory.
Chris and the girls came riding uncomfortably on the one jet ski.
"See you at elimiantion, boys." Keetin called. "You have the right to be afraid."
"I take it they won?" Kortney sighed deeply. "This should be interesting."
Luc sighed back. "Dang it." He then farted, making a fish float up to the surface.
"Fart jokes?" Rufus scoffed. "The author is just getting more and more desperate."
"In his defense, he could've been parodying how much Total Drama uses fart jokes." Kortney argued.
"I bet he made you say that." Rufus gasped.
The six players were seen at elimination that night.
"Welcome to the ever-dreaded elimination ceremony." Chris said. "Tonight, the six of you teens will become five. Meagan, Keetin, Foxface, since you won immunity, you ladies are safe." He threw ice-balls at the three.
The girls dodged them with ease.
Meagan frowned and looked over at Kortney encouragingly.
Keetin and Foxface smirked.
"...Luc." Chris continued. "You live to see another day of this game."
Luc sighed in relief before being smacked to the ground by the ice-ball.
Rufus and Kortney looked bitterly at each other.
"So, it's all down to Rufus and Kortney." Chris cooed. "One of you will be going home tonight, never to return to the game... ever. And that person is not...
...Rufus." He chucked the final ball he had at the cocky womanizer.
Rufus cheered and smirked at Kortney.
Kortney stood up. "Can't say I didn't really see that coming. Well played, everyone... I guess. See you later, Meagan. Good luck."
Meagan waved at him. "See you on the flipside, puppet boy."
"Come on, I put the puppet away episodes ago." Kortney chuckled. He pulled out Pepe and began to talk in his voice. "I represent the Kortney of a few days ago..." He then boarded the plane, Pepe in hand, soaring away from the contest.
"And that's it for another somewhat nail-biting elimination." Chris closed. "What will happen next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 13- My Best Friend Is A Loser
Chris was once again shown at a bright, galliant awards program. Two other men, also in tuxedos like him, stood beside him.
An elderly, evil-looking man stood smirking as he opened the envelope. "And this Silver Strawberry award goes to..."
Chris and the other men looked worried and anxious at the announcer.
"...Chris McLean!" The announcer finished.
Chris ran up gleefully to the podium and claimed his award. "Thank you all that voted for me! I never thought I would--"
The audience and other nominees began to guffaw at him.
"...W-what's so funny?" Chris demanded. "Why is everyone laughing?"
"Chris." Jett from the previous night commented. "You do know what the award you just won is for, right?"
Chris read the print on his trophy, reading it aloud as, "Silver Strawberry Award. Worst Reality Show Host. Chris McLean."
The audience continued to laugh.
Chris turned pale and began to stammer incoherently until he lost consiousness and fell onto the floor with a thud.
Chris was shown once again weeping under the covers in his bed.
"Chris." Phil scolded. "Come on. You actually won the award this time. Sure, it may have been an award no one would ever want to get, but..."
"But what?!" Chris sobbed. "Even when I win, I've lost!"
Phil sighed deeply. "Fine. Is there anything I can get you, your patheticness?"
"Yes." Chris approved. "Go get me a sandwich."
"I'm not going to get a sandwich..." Phil muttered.
Chris began to weep louder and more annoyingly.
"Ugh..." Phil groaned. "Fine, then. Have it your way." He walked away, off to prepare Chris' request.
"Last time on Total Drama Antarctica." Chris began. "The contestants competed in a battle-of-the-sexes challenge, boys versus girls. After a terrifying encounter with a giant fish, the girls ended up as the victors. At elimination, the Seals suffered another hugs blow as Kortney was sent packing. What will happen now that Meagan is the only Seal remaining? Will Keetin and Foxface continue to be the masterminds of this game? And will Rufus and Luc ever get any power in this thing? Find out right now on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Keetin and Foxface were shown conversing with each other in the girls' tent, Meagan not present.
Keetin was drawing a picture of Meagan, Luc, and Rufus lying dead on the ground, her and Foxface triumphantly next to them. "So... how does it feel to be in complete control of this game?"
Foxface opened her mouth to say something, but was stopped.
"Yeah, I know right?" Keetin sighed in pleasure. "Who do you think we should brutally crush next?"
Foxface once again attempted to make a statement, but was cut off.
"Yeah, Meagan's pretty volatile." Keetin agreed. "Would do you think we should get?"
Foxface made no attempt to respond, only waited for Keetin to answer her own question.
"Yeah." Keetin replied to herself. "Rufus would totally lose to either of us in a vote. You're really good at strategizing."
Foxface rolled her eyes and facepalmed.
Luc and Rufus were shown in the boys' tent.
Rufus shrugged. "I guess. TV's not so great... except for those dirty shows my parents block."
Luc nodded, as if he had a clue what came on television. "Yeah... I haven't seen TV in... six years? The only channels my aunt had were the Cats For Cat Ladies Network and the Knitting Channel."
"...That sounds real interesting." Rufus replied sarcastically. "I bet you had a lot of fun with her. Did your parents work all day or something?"
Luc blushed. "Um... yeah. Totally. You could say they didn't even have time to give me permission to be on the show."
"Don't you have to get permission from a parent?" Rufus pressed. "Isn't that why that bald skater guy got eliminated that one time?"
Luc stared at him blankly. "That rule must've been overturned or something... Or that story and this one where written by different authors who have different in-game rules... or whatever."
"...Is there anyone here not aware they're in a story and being controlled by an author?" Rufus complained.
"...Probably not." Luc sighed.
Meagan was shown staring intently at the television in the girls' cabin, Keetin and Foxface now sitting next to her.
"So, Meagan..." Keetin began. "How do feel about--"
"I don't care." Meagan dismissed. She clicked a button on the remote, making the TV's channel change.
"'Cause I am, you are, we are..." The TV droned. "Exceptional, exceptional."
"...Curse you, Japann Anna McClone." Meagan prodded and clicked the same button again.
"So, Meagan, how do think we should--" Keetin tried.
"I don't give a, I don't give a, I don't give a..." Meagan sang. "Seriously, I don't care."
"Men, men, men, men, manly men, men, men, men..." The TV droned on.
"...Hated this one since that drunk one was fired." Meagan sighed.
Keetin facepalmed. "Do you care about anything else besides TV?"
Meagan clicked the button again. "Not really."
Keetin grumbled, "I'm going to see if Chris is here yet."
The other four contestants soon met Keetin outside with Chris.
"Welcome, final five." Chris greeted. "You've made it very, very far in this game and should be proud of yourself."
"...There's a catch to you praising us, right?" Keetin sighed. "There's some sort of really annoying or hard challenge coming up, right?"
"...Y-yeah, kind of." Chris admitted. "Since you're the final five, I decided the challenge should be to bond with your... opposites."
"Opposites?" Luc questioned. "What do you mean, opposites?"
"I'd like you all welcome back some familiar faces." Chris announced. "The first five eliminated from the game."
Luc leaned over to Rufus and whispered, "I thought Zanibanito died."
"...So did I." Rufus whispered back, just as confused.
"Your challenge is to bond with a loser of my choice." Chris smirked. "The pairs are... Allan and Foxface."
Allan ran up to Foxface and held his hand up for a high-five. "Foxy! How you been doin'?"
Foxface simply glared at him blankly.
"Betti and Keetin."
Betti scoffed. "As if you're simply acting to be disgusted. You should be honored to be paired with me... not that I'm going to actaully help you, you should be honored."
"Franklin and Luc."
"...ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?!" Luc demanded.
Franklin folded his arms. "For once, I agree with him. There's no way we can play together."
Chris smirked. "Mm-hmm. Next pair is Ronald and Meagan."
Ronald squealed giddily and hugged Meagan tightly.
Meagan groaned. "At least he'll cooperate."
Rufus' eyes widened. "That means...?"
Zanibanito ran up to him. "UNICORN NYAN-RIFFIC VIOLIN FROM AUSTRALIA!"
Rufus facepalmed. "This is going to be loads of fun."
"You have thirty minutes to make your partner look like they know everything about you; like they're your best friend." Chris explained.
"...My 'best friend' is a loser." Rufus sighed.
Chris ignored and walked away.
Allan and Foxface were shown in the girls' tent together.
"So, Foxy..." Allan sighed. "How do you think I should act, to be like you?"
Foxface stared at him blankly. "..."
Allan chuckled, but quickly went to a straight face. "..."
"..." Foxface responded.
This continued for a minute.
"...I can take a hint." Allan assured. "I get it." He continued to stare blankly into space, saying nothing. "...I'm doing so well."
Betti and Keetin were shown outside, Keetin holding her hand to her forehead.
"...Well." Keetin grumbled. "It's pretty clear you have no artistic talent." She stared at an atrocious drawing Betti had drawn.
"I'm rich." Betti explained. "I don't need to have talent."
Keetin facepalmed. "Can you, like, pretend to strategize like I do?"
Betti shook her head. "I'm too good for a strategy."
Keetin mumbled something dirty. "Is there anything you're not too good for?"
Betti put her index finger to her chin, as if to think about this question. "...Not really, no."
Keetin facepalmed again. "Look, is there anything you can do to help me win?"
"...Nah, it'd be too much effort." Betti stated. "I don't need effort, with the amount of money I have."
Franklin and Luc were shown trying to win in the boys' cabin.
"...This sucks." Luc sighed.
"Tell me about it." Franklin complained back.
"Is there any way you want to help me win?" Luc asked. "Any way at all?"
"Not really." Franklin replied.
"I thought not." Luc shrugged. "Wait, won't me losing also mean you losing?"
"Muh, I've already lost this inferior game." Franklin explained. "There's no point now."
"...I hate you." Luc stated.
"Same to you, my 'friend.'" Frankin replied.
Meagan and Ronald were shown together.
"...Do I really have to do anything?" Meagan inquired. "You already know enough about me, you stalker."
Ronald blushed. "Well... I don't know that much about you."
"Ronald." Meagan sighed. "No matter what, I want you to give your answer to these next few questions."
"What is my favorite color?" Meagan asked.
"Dark cyan." Ronald answered immediately.
"What's my favorite food?"
"Anything fattening and sugary."
"What did I have for breakfast three years ago today?"
"Donuts and orange juice."
"...Dude, not even I knew that last one." Meagan scoffed. "Seriously, you're creeping me out."
"So, if I win the challenge, will you be happy to be around me?" Ronald inquired.
"...I guess so." Meagan shrugged.
Ronald squealed in pleasure and giddily jumped up and down.
Rufus and Zanibanito were shown in the boys' cabin.
"OMG WHY DO YOU KEEP INSULTING THE MAGICAL UNICORNS FROM MY PANTS?!" Zanibanito demanded.
Rufus faceapalmed. "It's pretty obvious we're going to get nowhere with this."
Zanibanito slapped Rufus and ran out of the tent, screaming something about too many TV remotes.
Rufus muttered something dirty. "Come back here right now or else I'll shove a--"
A creepy-looking British guy was shown on-screen. "Hello, children. I'm here to read you a story while the scary man says something too dirty for your young eyes to see." He opened up a storybook. "Once there was a Nyan Cat who died. The End... sad, isn't it?" He shed a tear from his eye.
"..." Rufus said in the tent, apparently done with his rant. "Zanibanito, come back here right now or I'll make sure you never--"
"...Dude, there's no way you can write that in to a PG-rated story." The 26-year-old said.
"But--" The 12-year-old protested.
"Take it out or re-rate the story, yo." The 17-year-old advised.
The ten contestants of the challenge were now shown with Chris.
"Okay..." Chris sighed. "Let's see how this turned out. Allan, you can go first." Allan went up to Chris and said absolutely nothing. "..."
"Very convincing." Chris complimented. "That's going to be hard to top... Betti."
Betti groaned and stepped to Chris. "I'm an artist and... stuff. I strategize. I'm Kettin, or whatever."
"...Keetin, you better have something planned, because you're not getting immunity tonight." Chris sighed. "Go ahead, Franklin."
Franklin shrugged and simply boarded the plane to go home.
"...Can't say I didn't see that coming." Luc admitted.
"...Y'know, I think this challenge is really one-sided." Chris chuckled. He looked at Ronald who was dressed like Meagan. "Ronald... go."
Ronald lied on the ground and began munching on chicken wings, not moving at all. "You guys all suck and it's so easy to make fun of you." He said, in an exact impression of Meagan.
"...Zanibanito, please submit your useless entry now that Meagan has won." Chris commanded.
Zanibanito simply screamed and blew into a million pieces.
"Well, now that that's out of the way..." Chris sighed. "Meagan has invincibility. See you losers at the elimination... as for the literal losers..." He pushed Betti, Zanibanito, Ronald, Franklin, and Allan onto the plane as it took off.
The final five were seen at elimination.
"Welcome to the elimination ceremony." Chris stated. "These first ice-balls go to Meagan and Keetin."
Meagan and Keetin nodded as the balls flew past them.
"Foxface." Chris continued. "You are also safe."
Foxface smiled at Keetin.
Rufus and Luc looked worriedly at each other.
"Luc, Rufus." Chris scolded. "You boh kind of sucked in the challenge, and have reasons to be eliminated... but the fnal ice-ball goes to...
Rufus cheered and quickly caught the ice-ball.
Luc stood up, shocked. "Wow. I knew pretty much all I had was pity on my side, but I thought I could actually win. Looks like I have to go back to abhorrent life now. See you jerks later."
The others looked down in shame.
Luc boarded the plane and flashed the finger at the ones who had eliminated him.
"Well, that's it for a somewhat dirty episode of Total Drama." Chris closed. "See you next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 14- Shriek
Chris was shown lying in bed, staring at a television with wide eyes, trembling.
"Hello?" A woman on the TV called. "Is anyone there?" A creaking noise was heard.
"No!" Chris yelled. "Tanya! Don't do it! Don't open the door!"
A scream was heard from the TV as a cutting noise and splatter rang through the room.
Chris yelped even louder than the girl on the TV and ducked down under the covers. "Okay, that's enough of that..." He muttered and switched the TV off with a remote.
The closet door began to rattle.
Chris' eyes widened. He picked up a lap he had by his nightstand and pointed it at the door. "Stay back... I have a lamp!"
The doorknob shook as the door burst open.
Chris shrieked and hid under the bed.
Phil had come out of the door and was laughing at Chris. "Chris... it's just me."
Chris looked up and sighed in relief. "Phil... wait, what were you doing in the closet?"
Phil blushed. "Uh..."
A brown-haired girl a few inches shorter than Phil came out of the closet. "See you Saturday, Phil." She winked at Chris.
"...Terra?!" Chris gasped. "P-phil... you're dating my ex-wife?!"
Terra shrugged. "Emphasis on the 'ex', I suppose. See you, Phil." She left the room.
Chris began to sob quietly and buried his head in the covers once again.
The camera was shown being held by Chris, under the bed sheets, being lit up by a small flashlight. "L-last time on Total Drama Antarctica..." Chris started, still somewhat bawling. "The final five competed to see who had the most social skills to bond with a partner of my choice. In the end, Meagan won when her partner, Ronald, gave an almost terrifying impression of her. Keetin and Foxface once again succeeded at the elimination, managing to get rid of everyone's favorite bum, Luc. Will Luc's elimination change the game? Will Rufus continue to get far with his unlikeable personality and low threat level? Find out right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Keetin was shown holding a small video camera to her face and grinning at it. "Hello, loyal viewers..." She facepalmed and turned the camera off.
Foxface was shown to be standing right next to her. She pointed to the camera, then at Keetin.
"I'm trying to make a viral MyCircle video." Keetin explained.
Foxface rolled her eyes.
Keetin pondered this. "Maybe I should cuss a lot and make a bunch of inappropriate jokes... and play all the characters myself."
Keetin was shown in a bedroom, staring into her camera. "And, what the !@#$? I mean, that's worse than when Keetnaynay did that boy."
Keetin was shown in a ghetto outfit, chuckling. "You got that right!"
"Or maybe a random, annoying-type comedy." Keetin suggested, now back in real life.
Keetin's next fantasy showed her running around her house, screaming in a high-pitched voice, "My mother has issues and Kera kissed Jude! AHHHHHHH!"
"Or what about reviewing other videos while making terrible jokes?" Keetin thought aloud.
She was then shown against a background of several random pictures. "What's happening, forum? So, like, this video got like, two hundred views, but I love it because people get hurt in it."
Foxface facepalmed in real life. "You might as well be iKeetin..." She muttered.
Keetin was shown singing horribly against an obviously fake background. "I gotta feeling, that this parody sucks and is not in tune, and that I only sing about computers..."
Rufus was shown with Meagan.
"So... what do you want?" Meagan sighed.
Rufus shrugged. "An alliance, maybe a relationship?"
"Why the heck would I do that?" Meagan scoffed.
"Because you find me sexy?" Rufus winked.
"...Dude. I saw what you did to Lily." Meagan explained. "We all saw what you did to Lily."
"But--" Rufus protested
"Seriously, I think even people who weren't there know..." Meagan sighed. "Oh, yeah, of course they do. Because you did it on live TV."
Rufus facepalmed. "Look, is there anything I can do to make you trust me?"
"...Probably not." Meagan chuckled. "But I'd love to see you beg to me... as long as you stay fully clothed."
Rufus muttered angry words and walked out of the boys' tent.
Meagan shrugged. "No loss there, at least on my part."
The contestants were shown outside for the challenge, despite it being dark out.
Chris was standing in front of them in an elegant robe, smoking a pipe.
"...Is that a real pipe?" Keetin worried.
Chris shook his head. "Nah. It's just one of those bubble ones you see on cartoons." He blew bubbles out its end.
"More importantly, you didn't give us a challenge all day." Meagan complained. "What are we supposed to do now, when it's dark?"
Chris smirked. "Chill... out." He reasoned. "I've arranged a little treat for you, the final four." He pointed to a large, previously unseen mansion to his right.
"...What is that doing there and how did we miss it?" Meagan muttered.
Chris shrugged. "It's a gift. Don't question it."
"You got to agree with that." Rufus admitted.
Chris escorted the four into the mansion. "Welcome to McLean Manor."
"...There's no way you could've afforded this." Meagan pointed out.
Foxface stifled a laugh.
Chris glared at her. "It didn't cost that much..."
A chandelir on the roof began to flicker and rattle.
The lights suddenly turned off and turned back on.
Chris was now a skeleton laying on the floor.
Foxface, Rufus, and Keetin began to panic.
"...Seriously?" Meagan sighed.
Keetin ceased running around in circles and glared at Meagan. "What do you mean, 'seriously?'"
"This is probably Chris' idea of a Halloween special or something." Meagan explained. "I mean, it's such a cliche. Someone's murdered in the dark, someone in the room's the killer, and we find out who it is after they're the only one left."
"But what if Chris actually died?" Rufus asked. "I mean, I don't like him. There's got to at least one person who hates him enough to kill him."
Meagan nodded. "I have to admit, that's true."
"So, we find out who killed Chris?" Keetin asked. "That should be fun." She continued sarcastically.
Rufus shrugged. "Muh. I'm going to go take a shower all by myself in a dark bathroom."
Meagan facepalmed. "Why? Why the heck would you do that?"
"'Cause." Rufus reasoned. "I gotta smell fresh." He went into a bathroom and began to disrobe.
The others were shown back outside. "So... what do we do?" Meagan pondered.
"Sit around and wait for Rufus to die, I guess." Keetin suggested.
"..." Foxface said. "No PJ."
Meagan rolled her eyes. "Dang it."
Rufus was shown in the shower, from a non-perverted angle. He was half-humming, half-singing a song. "Womanizer, womanzier, womanizer..."
A door creak was heard.
Rufus was startled. "H-hello? Who's there?"
Footsteps were heard.
"I don't want you seeing me naked!" Rufus warned. "...Unless you're a girl."
A person in a black robe and a Nyan Cat mask opened the curtain. They looked down for a minute.
Rufus shrieked. "W-what do you want?!"
They continued to look down.
"...Female perv." Rufus mumbled.
From outside, Rufus was heard groaning as blood splattered.
Meagan jumped. She looked around. Foxface and Keetin were still in the room.
"So... none of us are the killer?" Keetin concluded. "What do we do know?"
"None of us could've went in there and come back so quickly." Meagan sighed. "It couldn't have been any of us, not even Foxface."
Foxface glared at Meagan and rolled her eyes.
"We might as well get something to eat." Keetin stated. "I mean, there's no reason not to."
Meagan and Foxface shrugged and went into the dining room.
The three sat down at the large, long dining table.
Meagan lifted the lid on the dish in the center and found nothing under it. She pointed at Foxface. "Why don't you go get the food?"
Foxface mumbled a profanity and went into the kitchen to get the dinner.
Foxface was shown inside the kitchen, lifting the lid off of a large pot on the stove.
The head of the same person who killed Rufus was shown inside.
Foxface shrieked and jumped back.
The person somehow climbed out of the stove, revealing that they carved some sort of hole in it.
Foxface began to back up as the killer aimed at her.
Foxface went through door and began to back up away from the killer for what seemed to her like hours.
The killer smirked as Foxface's agonizing screams were heard in the dining room.
"...You just had to tell her to go in there alone." Keetin scolded. "I mean, seriously?"
Meagan rolled her eyes. "At this point, we can at least save ourselves. I mean, come on. The killer can't be that clever."
Said murderer then emerged from the kitchen, looking directly at Meagan.
Keetin and Meagan jumped.
The killer approached them slowly, staring intently.
"...What kind of killer are you?" Meagan demanded. "It takes you like two years to even touch a victim."
The killer took a spoon out of their back pokcket and waved it in a threatening motion.
"What kind of weapon is a spoon?" Keetin scoffed. "How do you even kill anyone?"
The killer pulled a switch on the spoon, making several blades and knives come out.
Keetin and Meagan held each other for dear life and yelped.
"I really wish that thing that seemed really insignificent that the reader doesn't even remember would come to save us right now." Keetin hoped.
The chandelir from earlier once again flickered and rattled, then fell from the roof and crushed the killer.
"...And there it is." Keetin sighed triumphantly.
A clapping sound was heard from afar.
Chris came out from a previously unseen door and congratulated the girls. "Congratulations. You two win the challenge. Kind of got you there, huh?"
Meagan folded her arms. "Mm-hmm. You planned all this and killed the other contestants just to put on a challenge?"
"Is there any real surprise?" Chris chuckled.
"I suppose there shouldn't be." Keetin mumbled.
Rufus and Foxface came out of the same door.
"Looks like some people seemed real concerned about me." Rufus scoffed. "The killer just kidnapped us and stuffed into a closet."
"How do you magically have clothes on now?" Keetin questioned.
"...It was a wardrobe closet?" Rufus sighed.
Foxface nodded. "..."
"I'll see you at the elimination in thirty minutes." Chris continued. "I'm sure it'll be interesting." He walked away.
The final four were shown at elimination that night.
"Final four." Chris scolded. "Half of are you safe... making for a kind of obvious elimination. Meagan, Keetin, you two are safe."
Meagan and Keetin cocked their heads and smirked.
Foxface looked at Rufus deviously.
Rufus folded his arms and faced to the side. "I'm not scared of any of you b****es."
"The final ice-ball goes to...
Foxface swiftly dodged the ball and smirked at Rufus.
Rufus got up cockily. "Of course I would get voted out for being the last guy left. You all are so sexist."
"Look who's talking." Meagan muttered.
Rufus glared back at her. "Fine, then. I'm out of here." He boarded the plane.
"...Final three." Keetin sighed. "Sweet."
Chris nodded. "See what happens to our final three next time right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
The killer from the challenge was shown back at the mansion. They took off their mask, revealing a young girl with brown hair and an attractive face.
"Dang it." She murmured. "That sucked."
She got out from under the chandelir.
"If they think they've gotten rid of me..." She yelled. "They're wrong! Zari Arbinian will return! ...After she stalks Mr. Chapman." She went off to spy on her tenth grade science teacher.
Chapter 15- A Generic Losers' Chapter
Rufus was shown on the Plane of Losers, staring out the window with eyes half-closed. He muttered inchoerently to himself, slowly falling asleep.
Suddenly, the lights on the roof turned blinking red as a loud siren blared through the cabin.
Rufus immediately sat up and began panting.
The pilot came out of his cockpit and flashed a reassuring look at Rufus. He strapped on a parachute and lept out of the jet.
Rufus' eyes widened. He began to scream his head off as the plane descended towards a small tropical island.
The plane smacked onto the water with a furious splash and slid towards the island gently.
Rufus slowly stepped off the plane and onto the island. He took a few steps. "Okay, don't panic." He said to himself. "Nothing good's going to happen if you panic." He sifted through a few trees and mud until he stumbled upon something remotely close to civilization.
The other losers were sitting around a large hotel, complete with a small pool and snack bar.
Rufus gasped. "...This is where everyone goes after they get eliminated?"
Betti nodded. "You probably thought the plane crashed and left you for dead, you idiot. Chris just pulls that stunt to scare people."
Rufus glared back at her. "I'm sure you've had lots of time to spare here."
Jennette emerged from the hotel. "Howdy there, Rufus. I see you're out. Maybe now that you're here you can take care of... her."
Betti and her shuddered.
"...Her?" Rufus sighed. "Who's her?"
A loud shrieking was heard from afar.
"Oh, great." Betti grumbled. "I hoped she got eaten by those panthers that dragged her away last night."
Lily emerged, tattered clothes, from the trees behind the hotel. She immediately looked to Rufus. "Rufus!" She ran up and hugged him.
Rufus muttered a curse and pushed Lily off of him. "Look, Lily. The game is over... at least for me, anyway. Which means I don't have to pretend to like you anymore." He walked away angrily.
Lily stared into the distance and once again began to weep.
Jennette facepalmed. "Oh, great..."
Ronald was shown lying on a reclining chair by the pool.
"I learned a lot from my experience on the show." He stated, pushing his glasses up. "Winning a real reality show is much harder than winning a virtual one. I always thought staying focused would be easy... but then Meagan came in."
Franklin was lying next to him.
"Who even cares about the compeition anymore?" He asked. "We're out, and get to stay somewhere I'm sure is better than where you peasants normally live. As for me, it only goes up from here. Now that the public knows my name, I'll be getting recognized and casted all over."
Kortney was shown looking through binoculars at a girl in a swimsuit.
Zari Arbinian was shown standing in a swimsuit next to the pool.
"Time to go for a swim..." She mumbled.
Kortney smirked and shook his head.
A short, brown-haired boy popped out from behind him. "Hey, she's my obcession.
Kortney glared at him. "Get out of here, little man."
"Fine then." The boy warned. "But I have connections in the author world." He skimped away quickly.
Zari suddenly popped up in front of Kortney. "Hiya."
Kortney jumped in shock. "Oh... it's just you."
Zari giggled. "I love scaring people. If only my freaky sister were here. She would make you freak out."
Kortney nodded awkwardly and slowly backed away from the random girl.
Cristen was shown lying under an umbrella and rocking back and forth.
Bunny was sitting next to her. "Um... are you okay?"
"Why would I, like, not be, like, okay?" Cristen asked. "I mean I, like, don't, like, even, like, know what I would, like, be like as a not-okay person."
"...Seriously, you need some mental help." Bunny sighed. "You think your boyfriend is some sort of monster or whatever and that he glitters in the sun."
"Just like you..." Cristen complimented. "Your skin is so shiny..."
Bunny facepalmed. "Cristen, you--"
"Shouldn't you, like, go, like, play with some, like, animals, like?" Cristen demanded.
Bunny glared at the moody girl and walked away pridefully.
Luc sighed deeply and took a sip of a coconut drink. "I learned a lot from my time on the show." He told Allan. "I learned that being social is important to get far... and, um... you're not listening to a word of this, are you?"
Allan was snoring away at the chair across from the filthy bum.
"...Yeah, so once I get home, I'm actually hoping Total Drama helped launch my career... or at least launch something." Luc admitted. "Maybe I'll even make some sappy reunion with my aunt or whatever." He glared over at Allan. "Allan. Wake up."
Allan was jolted awake. "Dah! I'm sorry, Ms. Thomas..."
"I'm not your teacher, Allan." Luc sighed. "Why am I even hanging out with you?" He walked away angrily.
Bunny was shown sitting on a rotten tree stump, stabbing knives into wooden carvings of Rufus and Lily. "As if I don't feel angry towards those dysfunctional romantics... ex-romantics. I never thought this game would get hard, with all the idiots who signed up."
Zanibanito suddenly ran by, mumbling incoherently.
"...I rest my case." Bunny sighed. "I guess I finally know why I get along better with animals than people: animals won't double-cross you. Hopefully one of my only allies, Foxface and Keetin, will win the money. Maybe then I can leave this place feeling good about myself."
Zanibanito ran by once again and bumped into a palm tree, getting knocked unconsious.
Chapter 16- Chappy Makes Me Happy
Chris was shown sitting on a leather chair, staring at the screen happily.
"And now." An announcer's voice welcomed. "A public service announcement by Chris McLean. Because we couldn't get anyone better."
"Hello." Chris greeted. "Today, I will be talking about--"
A bulldozer suddenly rammed into the side of the room and completely smashed the wall to pieces.
Chris jumped and began to hyperventilate. "W-who are you and what are you doing to my house?!"
Zari Arbinan stepped out of the bulldozer. "Hello again, Chris."
"...That weird girl from a few chapters ago?!" Chris gasped. "I thought you died or something."
"No one ever died from a chandelir, idiot." Zari claimed. "Now move out of the way. This ground is scheduled for demolition."
"...Wh-why?" Chris demanded. "Who wants to build something in Antarctica?!"
"Me." Zari answered. "In just a few hours, this place will be the Mr. Chapman Cardboard Cutout Factory."
"First of all, you can't do that to me." Chris stated. "And second of all, you can't build an entire factory in a few hours."
"I'll figure it out." Zari promised. "Now freaking get out of my way." She restarted the bulldozer.
Chris yelped and ran out the front door.
Zari smirked and plowed the rest of the conceited host's house down.
Chris was later shown sitting inside one of the contestants' tents. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica." He began. "The final four were locked in a mansion and were slowly killed off by the girl who just destroyed my house. After Keetin and Meagan defeated her, they won invincibility. In an obvious vote, Rufus was sent packing as Foxface joined the other girls in the final three. Who will advance to the finals? Who will be sent home by a fellow contestant? Find out right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
The three girls left in the compeition were seen in their tent.
"So... only one challenge left until the finals." Keetin sighed.
Meagan nodded. "Yep. I never thought this game would be so freaking easy. I pretty much just did absolutely nothing and let the abhorrent players who everyone would rather eliminate go instead of me."
Foxface rolled her eyes.
"It's not like you had an especially smart strategy." Meagan retorted. "You barely talked and just let some allies get you enough votes to stay."
Foxface glared at the lazy pessimist.
Keetin sighed deeply. "Calm down, guys. It's not like we've really played very good games. Even I admit I went from a nice artist to some sort of strategic jerk."
Meagan chuckled. "You got that right. You've pretty much secured yourself a place in the finals. If I win immunity, I take you to easily win by vote. If Foxface wins immunity, she takes her ally to the finals."
Keetin gave a half-smile. "I guess so. Tomorrow'll be an interesting day for all of us."
Foxface smirked at the two other girls.
The three later met Chris outside for the challenge.
Chris' eyes widened. "Wait! Don't step out of the tents!"
Zari Arbinian suddenly came from the side and used her bulldozer from earlier to completely obliterate the contestants' tents.
"..." Foxface said. "What the f--"
"Thank you for being so agreeable." Zari thanked to the girls. "In just a few hours, my dream factory will be complete."
Chris sat down on the ice and began rocking back and forth, making irregular noises.
"...What do we do now?" Meagan demanded.
"Wait, I guess." Keetin suggested.
A timecard reading "A Few Hours Later" was shown.
The girls were still staring at Chris' panic attack.
Chris suddenly stopped mumbling and looked behind him. The factory was now complete.
"...Yeah, it's been a few hours." Keetin informed.
Chris gasped. "B-but... this can't be. This can't be. My show... it's ruined. My career... well, that died a long time ago. But still."
"...So." Meagan sighed. "Do we have a challenge or something? Or what?"
"...Uh, yeah." Chris improvised. "Your challenge is... go shut down the factory or something. Yeah, that. Do that."
The girls sighed deeply and reluctantly approached the factory.
A man wearing a Mr. Chapman mask was standing at a post outside the door. "Hello, visitors. What business have you here?"
"...We want to visit?" Meagan tried.
"Wrong!" The guard yelled. "You shall not pass."
Keetin leaped at the guard and kicked him several times in the groin until he fell to the floor unconsious.
Keetin pushed a button on the guard's control panel, and the gates to the factory opened up behind the girls.
The three entered, seeing the grand and large complex ahead of them.
"Whoa..." Keetin sighed. "What now?"
A man in a business outfit took hold of the trio and directed them over to a conveyor belt where blank, brown cardboard pieces. "You three. You're late." He scolded. "Well, with out wasting anymore time... your jobs are to paint these blank cardboard cutouts. Do it, let the cutouts go, and you're done."
"...How do you expect us do paint a man's spitting image like three times a minute for eight hours a day?" Meagan asked.
"Like this." The man responded. He painted a lifelike picture of Mr. Chapman onto the cardboard.
The girls looked on in astonishment.
"Yeah, do that everyday from now on." The man ordered. "Until you're fired or quit or whatever."
The trio reluctantly took their places and began their workday.
A montage was shown of the three hopelessly trying to paint the cardbaord cutouts and either getting almost nothing of it painted or painting it abhorrently, most times both.
After about an hour of this, the boss man came over to check on them. "How are you doi--" He noted how they were painting the cardboard pieces. "...What the heck do you think you're doing?!"
The girls blushed.
"Again, how'd you expect us to accomplish this?" Meagan sighed.
The man facepalmed. "Fine, then... just, fine."
Keetin sighed deeply. "Well, I'm out of here." She shoved the boss and trudged out of the building.
"...Dang it." The boss murmured. "I was going to make her clean the reactor core."
Foxface and Meagan's eyes lit up.
"The reactor core?" Meagan repeated.
The boss noddded. "Yes, of course. It's where all the factory's energy comes from. If it happened to shut down, this factory would be done for. Do you want to clean it?"
Foxface and Meagan both shook their heads at the same time.
"Mm. I've never had anyone volunteer to do this job before." The boss smirked. "How about you both do it? Foxy girl can clean the left side, lazy chick can clean the right side."
The two girls smiled at each other and went into the reactor room.
"Watch out!" The boss man called behind them. "It's a complicated job!"
Foxface and Meagan were shown sitting in front of a control panel with only three buttons.
"Yeah, real complicated." Meagan groaned sarcastically.
The three buttons read "Clean," "Shut Down," and "Wake Up."
Foxface stared in confusion at the third button.
Meagan shrugged and hit the third button playfully.
Meagan was suddenly shown lying awake in bed, panting.
The two other girls were woken up by this.
"Did you have a bad and/or weird dream?" Keetin asked.
Meagan nodded in response. "Mostly weird."
Keetin shrugged. "Was I in it?"
Meagan nodded once again.
"Then it could've been that bad." Keetin snorted.
Foxface rolled her eyes.
Chris entered the room. "Good news, ladies." He announced. "There will be no challenge today."
The three girls cheered.
"...But there will be elimination." Chris smirked.
"...What." Keetin protested flatly.
The three were shown at elimination that night.
"Final three." Chris cooed. "Tomorrow, this contest will come to an end as a winner is finally crowned. One of you will go home in a few minutes and will not get the million-dollar cash prize. And that person will not be Foxface."
Foxface smirked as she caught her ice-ball.
Meagan and Keetin looked forward boredly, knowing what was going to happen.
"The final ice-ball goes to...
Keetin caught it and flashed a half-smile at Meagan.
Meagan got up and gather her luggage. "As if I didn't see that coming. Have fun competing against each other, ladies. I'll be rooting for the person I didn't vote for just now." She boarded the plane without another word and disappeared.
Keetin and Foxface grinned at each other.
"Who will win the big prize?" Chris closed. "The strategic artist or the stealthy, creepy chick? Find out next time on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Chapter 17- Finale Destination II
Chris was shown in a dirty, filthy house sitting on a bed with a random, black-haired woman.
"We found bucks in the coldest place..." She sang. "We found bucks in the coldest place..."
The two were suddenly shown in Antarctica, during a snowstorm.
Chris began to sing, as well. "We found bucks in the coldest place, we found bucks in the coldest pla--"
"Woah, woah, woah." The girl inturrupted. "I don't roll that way, McLean."
The "snowstorm" behind them suddenly stopped and faded to a bright shade of green.
"Come on, Kihanna." Chris pleaded. "I need this music video for my show's finale."
"Yeah, so you rented a green screen?" The woman apparently named Kihanna sighed. "When you could've just flown us to your show's 'studio?'"
Chris blinked his eyes blankly. "...LOL, wut?"
Kihanna facepalmed and walked off-screen.
Chris was shown in his bedroom at a desk, scribbling away at a notepad. "Time to write another potential pop hit, which will obviously fail when my back-up singer quits on me."
Phil sighed from behind the camera. "Chris. This is the end of the season. I.E. when we get paid the most and receive the most ratings. Now recap that final three episode already."
Chris rolled his eyes and groaned. "Last time on Total Drama Antarctica." He started. "The female final three were challenged to find a way to crush Zari Arbinian's evil ways and shut down her Mr. Chapman-based factory... fortunately, that was only Meagan's dream. In real life, there was no challenge and we went right to the elimination. Not so surprisingly, Meagan was eliminated by the hand of Foxface and Keetin's alliance. Which of the two will win the million dollars? Who will decide their fate? How will they deal having to compete against each other? Find out right here on Total... Drama... Antarctica!"
Foxface and Keetin were shown sitting together in the girls' tent.
"So..." Keetin sighed.
Foxface stared at her blankly.
"We did it." Keetin squealed. "We made it to the final two. Now all we have to do is have one of us win, and our alliance will have succeeded."
Foxface shrugged. "..."
"Not a big talker, are you?" Keetin joked.
Foxface grinned. "I'm so glad you didn't say PJ..."
Keetin smirked. "PJ."
Foxface frowned and rolled her eyes.
"How do you think they'll decide the winner?" Keetin asked. "Maybe just a regular challenge like last season."
Chris came at the door. "Ladies." He cooed. "Follow me." He led the two into the Plane of Losers.
"Where are we going?" Keetin pondered.
Chris smirked. "You'll see in a minute, Little Miss Finalist."
The plane eventually landed at the tropical island where the losers were staying.
"...I don't like the look of this." Keetin whispered to Foxface.
The two were escorted to the losers' resort, where the fourteen eliminated compeititors were standing in a line in front of them.
"...The losers are going to vote for the winner?" Keetin guessed. "How original, Chris."
Chris ignored her comment and continued. "Keetin. Foxface. Both of you have worked your way through this game through alliances, strategy, and skill. But now, your fate rests in those you had to crush in order to get here. One by one, each of the losers will vote for who they think should win the million. Whoever gets the most votes will win Total Drama Antarctica."
"We know how voting works, Chris." Keetin scoffed.
Foxface nodded in agreement.
Chris rolled his eyes. "Just vote."
Betti was shown in the confessional, holding a slip of paper and a wooden box. "Who do I vote for? Foxface. She doesn't talk, and is therefore the least annoying of all these peasants." She stuffed the piece of paper into the box.
Betti was shown exiting the confessional, receiving hopeful glances from the finalists.
Betti cocked her head up superiorly and scoffed.
Zanibanito entered the confessional and stared directly into the camera. "Who do I vote for, you ask?! I vote for... TOASTED BAGEL. My best friend..." He continued to murmur incoherently.
He was then shown running out of the confessional, yelling into the sky about toasted bagel.
Ronald was shown in confessional, writing down several pages of notes on several slips of paper. "I am currently making careful and developed notes on who should receive my vote. Currently, I believe that Keetin played the game better both strategically and otherwise. My vote goes to her." He dug around for a slip of paper where he had written down Keetin's name and slipped it into the box.
Ronald stepped out from the confessional and gave an assuring nod to to Keetin.
Keetin grinned back at him.
Franklin then went into confessional and began ranting about his vote. "I vote Foxface, obviously. She's the least annoying out of all the poor people I'm forced to put up with here..." He looked to his left. "...Maybe I really am similar to Betti."
Franklin left the confessional and gave disapproving glances at both members of the final two.
Allan stepped into the confessional after him.
"Pretty awesome final two, eh?" He asked the camera in confessional. "But I think Keetin played the game a little more fairly and party...ly. So... yeah." He put the slip of paper he was writing on in the ballot box.
Allan was shown walking out of confessional, giving a wink at Keetin.
Keetin grinned, while Foxface rolled her eyes and scowled.
Cristen entered confessional shortly after.
"I, like, don't, like, really, like, care who..." Her voice drifted off as she started fiddling with her hair. "So, like, yeah, I'll vote for, like, Foxface, 'cause, like, she's, like..." Her voice drifted off once again as she began staring at the floor. She jammed a piece of paper into the ballot box.
As she stepped out, she gave an indifferent shrug to Foxface.
Foxface took it as a positive signal and smiled back.
Bunny was shown carefully stepping into the confessional.
"Well, I suppose I can take a short break from helping out those monkey for a minute..." She sighed. "So, yeah, I may be kind of pissed off over my elimination, but that doesn't mean I'm not still loyal. Keetin gets my vote, whether you like it or not." She slipped a piece of paper into the ballot box and proudly stepped out of the confessional.
Keetin and Foxface both waved shyly at her.
"...Uh, Chris." Keetin muttered. "Isn't Dustine supposed to go next? Isn't he in jail?"
Chris blushed. "Oh, yeah, we already planned for that..."
A helicopter suddenly began to descend above a few of the losers.
Ronald, Franklin, Allan, and Cristen ran from the spot they were at and hid behind some of their fellow contestants.
Dustine stepped out of the helicopter, being escorted by two security guards and was dragged into the confessional by them.
The contestants simply stared on with wide eyes.
Dustine was shown inside the confessional. He used a pencil to scribble "Foxface" down on a slip of paper and showed it to the camera. He slipped it into the wooden box and was escorted outside without another word.
Dustine was dragged back to the helicopter the same way he was taken out and the helicopter departed.
"...How'd you get the police to bring him here just to vote for the winner?" Meagan questioned.
Chris shrugged. "Showbiz isn't a normal thing. You learn that after a while."
"Well..." She managed through sobs. "I v-vote f-for..." She continued to bawl. "...F-Foxface." She stuffed a slip of paper into the box, blew her nose, and dragged herself out of the confessional.
Rufus rolled his eyes when he saw her stepping out.
Jennette entered confessional shortly after.
"Well, looks like the final two's here." She stated. "Well, partner, it seems like Keetin is the better choice for a winner. She did a dandy job for 'erself, and Foxace didn't say that much." She slipped her vote into the wooden box.
The finalists watched in anticipation as Kortney stepped into the confessional afterwards.
"My vote is pretty obvious." Kortney sighed in confessional. "Foxface didn't really make any social or strategic moves, so Keetin clearly used a more intelligent strategy... even if it involved getting rid of me. My vote goes to Keetin." He gently slipped the note into the ballot box.
Kortney stepped out and gave a sly wink to Keetin.
The strategic artist looked back at him in approval.
Luc stepped into the confessional.
"This isn't going to be too hard a decision." He told the camera. "I never really got to know Keetin, and I think she was behind my elimination. I talked to Foxface, like, all the time, even if she didn't talk back. She gets my vote." He slipped a piece of paper into the ballot box.
Luc stepped out and gave a shy grin to Foxface.
Foxface smiled back, just as shyly.
Keetin playfully nudged Foxface on the shoulder. "Mm-hmm..."
Foxface blushed and shrugged.
Rufus marched into the confessional cockily shortly after.
"As if I would ever give any of them my vote, if they weren't the only options." He scoffed. "But, since they are, Foxface seems like the weaker oen. Maybe I could get a kiss out of her if she wins... or loses." He stuffed his vote into the box and walked out.
Meagan then entered confessional in order to cast the final vote and decide the winner.
"Pretty easy vote I have here." She said. "I don't really consider myself a 'friend' of either of them, but Foxface never really talked to me at all, disregarding the fact she never talks to anyone. My vote goes to Keetin." She rolled her eyes at herself and put the paper into the wooden box.
The camera went to static afterwards for a few seconds.
Zari Arbinian was shown in the confessional, using a screwdriver to pop the top of the the ballot box open. She smirked and stuffed it to the brim with several slips of paper. She looked directly at the camera. "How else can I ensure my favorite contestant'll win?"
Chris was shown looking through the votes, the camera now outside of confessional. "And the votes have been counted!" He announced.
The two finalists leaned in for the final announcement of the season.
"Come on, come on..." Keetin pleaded softly.
Foxface folded her arms and looked at Chris in anticipation.
"And..." Chris continued. "The winner of Total Drama Antarctica is...
Keetin cheered exstaticly and jumped up and down excitedly.
Foxface folded her arms and frowned indifferenly. She begrudgingly shook Keetin's hand and walked away from the crowd, feeling abandened.
Keetin looked to the losers. "So, um... yeah. Sorry if I hurt any of you... but since most of you voted for me to win, I guess you don't really need an apology." She chuckled. "But, I wasn't really myself in this game... cheers to a fresh start? ...Y'know, if I ever see any of you again after today." She chuckled once again.
The people who had voted for Keetin came over to embrace her in a cheer and lifted her up in the air.
No one seemed to notice Foxface's supporters were the bigger group, and soon they too simply shrugged it off and joined the celebration.
Zari was staring on at the group in amusement, chuckling sadistically to herself. "All according to plan..." She winked at the camera.
Chris handed Keetin the silver suitcase that contained the million dollars.
Keetin cheered and jumped in the air, accidentally smacking Rufus in the face with the suitcase.
Rufus keeled over in pain.
"Karmaaa..." Keetin sung playfully, still celebrating.
Chris faced the camera, as many in the episode had done. "It's been a great second season, here on Total Drama Antarctica." He closed. "See all of you next season on Total... Drama... Marsh!"
Foxface was shown sitting in the corner, lying against a palm tree. She was wiping tears from her eyes, staring at the ground. A shadow suddenly appeared above her.
Luc was grinning down at her, offering a hand. "Hey... I just noticed you sitting here and... erm... want to dance?"
Foxface cracked a smile for the first time in a while. "Sure..." She muttered. The two rejoined the crowd and shared a slow dance.
Zari's head peered over the corner. She cracked a smile, like Foxface had done. "All according to plan..."
*Keetin was going to be eliminated, but Franklin quit before she could leave.
- Foxface is based on a character of the same name from The Hunger Games series.
- Kortney was created by Reddy.
- Lily is based loosely upon Ty Lee from Avatar: The Last Airbender.
- Keetin is named after Keetin Marchi, runner-up of the second season of Endurance.
- Dustine is an obvious parody of Justin Bieber.
- Cristen is an obvious parody of the Twilight character Bella Swan and her actress, Kristen Stewart.
- Franklin is named after Benjamin Franklin, who is on the hundred dollar bill.
- Betti's original name was Betty.
- Rufus' original name was Blake.
- Jennette's original name was Jess.
- Lily's original name was Mikayla.
- Meagan's original name was Kellie.
- Ronald's original name was Lenny.
- Bunny and Keetin were the only ones to retain their original names.
- Allan, Cristen, Dustine, Foxface, Franklin, Kortney, Luc, and Zanibanito were not in the original.
- The season was set in Antarctica, simply for variety.
- Ronald makes several references to TD:PB upon his arrival.
- Betti's last name is French for "grapefruit."
- Mr. McLean's Penguins is a reference to Mr. Popper's Penguins.
- Foxface's real name is Fiona, as revealed in this chapter.
- Zanibanito saying "cheese shorts" is a slight reference to Perform This Way by Weird Al.
- Dustine saying "never say never" is a reference to Never Say Never by Justin Bieber.
- Kortney's comment about Dustine is a reference to Onion News Network, a news parody.
- Allan's friend, Katheryn Hudson, is a reference to Katy Perry. Katheryn Hudson is her birth name.
- Allan saying that he attended a party "last friday night" is a reference to Last Friday Night by Katy Perry.
- Betti was eliminated for plot reasons.
- In the original version of the story, Betti placed twelfth out of twelve.
- The title is a reference to Jeff Kinney's Diary of a Wimpy Kid.
- Lady Googoo is a parody of Lady Gaga.
- Italiano is a parody of the song Americano by Lady Gaga.
- Luc's song is a parody of Telephone by Lady Gaga.
- Sprit is a parody of Sprite.
- The female intern is based upon Totalcartoonfan09.
- Lizard Ball X is a parody of Dragon Ball Z.
- Cristen's home movie is a reference to Twilight.
- Edgar is a reference to Edward Cullen from Twilight.
- Zanibanito was eliminated for plot reasons.
- Zanibanito was not in the original version of the story.
- Southern News Network (SNN) is a parody of CNN.
- Key$ha is a parody of Ke$ha.
- Kortney's friend Shanaynay is a reference to the character from Shane Dawson.
- Dustine's line when he talks to Jennette make reference to One Less Lonely Girl and Baby, both by Justin Bieber.
- The songs Franklin was listening to are references to Price Tag by Jessie J and Money Money Money by ABBA.
- Ronald was eliminated so that Meagan could get a different plot.
- Ronald was place tenth out of twelve in the original version of the story.
- Dustine's bodyguard is based on Toadgamer80.
- The show Allan describes is a parody of Phineas and Ferb.
- Franklin was eliminated for plot purposes.
- Franklin was not in the original version of the story.
- The title is meant to be a parody of the SAT test.
- The picture of the girl is a reference to Selena Gomez.
- Diznee Channel is a parody of Disney Channel.
- Rufus saying his girlfriend could've been named Katrina or Sabrina is a reference to the characters from Total Drama: Boney Island.
- The song Luc was singing is a parody of Peacock by Katy Perry.
- Originally, Cristen was going to mention that Train A's conductor's name was Thomas. This would have been a reference to Thomas the Train. The author simply forgot to include this.
- The purple-haired boy is a reference to Vincent from Total Drama Revolution.
- Allan was eliminated because the author saw him as a very minor character.
- Allan was not in the original version of the story.
- The title is a reference to the Total Drama Island episode, Dodgebrawl.
- Toys R We is a parody of Toys R Us.
- The Largest Loser is a parody of The Biggest Loser.
- Timagagchi is a parody of Tomagotchi.
- The thing that appears on the screen is a reference to Nyan Cat.
- Isher is a parody of Usher.
- Fifth Grade Education for Idiots is a parody of the For Dummies books.
- Rufus calling Jennette Betty Sue is a slight reference to Victorious.
- Cristen was eliminated because the author saw her as the most expendable character remaining and was no longer interested in writing for her.
- Cristen was not in the original version of the story.
- The title is a reference to the song Lighters by Eminem. (featuring Bruno Mars and some other guy I don't care about)
- Kortney saying, "PJ style for the win." is a reference to PJ from Total Drama Revolution.
- Chris Black is a parody of Chris Brown.
- The familar-looking blonde girl is obviously Jena.
- The myPhones so often mentioned are parodies of iPhones.
- Bunny was eliminated for plot reasons.
- The coin Chris called Coiny is a reference to Coiny from the YouTube series, Battle for Dream Island.
- The three mentions of PJ are references to PJ from Total Drama Revolution.
- Kristina Grammie and Meg Nicky are parodies of Christina Grimmie and Megan Nicole, respectively.
- Born Insane, Madonna, I Kissed A Girl For Attention, and Teenage Nightmare are parodies of Born This Way, Judas, I Kissed A Girl, and Teenage Dream, respectively.
- The song Dustine as singing is a parody of Baby.
- Dustine's cellmates are parodies of Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cyrus, and Lady Gaga.
- Dustine was eliminated for plot reasons.
- The title is a reference to the board game, Game of Life.
- Again, this episode contains reference to PJ from Total Drama Revolution.
- The challenge is based on one of the challenges from Endurance.
- Lily was eliminated for plot reasons, mostly Rufus's.
- The title is a reference to "In Soviet Russia" jokes.
- The actress Rhonda was named after Rhonda the stalker fan! for no real reason.
- Katy, Jerry, and Marill are obviously from Total Drama: Peaceful Greens by Total Drama Zinc.
- Rufus' mention of a kid named Jarrod is a reference to Jarrod from Total Drama City.
- Keetin's picture is a reference to Jake and Lady Rainicorn from Adventure Time.
- Worst Buy is an obvious parody of Best Buy.
- Luc's music video is a parody of Blah Blah Blah by Ke$ha.
- Jennette was eliminated for plot reasons.
- The title is a reference to Two Girls, One Cup.
- Jett Probst is a parody of Jeff Probst, the host of Survivor.
- The Gemmies appeared in the Total Drama Action episode, Celebrity Manhunt's Total Drama Action Reunion Special.
- Again, this episode contains a reference to PJ from Total Drama Revolution.
- The boy in the drawing is a reference to Dolph from Total Drama Revolution.
- McRonald's is a parody of McDonald's.
- Kortney was eliminated for plot reasons, despite him being one of the author's favorites to write for.
- The title comes from something said by Rufus during the chapter.
- The Silver Strawberry Awards are parodies of the Golden Raspberry Awards.
- The bald skater Rufus mentions is a reference to Evan from Total Drama Athletics.
- Japann Anna McClone is a parody of Chyna Anne McLean.
- The shows that came on the TV are references to ANT Farm and Two and a Half Men.
- The "drunk one" Meagan mentions is a reference to Charlie Sheen.
- Dolph from Total Drama Revolution appears in this chapter as the storyteller.
- The 26-year-old, 17-year-old, and 12-year old are references to Sprinklemist, TDIwriter, and the author, respectively.
- Luc was eliminated for plot reasons, and to prevent a predictable ending with him winning.
- The title is a reference to Scream.
- MyCircle is a parody of YouTube.
- Keetin's fantasies are references to Shane Dawson, Fred, Ray William Johnson, and iJustine, respectively.
- Again, PJ from Total Drama Revolution is referenced.
- Rufus is shown singing Womanizer by Britney Spears.
- Rufus was eliminated simply for plot reasons.
- Zari Arbinian is inspired by... absolutely no one.
- This chapter is probably the shortest to date.
- This chapter is the author's least favorite.
- This chapter is not receiving any love.
- Toad from Total Drama Revolution appears in this chapter.
- Zari Arbinian makes a reappearence and is, again, based on absolutely no one.
- This chapter's title is a pun on Mr. Chapman's name and "chapter," abbreviated as "chappy."
- How Meagan's dream was shown and why part of the real episode wasn't is simply a gap of logic.
- Meagan was eliminated to avoid a predictable winner, as she is both the author favorite and fan favorite.
- The title is a reference to the Final Destination series, and is referred to as the second one because it is the second finale of the author's main canon.
- Kihanna is a parody of Rihanna.
- The song at the beginning is a parody of We Found Love by Rihanna.
- The ending was changed and pondered over several times. Some endings included Foxface winning instead, Keetin winning with a few details changed, and in the original story, a character cut from this version won over Keetin and Foxface did not exist. A joke ending had Zari stuff the ballot box with votes for herself, thus winning Total Drama Antarctica.
- For the last freaking time, Zari Arbinian is not based on anyone.